REUNION!

[Smartypants]

Originally posted by nycwriters
I'm actually afraid to read through this in its entirety.

Wise girl. Be afraid. Be very afraid. hehehe :p

[Smartypants]

Originally posted by Willow Sylph
DO NOT listen to her, Dinz! Remember - tough love. Tough love....

Yes, remember the words of Nick Lowe, "You've got to be cruel to be kind."

We love you, Mags. But we will not be enablers!

BTW, glad to see you up and about!! :D

[Spicy Jack]

4 days.

[Smartypants]

Originally posted by Spicy Jack
4 days.

I read today that the governor of Nevada got wind of your trip and has asked the president to call in the National Guard.

[Spicy Jack]

I have a bail bond.

[daverbee]

Have fun, wish I could be there, Klynne has my phone # if y'all want to do a drunk dial...

[Spicy Jack]

Don't forget sunscreen:

Las Vegas, NV:

Fri
Jun 11 Sunny 96°/70°

Sat
Jun 12 Sunny 99°/71°

Sun
Jun 13 Sunny 99°/72°

Mon
Jun 14 Sunny 100°/72°

[Smartypants]

Originally posted by Spicy Jack
I have a bail bond.

I think when it was originally suggested that everyone get together for a bonding experience, this was not exactly the intention!!

[daverbee]

Probably not, but it makes the whole experience that much more entertaining...

[red]

Originally posted by daverbee
Have fun, wish I could be there, Klynne has my phone # if y'all want to do a drunk dial...

Oh, we've done that before. I'm sure beale will remember us calling him from at 2 or 3 am, druuuuunk!

[bealeblues]

i do remember.

beware, non-attending monkeys, beware.

(what was your number again sparty?)

[Willow Sylph]

Originally posted by Spicy Jack
Don't forget sunscreen:

Las Vegas, NV:

Fri
Jun 11 Sunny 96°/70°

Sat
Jun 12 Sunny 99°/71°

Sun
Jun 13 Sunny 99°/72°

Mon
Jun 14 Sunny 100°/72°
Oh lawdy, lawdy! Everyone be sure to drink A LOT of water this week! Especially if you plan on indulging on the drinky-poo's.

[lapietra]

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by Spicy Jack
Don't forget sunscreen:
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Who's going to be outside during the day?
:confused: Not me. :cool:

[Spicy Jack]

i'm thinking we get back to the hotel around 6-7am, sleep a bit, wake up, drink more and pass out by the pool, wake up and start again.

[lapietra]

Originally posted by Spicy Jack
i'm thinking we get back to the hotel around 6-7am, sleep a bit, wake up, drink more and pass out by the pool, wake up and start again.

Nope - no pools for me... but you can go ;)

[Spicy Jack]

yes

[Klynne]

Originally posted by Spicy Jack
i'm thinking we get back to the hotel around 6-7am, sleep a bit, wake up, drink more and pass out by the pool, wake up and start again.

I will join you at the pool. Sounds like a plan.

[Klynne]

Here is a map of the strip:

http://www.vegas.com/map.html

[Smartypants]

Hey, monkeys! Greetings again from the reuning Vegas monkeys!

I apologize for not reporting for awhile on the goings on here in the desert. To be truthful, I had to excuse myself from the group for a short period to preserve both my sanity and the new friendships we've forged over the past few months. I've only started to get to know these guys (and you who have been holding the fort online while we galavant in Fun Town) since February, and I really, really like everyone, and that's why when the trouble started and the monkeys' dark sides started to emerge, I felt it would be better to simply remove myself from the situation, rather than just grit my teeth, say nothing, and then think bad thoughts about my new friends.

The major trouble was with Willow, who holds a special place in my heart, because we really bonded during the last few weeks leading up to the trip. That's why when she started with her wheedling and snide comments it was especially shocking. As I've told you, most of us -- Spicy especially -- really pack away the alcohol, and with the exception of Beale and Dinz are generally good-natured drunks. Maybe with all the boozing and seemingly benign ribbing that was going on, I wasn't tuning in to the low bass-line grumbling from Willow.

Now I realize that the problems really began shortly after Lala, Willow and Spicy left L.A., and by the time they hit Barstow, the SoCal trio were barely civil to each other.

They drove here in Lala's little Nissan, and Lala brought her CDs, having first checked with Spicy to see if there would be any clash of musical tastes. Spicy said (quite truthfully) that she liked pretty much anything, but Willow, trying to be polite and accommodating also said there was really no music she didn't like. She didn't know that Lala's CD player was going to get stuck and play the one song she really hated over and over and over.

What made matters worse, is that Lala has this rule that whoever is driving gets to pick what plays, and before the stereo malfunctioned, she had already played her Kirsty MacColl albums a few times. One of them was in the player when it started its incessant repeating, which was just after the girls stopped in Victorville so that Willow could take her turn behind the wheel. Willow was so looking forward to loading up her "Cowgirls of Country" CD with her favorite of favoritest song on it, "How Can I Get Over You When You're All Over Me?"and not have to politely sit through any more of Kirsty McC and pretend that Lala's music choices pleased her.

Long story short, by the time they tumbled out of the car in front of the Sahara, they had heard McColl sing "In These Shoes?" like a bazillion times. Lala didn't seem to mind, but Spicy was in a nearly vegetative state. Willow thought she was having a seizure until she realized that she had simply zoned out, head thrown back, without first bothering to wipe the remnants of her cheese sandwich from her lips. Willow saw the melted cheddar that had crusted at the corners of her mouth and the beads of perspiration on her forehead and assumed the worst.

