The One -

[lapietra]

Since Beale is all tied up in court :D I thought I'd take the liberty... this was inspired by Dinz's description of his perfect slu... I mean, soulmate and companion.

Describe yours. This can be silly or serious - or both :)

[Deviate]

silly
playful
fun
exploratory
pushing the edge
drawing new lines
and colouring outside the ones already drawn
skips
dances
says the word "love" often
would rather be happy
than stew in sorrow
is sunshine
despite rain
is warmth
despite cold shoulders
has tears
for a heart
that drinks the poison of sadness
and provides affection
adoration
and complete
and utter
devotion

[masterofNone]

an object in motion.
a former girl next door.
a whirlwind.
challenging, articulate, childlike, curious.

unexpected beauty
undervalued brilliance
uncertain, unsure, unfamiliar at times
unabashed, unflappable, unstoppable others

soft and enveloping
nuzzling and quiet laughter
draping an arm
touching a leg

simple respect
enduring admiration
inextinguishable passion
unending friendship
adventure

[priceyfatprude]

Breathing.

[lapietra]

Originally posted by priceyfatprude
Breathing.
hahahahahahahaha!!!

[Deviate]

thought you said "breeding", which is also very funny.

-st.

[lapietra]

Yeah - after the first two breathtakingly beautiful posts - that. HAH!
Have to say, I do understand :)

[Red Princess]

aaack, mush! *explodes*

[lapietra]

Originally posted by Red Princess
aaack, mush! *explodes*

dude - post something non-mushy! Quick!!!!!!

[masterofNone]

is it too late to add.... big jugs?

[lapietra]

It's never too late to add big jugs.

Tho' I've heard the skin isn't quite as elastic after a certain age....

:D

[Deviate]

and sometimes big jugs are nice, too.

-st.

[lapietra]

He's funny, strong, and gentle; patient, persuasive, compassionate. He's honest. Can be wacky playful but always knows when to get serious. He never judges, is never petty. He empowers everyone around him. He's confident enough that he can admit to mistakes... at least sometimes.

He makes me laugh, even when I'm miserable, eventually; smart enough to be one step ahead of me sometimes, though only to surprise and delight me, not to one-up or humiliate me. He knows more than me about some things, likes to teach. Enjoys letting me teach him.

He always strives to find the positive twist in a situation. When he's angry or sad, he trusts and respects me enough to tell me or ask me for help.
He is passionate - about life, about his goals, about me - but still well grounded in reality. He doesn't try to control me or make me feel ashamed if I don't do things his way, but tries to understand why.

He's not intimidated or confused by my strength, my passion, my sometimes obsessive drive when I get an idea or create a goal and want to follow it, sometimes mixed with insecurity, especially at the beginning when everything seems so insurmountable. He loves and encourages that - wants to support me - helps me stay on track - and lets me do the same for him.

He loves all living things and always strives to live his life in a way that demonstrates that. He loves and is knowledgeable about music and art and enjoys educating himself about them, loves going to concerts and museums and the theatre.

He's dependable in the ways that count, but can be spontaneous... he doesn't care too much about money, more about doing things that will make life more enjoyable - but he *is* better than I am with money - :D Somehow together we make that work out.

He loves the outdoors, looks for reasons to be out in the world, climbing mountains, playing in the dirt and water, but also loves dressing up, performing the role of romantic gallant every once in a while. He dresses appropriately - doesn't need to always look smashing - but knows when it's time for jeans and when it's time for black tie.

He loves to talk philosophy and spirituality but not dogma. The universe is a friendly place for him - it's all up for speculation and conversation.

He likes the way he looks but it isn't that important to him - tries to stay in good shape, good health, but isn't obsessive about it.

He has healthy habits, but still likes to party sometimes :D - appreciates good beer & wine, but doesn't use it to disappear or hide - he has other ways of dealing with stress - hobbies and enthusiasms that he takes seriously enough to be really good at them.

He's taken enough passionate risks that he has some regrets. He's learned from them.

He's got a nice voice... you can hear him smiling even when you can't see him.

