"and then" (Three Word Story)

[cosmo949]

fragrantly yet invisibly

[lapietra]

it wafted

[Cr.Box]

that smell. That inevitable smell.

[AllegroNg]

Leggo my Eggo!

[cosmo949]

her eyes gleamed

[beckstra]

that inevitable sparkle that rang

[Panda]

sharply through the caves crystals

[Cr.Box]

how many days had she been trapped in here?

[cosmo949]

and where was her phone

[soulstand]

but in her

[lapietra]

shoes, muddy and rain-soaked

[shadowfax]

drat! ruined toilet-paper.

[Wench]

If only I

[amanda]

could see the salmon-colored sky

[Wench]

and smell the waffle

[amanda]

and find the bloody phone

[lapietra]

I'd feel less awful...

[Fluffygorilla]

about the rabbid cave-monsters

[Panda]

if they'd stop

[Wench]

their gnashing and

[cosmo949]

chronic whining despite

[lapietra]

my constant attention.

[Cr.Box]

And where the hell did Jimmy go? she thought.

[cosmo949]

He needs a keeper.

[lapietra]

Any volunteers?

[Cr.Box]

She asked out loud.

[cosmo949]

Sighing noisely, she

[lapietra]

sniffed the air again

[cosmo949]

and hummed the

[lapietra]

tune to "Liebestod"

[cosmo949]

although the melody

[Panda]

of death metal

[Wench]

whined above her.

[lapietra]

It was actually

[Panda]

a suprisingly mellow

[Wench]

mood that engulfed

[Panda]

the orange background

[Wench]

. She focused only

[zefrank]

on the curvature

[zenbabe]

of her spine

[cosmo949]

pressed against the

[dinzdale]

imported Italian marble

[lapietra]

tried to relax

[cosmo949]

despite the cold

[Panda]

floor, draining the

[Wench]

heat from her

[zenbabe]

electromagnetic power source

[cosmo949]

"Stop touching that

[lapietra]

shiny Wagnerian tuba!"

[cosmo949]

she scolded herself

[surflugen]

and then pondered

[cosmo949]

her next move.

[surflugen]

Suddenly from above,

[Panda]

came a paper-plane

[cosmo949]

scrawled with crayon

[JudyPatooty]

weighed down by

[surflugen]

a little leprechaun

[Panda]

firing a gattling-gun

[JudyPatooty]

. Bullets ricocheted off

[surflugen]

her shiny forehead

[Panda]

like ping-pong balls

[netflower]

, *ping* *boink* *bonk*.

[surflugen]

"Damn you leprechaun!"

[Glyph]

"Why can't you ever

[cosmo949]

use the phone

[Glyph]

like a normal person?"

[Panda]

"IM A LEPRECHAUN,

[surflugen]

hear me squeal!!"

[cosmo949]

Where's my scooter?

[Glyph]

It left the scene

[nycwriters]

accompanied by a

[JudyPatooty]

an oversized caterpiller,

[nycwriters]

who promised marshmallows

[AllegroNg]

in little purple

[catbelly]

pots of jelly

[nycwriters]

So he decided

[cosmo949]

it was time

[nycwriters]

to open the

[cosmo949]

secret forbidden passageway

[AllegroNg]

. "Troll, help open

[amanda]

this bloody door!"

[nycwriters]

The troll grunted

[zenbabe]

*hack* another loogie

[nycwriters]

and shuffled to

[zenbabe]

get some bacon

[nycwriters]

ignoring the door.

[Panda]

"TROLLL!!!" whipsered Leprechaun

[RuneT]

. "One more time

[Panda]

from the TOP!"

[zenbabe]

So he sang

[cosmo949]

Mack the Knife

[Panda]

's eleventy-second symphony

[JudyPatooty]

at the top

[Panda]

of the McGillyCuddyReeks

[cosmo949]

"We need a

[nycwriters]

furry little varmit

[cosmo949]

to experiment on

[nycwriters]

I knock again.

[lapietra]

"Andrey? Natasha? Anfisa?"

[AllegroNg]

"Nope. Keep guessing."

[lapietra]

"Dave's not here."

[nycwriters]

We ate him."

[Zyle]

He tasted like

[nycwriters]

chicken, but more

[Panda]

like glazed snake

[AllegroNg]

." "Dave sounds delicous!"

[chuckie egg]

"mmm ...I know!"

[AllegroNg]

"Got any left-overs??

[surflugen]

Just these Dave-fingers.

[AllegroNg]

" "Are they crunchy?"

[cosmo949]

No, rather underdone

[jbisdaman]

and too salty

[Indigo]

probably because of

[wickedcanobeans]

the time it was buried in that barrel of salt.

[jbisdaman]

I take that

[wickedcanobeans]

as a threat.

[Indigo]

And fully intend

[wickedcanobeans]

to get you

[zenbabe]

a malibu barbie

[wickedcanobeans]

with free lipgloss.

