**Malarkey's Thread**

[malarkey]

Originally posted by zero
here mcclarkie
http://www.adamscandy.com/Images/Products/bigImg/red%20vines.jpg

no one need know

oh that is so cool!!! how can i do pictures like that!!!? thank you for my red vines. i can almost taste them!!! i would probably be allowed a half of one.

[zefrank]

hows the probation going? seems like you have a fair number of visitors.

[malarkey]

yay!!! ze!!! hello!!! how are you? do you have any other pets? how tall are you? do you like pizza? do you like red vines? have you got a car? you are my first boyfriend arent you? i love you!!!

[malarkey]

and when do i get off probabtion?

[Willow Sylph]

Originally posted by lapietra
No... it's not fair because malarkey can't post anywhere else & we have the whole board to post on... so I don't think it's cool... :( There was a reason he was "restricted" to this thread, Miss Nicepants.

[malarkey]

Originally posted by Willow Sylph
There was a reason he was "restricted" to this thread, Miss Nicepants.

hello wilow!!! how are you!!!

[malarkey]

this is the new letter

Dear Blake,

I know i probably freaked you out by telling you that thing that i told you about me being GAY. But it doesnt mean that i am a different person, i still love you but not in a sexy way and you are still my best friend and i wish we could go to the movies still and play i command you to stop stop stop with the traffic lights still and i nearly tried smoking the other day but i didn't because we promised we would do it together. i tried to call you but your mom said you werent there and i know you were. remember when you did that nasty thing when we used to go to school and everyone stopped talking to you and wiping their boogers on you when you walked past. i didn't stop being your friend did i? I still stood by you and i even hit tom white when he kicked you and i got a bloody nose and my dad grounded me but i didnt care because you were my friend. and now you arent and it makes me real sad.

please be my friend again Blake. you are the only one who understands me. i got so much to tell you about all these new friends i have made on the internet. they are all really nice apart from the bee one and the god one and they are all quite old as well so they have really good advice. i have even got my own list with my name on it and the man who runs it even spoke to me. you would love it blake and maybe you could even join in too.

ok thats it. you-ness me-ness us-ness together-ness remember?

love from Mark x

[rmr]

Originally posted by lapietra
I'm sorry - I shouldn't have told you what to do - I should have worded it differently. It's really just my opinion. Do what you like, Miz Rootie - you know I loves ya. ;)


no worries miss lala -- as a dear old man by the name of brother dinz once said "opinions are like arseholes, everyone's got one" ;)

[Willow Sylph]

That's better. Good luck, Malarkey.

[malarkey]

thank you. ive got to go now but ill be back later!!! bye xxx

[lapietra]

Originally posted by malarkey
this is the new letter

Dear Blake,

I know i probably freaked you out by telling you that thing that i told you about me being GAY. But it doesnt mean that i am a different person, i still love you but not in a sexy way and you are still my best friend and i wish we could go to the movies still and play i command you to stop stop stop with the traffic lights still and i nearly tried smoking the other day but i didn't because we promised we would do it together. i tried to call you but your mom said you werent there and i know you were. remember when you did that nasty thing when we used to go to school and everyone stopped talking to you and wiping their boogers on you when you walked past. i didn't stop being your friend did i? I still stood by you and i even hit tom white when he kicked you and i got a bloody nose and my dad grounded me but i didnt care because you were my friend. and now you arent and it makes me real sad.

please be my friend again Blake. you are the only one who understands me. i got so much to tell you about all these new friends i have made on the internet. they are all really nice apart from the bee one and the god one and they are all quite old as well so they have really good advice. i have even got my own list with my name on it and the man who runs it even spoke to me. you would love it blake and maybe you could even join in too.

ok thats it. you-ness me-ness us-ness together-ness remember?

love from Mark x

I like it all except the capitalization of the word "GAY". But I'm sure you have a good reason for it ;)

[trisherina]

Originally posted by malarkey
i didnt mean to upset you. did i upset you? i didnt mean to. sometimes i do that and i dont know i am doing that so you just have to tell me what i do wrong and then i can know and i can not do it again. sorry.
You didn't upset me. I think I was just being one of these:
http://www.geographia.com/argentina/crab.jpg
Don't mind me, it comes and goes.

[Red Princess]

most entertaining read.
i think your letter is fine malarky and i hope blake decides to still be your friend.

[ambo]

Originally posted by Red Princess
most entertaining read.
i think your letter is fine malarky and i hope blake decides to still be your friend.

hey you !

[Clytie]

wow u miss aday and u miss....all the Malarkey! heya!

[zenbabe]

:D

[RuneT]

Originally posted by malarkey
yes i am going to write him a letter. is it true its not cold?

Not if you dress right and make sure you move around. In January it can be -35C but in April it can be +15C.

[malarkey]

today in malrkey news i cant stay for very long. its all gone wrong. blakes mom told my mom about me being gay and now i am in big big trouble. i got to go home now cuz im just supposed to be at the store to get my mom her smokes. i will try and come and see you all later but if i cant then i will see you all tomorrow, if my mom lets me. i hate blake.

[JesusTitties]

lol.

[Hyakujo's Fox]

it's like a Greek tragedy

without the Greeks

or the tragedy

[rmr]

Originally posted by Hyakujo's Fox
it's like a Greek tragedy

without the Greeks

or the tragedy

:D

[malarkey]

oh my god!!! its going crazy in my house!!! got to go now bye!!!

[Red Princess]

i will worry about you until you come back and tell us if everything is ok.

[Smartypants]

Originally posted by Hyakujo's Fox
it's like a Greek tragedy

without the Greeks

or the tragedy

ROFL!!

[malarkey]

Originally posted by Red Princess
i will worry about you until you come back and tell us if everything is ok.

dont worry everything is okay. i told them i was joking about being gay.

[zero]

and did they get the joke wee mcclarkie?

[lapietra]

Originally posted by malarkey
dont worry everything is okay. i told them i was joking about being gay.

Oh dear. I wish you hadn't had to lie. :(

[zenbabe]

pffffffffffft

[Frieda]

zennie's got gas

[priceyfatprude]

Originally posted by malarkey
dont worry everything is okay. i told them i was joking about being gay. I dont know if I can be your friend now.

