View Full Version : communal limericks
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Zatoichi
02-16-2006, 09:27 PM
I fear something's wrong with my nose
One nostril's blocked up by two toes
The other is fine
But the toes are not mine
Marcus Bales
02-16-2006, 11:09 PM
I fear something's wrong with my nose
One nostril's blocked up by two toes
The other is fine
But the toes are not mine
And I seem to be missing my clothes.
Marcus Bales
02-16-2006, 11:10 PM
A few other orifices, too
dddrum
02-17-2006, 12:09 PM
A few other orifices, too
Appear to be skewered askew
Hyakujo's Fox
02-18-2006, 11:12 AM
A few other orifices, too
Appear to be skewered askew
By inserted digits
trisherina
02-18-2006, 12:32 PM
A few other orifices, too
Appear to be skewered askew
By inserted digits
By gizmos, and widgets
Marcus Bales
02-20-2006, 12:22 PM
A few other orifices, too
Appear to be skewered askew
By inserted digits
By gizmos, and widgets,
A Frenchman, a Turk, and a Sioux.
Zatoichi
02-20-2006, 01:03 PM
A Frenchman, a Turk, and a Sioux
Vied to see which was the one who
Marcus Bales
02-20-2006, 01:20 PM
A Frenchman, a Turk, and a Sioux
Vied to see which was the one who
Replaced with a digit
The vibrating widget
Zatoichi
02-20-2006, 01:33 PM
A Frenchman, a Turk, and a Sioux
Vied to see which was the one who
Replaced with a digit
The vibrating widget
Which gave such delight to Miss Lou.
Marcus Bales
02-20-2006, 05:43 PM
Miss Lou's eyes rolled back in her head
Zatoichi
02-21-2006, 12:33 PM
Miss Lou's eyes rolled back in her head
As her thighs rolled near off of the bed
dddrum
02-21-2006, 03:04 PM
Miss Lou's eyes rolled back in her head
As her thighs rolled near off of the bed
Her riotous yell
Gave the Frenchman a spell
Marcus Bales
02-21-2006, 03:11 PM
Miss Lou's eyes rolled back in her head
As her thighs rolled near off of the bed
Her riotous yell
Gave the Frenchman a spell
While the Turk on the Sioux just saw red.
Marcus Bales
02-21-2006, 03:13 PM
The Sioux turned around on the Turk
Hyakujo's Fox
02-21-2006, 09:18 PM
The Sioux turned around on the Turk
"Just look what you've done now, you jerk!"
Marcus Bales
02-23-2006, 09:40 PM
The Sioux turned around on the Turk
"Just look what you've done now, you jerk!
"The Frenchman's poor digit
"Is stuck in the widget
dddrum
02-24-2006, 11:11 PM
The Sioux turned around on the Turk
"Just look what you've done now, you jerk!
"The Frenchman's poor digit
"Is stuck in the widget
"Any fool can see that just won't work!"
Marcus Bales
02-25-2006, 12:46 AM
The Turk sadly looked at the Sioux
"Well, what do you want me to dioux?
Jack Flanders
02-25-2006, 02:07 AM
The Turk sadly looked at the Sioux,
"Well, what do want me to dioux?"
"Get the French guy's finger,"
trisherina
02-25-2006, 11:38 AM
The Turk sadly looked at the Sioux,
"Well, what do want me to dioux?"
"Get the French guy's finger,"
"Do not tarry nor linger!"
Marcus Bales
02-25-2006, 01:29 PM
The Turk sadly looked at the Sioux,
"Well, what do want me to dioux?"
"Get the French guy's finger,
Do not tarry nor linger
To the hosptial in my canioux!"
Hyakujo's Fox
02-26-2006, 07:10 PM
The nurse looked on our three with disdain
dddrum
02-27-2006, 04:36 AM
The nurse looked on our three with disdain
Whilst muttering phrases profane
Zatoichi
02-27-2006, 12:47 PM
The nurse looked on our three with disdain
Whilst muttering phrases profane
It's one thing for Miss Lou
To be tangled with a Sioux
Marcus Bales
02-28-2006, 01:37 AM
The nurse looked on our three with disdain
Whilst muttering phrases profane
It's one thing for Lou
To be tangling a Sioux
But a Frenchman and Turk? That's insane!
Having squandered my fortune on truffles
Hyakujo's Fox
03-01-2006, 08:44 AM
Having squandered my fortune on truffles
I was confined to bed with the snuffles
Zatoichi
03-01-2006, 11:46 AM
Having squandered my fortune on truffles
I was confined to bed with the snuffles
An allegory to my mood,
Or allergy to this food?
dddrum
03-01-2006, 03:52 PM
Having squandered my fortune on truffles
I was confined to bed with the snuffles
An allegory to my mood,
Or allergy to this food?
Either way, I have had quite enoughles.