And he's got a nice, muscley, furry chest. (Okay, that's negotiable.:D)
edit oh... and sometimes he brings me flowers - for no reason at all...

[dinzdale]

Lapietra meant to add...

He has an English accent and a big willy.

[lapietra]

Oh - good grief - How could I forget that????

Well... actually... any accent from the British Isles'll do... :)

[dickieC]

I hate to be cruel, but...


Can you say: DEMANDING.........?


We're only human, ladies.

[lapietra]

HAH!

I invite you to look at the personal ads posted by 98% of men who indulge in such behaviors -

Who's more demanding?

Anyway Dickie - don't be put off by it - these are ideals.
I think if I found someone who resembled 75% of this I'd be ecstatic... ;)

[dickieC]

Yeah, well, most male personals translate as "if you've got large breasts, you've pulled, goodnight".

Sad but true.

[Arif-ul Haq]

d

[Red Princess]

or you could go jump the temp guy with the ponytail

[lapietra]

Well - I've just read NYC's post for the 4th time and there doesn't seem to be anything unreasonable about it -

The thing is - the better you know yourself - the more specific you're bound to be. I happen to think Peg's just as remarkable a person as the man she's describing. She's worked really hard to become that person. Why shouldn't she want and be able to find someone like that?


*climbs down off soapbox*

[Red Princess]

*climbs up on soap box* my question is this: if you have the ideal guy in mind how do you know when you have found him? the way i look at it, if the criteria is extensive at what point do negotiations break down? how far can you get into someone's head before you find a reason to reject them? i figure i will keep an open mind, explore the possbilities. hoping that someone turns out to be who you are looking for might keep you from finding out who they really are.
*steps down from soapbox*
doesn't hurt if they have an english accent and a big willie either

[priceyfatprude]

I will know when I meet him. I have not yet met him.


"I put up w/your crap, and you put up w/my crap!"

"That's marriage?"

"This is what I'm thinking."


Seriously, everyone has deal breakers. I hate to think I'm too picky, but I don't think honesty, intelligence, kindness, generosity, etc is too much to ask for in another human being.

edited to add honesty, as it is the king of all dealbreakers

[Red Princess]

and and and and... what's the breakdown on priorities? devil's advocate here. i just finished rereading Women and Love, Shere Hite's third Hite report book (think it's the third one) anyhow , i was reading all this stuff that women are looking for and hoping for and wishing for and leaving other guys for and it made me sad. i kept thinking that acceptance BECAUSE of someone's human frailties is part of the deal, instead it seemed like they were never satisfied, always wanting more, more attention, more talk, more listening, gak! no wonder guys give up. i started to feel very sorry for men trying to keep up with the wants and demands. does this get me kicked out of the girl's club?

[lapietra]

I agree with you, RP - but once you've id'd the criteria you just - know - maybe not immediately, but pretty soon. I don't know about Peg's, but I think mine leaves a lot of elements open for possibility.

I've had to memorize huge amounts of text and music to be performed onstage. If you perform something, ideally, you have to have it memorized so well that you don't really think about it anymore. You just perform it. And the information gets more and more ingrained. You never really have to think about it again - at least, not unless you leave it for a long time ;)

The description I've posted is nothing compared to that. I'm pretty sure that when you know, you just know. It's not about rejecting someone because they don't fit the criteria. It's about having standards and knowing yourself and what works for you.

I personally know it's time to leave things alone when something about that person makes me desperately sad. I'm not going to change them. So it's a dealbreaker.

Obviously - I'm single - so maybe I'm wrong. :) But that feels right to me...
edit You'll never get kicked out of the girl's club if I have any say!!! :D

[masterofNone]

in the end it boils down to pheromones anyway. The rest is all poetry.

[Red Princess]

i don't know if i will 'just know',that part seems like a fairy tale to me. my mom still bitches about stuff she didnt like about my dad and he has been dead for 5 years, complains about things she had to'accept' from 50 years ago for crissake, if she had 'accepted' it why does it still piss her off? i don't want to be like that.