[Indigo]

One day, you

[1kookykat]

won't be so

[cosmo949]

quick to dismiss

[Indigo]

my premonititive powers!

[wickedcanobeans]

However, you may

[cosmo949]

scratch my itch

[wickedcanobeans]

and feed my

[cosmo949]

collection of phobias

[Indigo]

the worst being

[1kookykat]

an irrational loathing

[cosmo949]

of talking heads

[Indigo]

from Spanish countries.

[wickedcanobeans]

We all thought

[1kookykat]

disco was dead

[AllegroNg]

because my clogs

[1kookykat]

were in hock

[wickedcanobeans]

of being denied.

[Indigo]

This only happens

[1kookykat]

to two people:

[Indigo]

Me, and the

[1kookykat]

Pope. Oops, my

[AllegroNg]

blonde! I ate

[noxxville]

my neighbor's red

[1kookykat]

m&m's without even

[cosmo949]

considering the green

[Indigo]

taste much better.

[AllegroNg]

The M&M's stared

[1kookykat]

a hole through

[noxxville]

my shiny new

[Panda]

ferrari 250's hood

[noxxville]

ornament. "Crap!" I

[Indigo]

really liked that...

[1kookykat]

Charo statuette. Now

[noxxville]

I am forced

[cosmo949]

to recreate the

[1kookykat]

Battle of Hastings.

[noxxville]

First, I'll need

[cosmo949]

to freshen up

[1kookykat]

my Tanqueray and

[Indigo]

get some cheese!

[noxxville]

After three stiff

[nycwriters]

shots of whiskey.

[1kookykat]

"Boogah boogaaahh! They

[noxxville]

screamed out loud.

[nycwriters]

And then embraced

[Indigo]

while sobbing uncontrollably.

[nycwriters]

Lint in the

[noxxville]

stripper's bellybutton distracted

[nycwriters]

him from his

[noxxville]

loose peg leg.

[cosmo949]

"What we have

[Indigo]

here is a

[nycwriters]

stripper without a

[noxxville]

three foot salami."

[AllegroNg]

"Are those real?"

[nycwriters]

"I should slap

[ProfessionalGun]

them and see."

[Indigo]

"Yep, they're real."

[noxxville]

"No slap necessary"

[AllegroNg]

"I love jiggling

[nycwriters]

and making room

[noxxville]

for zeMonkey merchandise

[ProfessionalGun]

in my shoe.

[Indigo]

Some day, I

[ProfessionalGun]

will un-tie it

[Indigo]

only to find

[1kookykat]

my Special Purpose.

[Indigo]

Kooky came home,

[noxxville]

and smeared butter

[nycwriters]

on some bread

[deriasys]

, pored some tea,

[rmr]

grabbed the paper

[ProfessionalGun]

and ate it.

[noxxville]

Suddenly a flying

[1kookykat]

upside-down-M

[deriasys]

came crashing through

[rmr]

her soft heart

[xerocs]

the doctors tried

[zenbabe]

to revive her

[rmr]

and were surprised

[ProfessionalGun]

by two v's

[noxxville]

sewn into her

[nycwriters]

aeorta valve, they

[AllegroNg]

were quite mushy

[noxxville]

for being so

[brightpearl]

red and birdlike.

[Tunesmith]

After the operation,

[Jack Flanders]

she still died.

[Marcus Bales]

Her soul fluttered

[T.I.P.]

above the scene

[brightpearl]

, an unmoored boat,

[Tunesmith]

in a sea

[T.I.P.]

of lava, surrounded

[brightpearl]

by tiny demons

[Hyakujo's Fox]

each one busily

[Jack Flanders]

creating holy hell

[Tunesmith]

for the souls

[T.I.P.]

who happen to

[brightpearl]

look their way.

[Veruki]

If only they

[Tunesmith]

would slow down

[Bman]

and smell the

[Tunesmith]

burning gasoline and

[T.I.P.]

vapor fumes emanating

[Marcus Bales]

from the big

[Tunesmith]

washed up whale.

[Jack Flanders]

But the seagull

[T.I.P.]

oblivious to the

[Coffee]

scent feasted lustily

[Tunesmith]

on the bodies

[T.I.P.]

slowly decomposing beside

[brightpearl]

my broken nightstand.

[Tunesmith]

Now it was

[Dorkahontas]

up to me

[Tunesmith]

to stop the

[Hyakujo's Fox]

neighbours finding out.

[Brynn]

If only I

[T.I.P.]

had not left

[lukkucairi]

oh why did

[Tunesmith]

that technicolor beast

[Stephi_B]

step out of

[T.I.P.]

the television and

[Stephi_B]

started to play

[brightpearl]

Boards of Canada?

[Tunesmith]

Boards of Canada?

:D

-----------------

The ambient sounds

[T.I.P.]

drifted through its

[lukkucairi]

chromakey dreamcoat and

[T.I.P.]

splattered against a

[lukkucairi]

large rusty wok

[Tunesmith]

filling the air