Master_Jedi
03-02-2006, 07:59 AM
I ate all the shake an' bake
Marcus Bales
03-02-2006, 10:37 AM
One head of a two-headed calf
Hyakujo's Fox
03-03-2006, 07:01 AM
I ate all the shake an' bake
My stomach does quiver an' quake
One head of a two-headed calf
Was sick of its damned other half
trisherina
03-03-2006, 10:50 AM
I ate all the shake an' bake
My stomach does quiver an' quake
I'm going to throw up
One head of a two-headed calf
Was sick of its damned other half
It called for a saw
Zatoichi
03-03-2006, 01:36 PM
I ate all the shake an' bake
My stomach does quiver an' quake
I'm going to throw up
All over the grownups
One head of a two-headed calf
Was sick of its damned other half
It called for a saw
And laid down the law
Marcus Bales
03-04-2006, 05:07 PM
I ate all the shake an' bake
My stomach does quiver an' quake
I'm going to throw up
All over the grownups --
I get the attention I take.
One head of a two-headed calf
Was sick of its damned other half
It called for a saw
And laid down the law
But his twin had their heart -- and last laugh.
Marcus Bales
03-04-2006, 05:09 PM
I knew that you knew that I knew
I knew that you knew that I knew
'bout my day trip to Solla Sollew
Marcus Bales
03-05-2006, 10:18 AM
I knew that you knew that I knew
'bout my day trip to Solla Sollew
but I didn't care
'cause everyone there
I knew that you knew that I knew
'bout my day trip to Solla Sollew
but I didn't care
'cause everyone there
were attending Taming of the Shrew
trisherina
03-05-2006, 09:23 PM
I wonder if anyone knows
Marcus Bales
03-05-2006, 09:32 PM
I wonder if anyone knows
Where "The World's Worst Joke" thread goes
Hyakujo's Fox
03-06-2006, 10:41 AM
I wonder if anyone knows
Where "The World's Worst Joke" thread goes
I blame Melvil Dewey
Marcus Bales
03-07-2006, 03:13 PM
I wonder if anyone knows
Where "The World's Worst Joke" thread goes
I blame Melvil Dewey
You blame Melvil who-ey?
Hyakujo's Fox
03-07-2006, 09:00 PM
I wonder if anyone knows
Where "The World's Worst Joke" thread goes
I blame Melvil Dewey
You blame Melvil who-ey?
You know - that decimal system just blows
Marcus Bales
03-07-2006, 09:27 PM
That's not Melvil Dewey -- that's John!
Hyakujo's Fox
03-07-2006, 10:11 PM
That's not Melvil Dewey -- that's John!
I think you'll find Melvil's the one
I checked all of the facts
'bout who ordered those stacks
And John was nowhere to be fo'nd
Brynn
03-07-2006, 10:13 PM
Pish posh! It's time for dessert!
Pish posh! It's time for dessert!
I can't imagine this cheesecake will hurt
Marcus Bales
03-08-2006, 09:53 AM
Pish posh! It's time for dessert!
I can't think this cheesecake will hurt
I smile as it slips
Past my lips to my hips
dddrum
03-08-2006, 10:03 AM
Pish posh! It's time for dessert!
I can't think this cheesecake will hurt
I smile as it slips
Past my lips to my hips
(Note to Self: Time to buy a new skirt)
Marcus Bales
03-08-2006, 05:50 PM
Dewey dwell on the fact that I'm wrong?
Dewey dwell on the fact that I'm wrong?
Or shall we instead sing a nice children's song?
Marcus Bales
03-09-2006, 02:36 PM
Dewey dwell on the fact that I'm wrong?
Or instead sing a nice children's song?
The song might be nice
Dewey dwell on the fact that I'm wrong?
Or instead sing a nice children's song?
The song might be nice
If it has blinded mice
dinzdale
03-09-2006, 06:03 PM
Dewey dwell on the fact that I'm wrong?
Or instead sing a nice children's song?
The song might be nice
If it has blinded mice
or a caterpillar with a bong
Zatoichi
03-09-2006, 09:47 PM
The real Cinderalla's step-sissahs
Removed their huge toes with a scizzahs
dinzdale
03-10-2006, 05:39 PM
The real Cinderalla's step-sissahs
Removed their huge toes with a scizzahs
and pierce their bits
LeahDear
03-11-2006, 01:47 PM
and played with their tits
Hyakujo's Fox
03-12-2006, 10:06 AM
The real Cinderalla's step-sissahs
Removed their huge toes with a scizzahs
and pierce their bits
and played with their tits
but weren't highly rated as kissers
Marcus Bales
03-12-2006, 11:58 AM
Those dwarves had it good with Snow White
trisherina
03-12-2006, 12:28 PM
Those dwarves had it good with Snow White
Whose bark was as sweet as her bite
Marcus Bales
03-12-2006, 01:03 PM
Those dwarves had it good with Snow White
Whose bark was as sweet as her bite
She danced and she sang
Those dwarves had it good with Snow White
Whose bark was as sweet as her bite
She danced and she sang
As the dinner bell rang
Marcus Bales
03-13-2006, 09:58 AM
Those dwarves had it good with Snow White
Whose bark was as sweet as her bite
She danced and she sang
As the dinner bell rang
And a whole other tune all the night.