[malarkey]

oh that's sad. today in malarkey news i am very depressed. i got scolded for telling lies. nobody thought my joke was funny. even me. i dont think i will ever be able to be GAY until i leave home because otherwise i wont have a roof over my head or any pocket money and if i dont have pocket money then i cant come here and see you guys and buy juice. my mom says that if she ever catches me telling stupid GAY jokes again then she will ground me for the rest of my life. my punishment is that i am not allowed to have arnie now. that makes me very sad because i was really looking forward to meeting him. in good malarkey news blake wants to be my friend again now that i am not GAY. thats all for now. bye xxx

[xerocs]

I am gone for a while and this is the shite that I come back to?

Here are my thoughts on the matter....

1) never thought I would say this but thank god zero is posting in this thread...

2) Is this kid retarded? starved for attention? how is it possible for an 18 year old to be so naive?

3) If he really is retarded, thank you Ze for containing him to one thread... not that there is a problem with someone being handicapped, special, or retarded, but for the fact that I think there could be some better places to get advice or life expiriences...

4) Lala, until the true intentions of this "person" have been revealed can I suggest you don't get attached?

5) PFP, how is the situation with the smoker going?

6) I am too lazy to read all of the threads I have missed but has anyone seen MoN and this macnarkey charachter in the same room? And, why hasn't MoN attacked him yet?

7) How can you know you are gay at 18?

8) Excersise is compassion, maybe you shouldn't ask your straight friend to "take pictures of you" together or otherwise... that makes my skin crawl just thinking about the creepy salad fingers voice you might use to request above said favor...

So anyway... just my thoughts... I think I might contain myself to this thread too.

[Smartypants]

shhhhh. keep really quiet. it's been really peaceful for the past day and he may be gone, but then again he may just be sleeping.


(And btw, you can tell something's different when you're five -- or younger -- but you don't really identify what the hell that is, or always admit it to yourself or others, until a few years later -- way before 18.

[Frieda]

nice move, xerocs :rolleyes:

[trisherina]

Sorry your life has gone kaflooey, malarkey. Just come to your thread anytime and there will probably be someone willing to boost your spirits. Ignore everything else. This will all work itself out eventually.

[malarkey]

okay i finally got a pic of me and one of the chineses scanned it in and put it on a disc and then he put it on the internet so you can see me.

this is me.http://photos.friendster.com/photos/63/75/11525736/5541931015762l.jpg

[trisherina]

Aw! You look so cheerful despite all the bad stuff you've had happening! Great picture.

[malarkey]

ive got big ears

[Frieda]

hey, this isn't the insecurity thread

[trisherina]

(so does my husband, I think big ears are nice and boyish)

[malarkey]

thanks

[priceyfatprude]

Originally posted by xerocs
7) How can you know you are gay at 18? Because when he goes out with girls, they end up critiquing each other's outfits.

Or brushing each others hair. :p

You can know you are gay @ 12 when your friends bring over a Playboy & you are critiquing the lighting & costume choices rather than getting watered up over seeing naked chicks.

[malarkey]

are you still gonna be my friend?

[Clytie]

awe shucks... i missed the malarkey pic!

[malarkey]

its still there, look upwards.

[priceyfatprude]

Originally posted by malarkey
are you still gonna be my friend? Yes, sweetie. You will need all the friends you can get while you're still in the closet. *smooch*

[Clytie]

yer a red X!

ive seen you before!

[priceyfatprude]

Originally posted by Clytie
yer a red X!

ive seen you before! Right click the picture.

Click on Properties.

Highlight the link with your mouse.

Copy it using CTRL + C.

Paste it into a new browser window.




This is the last time I am typing these instructions.

[Clytie]

*feels like an idiot*

er...nice pic

[lapietra]

Oh, you're so cute! (I knew you were cute. :))

Still feel like tucking you under my arm & walking around with you ;)

[Frieda]

Originally posted by lapietra
Oh, you're so cute! (I knew you were cute. :))

Still feel like tucking you under my arm & walking around with you ;)
she means she wants to skin you and use you as a handbag :p

[lapietra]

:p

[malarkey]

yay!!! now can i see a picture of you!!!

[lapietra]

I would post one, but my site is down right now.
But that's me in my avatar ;)

[malarkey]

oh thats you!!!

[lapietra]

hee hee... yes, silly :p Why would I post a pic of someone else?

[malarkey]

dunno!!! ha ha ha!!!

[Magpie]

Originally posted by xerocs
8) Excersise is(in?)compassion, maybe you shouldn't ask your straight friend to "take pictures of you" together or otherwise... that makes my skin crawl just thinking about the creepy salad fingers voice you might use to request above said favor...
wtf? :mad:

[lapietra]

That is precisely why there's an "Ignore" feature built into this board ;)

[Willow Sylph]

Originally posted by xerocs
...I think I might contain myself to this thread too. LOL!

[Willow Sylph]

8) Excersise is compassion, maybe you shouldn't ask your straight friend to "take pictures of you" together or otherwise... that makes my skin crawl just thinking about the creepy salad fingers voice you might use to request above said favor... That's mean! Xerocs, you should be whipped, and not in that sexy kind of way...

[melissa]

What is "creepy salad fingers voice"?

[Smartypants]

Originally posted by melissa
What is "creepy salad fingers voice"?

click. (http://zefrank.com/bulletin/showthread.php?s=&threadid=5506)

[melissa]

thanks smartypants. now I feel gross.

[Frieda]

don't be, xerocs crossed the line (imho and blablabla)

[Smartypants]

oh? I didn't realize at this point that there were any lines left. :rolleyes:

[Frieda]

well :rolleyes:

ok

for me there are, especially when it comes to xerocs' no 7 and 8. the rest was bad, but that really did it for me.

[xerocs]

Originally posted by priceyfatprude
Because when he goes out with girls, they end up critiquing each other's outfits.

Or brushing each others hair. :p

You can know you are gay @ 12 when your friends bring over a Playboy & you are critiquing the lighting & costume choices rather than getting watered up over seeing naked chicks.