[lapietra]

Big smooch to you too Peg.

Just wanted to say one more thing. There is *nothing* magical about this. If you take enough time to get to know yourself, you will know what makes you happy, and you will recognise it.
That's all. :)

[Red Princess]

no magic? hmmm, perhaps the potion was too much...*pours out funny smelling liquid into the sink*

[lapietra]

awwwwwww sh*t!!!!!

*runs to the sink & starts lapping up the potion*

:D

[Red Princess]

not to worry , i can make more, you give it to some one you want and they fall drooling at your feet , willing to do anything you like, works pretty good

[lapietra]

*feeling an uncontrollable urge to go the the airport and get on a plane going to....???*

[Red Princess]

CUBA to save beale

[masterofNone]

So it's 19 minutes into The West Wing and I'm realizing she has to speak to me and with me the way the First Lady speaks to the President in that show and, you know, make me want to speak to her and with her in that way too.

[lapietra]

uuhhhhh....

Is *save* a euphemism for something?


*looks around desperately for duct tape*

[Red Princess]

Originally posted by lapietra
uuhhhhh....

Is *save* a euphemism for something?


*looks around desperately for duct tape*
ha ha ha ha , do with him what you will , he is a convicted chipper

[lapietra]

HAH!

You assume that the duct tape is for *him*... :D

[Red Princess]

who else?

[lapietra]

:D

I bet you know where the plane is really going, too...

[Red Princess]

this is how it starts when you get kicked out of the girls club, all of a sudden you don't know what's going on

[lapietra]

no no no

You're in - in fact, you're one of the Senior Members -
:)
We can't kick you out.

[Red Princess]

is the tape for dinz?

[lapietra]

Well... I was thinking of using it on myself...

:D

[Red Princess]

gets rid of warts too, i hear

[lapietra]

It works, it does!!!

See any warts on me? Nope.

I should do commercials...

"Duct tape! The snake oil of the 21st century....."

[imdrsmooth]

Brings me down from clouds since that's where I am most of the time.
Able to make decisions
knows I am really scatter brained so it takes me awhile to explain thoughts.
Is very patient.
Can handle me when I am nervous because I seem like I'm really mad.
Is able to talk about problems.
Someone that fills in the qualities I am missing.
needs woman parts.

[priceyfatprude]

I'm waiting for someone to write,

"Must have really big dick"

Oh wait, someone did. doesn't hurt if they have an english accent and a big willie either

[beckstra]

On the surface, I'd prefer someone equal or taller than me in height. I'm a sucker for dark hair and dark eyes, but sometimes those redhaired boys... I also enjoy broad shoulders and relatively large (not to be confused with fleshy), pointy, slightly crooked noses.

As far as the internal "stuff," I would hope for him to be thoughtful. Also, I'd be greatful if he'd take initiative, because I'm told I suck at doing so.

I'd like someone who balances my seriousness. Also, who balances me when I'm slap-happy. Sense of humor is a must, none of this emo crap. He must also be funny.

I would like someone who makes me feel light on my toes, or at least someone who lights me up inside. I'd like someone who helps me to revel more than grovel.

I would like someone who's sincere and has a genuine spirit. I would like to marry someone who believes he has the call of God on his life...whether it's to be a pastor, an artist, or a janitor.

I would like someone who talks a lot. Someone who lets me get my words in, but will take care of most of the conversation...I'm not good at much more than asking the right questions and being utterly dopey, stumbling over my jokes or talking too quiet. I would also like him to know how to dig into me...get me out of myself.

More than anything, I want an equal.

[lapietra]

Originally posted by beckstra
... I'm a sucker for dark hair and dark eyes, but sometimes those redhaired boys...

I hear ya, Beck. :) Also the part about being equals...

[beckstra]

:D

[imdrsmooth]

I'd like to add that my perfect girl would love going on Dairy Queen/Baskin Robbins runs and even suggest them.

[dickieC]

OK, time to stop being cynical. Dinz told me I had to do it...