Marcus Bales
03-13-2006, 11:25 AM
That princess who slept on a pea
That princess who slept on a pea
Complained of a bite from a flea
Zatoichi
03-14-2006, 12:23 PM
That princess who slept on a pea
Complained of a bite from a flea
But when she got licked
She favored the tick
Marcus Bales
03-18-2006, 09:47 AM
That princess who slept on a pea
Complained of a bite from a flea
But when she got licked
She favored the tick
To scratching her itches with me.
Hyakujo's Fox
03-18-2006, 10:13 AM
For six months I've been stuck on this isle
For six months I've been stuck on this isle
The rats I've been eating are vile
funkytuba
03-19-2006, 03:31 AM
For six months I've been stuck on this isle
The rats I've been eating are vile
But when chopped and pureed
For six months I've been stuck on this isle
The rats I've been eating are vile
But when chopped and pureed
And with seaweed sauteed
Marcus Bales
03-19-2006, 05:40 PM
For months I've been stuck on this isle
The rats I've been eating are vile
But when chopped and pureed
And with seaweed sauteed
They're vile with a Frenchified style.
Zatoichi
03-20-2006, 03:07 PM
One truffle, one caper, fromage
Marcus Bales
03-21-2006, 01:12 PM
One truffle, one caper, fromage,
A Reisling, a pear, a corsage
Zatoichi
03-21-2006, 02:55 PM
One truffle, one caper, fromage,
A Reisling, a pear, a corsage
Courage to the sticking point?
Marcus Bales
03-21-2006, 09:05 PM
One truffle, one caper, fromage,
A Reisling, a pear, a corsage
Courage to the sticking point?
Tongue to the licking joint!
trisherina
03-22-2006, 01:42 AM
One truffle, one caper, fromage,
A Reisling, a pear, a corsage
Courage to the sticking point?
Tongue to the licking joint!
And if you should fail? Quel dommage!
funkytuba
03-22-2006, 02:54 AM
That last one went over my head
EmotionalVelcro
03-22-2006, 02:01 PM
That last one went over my head
Failed to follow wherever it led
Hyakujo's Fox
03-22-2006, 06:36 PM
That last one went over my head
Failed to follow wherever it led
Allusions so oblique
Marcus Bales
03-22-2006, 07:33 PM
That last one went over my head
Failed to follow wherever it led
Allusions so oblique
Are only faux chic
That last one went over my head
Failed to follow wherever it led
Allusions so oblique
Are only faux chic
I'd rather eat crackers in bed
okay, so sue me
Hyakujo's Fox
03-23-2006, 12:30 AM
The problem bedeviling bed-snackers
The problem bedeviling bed-snackers
Is the crumbs left behind by the crackers
Hyakujo's Fox
03-23-2006, 05:36 AM
The problem bedeviling bed-snackers
Is the crumbs left behind by the crackers
Which attract many mice
LeahDear
03-23-2006, 07:26 AM
The problem bedeviling bed-snackers
Is the crumbs left behind by the crackers
Which attract many mice
and isn't so nice
LeahDear
03-23-2006, 07:28 AM
The problem bedeviling bed-snackers
Is the crumbs left behind by the crackers
Which attract many mice
and isn't so nice
coz sometimes they nibble your knackers
funkytuba
03-24-2006, 03:08 AM
She left me embroiled in a scandal
She left me embroiled in a scandal
When she accused me of being a vandal
EmotionalVelcro
03-24-2006, 11:21 AM
She left me embroiled in a scandal
When she accused me of being a vandal
My "tags" I confess
LeahDear
03-24-2006, 11:26 AM
She left me embroiled in a scandal
When she accused me of being a vandal
My "tags" I confess
Were a terrible mess
EmotionalVelcro
03-24-2006, 03:01 PM
She left me embroiled in a scandal
When she accused me of being a vandal
My "tags" I confess
Were a terrible mess
It was more than the public could handle
funkytuba
03-25-2006, 03:24 AM
It's a sad scene we find ourselves in
LeahDear
03-25-2006, 09:47 AM
It's a sad scene we find ourselves in
Getting caught rooting through the bin
It's a sad scene we find ourselves in
Getting caught rooting through the bin
But one person's trash
EmotionalVelcro
03-25-2006, 02:36 PM
It's a sad scene we find ourselves in
Getting caught rooting through the bin
But one person's trash
Is another one's cash
It's a sad scene we find ourselves in
Getting caught rooting through the bin
But one person's trash
Is another one's cash
And me and my stuff love eBayin'
funkytuba
03-26-2006, 03:49 AM
The left one hangs down a bit more
EmotionalVelcro
03-26-2006, 07:26 AM
The left one hangs down a bit more
The right one sometimes is sore
Marcus Bales
03-26-2006, 10:15 AM
The left one hangs down a bit more
The right one sometimes is sore
Despite the enormities
Of these two deformities
LeahDear
03-27-2006, 07:28 AM
The left one hangs down a bit more
The right one sometimes is sore
Despite the enormities
Of these two deformities
At least they dont drag on the floor
Marcus Bales
03-27-2006, 10:26 AM
A beer-bellied fellow from Dallas
LeahDear
03-27-2006, 10:34 AM
A beer-bellied fellow from Dallas
Had an unfeasibly huge phallus
EmotionalVelcro
03-28-2006, 01:18 PM
A beer-bellied fellow from Dallas
Had an unfeasibly huge phallus
It woulda been better
LeahDear
03-29-2006, 02:47 PM
A beer-bellied fellow from Dallas
Had an unfeasibly huge phallus
It woulda been better
If he'd not read a letter
Zatoichi
03-29-2006, 06:16 PM
A beer-bellied fellow from Dallas
Had an unfeasibly huge phallus
It woulda been better
If he'd not read a letter
Which prompted the growth of a callus.