She tried to shake Spicy into consciousness, and Spicy, who was simply having a dream about melted Gruyere, awoke with a start, and in the heat, with Kirsty blaring from the speakers, mistook the ashen Willow for a piece of bread and skewered her with a pencil that she had dreamt was a fondue fork.

After that, Willow was really bitter. Whenever Lala suggested any activities, or asked if Willow wanted to go somewhere, Willow would say, really sarcasticly, imitating Kirsty McColl,"In these shoes?!"

Lala: "Willow, you want to go get lunch at the buffet?

Willow: "In these shoes?!"

Lala: ""Wil, how about we enter the slot tournament this afternoon?"

Willow: "In these shoes?!"

Lala: If you're gonna keep ragging on me, you can just go fark yourself!"

Willow: "In these shoes?!"

After a day or two of this, everyone was irritable.

That's why I decided to go off on my own and don't really know what else has been happening. Although this morning Lala promised to take the car in and have the CD player disconnected and use her vast keno winnings to buy a boombox and lots of batteries for the trip back, and she even bought Willow Volumes One and Two of "Ten-four Good Buddy! CBers' Most Requested Country Hits," with in-between-song commentary by Jerry Springer, and she told Willow that she can be in charge of the music, even when she's not driving.

I guess the storm between them has passed, because instead of responding to Lala's olive branch with "In these shoes?!" Willow actually said "Thank you." and her charming smile that so delights us returned to her face.

We're off to the Bourbon Street casino tonight to see Zamora the Torture King do his show, "Shock!" Apparently he opens his own belly with a scalpel and shows the audience what he had for lunch. Spicy heard he really loves nachos, and I don't think telling her that we would rather go see the other Bourbon Street lounge show, "Hypnolarious, with Dogie the Hypno-Pup" was really an option.

Later, fellow monkeys...

[red]

Originally posted by lapietra
Nope - no pools for me... but you can go ;)

The only pool I'm going around has felt on it.

[daverbee]

Smarty, that was the funniest thing I've read in a long time! Thanks for keeping us up to date!

:D :D :D :D :D :D :D

[Smartypants]

I'm glad you're enjoying it, because it's terribly inconvenient (and often quite costly) to be constantly leaving the craps table in the middle of a hot streak to run to the Internet cafe and file a story every time Spicy smells nachos.

But I took on this role of Reunion Chronicler, and I will not shirk my duties!

;)

[topcat]

you, you're good you. yes you are ,you you're very good

[Magpie]

Originally posted by Smartypants
Yes, remember the words of Nick Lowe, "You've got to be cruel to be kind."

We love you, Mags. But we will not be enablers!

BTW, glad to see you up and about!! :D
Sure you are... don't patronize me damn it.

[Smartypants]

Originally posted by Magpie
Sure you are... don't patronize me damn it.

I understand that you're angry now, but the doctors told us that that's to be expected.

[Willow Sylph]

Originally posted by red
The only pool I'm going around has felt on it. Yaaay! Another billiards fan! We'll have to play a couple of games together while we're there, red. :)

[lapietra]

Originally posted by red
The only pool I'm going around has felt on it.

WOO-HOOO! Me & red & Donovan are going to be spending a *lot* more time together on this trip ;)

Smarty:

a) Spicy's driving.

b) I don't have a car stereo (it was stolen & I've never bothered to replace it).

c) The two K. MacColl albums I have are 'Kite' and the last one, which I bought when she died, listened to once & didn't care for, so I only really listen to 'Kite'.

d) I'm taking your story really, *really* seriously.

Q: Which one of the above statements is NOT TRUE (i.e., FALSE)?
:D

[Spicy Jack]

C

[Willow Sylph]

I just wanted to take this opportunity to thank Lala again for Volumes One and Two of "Ten-four Good Buddy! CBers' Most Requested Country Hits." OMG - it's wonderful!! And to anyone else who appreciates great music, I'd be more than happy to burn a copy of these CD's for you! Note: Track 4 of Vol. 1 - "She Left With My Heart and My Dog, Boone" is a heartbreakingly thought-provoking ballad that all y'all are sure to love!

[Smartypants]

Originally posted by lapietra
The two K. MacColl albums I have are 'Kite' and the last one, which I bought when she died, listened to once & didn't care for, so I only really listen to 'Kite'.

Well ain't that the pity!! :rolleyes:

I didn't realize you had no musical reference (http://www.pacedesign.com/miscpix-n-stuff/InTheseShoes.mp3) for my story!

:cool: :cool: :cool:

[lapietra]

Originally posted by Smartypants
Well ain't that the pity!! :rolleyes:

I didn't realize you had no musical reference (http://www.pacedesign.com/miscpix-n-stuff/InTheseShoes.mp3) for my story!

:cool: :cool: :cool:

I have heard the song :p It's good! :D Not my favorite tho'. I like the songs on 'Kite' better...
It's a very "girly" album... :D :D :D

[Klynne]

Three more days! Whooo, hooo. I have packed already.

What time is everyone getting in again?

I will be in at 10:41 a.m. Friday.

[Spicy Jack]

we (lala, willow and I) should be in around 2:30ish. we are leaving at 10 and it takes about 4 hoursish to get there.

[Klynne]

Originally posted by Spicy Jack
we (lala, willow and I) should be in around 2:30ish. we are leaving at 10 and it takes about 4 hoursish to get there.

Give me a call when you girls get into town!