1. No smoking (it's a filthy habit and snogging is like licking an ashtray).

2. No piercings (they give me the heeby-jeebies)

3. No drugs (Just Say No)

4. No fvckwittage (i.e. any history of being involved with more than one person at once)

5. No religious types

6. Aged not more than three years older or younger

7. From the British Isles, but well-travelled

8. Able to understand the chapter 'Parenthesis' in the novel "A History of the World in 10 1/2 Chapters" by Julian Barnes.

Otherwise I'm really not fussy.

[chuckie egg]

Originally posted by Deviate
and sometimes big jugs are nice, too.

-st.

.... and useful for carrying vast quantities of liquid... i.e beer

[chuckie egg]

Originally posted by dickieC
OK, time to stop being cynical. Dinz told me I had to do it...

1. No smoking (it's a filthy habit and snogging is like licking an ashtray).

2. No piercings (they give me the heeby-jeebies) thats me out

3. No drugs (Just Say No)

4. No fvckwittage (i.e. any history of being involved with more than one person at once)

5. No religious types ..and again

6. Aged not more than three years older or younger ..and again

7. From the British Isles, but well-travelled

8. Able to understand the chapter 'Parenthesis' in the novel "A History of the World in 10 1/2 Chapters" by Julian Barnes. ...and again

Otherwise I'm really not fussy.


:(

[dickieC]

Aww, Chuckie, you're my friend. I'll go ice-skating with you any day.

[bealeblues]

dammit man... and just when i thought someone was coming to save me from fidel....

i've noticed that "radio quality voice with a southern accent" has been conspicuously absent from the wimmens list of qualifications... come on girls, don't be shy....

[Red Princess]

right now i would give everything i own (except my powerbook) to any guy who could get rid of the stress i am enjoying at the moment

[masterofNone]

hee heeeeeee




I thought it was appropriate to post this here. My ex-wife (who was the ONE twenty years ago) called to tell me she's suing me for back child support on our 18 year old. I stopped paying when he turned 18 in August, but since failing a course last year he needed to go to high school part time this year. So now she's blindsiding me with a law suit. Essentially I'm penalized because she didn't check his homework and I get to provide cash incentive for perpetual failure.



whoo hooo!

[Red Princess]

i apologise on behalf of all women who would never do such a thing. may she get a painful and revolting rash.

[masterofNone]

for a minute I thought you said painful and revolting gash ... she already has one of those.

[dickieC]

Oh dear, that's below the belt, on two counts...

[Red Princess]

bad MoN, bad.
ha ha ha ha ha

[bealeblues]

the fvcking lawyer who took that case against a father who paid his child support diligently until the child turned 18 should be strapped to an mound of fire ants..... i'm not saying that there isn't a law which permits such a suit in this particular situation (i'm not in VA after all), but just b/c there may be a law for something doesn't mean that it justifies a lawsuit.....

this is why i hate lawyers, even though i am one

[Red Princess]

how did you get back from cuba? did you bring us any cigars?

[amanda]

Originally posted by masterofNone
So it's 19 minutes into The West Wing and I'm realizing she has to speak to me and with me the way the First Lady speaks to the President in that show and, you know, make me want to speak to her and with her in that way too.

When I saw The Thin Man for the first time, I told myself, "That's it. If I ever get married, that's the kind of marriage I want"

Nick and Nora Charles. only with about 3/4's less of the alcohol.

as for my other requirements- I had that "perfect" mate.

Adventurous- spent nine years traveling, awesome sailor, avid scuba diver, near RAF pilot; intelligent beyond education- his logic astounded me, especially when we got into debates. Witty, charming, even had that English accent that dinz is on about.

But most of all, he was my best friend.

We had fun together in every aspect. We understood each other- we could help one another out of situations which others had absolutely no frame of reference. We shared the same ambitions, fought the same battles, found refuge in the same ports.

But, in the end, he didn't love me.
And, in the end, I couldn't trust him.


So, now- I'm not bitter.
But I really relish my time alone.