funkytuba
04-04-2006, 02:53 AM
Does phallus have any more rhymes?
LeahDear
04-04-2006, 05:34 AM
Words and phrases that rhyme with phallus: (31 results)
2 syllables:
alice, balas, ballasts, callace, callous, callus, dallas, dallas', gallus, kallus, kalous, malice, palace, pallas
3 syllables:
daedalus, dance palace, ilalis, ilalis', prothallus
4 syllables:
borealis, digitalis, gallus gallus, genus gallus, picture palace
5 syllables:
vatican palace
6 syllables:
cancer borealis, genus digitalis, vena digitalis
7 syllables:
aurora borealis, corona borealis, lanius borealis
Marcus Bales
04-04-2006, 08:46 AM
Never attribute to malice
funkytuba
04-04-2006, 12:13 PM
Does phallus have any more rhymes?
It seems that it doesn't at times
Never attribute to malice
Those mars on your poor bust of pallas
Hyakujo's Fox
04-06-2006, 12:36 AM
Does phallus have any more rhymes?
It seems that it doesn't at times
Maybe our prudery
Never attribute to malice
Those mars on your poor bust of pallas
Those chips off the block
funkytuba
04-09-2006, 02:04 AM
Does phallus have any more rhymes?
It seems that it doesn't at times
Maybe our prudery
Will inspire us to see
Never attribute to malice
Those mars on your poor bust of pallas.
Those chips off the block
Didn't come from a Glock
trisherina
04-09-2006, 12:07 PM
Does phallus have any more rhymes?
It seems that it doesn't at times
Maybe our prudery
Will inspire us to see
Something new in the use of Cialis.
Never attribute to malice
Those mars on your poor bust of pallas.
Those chips off the block
Didn't come from a Glock;
It fell over when Debbie did Dallas.
I'm sure glad those last two are done !
Hyakujo's Fox
04-10-2006, 09:23 AM
I'm sure glad those last two are done !
cos frankly they were lacking in fun
funkytuba
04-14-2006, 08:25 PM
I'm sure glad those last two are done !
cos frankly they were lacking in fun
But their syllable count
Marcus Bales
04-17-2006, 10:33 PM
I'm sure glad those last two are done !
cos frankly they were lacking in fun
But their syllable count
Had started to mount
Past the thirties and up into "stun".
funkytuba
04-18-2006, 02:31 AM
In a case of cold brewskis a roach
trisherina
04-18-2006, 11:38 AM
In a case of cold brewskis a roach
Made my beat-up Impala a coach
Hyakujo's Fox
04-20-2006, 10:35 PM
In a case of cold brewskis a roach
Made my beat-up Impala a coach
Then this magical bug
Marcus Bales
04-21-2006, 08:22 AM
In a case of cold brewskis a roach
Made my beat-up Impala a coach
Then this magical bug,
With an eloquent shrug,
trisherina
04-21-2006, 11:54 AM
In a case of cold brewskis a roach
Made my beat-up Impala a coach
Then this magical bug,
With an eloquent shrug,
Transformed himself into a brooch.
When I regained consciousness nigh,
Zatoichi
04-21-2006, 12:32 PM
When I regained consciousness nigh,
Nigh on a week had gone by.
funkytuba
04-22-2006, 01:52 AM
When I regained consciousness nigh,
Nigh on a week had gone by.
It was absinthe, not beer
LeahDear
04-22-2006, 06:00 AM
When I regained consciousness nigh,
Nigh on a week had gone by.
It was absinthe, not beer
That made me feel queer
Marcus Bales
04-22-2006, 11:27 AM
When I regained consciousness nigh,
Nigh on a week had gone by.
It was absinthe, not beer
That made me feel queer
And my heart grow so fond of this guy.
I'm out of the closet, and boy!
Zatoichi
04-22-2006, 12:19 PM
I'm out of the closet, and boy!
I'm dancing and shouting for joy
Marcus Bales
04-22-2006, 12:43 PM
I'm out of the closet, and boy!
I'm dancing and shouting for joy
I don't care who knows
trisherina
04-22-2006, 12:47 PM
I'm out of the closet, and boy!