I do that stuff too... but umm... fact is I am not gay. The point I was making is this... How is it possible to not even know what you want to be when and if you grow up but know without a doubt that you are gay... I could swallow curious, maybe... but gay? Not to mention, if you are gay be proud of it... you are 18... maybe it is time to get a job, a house, and some friends that will respect you for what you are... and if your parents can't swallow it now, give them some time.... when they see that you are serious maybe they will come around...

I wasn't trying to be mean... I am just throwing my thoughts out there. I know that you guys have been there for me through my whiney periods and doubtful periods, but the same advice was given to me, in a round-a-bout way... Stand up for yourself and the things you believe in. And don't lust over John Stamos.

[Frieda]

Originally posted by xerocs
I do that stuff too... but umm... fact is I am not gay. The point I was making is this... How is it possible to not even know what you want to be when and if you grow up but know without a doubt that you are gay... I could swallow curious, maybe... but gay?

what came first for you then? knowing that you were going to be in the army or your first crush?

[xerocs]

well first off... I am in the Air Force...


My first crush was Kelly Allen Hobbs... in sixth grade so if you were refering to homosexual tendancies you are way off the mark.... so I take care of myself... that doesn't mean I suck C***

[lapietra]

I don't know about how it is for gay men - but I started having sexual feelings for guys when I was *nine*. (I'm not kidding.)
There's no mistaking physical attraction, unless everything in your environment is set up to confuse and mislead you. I knew very clearly what my body's reaction to guys was about. Pretty sure it's not just about wanting to put on makeup and discuss hairstyles and lighting.

Deciding what you want to be when you grow up has a lot more to do with logic and planning than wanting to have intercourse with someone.

[Frieda]

Originally posted by xerocs
well first off... I am in the Air Force...


My first crush was Kelly Allen Hobbs... in sixth grade so if you were refering to homosexual tendancies you are way off the mark.... so I take care of myself... that doesn't mean I suck C***
i was not referring to homosexual tendencies. i was asking if you had your first crush before you knew that you wanted to be in the Air Force.

[xerocs]

Yes and no... I knew that I wanted to be a soldier the first time someone asked me what I wanted to be... I just didn't know what that entailed... I see where you are going with this though... point taken.

[xerocs]

OK Mark, you can be gay... but be proud and the Stamos rule still applies.

[ally]

i can't believe i just took the time to read this thread.

[Frieda]

Originally posted by ally
i can't believe i just took the time to read this thread.
isn't life wonderful sometimes? :p

[Audreyvgs]

There's a difference between what you are and what you want to do.

You might always know what you are, I always did, but I still don't know what I want to do.

[melissa]

Most of my friends are gay men who I've known since they were in their mid to late teens and most of them knew they were gay since they were just children. Nearly all of them have taken a long time to figure out what they want to do or are still in the process of it, but they've always been certain of their attraction to other men.

[Willow Sylph]

Originally posted by xerocs
...And don't lust over John Stamos. I must agree with Xerocs here 100%.

[priceyfatprude]

Originally posted by lapietra
Pretty sure it's not just about wanting to put on makeup and discuss hairstyles and lighting. I know. I was being stereotypical to prove a point.

Most of my gay friends knew from when they were quite young that something was different, but weren't sure what. In fact, one of them was an arch bushman in high school & college until one day he just stopped ****ing girls & now he & his partner live in the UP together.

[lapietra]

Originally posted by priceyfatprude
I know. I was being stereotypical to prove a point.


Oh - I knew you were ;) So was I :p

[funkytuba]

Originally posted by xerocs
I do that stuff too... but umm... [...] I could swallow

:eek:

[trisherina]

Less interesting than whether malarkey "could be" gay or not (I vote wellofcoursehecould), is the matter of how people around him are responding to the notion. Tells me a lot about both malarkey and the people without having to read a long story.

[Clytie]

http://www.barracudamagazine.com/gifs/malarkeymtns1.JPG

[RuneT]

wheres malarkey?

[zero]

Originally posted by RuneT
wheres malarkey?

ran out of juice and/or grounded?

[Clytie]

he supposedly doesnt have internet at home...and is getting online at libraries and/or internet cafes...

[Red Princess]

hi malarky, i am sorry you felt you had to lie, perhaps later you will be able to tell the truth. maybe after they all get over the initial surprise they will be ok with it. meanwhile i am glad you got your pal blake back.

[Smartypants]

My guess is whoever invented him got bored, or realized it was just too much trouble to sign on and off to perpetuate his deceit.

Let's just keep our fingers crossed that his boredom or the tedium of being a pointless irritant will relegate him to being just a low point in zefrank.com history.

:rolleyes:

[malarkey]

hi everybody, sorry i couldnt come to see you yesterday but i had to stay at home with my mom. we had my grandma over for lunch and she spat her carrots on the table. it was gross!!!

i know what you are saying about me smartypants and i dont mind if you dont like me cuz plenty of people do, even blake does now but i havent been feeling so much like seeing him. i havent felt so much like being very happy at all the last couple of days. i have to say that everything has been more or less rubbish and last night when i was in bed i was looking at the ceiling and i thought to myself. i wonder where i am going to be in two years time. i hope i am not lying here looking at the same ceiling.

i hope all of you are very well and you all had a nice weekend and everything.

see you later

love Mark xxx

[Audreyvgs]

2 years, 5 yrs, 10 yrs, 40. It goes fast. make plans.

[Clytie]

why not plan your 2 years out now...from vet visits to cooking classes to dinner with grandma to walks with blake..you can nowschedule everything! (http://www.dollar-soft.com/index.html)

[malarkey]

oh that is so cool clytie. can you help me make some plans? I want to go on a vacation to where nobody knows me and where I can sit under a big tree and sing my songs.

one day i will invent something like macdonalds or like burger king and then everyone will see that i am clever and smart and i will give some of my money to my mom and some to my dad and some to blake and some to you guys cuz you are so nice and some to my grandma and then maybe i will buy a house and i will have ten cats and ten dogs and lama and ze will be my boyfriend and everyone can come stay and we can have parties and drink wine and smoke cigerettes and sing songs all together on my guitar and maybe even go in the swimming pool cuz i think i'll have a swimming pool and even a hot tub and everything!

and then all the rest of my money will go to all the people who dont have food and all the people who are sad and then they can be happy and have food and then i am going to make a dream come trues for everyone every day.

i love my life yay!!!