[rmr]

The Making Of Mr. Right

He has a lust for life...you're able to tell that just by looking at him. He's sexy, but not in an obvious way. He's very comfortable in his own skin and knows exactly who he is and where he has come from. He has a past and is proud of it. He's also quite comfortable with the fact that I have tried to live life to it's fullest and he's not jealous of that. He can make me laugh.....belly laugh. He's affectionate and loving, but knows that when it's time to go to sleep it's ok to let go :). He's able to communicate and is in touch with his feelings, yet is not wanting to talk about them all the time. He's successful but on his own terms. He doesn't feel the need to impress others, because he knows who he is. He's a gentlemen when needed, but also he's a complete goofball. He knows that sometimes I need him to just hold my hand. He loves his family and friends. He knows how important my family and friends are to me. He MUST enjoy Sunday brunch and not be allergic to pets (the last one had those two factors against him). He'll be open-minded and not judgmental of others. He'll be very sweet....he'll be best friend. He'll be the first person I'll want to talk to every morning and the last person I want to talk to every night. We'll recognize eachother when we meet.

[Deviate]

no pants.

-st.

[rmr]

That too

[Deviate]

;)

i'm so predictable...

-st.

[rmr]

The One

http://nataliedee.corrupt.net/110702/pants.jpg

[Deviate]

ROFL!

-st.

[amanda]

yeah.

I sounded WAY too fatalistic in that last one.
Alright Greta Garbo, back in your closet.

If someone is kind enough to hand you a hypothetical magic lamp, the least you can do is try to use it.

Here we go...

confident.
imaginative and not afraid to use it.
can tolerate losing me in a bookstore, juggling in the grocery store, and tearing up in a pet store.
can appreciate the simple, yet understand the complex.
patient.
able to challenge me, calls me on my shit as well as my limitations, and yet understands that I am stubborn for my own reasons.
allows me to challenge him, call him on his shit as well as his limtations, and has his own reasons for being stubborn.
never ceases to amaze me just being himself.
plays. everywhere.
knows when to leave me alone. and when not to.
laughs at himself.
can be a worthy opponent, an unequalled man, and a partner-in-crime, all at the same time.
has something to share and is willing to trade with me.
likes the water.

there are others, of course. But it's like trying to articulate a jungle into a garden. We'll both know it when we see it, eventually.
Maybe...

[imdrsmooth]

Originally posted by amanda
can be a worthy opponent, an unequalled man, and a partner-in-crime, all at the same time.

So you're on a crime *dum dum dummmmmmmm*
You're searching out the criminal *long guitar wail*
You open the door *bummmm bumm dumm bummmmmmmmm*
Your partner is the criminal!!!!!! *timpini goes crazy*
Do you turn him in?

[lapietra]

rmr - that pic really makes me smile... :)

[rmr]

isn't that the cutest damn thing....i want to thank whoever it was that introduced me to google image search. my life has never been the same!!

[Red Princess]

ours either

[noxxville]

the one-

smart but doesn't lecture
confident but not cocky
silly but not ridiculous (well....most of the time)
honest...always
emotional
crabby
stubborn but not immovable
can follow (or at least just accept) my twisted ass train of thought
understands that i just know 80's songs
doesn't feel the need to wear makeup all of the time
will play board games
will bite when requested
realizes that I'm usually joking

[rmr]

Noxx!!! You're back...how the hell was the trip???

[noxxville]

It WAS.

Snorkeling: shark, barracuda, stingray, turtle, massive shellfish, coral, schools of fish

Jungle: out in the middle of nowhere with an ex-patriot that lives amongst the trees, cave swimming, bats, ants that have cut trails into the grounds (looks like someone was riding around on a motorcycle), lunch at a Mayan familes palapa in the middle of the jungle

Ruins: need I say more?

Various animals just roaming about like they belonged there (which, I guess they do). Nothing like eating a lunch and looking up to see a rather large grey iguana just watching you.

Festivities, plays, many many naps.

coronas: 2 for $2.50

[rmr]

Sounds incredible....any spider monkeys?

Can't wait to see your pics!!!

[Trishya]

ZE