I'm dancing and shouting for joy
I don't care who knows
'Cause I'm coming to blows
Marcus Bales
04-22-2006, 12:54 PM
I'm out of the closet, and boy!
I'm dancing and shouting for joy
I don't care who knows
'Cause I'm coming to blows
In a sense I'd once never employ.
Lizzie's frizzies were clearly a mess
Zatoichi
04-23-2006, 12:44 AM
Lizzie's frizzies were clearly a mess
Liz, in a tizzy, was forced to confess
Lizzie's frizzies were clearly a mess
Liz, in a tizzy, was forced to confess
She'd tried eggs and honey
funkytuba
04-23-2006, 07:35 PM
Lizzie's frizzies were clearly a mess
Liz, in a tizzy, was forced to confess
She'd tried eggs and honey
But still looked quite funny
Lizzie's frizzies were clearly a mess
Liz, in a tizzy, was forced to confess
She'd tried eggs and honey
But still looked quite funny
Much like John Cleese looks in a dress
funkytuba
04-23-2006, 11:59 PM
In my head all the midgets have bunions
l'azizza
04-24-2006, 12:12 AM
In my head all the midgets have bunions
Thankfully they DO NOT smell of onions
funkytuba
04-24-2006, 01:36 AM
In my head all the midgets have bunions
Thankfully they DO NOT smell of onions
A podiatrist's dream
LeahDear
04-24-2006, 09:39 AM
In my head all the midgets have bunions
Thankfully they DO NOT smell of onions
A podiatrist's dream
Has athletes foot cream
trisherina
04-25-2006, 12:15 PM
In my head all the midgets have bunions
Thankfully they DO NOT smell of onions
A podiatrist's dream
Has athletes foot cream
That sadly to say smells like grunions.
jasmina
04-25-2006, 12:49 PM
Tonight I'll be out having fun,
trisherina
04-25-2006, 01:11 PM
Tonight I'll be out having fun,
Doing things that ought not to be done
funkytuba
04-26-2006, 02:18 AM
Tonight I'll be out having fun,
Doing things that ought not to be done
It's so tempting, you see
Hyakujo's Fox
04-29-2006, 12:57 AM
Tonight I'll be out having fun,
Doing things that ought not to be done
It's so tempting, you see
To launch out on a spree
Marcus Bales
04-29-2006, 10:16 AM
Tonight I'll be out having fun,
Doing things that ought not to be done
It's so tempting, you see
To launch out on a spree --
Before the beguine has begun.
Hyakujo's Fox
04-30-2006, 10:58 PM
If Cinderella missed the ball
Marcus Bales
05-03-2006, 09:43 AM
If Cinderella missed the ball
The prince would not have come to call
If Cinderella missed the ball
The prince would not have come to call
And the floors would be clean
Marcus Bales
05-03-2006, 03:31 PM
If Cinderella missed the ball
The prince would not have come to call
And the floors would be clean
And her sisters still mean
LeahDear
05-04-2006, 07:21 AM
If Cinderella missed the ball
The prince would not have come to call
And the floors would be clean
And her sisters still mean
And there'd be no fairytale for us all
Zatoichi
05-04-2006, 08:13 AM
Fairytale endings are lame
Fairytale endings are lame
We just want somebody to blame
dinzdale
05-04-2006, 11:34 AM
Fairytale endings are lame
We just want somebody to blame
happy ever after
LeahDear
05-04-2006, 01:14 PM
Fairytale endings are lame
We just want somebody to blame
happy ever after
makes me cry with laughter
Hyakujo's Fox
05-05-2006, 01:04 AM
Fairytale endings are lame
We just want somebody to blame
happy ever after
makes me cry with laughter
Yet sometimes I still dream just the same
I spit-shine my brass twice a week
helloaimie
05-05-2006, 01:44 PM
I spit-shine my brass twice a week
but a new pastime is what i seek
Sri Rama
05-05-2006, 02:47 PM
I spit-shine my brass twice a week
but a new pastime is what i seek
Perhaps I should knit
I spit-shine my brass twice a week
but a new pastime is what i seek
Perhaps I should knit
A green oven mitt
LeahDear
05-08-2006, 04:05 PM
I spit-shine my brass twice a week
but a new pastime is what i seek
Perhaps I should knit
A green oven mitt
I think I'd look ever so chic
dddrum
05-09-2006, 05:34 PM
I spit-shine my brass twice a week
but a new pastime is what i seek
Perhaps I should knit
A green oven mitt
I think I'd look ever so chic
How stylish, to match one's green oven
Zatoichi
05-09-2006, 08:03 PM
How stylish, to match one's green oven
But the green bird's resistin' my shovin'
Marcus Bales
05-10-2006, 09:04 AM
How stylish, to match one's green oven
But the green bird's resistin' my shovin'