[Audreyvgs]

o ferchrissakes.

[Smartypants]

For everyone? Toto too?

[zero]

Originally posted by malarkey
...I can sit under a big tree and sing my songs.

...sing songs all together on my guitar ...

mcclarkie you like music - got a favorite song or band?

[malarkey]

yes my favorite song is 'cry me a river' and my vaorite band is justin timberlake. what about you?

[malarkey]

i love you call me mclarkie!!!

[zero]

doctor jones by aqua - it's great!



chorus goes:


doctor jones, jones - (wake up now)
doctor jones, jones - (wake up now)
doctor jones, jones - (wake up now)
doctor jones, jones,
wake up now!

ah-yippie-yi-yu
ah-yippie-yi-yeah
ah-yippie-yi-yu-ah

ah-yippie-yi-yu
ah-yippie-yi-yeah
ah-yippie-yi-yu-ah

[malarkey]

yes!!! they did the barbie song too!

im a barbie girl in a barbie world

its conatgious something something ragious

[zero]

Originally posted by malarkey
its conatgious something something ragious

that's it wee mcclarkie!

[malarkey]

yay!!! lets do another song!!!

[Willow Sylph]

Originally posted by Smartypants
For everyone? Toto too? ROFL!!!

[trisherina]

malarkey, I understand that you want to be kind to Frieda (I thought your offering to stand up to your mom if she stood up to hers was very kind) and that's really great, but if you keep posting in other threads you will simply give people the necessary means to have you ejected. You have to show a little staying power with your impulses. Unless you want to be booted, in which case never mind.

[malarkey]

i think ze will see that i didnt do anything worng or say anything bad and he will see the right from the wrong. you have to be an idiot if you cant see that i was just trying to say nice things to frieda, i wasnt even talking to avalon i dont even know why she had to stick her nose in. then she asked me to pm her and i did but then she didnt even reply. and now i think she is a mean person and a idiot because she could have just let me say a nice thing but she didnt and anyway i dont care if everybody runs to ze like crying babies and tries to have me kicked out because i think ze is smart and he wont let that happen to me. he will look at all the evidence and see that i didnt do or say anything wrong and thats the truth. i have been good. i have stayed in my own list and even let people say horrible things to me in my list and i havent tried to have them booted off but maybe i will start sending ze the messages i have had from people calling me the c word and the f word and everyting but i havent because i am used to being called names. i dont think i did anything wrong.

[trisherina]

I am sorry about people writing really nasty things to you; I think that's quite shameful.

HOWEVER

The rule ze gave you was very clear and simple. Don't post in other threads til he says you can.

It doesn't matter that your intentions are honourable. If you violate the rule, you give people an excuse to say "See? He can't even follow one simple rule. Boot him!"

Don't provide the excuse. Stay in your thread. Just try.

[Smartypants]

Has anyone noticed that Malarkey and JesusTitties are never seen together in the same room?

It's sort of weird. You'll be talking to JesusTitties, and then he'll make some excuse like, "Oh my, look at the time, I have to go get the air changed in my tires and I don't want to be late," or he'll pointout the window and say, "Look! A camel with three humps!" and when you turn around he's gone, but two minutes later, Malarkey comes in doing his box-of-hammers routine. Then HE makes some excuse, and JT comes back.

Interesting...

:p

[dinzdale]

Originally posted by Smartypants
Interesting...

No. Not really.



I cant believe how anyone gets to live to be eighteen who wants to sing under a fvcking tree, talking like a baby one minute then using big words like "evidence" the next. A least be a consistent pratt. I am very tired of this shite.

Carry on.

[Smartypants]

When yer right, yer right!

"Interesting" was a poor choice of words. I apologize.

[priceyfatprude]

JT doesn't do puppets. It might be the only thing he doesn't do.

I think Malarkey should send Ze every nasty PM he's received.

This board is for everyone. Anyone who wants to can come here & post. It would behoove some of you to remember that.

[Willow Sylph]

Originally posted by dinzdale
...I cant believe how anyone gets to live to be eighteen who wants to sing under a fvcking tree, talking like a baby one minute then using big words like "evidence" the next. A least be a consistent pratt. I am very tired of this shite. Good point.

[Willow Sylph]

Originally posted by Smartypants
Has anyone noticed that Malarkey and JesusTitties are never seen together in the same room?

It's sort of weird. You'll be talking to JesusTitties, and then he'll make some excuse like, "Oh my, look at the time, I have to go get the air changed in my tires and I don't want to be late," or he'll pointout the window and say, "Look! A camel with three humps!" and when you turn around he's gone, but two minutes later, Malarkey comes in doing his box-of-hammers routine. Then HE makes some excuse, and JT comes back.

Interesting...:p I've entertained that idea myself, Smarty...

[malarkey]

its okay i dont mind if people call me baby. I speak in big words because i know them i know all about life and adult things but sometimes i come accross like i dont. i do understand everything everyone talks about apart from some things. i am not good at punctuation but i was top in my class at spelling and i have a high iq because my teacher said i was good at that. sometimes my mom says i am smarter than her because i make it easy for her to understand things sometimes. i like everyone even avalon i didnt mean to call her idiot and now i fell bad for saying it but sometimes i think people dont give other people a fair chance and so what if i still want to do things like sing under a tree? sometimes you have to just not be embarassed and rememeber that trees are there bto give you shade and let you sing under them at least thats what i think. i think you should always do what your heart says and my heart said answer to frieda even if you might get booted off, because she needs to hear some nice words and its worth it. I like you all, you are lovely people, even avalon because she just doesnt understand me like the kids in school and thats okay. zero told me some true stuff and i believe zero and i believe priceyfatprune and I believe lapiatra and trisherina and mostly all of you because you helped me with my letter to Blake and you didnt have to and you have made me feel like a nice person to talk to and i never felt that before except from my family and thank you. you are all nice. xxxxxxxxxxxxx

[malarkey]

oh i forgot to mention willow and red and the one with the little brown man they are lovely too. and everyone really

[nycwriters]

Originally posted by priceyfatprude
JT doesn't do puppets. It might be the only thing he doesn't do.
.

