Quotes!

[nycwriters]

.

[dickieC]

I evidently knew more about economics than my examiners.

Keynes, on taking the Indian Civil Service exam.

But this long run is a misleading guide to current affairs. In the long run we are all dead.

on aspects of classical monetary economics.

[dinzdale]

"Reginald bounded out of bed, and as he commenced his ablutions, he knew it was going to be a big cock day".....Emily Bronte.

[noxxville]

"My god you have a long signature."
-My boss yesterday

[rmr]

Do you have a long name?

[noxxville]

"I would never do crack... I would never do a drug named after a part of my own ass, okay?"
Denis Leary

"The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind."
Humprey Bogart

"My mother was like a sister to me, only we didn't have sex quite so often."
Emo Philips

"I think people should be free to engage in any sexual practices they choose; they should draw the line at goats though."
Elton John

"USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population."
David Letterman

"One time a guy handed me a picture of himself, and he said, "Here's a picture of me when I was younger." Every picture of you is of when you were younger. Here's a picture of me when I am older. You son of a bitch, how'd you pull that off? Let me see that camera..."
Mitch Hedberg

"I bought a doughnut and they gave me a receipt for the doughtnut...I don't need a receipt for the doughnut - I give you money and you give me the doughnut, end of transaction. We don't need to bring ink and paper into this. I can't imagine a scenario that I would have to prove that I bought a doughnut. To some skeptical friend, Don't even act like I didn't buy a doughnut, I've got the documentation right here ..."
Mitch Hedberg

[rmr]

Shite --- you sure do have a long signature.

[Deviate]

"No wait it's at home in the file...
under D...
for doughnut.
we all know what 'D' is."
(continuing from noxx's doughnut quote)

"I've always wanted to have a breifcase handcuffed to my wrist. Alright..."

"I think Pringles initial intention was to make tennis balls. But when the rubber was supposed to show up a big truck load of potatoes arrived instead. And Pringles is a laid back company, they just said, 'FVCK It! Cut 'em up!"

-Mitch Hedberg

[red]

I saw this one today.

"Don't worry about the world coming to an end today.
It's already tomorrow in Australia."

~Charles Schultz