The blue bird is smilin'
LeahDear
05-10-2006, 02:19 PM
How stylish, to match one's green oven
But the green bird's resistin' my shovin'
The blue bird is smilin'
As it's poop keeps on pilin'
Hyakujo's Fox
05-10-2006, 11:12 PM
How stylish, to match one's green oven
But the green bird's resistin' my shovin'
The blue bird is smilin'
As it's poop keeps on pilin'
Which I'd mind if I weren't such a sloven
Marcus Bales
05-11-2006, 07:43 AM
Appearing tonight on our stage
LeahDear
05-11-2006, 07:46 AM
Appearing tonight on our stage
Is a clever and wizened old sage
Appearing tonight on our stage
Is a clever and wizened old sage
He'll speak with a lisp
LeahDear
05-11-2006, 02:19 PM
Appearing tonight on our stage
Is a clever and wizened old sage
He'll speak with a lisp
And his hair's just a wisp
Hyakujo's Fox
05-12-2006, 10:57 AM
Appearing tonight on our stage
Is a clever and wizened old sage
He'll speak with a lisp
And his hair's just a wisp
Combed over so he looks half his age
Marcus Bales
05-13-2006, 11:35 AM
You may think that you are the one
You may think that you are the one
Whose smile is as bright as the sun
Marcus Bales
05-13-2006, 02:16 PM
You may think that you are the one
Whose smile is as bright as the sun
But everyone knows
You may think that you are the one
Whose smile is as bright as the sun
But everyone knows
The reason it glows
LeahDear
05-15-2006, 02:52 PM
You may think that you are the one
Whose smile is as bright as the sun
But everyone knows
The reason it glows
Is you've had too much x-rated fun
Marcus Bales
05-15-2006, 04:21 PM
The new Bishop met with the press
dddrum
05-15-2006, 04:48 PM
The new Bishop met with the press
To clear up the scandalous mess
funkytuba
05-16-2006, 12:56 AM
The new Bishop met with the press
To clear up the scandalous mess,
"Effective today
LeahDear
05-16-2006, 09:25 AM
The new Bishop met with the press
To clear up the scandalous mess,
"Effective today
is the right to convey
Zatoichi
05-16-2006, 05:17 PM
The new Bishop met with the press
To clear up the scandalous mess,
"Effective today
is the right to convey
Absolution, while wearing a dress
Marcus Bales
05-16-2006, 05:32 PM
When a tailor asks "How do you dress?"
Coffee
05-16-2006, 09:27 PM
When a tailor asks "How do you dress?",
respond with "Of course to impress".
LeahDear
05-17-2006, 06:54 AM
When a tailor asks "How do you dress?",
respond with "Of course to impress".
"I'll dress to the right
Zatoichi
05-29-2006, 05:37 AM
When a tailor asks "How do you dress?",
respond with "Of course to impress".
"I'll dress to the right
if the pants aren't too tight,
and at attention, if they lightly caress"
LeahDear
05-29-2006, 08:25 AM
The night of seduction was set
Marcus Bales
05-29-2006, 06:06 PM
The night of seduction was set
Except for a few things to get:
The dwarf and bow tie,
Zatoichi
05-29-2006, 07:55 PM
The night of seduction was set
Except for a few things to get:
The dwarf and bow tie,
The prefab alibi
LeahDear
06-06-2006, 03:56 PM
The night of seduction was set
Except for a few things to get:
The dwarf and bow tie,
The prefab alibi
And the dildo that's shaped like a jet
"Aha" she proclaimed with a snort
LeahDear
06-06-2006, 04:36 PM
"Aha" she proclaimed with a snort
"You like to shoot donkeys for sport."
"Aha" she proclaimed with a snort
"You like to shoot donkeys for sport."
"Which makes you the ass..."
LeahDear
06-06-2006, 04:43 PM
"Aha" she proclaimed with a snort
"You like to shoot donkeys for sport."
"Which makes you the ass..."
"You stupid dumb lass..."
Hooter
06-09-2006, 10:23 PM
"Aha" she proclaimed with a snort
"You like to shoot donkeys for sport."
"Which makes you the ass..."
"You stupid dumb lass..."
"And I'll see your big butt in court."
Hooter
06-09-2006, 10:32 PM
"When asked for favors, she said,"
Marcus Bales
06-11-2006, 10:55 AM
When asked for favors, she said
"With you? Hah! I'd rather be dead!"
When asked for favors, she said
"With you? Hah! I'd rather be dead!"
"Or stung by a bee"
When asked for favors, she said
"With you? Hah! I'd rather be dead!"
"Or stung by a bee"
"We're through you and me!"
When asked for favors, she said
"With you? Hah! I'd rather be dead!"
"Or stung by a bee"
"We're through you and me!"
"I despise every hair on your head."