Actually when he first got here he was in the habit of making up a new username almost every day. This was before you landed here.

[malarkey]

oh and nyc writers she is nice too

[malarkey]

i got to go now xx

[Smartypants]

Originally posted by priceyfatprude
JT doesn't do puppets. It might be the only thing he doesn't do.

I was only joking. (OK, not my best effort.) This all seems very un-JT. It just occurred to me I hadn't seen a JT post lately. I could just as easily have said, "hey, where'd JT go?" Next time I will.

This board is for everyone. Anyone who wants to can come here & post. It would behoove some of you to remember that.

Yep, anyone can post (if they're not disruptive, I understand). And anyone can complain. But also, anyone can call anyone else on their bullshit. Peefy -- *you* don't let a lot of BS go by, so I know you'll agree.

And this guy's so full of it his eyes are brown. And there's chain-yanking evidence in nearly every post. Are all of you just having fun playing along, or do you really take him seriously? If you're playing along, all the power to you - have fun; if you're of the belief he's for real, though, it would concern me. Maybe I'm the one being dense and don't get that the support for Malarket is as phony as he is.

Tell me you're all in on it and I'll back off. Or don't tell me, and I'll be the gullible one who fell for the deception, not by Malarkey but by those who are feigning sincerity for him.

But if he starts seeping back into the general message board, I think that qualifies as nuisance, not free expression, and there are signs already that the malarkey is spreading again.

:rolleyes:

[priceyfatprude]

The fact that you guys are spending so much time thinking about him makes Malarkey's weenie hard.

[amanda]

aww. what a thoughtful gift.

you guys really know how to band together and make someone's day a whole lot brighter.

[priceyfatprude]

Originally posted by nycwriters
Actually when he first got here he was in the habit of making up a new username almost every day. This was before you landed here. The only other one I've seen is UrbanSquid.

[priceyfatprude]

Originally posted by priceyfatprude
The fact that you guys are spending so much time thinking about him makes Malarkey's weenie hard. I'm just saying, we should treat him as a person.

[Red Princess]

i don't know if malarky is "real" or not, nor do i know if anyone else is "real' or not (with the exception of the ones i have met in person). i will continue to assume that he is real enough.

so, malarky, do you write songs?

[trisherina]

"Never attribute to malice what can be adequately explained by stupidity." -- Nick Diamos

And I don't just mean malarkey. If I don't follow this rule of thumb I find it impossible to communicate clearly (and by communicate I mean "exchange ideas") on message boards or otherwise.

[Red Princess]

LOL
hey who you calling stupid?

[trisherina]

You know I'm far too passive-aggressive to say. :p

[Red Princess]

*waiting impatiently for today's malarky update*

[masterofNone]

i think it's agent.

[Deviate]

i've thought the same thing since the get-go.

[malarkey]

Hello everybody,

sorry to keep you waiting i have been very busy already today! I had to take my neighbours dog for a walk, its a pretty stupid dog and it bites everybody and even itself sometimes. it likes to bite its leash and drag you along and then it doesnt even do one poop it does three! but my mom said i had to because our neighbour is sick and she cant walk the dog herself. the dog is called angel by the way, how stupid is that name, very stupid i say. anyway i decided to call her seymore the whole time we were on the walk because that is what zes dog is called and i like the names he has for his animals better than angel. and by the end of the walk she was coming to the name seymore!!! how cool is that!!! and on the walk we played ball and we played rolling in the grass and all kinds of things except i didnt play too close because otherwise she would have bit me. so thats it so far and i will let you know when something else exciting happens.

ze i like your new blog its so cool!!! and you are so hot!!! what is lelping though?

yay!!! i am very happy to be here to see you all today!!! how are you all what you been doing?

love mark xxx

[malarkey]

Originally posted by Red Princess
i don't know if malarky is "real" or not, nor do i know if anyone else is "real' or not (with the exception of the ones i have met in person). i will continue to assume that he is real enough.

so, malarky, do you write songs?

yes i do write songs that are sort of like rock songs shall i tell you one?

[malarkey]

this is my thingy for the seymore thingy for the front site.

oh dear i used to like
to lick my balls but now i
cant lick my balls anymore because they are gone


can you put it up please ze?

[zefrank]

hey b-friend.

your "haiku" is live

[malarkey]

yay!!! thank you boyfriend!!! what does live mean?

[red]

not dead

[nycwriters]

Originally posted by masterofNone
i think it's agent.

Naw. I think I've finally got it figured out. It's not agent.

And again, I say, I don't get why this particular puppet got all the negative and extreme attention he/she did, when others who have posted far more malicious crap have barely been acknowledged.

[Blue]

this is the funniest thing I have EVER read. Hilarious.

[masterofNone]

Originally posted by nycwriters
And again, I say, I don't get why this particular puppet got all the negative and extreme attention he/she did, when others who have posted far more malicious crap have barely been acknowledged.
one word. volume.

[Coffee]

I think your right Mon.

That and the sense that it is just on the edge of innane, so if it is a puppet it would be really annoying, and if it is real it would be really sad, but not evil or bad, there is no crime in not being a rocket scientist.

I frankly find the Mr. Huffer creature far more offensive than Malarky.
Here is why:
There is an actual Mr Huffer. The monkey that posted and is "posing" as Mr. Huffer used a photo of the real Mr. Huffer that had a url link to the school where the real Mr. Huffer works...thus there is concievably a chance that the real Mr. Huffer might find out that his name, image and psychotic references to his mother and "phycho" the movie are being made light of in a public place. I would be PISSED if I was the real Mr. Huffer...a teacher, someone that works with kids etc. What if he read that and found a whole bizarre discussion about his mom, who could be dead, ill, a saint in his memory, whatever...man that would suck.

At least Malarkey is not being anything other than the annonymous Malarkey.

end 2 cents.

and, no, I don't want to be your boy friend Malarkey.

[masterofNone]

i think mr. huffer is hysterical.

[nycwriters]

Originally posted by masterofNone
one word. volume.

Oh, like there haven't been a bazillion image threads ... :rolleyes: -- not all of those images have been "just" images.

And for the record, I enjoy Mr. Huffer too.

[masterofNone]

yeah, but they grew up over time. and they stick to their own threads pretty much. this character was posting 70 times a day in all the threads. it was too much noise.

[nycwriters]

Originally posted by masterofNone
yeah, but they grew up over time. .

that's debatable.

you have a PM.

[malarkey]

hello!!!! its me!! well nothing much happened today in malarkey news apart from the doogie thats what i call dogs doogies. how is everyone doing? i hope that you all had a sunny day because i did. i am very pleased that the gorgeous sean connery mon has dropped by to say hi because he is gorgeous and i dont even mind the rude words he sent to my private message place. everyone is welcome.

[malarkey]

today i was thinking about names i hate like i hate rick. it sounds like a losers name. i like ze that is cool. i hate my name mark. my favorite name is jack cuz its normal.

[nycwriters]

yeah I just finished saying you weren't malicious. way to go.

[malarkey]

what have i done now?

[bealeblues]

malarkey hates the name rick. right on cue.

[xerocs]

Originally posted by malarkey
my private message place. everyone is welcome.

??????

I wish I was gay so that I could lead you on and then rain on your parade...

[Mocha]

Originally posted by xerocs
??????

I wish I was gay so that I could lead you on and then rain on your parade... I've always thought you were queer, if that helps any.

[Red Princess]

Originally posted by malarkey
yes i do write songs that are sort of like rock songs shall i tell you one?

oh yes, please do

[Willow Sylph]

Originally posted by bealeblues
malarkey hates the name rick. right on cue. Isn't it though?

[red]

:rolleyes:

[masterofNone]

so... how many folks know my name?

[malarkey]

Okay here is my song for you. I wrote it when I was 16 and it was because i heard my dad telling my mom that he read it in the newspaper that in austrailia or somewhere like that some of the farmers were falling in love with the babies of the cows, these are called calfs and there were these special calfs called bobby calfs and i decided to write a song about it. its a duet and i think it would be good sung by Britney Spears and Tom Jones.



Gold Bobby High
By Mark Grey 2002


Listen to me y’all

You gotta go out there and get yourself some Bobby Lurrrve

Pick yerself up some Bobby Gloves

Get yerself in your Bobby truck

And bob on down to the Bobby love farm


Girlfren’ girlfren’ here me now

If he’s fallen for a Bobby you can kiss him goodbye

Cos’ you know he’ll be going for the gold Bobby high.

Follow me Follow me

Follow me Follow me

To the Bobby lurrrrve tree To the Bobby lurrrve tree

Where you can learn your Bobby job

Sitting on my knee


Chorus.

Bobby lurrrve I don’t
Bobby lurrrve I don’t
Bobby lurrrve I don’t
Bobby
jobs I don’t do Bobby lurrrve


Blues and Charlie

Wiz and whack

I woke up and the ocean was my back

You were the sea

I was the Bee

We buzzed together and made a tree

The Bobby lurrrve tree.




You were honey you were honey to me

When you fell on my face from the Bobby lurrrrve tree

I knew there and then there was danger ahead

But all I could think of was you in my bed


Girlfren girlfren listen to me

I never went near that Bobby lurrrve tree

You might think I’m mad

You might think I’m sad

But I’m just a victim of the Bobby lurrvve fad


Chorus

Bobby lurrrve I don’t
Bobby lurrrve I don’t
Bobby lurrrve I don’t
Bobby
jobs I don’t do Bobby lurrrve

[malarkey]

Originally posted by masterofNone
so... how many folks know my name?

i dont but i bet i can guess!!!

[Audreyvgs]

Originally posted by malarkey


You gotta go out there and get yourself some Bobby Lurrrve




To the Bobby lurrrrve tree To the Bobby lurrrve tree



Bobby lurrrve I don’t
Bobby lurrrve I don’t
Bobby lurrrve I don’t I don’t do Bobby lurrrve



Y

When you fell on my face from the Bobby lurrrrve tree


I never went near that Bobby lurrrve tree


But I’m just a victim of the Bobby lurrvve fad


Chorus

Bobby lurrrve I don’t
Bobby lurrrve I don’t
Bobby lurrrve I don’t
Bobby
jobs I don’t do Bobby lurrrve

[Willow Sylph]

Originally posted by masterofNone
so... how many folks know my name? Don't know how many, but it's obvious Malarkey knows it. What a surprise...

[Red Princess]

hi malarky, why don't you share with us a song you have written yourself?

[malarkey]

I did write that song myself!

[malarkey]

Originally posted by Willow Sylph
Don't know how many, but it's obvious Malarkey knows it. What a surprise...

i dont know it! what is it?

[Magpie]

Originally posted by malarkey
i dont know it! what is it?
:rolleyes:
"Jethro"

[malarkey]

oh thats a fun name!!!

[rmr]

why don't you sing us another song -- that one was great!!!

or better yet why don't you tell us all about bobby

[malarkey]

Originally posted by rmr
why don't you sing us another song -- that one was great!!!

or better yet why don't you tell us all about bobby

i told you about the bobby calfs already but here is another song. this one is more recent.