Marcus Bales
06-12-2006, 01:14 PM
Whenever I walk in the Mall
Whenever I walk in the Mall
I bounce my big red rubber ball
LeahDear
06-12-2006, 04:44 PM
Whenever I walk in the Mall
I bounce my big red rubber ball
but the staff aren't amused
Whenever I walk in the Mall
I bounce my big red rubber ball
but the staff aren't amused
at my attempts to confuse
dddrum
06-13-2006, 04:53 AM
Whenever I walk in the Mall
I bounce my big red rubber ball
but the staff aren't amused
at my attempts to confuse
In fact, they bounce off of the wall
Marcus Bales
06-13-2006, 10:06 AM
The seagulls are riding the air
dddrum
06-13-2006, 05:27 PM
The seagulls are riding the air
As I laze in my 'luminum chair
Marcus Bales
06-13-2006, 09:14 PM
The seagulls are riding the air
As I laze in my 'luminum chair
I sit and I drink
Jack Flanders
06-13-2006, 09:45 PM
The seagulls are riding the air
As I laze in my 'luminum chair
I sit and I drink
And try not to think
The seagulls are riding the air
As I laze in my 'luminum chair
I sit and I drink
And try not to think
Which for me is a simple affair
Marcus Bales
06-13-2006, 10:16 PM
The seagulls are riding the air
As I laze in my 'luminum chair
I sit and I drink
And try not to think
Of what started the sordid affair.
Hyakujo's Fox
06-13-2006, 11:05 PM
The crashing of waves from the sea
The crashing of waves from the sea,
flooded the hull full of chai sweet tea.
LeahDear
06-15-2006, 06:12 AM
The crashing of waves from the sea,
flooded the hull full of chai sweet tea.
And the sailors they cried
The crashing of waves from the sea,
flooded the hull full of chai sweet tea.
And the sailors they cried
"Where's our Lipton?" they sighed
Marcus Bales
06-15-2006, 11:38 AM
The crashing of waves from the sea,
flooded the hull full of chai sweet tea.
And the sailors they cried
"Where's our Lipton?" they sighed --
But none there sighed deeper than me.
LeahDear
06-15-2006, 03:34 PM
The party kicked off with a bang
Marcus Bales
06-15-2006, 03:36 PM
The party kicked off with a bang
Bill danced, and then Hillary sang
LeahDear
06-15-2006, 03:37 PM
The party kicked off with a bang
Bill danced, and then Hillary sang
out came the cigar
Marcus Bales
06-15-2006, 03:40 PM
The party kicked off with a bang
Bill danced, and then Hillary sang
out came the cigar
that had gone in too far
LeahDear
06-15-2006, 04:10 PM
The party kicked off with a bang
Bill danced, and then Hillary sang
out came the cigar
that had gone in too far
how she felt the loss with a pang
Marcus Bales
06-15-2006, 04:46 PM
He swept off the desk with his arm
LeahDear
06-15-2006, 04:50 PM
He swept off the desk with his arm
and said with his Arkansas charm
Marcus Bales
06-15-2006, 04:52 PM
He swept off the desk with his arm
and said with his Arkansas charm
"Ah'll make us some room
LeahDear
06-15-2006, 04:53 PM
He swept off the desk with his arm
and said with his Arkansas charm
"Ah'll make us some room
You're on top I presume?"
Marcus Bales
06-15-2006, 05:01 PM
He swept off the desk with his arm
and said with his Arkansas charm
"Ah'll make us some room
You're on top I presume?
And hurry! I hear the alarm!"
LeahDear
06-15-2006, 05:29 PM
He swept off the desk with his arm
and said with his Arkansas charm
"Ah'll make us some room
You're on top I presume?
And hurry! I hear the alarm!"
"But we've still got to use this cigar"
Marcus Bales
06-15-2006, 05:34 PM
He swept off the desk with his arm
and said with his Arkansas charm
"Ah'll make us some room
You're on top I presume?
And hurry! I hear the alarm!"
"But we've still got to use this cigar"
"Oh, fvck the cigar!" -- and bizarre
LeahDear
06-15-2006, 05:37 PM
He swept off the desk with his arm
and said with his Arkansas charm
"Ah'll make us some room
You're on top I presume?
And hurry! I hear the alarm!"
"But we've still got to use this cigar"
"Oh, fvck the cigar!" -- and bizarre
She locked all the doors
And got down on all fours
Marcus Bales
06-15-2006, 05:42 PM
He swept off the desk with his arm
and said with his Arkansas charm
"Ah'll make us some room
You're on top I presume?
And hurry! I hear the alarm!"
"But we've still got to use this cigar"
"Oh, fvck the cigar!" -- and bizarre
She locked all the doors
And got down on all fours
And considered: Enquirer? or Starr?
LeahDear
06-16-2006, 08:51 AM
He swept off the desk with his arm
and said with his Arkansas charm
"Ah'll make us some room
You're on top I presume?
And hurry! I hear the alarm!"
"But we've still got to use this cigar"
"Oh, fvck the cigar!" -- and bizarre
She locked all the doors
And got down on all fours
And considered: Enquirer? or Starr?
Which ever one pays me the most
Marcus Bales
06-16-2006, 08:54 AM
He swept off the desk with his arm
and said with his Arkansas charm
"Ah'll make us some room
You're on top I presume?
And hurry! I hear the alarm!"