PRINCESS PICASSO

by Mark Grey 2004

She was kissing him
So don’t get mad
She looked at him
I know its bad
But whatever you say
She let him
Twenty four seven
She let him
It’s the ABC – C for
Kissing him, kissing him
I’ve always said, she was kissing him

(chorus)
So you spent too long
Analysing the situation (the situation)
Must be why you say
I was depressed
But you’re crazy to forget
I’m the Princess
Picasso, PPPPPPPrincess Picasso
Fantasy you think
You’ve got to really stink
It’s my fantasy ‘cause
I’m the Princess
Picasso, PPPPPPPrincess Picasso
(spoken slowly during the above –
Go on and give it a go-go, go on and sue me then. I said give it a go-go, go on and sue me then)
And as I said, she was kissing him

So you’re suing now
Like you sued me then
You say I’m just
A vegetarian
But I’m alive and
You are dead
Twenty four seven
You are dead
It’s the ABC – C for
Vegetarianism, vegetarianism
I’m so not a vegetarian

(chorus)
So you spent too long
Analysing the situation, the situation
Must be why you say
I was depressed
But you’re crazy to forget
I’m the Princess
Picasso, PPPPPPPrincess Picasso
Fantasy you think
You’ve got to really stink
It’s my fantasy ‘cause
I’m the Princess
Picasso, PPPPPPPrincess Picasso
(spoken slowly during the above –
Go on and give it a go-go, go on and sue me then. I said give it a go-go, go on and sue me then)
And I’m so not into vegetarianism


So my mother’s boy
Was my brother’s son
And my sister’s bro’
Said he’s got a gun
But it’s my baby so
Shoot at me
Twenty four seven
(You’ve gotta) Shoot at me
It’s the ABC – C for
So very crazily, so very crazily
So you better come shoot at me

So you spent too long
Analysing the situation, the situation
Must be why you say
I was depressed
But you’re crazy to forget
I’m the Princess
Picasso, PPPPPPPrincess Picasso
Fantasy you think
You’ve got to really stink
It’s my fantasy ‘cause
I’m the Princess
Picasso, PPPPPPPrincess Picasso
(spoken slowly during the above –
Go on and give it a go-go, go on and sue me then. I said give it a go-go, go on and sue me then)
It’s my baby, you better come shoot at me

[zero]

those are poptastic lyrics wee mcclarkie and there's no denying it!

what's the tune go like?

[malarkey]

if you tell me your phone number i can sing it to you!!!

[rmr]

i have a feeling i know who you are and if i'm right you're going to get a good swift smack in the head

http://whaven.czmb.net/data/media/18/Ali-G.jpg

[Red Princess]

i dunno pal, sounds like you are singing with someone else's voice. try again

[malarkey]

but you cant hear my voice?!!

did you like my songs?

[Red Princess]

i meant that those songs do not sound like you.
i want to say i like them but i do not understand them

[funkytuba]

hey malarkey:

do you have a ponytail?


:D

[Red Princess]

Originally posted by funkytuba
hey malarkey:

do you have a ponytail?


:D

don't make me come over there. 2 is plenty

[moel]

remember when red princess finally admitted to being malarkey

[Red Princess]

hahahaha, it aint me pal, i have never been anyone but me

[rmr]

Originally posted by moel
remember when red princess finally admitted to being malarkey

i remember

i do

i remember

[nycwriters]

remember when malarkey used to mean:

ma·lar·key also ma·lar·ky ( P ) Pronunciation Key (m-lärk)
n. Slang

Exaggerated or foolish talk, usually intended to deceive: “snookered by a lot of malarkey” (New Republic).

[melissa]

Aw, the good ol' days...

[moel]

hey remember when we deleted all those posts

what a weekend

[nycwriters]

Originally posted by moel
hey remember when we deleted all those posts

what a weekend

Weekend?!

Dude, that took me months.

[moel]

oh

i did 4000 in three days but i started to go crazy

[nycwriters]

I have no clue how you did that ... that must have been three days straight, zero sleep!

*cough*

[moel]

it was straight and sometimes i dont sleep and it was kinda neat seeing all those old posts

[rmr]

ok - so i used a friend of mine's computer while i was in chicago to read this board -- this person shares the same sense of humor as me (meaning really imature childish and shite) anyway i've told this person about the board but i've never shared the url (i've always felt this was my place and didn't want to share it with all my "outside" friends)....like i said i used this friends computer without thinking that they could track me back here......well malarkey started posting right around the same time i got back. the writing and the story line made me think of this friend so i asked him/her and they got pissed and told me i was paranoid and that i should get a life.........but after i said that the posts have slowed down. so all i'm trying to say is that if my friend is not doing this then you'll never see this message (and i'm wrong sorry) but if you are i think you're a real arsehole and i'm really pissed because i was trying to give the benefit of the doubt.

btw this person does freelance work and has no "real" schedule........so am i an arsehole for asking?

[rmr]

sorry meant to add this ......if i brought this on and it's all.....how shall i call it....MALARKEY........then i apologize to everyone here cause that's some dumb ass shite RESPECT

[Red Princess]

see? i told you it aint me

[rmr]

Originally posted by Red Princess
see? i told you it aint me


dude i'm not ruling you out.........i'm just letting eveyone else in on my hunch...........but i have a couple of hunches

[Audreyvgs]

oh, rimmy. :(

[melissa]

Just keep us posted, darlin'.

[trisherina]

Originally posted by rmr
the writing and the story line made me think of this friend so i asked him/her and they got pissed and told me i was paranoid and that i should get a life.........but after i said that the posts have slowed down. so all i'm trying to say is that if my friend is not doing this then you'll never see this message (and i'm wrong sorry) but if you are i think you're a real arsehole and i'm really pissed because i was trying to give the benefit of the doubt.

btw this person does freelance work and has no "real" schedule........so am i an arsehole for asking?

Malarkey has a story line?

[melissa]

:eek:

[malarkey]

right this is making me really fed up. I am me, Mark Grey. I dont even live in chicago.

I wrote those songs by myself. I am not red, ze, rmr, rmr's friend, blue, agent or anyone else i keep being accused of being.

but you know what? this place is bad anyhow. first you be horrible, then you be nice and ask me to write you what i did and tell you songs and now you be horrible again and its very confusing and i dont understand you all at all. so i dont care if none of you write in my list ever again becausae it only makes me sad when i read it anyway. and i have been trying really hard to do good punctuation because i thought that would make you understand me better but i probably just wasted my time. over and out.

[malarkey]

and also you can see from my picture that i clearly do not have a ponytail so why ask such a stupid question? over and out.

[red]

Originally posted by malarkey
I am not red, ze, rmr, rmr's friend, blue, agent or anyone else i keep being accused of being.


hahahhahahaha!
Have I been accused of being malarkey, really?