"But we've still got to use this cigar"
"Oh, fvck the cigar!" -- and bizarre
She locked all the doors
And got down on all fours
And considered: Enquirer? or Starr?
Which ever one pays me the most --
Maybe the Washington Post? --
Be that as it may
All I've got to say
Is either way, this guy is toast.
LeahDear
06-16-2006, 09:00 AM
He swept off the desk with his arm
and said with his Arkansas charm
"Ah'll make us some room
You're on top I presume?
And hurry! I hear the alarm!"
"But we've still got to use this cigar"
"Oh, fvck the cigar!" -- and bizarre
She locked all the doors
And got down on all fours
And considered: Enquirer? or Starr?
Which ever one pays me the most --
Maybe the Washington Post? --
Be that as it may
All I've got to say
Is either way, this guy is toast
But of course he denied the affair
Marcus Bales
06-16-2006, 09:06 AM
He swept off the desk with his arm
and said with his Arkansas charm
"Ah'll make us some room
You're on top I presume?
And hurry! I hear the alarm!"
"But we've still got to use this cigar"
"Oh, fvck the cigar!" -- and bizarre
She locked all the doors
And got down on all fours
And considered: Enquirer? or Starr?
Which ever one pays me the most --
Maybe the Washington Post? --
Be that as it may
All I've got to say
Is either way, this guy is toast
But of course he denied the affair --
They always do, don't they? -- and there
LeahDear
06-16-2006, 09:16 AM
He swept off the desk with his arm
and said with his Arkansas charm
"Ah'll make us some room
You're on top I presume?
And hurry! I hear the alarm!"
"But we've still got to use this cigar"
"Oh, fvck the cigar!" -- and bizarre
She locked all the doors
And got down on all fours
And considered: Enquirer? or Starr?
Which ever one pays me the most --
Maybe the Washington Post? --
Be that as it may
All I've got to say
Is either way, this guy is toast
But of course he denied the affair --
They always do, don't they? -- and there
The scandal broke loose
Marcus Bales
06-17-2006, 11:41 AM
He swept off the desk with his arm
and said with his Arkansas charm
"Ah'll make us some room
You're on top I presume?
And hurry! I hear the alarm!"
"But we've still got to use this cigar"
"Oh, fvck the cigar!" -- and bizarre
She locked all the doors
And got down on all fours
And considered: Enquirer? or Starr?
Which ever one pays me the most --
Maybe the Washington Post? --
Be that as it may
All I've got to say
Is either way, this guy is toast
But of course he denied the affair --
They always do, don't they? -- and there
The scandal broke loose
And world-wide abuse
Was heaped on the diddling pair.
LeahDear
06-19-2006, 07:47 AM
He swept off the desk with his arm
and said with his Arkansas charm
"Ah'll make us some room
You're on top I presume?
And hurry! I hear the alarm!"
"But we've still got to use this cigar"
"Oh, fvck the cigar!" -- and bizarre
She locked all the doors
And got down on all fours
And considered: Enquirer? or Starr?
Which ever one pays me the most --
Maybe the Washington Post? --
Be that as it may
All I've got to say
Is either way, this guy is toast
But of course he denied the affair --
They always do, don't they? -- and there
The scandal broke loose
And world-wide abuse
Was heaped on the diddling pair.
So the outcome of this tale is grim
If only he'd acted more prim
He lost his position
And worse, in addition,
His wife's more successful than him
funkytuba
06-22-2006, 02:22 AM
Can we finally talk about Texans?
Brynn
06-22-2006, 11:13 PM
Can we finally talk about Texans?
About Bush? And all his inflections?
LeahDear
06-24-2006, 08:49 AM
Can we finally talk about Texans?
About Bush? And all his inflections?
There's so much to say
Can we finally talk about Texans?
About Bush? And all his inflections?
There's so much to say
It could take all day
(oops, sorry how did I missed that...)
Can we finally talk about Texans?
About Bush? And all his inflections?
There's so much to say,
It could take all day,
let's start with the story, he's gay!
george was a monkey they say,
nycwriters
06-25-2006, 04:04 AM
george was a monkey they say
but his day job got in the way
Ze Frank
06-25-2006, 06:20 PM
Can we finally talk about Texans?
About Bush? And all his inflections?
There's so much to say
It could take all day
Especially the buying of elections
Ze Frank
06-25-2006, 06:22 PM
george was a monkey they say
but his day job got in the way
he thought he was cool
dddrum
06-25-2006, 07:08 PM
george was a monkey they say
but his day job got in the way
he thought he was cool
that curious fool
Ze Frank
06-25-2006, 08:04 PM
george was a monkey they say
but his day job got in the way
he thought he was cool
that curious fool
cuz he ate bananas for lunch every day
Hyakujo's Fox
06-26-2006, 01:46 AM
He sits all alone in his attic
He sits all alone in his attic,
which is typically democratic.
Marcus Bales
06-26-2006, 10:09 AM
He sits all alone in his attic,
which is typically democratic
and rocks as he croons
unpopular tunes
while the radio hisses its static.
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