[malarkey]

Originally posted by Red Princess
they asked about the pony tail because i have a weakness for guys with long hair. i know you are not me, so let's be pals. the rest of them can go piss up a rope. tell me what kind of day you are having. i am enjoying my new kitten very much. would you be offended if i named her after you?

really!!!? yay!!! oh that would be so cool. Malarkey though, not Mark? I don't like the name Mark, my favorite name is Jack. I wont say what other names I don't like because people in here get all pissed at me.

i really like guys with long hair too, like when brad pitt had long hair in that film i cant remember the name of it. it had brad pitt in it and he was very good at ri]ding horses and it had hannibal lecter in it except he was much older. damn why cant i remember what its called?

piss up a rope! ha ha ha!!! my mom says they can eat shit and die but i like piss up a rope better.

[malarkey]

i like justin timberlake.

[priceyfatprude]

A River Runs Through It?

Interview With A Vampire?

[priceyfatprude]

Originally posted by malarkey
i really like guys with long hair too, like when brad pitt had long hair in that film i cant remember the name of it. it had brad pitt in it and he was very good at ri]ding horses and it had hannibal lecter in it except he was much older. damn why cant i remember what its called? LEGENDS OF THE FALL!!!!!

[malarkey]

yay!!!! that's the one. Oh my god he was sexy in that
one.

[malarkey]

see if you can understand this one. i think it is a bit more simple.

WHEN

By Mark Grey 2004


When my hand skims across your arm
It sets off tingles and alarm
Ringing my bell
Keeping me awake
I see your face and the smile it makes
I’ve just so in lo-a-a-ve
With you

You are sharp
You are cool
You’re clever
You’re so beautiful
I’ve just always been so in lo-a-a-ve
With you.

When I smell that boyish smell
It makes me smile and say, oh well
You’re in my brain
I can’t deny it
My desire for you is insane
I’m just so in lo-a-a-ve
With you

You are sharp
You are cool
You are clever
You’re so beautiful
I’ve just always been so in lo-a-a-ve
With you.

But when I see you lust after her
I know that I’m no comforter
You want a girl
Like every other guy
I want a guy and
I just don’t know why
I’M GAY! I’M GAY!!!!!!

[priceyfatprude]

Originally posted by malarkey
yay!!!! that's the one. Oh my god he was sexy in that
one. I must concur. If you don't find him sexy in that movie, then there is something wrong w/you. And I don't even like Brad Pitt.

I like your songs. :)

[Coffee]

You write songs nearly as well as our dear friend Rapscalious Rob...but not quite as good. But keep up the fine work.

[malarkey]

thank you!!!

[malarkey]

yeah I would love it and be really truly and honestly honoured.!!!

[priceyfatprude]

And how have you been, darling?

[malarkey]

I have been very well thank you. how have you been?

I cant believe a whole kitten has been named after me!!!

today nothing much. i'll probably just try to do some drawing or maybe write another song or something. Gotta take that dog out for a walk again later, it stinks.

[priceyfatprude]

I am doing well, getting ready for a rummage sale! If only I could tear myself away from this board & from Queer as Folk on the DVD. Did you know there is a guy named Blake on there? He is a crystal meth addict & everytime they say the name Blake I think of you a lil bit.

I would suggest washing the dog, but don't do that. He will only go outside immediately after his bath & roll around in gross stuff in the backyard.

I hope you have a fabulous weekend, darling.

[malarkey]

I love rummage sales!!! you can find so many treasures in them. I wish i could watch queer as folk but my mom said i couldn't and i said well i am 18 and i am an adult so i'll do what i want. and she said not under my roof you wont and i said fine i will watch it at blakes house and she said i brought you into this world and i can take you out of it and that was the end of that.

[rapscalious rob]

thrift stores are muy cool. especially in college towns.

the rummage sale just made me think of that.

[amanda]

Originally posted by malarkey
I cant believe a whole kitten has been named after me!!!


this is a GREAT line.

[priceyfatprude]

Originally posted by malarkey
I love rummage sales!!! you can find so many treasures in them. I wish i could watch queer as folk but my mom said i couldn't and i said well i am 18 and i am an adult so i'll do what i want. and she said not under my roof you wont and i said fine i will watch it at blakes house and she said i brought you into this world and i can take you out of it and that was the end of that. :(

I wish you could come over & watch it. We could make popcorn & cuddle on the couch. Then I could take you out & show you off down in Gaytown.

Does she let you watch Joan Crawford or Judy Garland movies?

[malarkey]

I bet they aren't safe!! Kittens can be very scratchy.

I am sorry that i didnt come to see you for a couple of days but i got a bit sad and i dont know why. sometimes that happens, i just feel all down for no reason and because there is no reason i cant cheer myself up cos i dont know what i am cheering myself up about. does that make sense? so, i am afraid there isnt much to say in malarkey news, just that i spent most of the past two days with my head under the covers.

pfp, that would be excellent to come over. when can i come? where is gaytown? I love judy garland but i like justin timberlake better.

[Clytie]

Originally posted by rapscalious rob
thrift stores are muy cool. especially in college towns.

the rummage sale just made me think of that.

*nods* i heart living in a college town!

[priceyfatprude]

Originally posted by malarkey
pfp, that would be excellent to come over. when can i come? where is gaytown? I love judy garland but i like justin timberlake better. You can come whenever you like honey. In Milwaukee, Gaytown is also called the Third Ward and also Walker's Point. 2nd Street south of the freeway & just past the river. Tonight is underage night @ Cage, my favorite bar down there. You should come with us.

[Blue]

malarkey you are also welcome to come and visit me if you like. However, I live quite far away so you might have to get that job you have been banging on about to be able to do it. You are a sweetheart xxx

[malarkey]

thank you blue and Pfp. my mom says i am not allowed in here anymore until i get a job. but she says that if i get one i might be able to even have my own computer with internet and everything so i am gonna try real hard to get a job.

[priceyfatprude]

You should try the coffee or sandwich shops in the area of your town where the college kids hang. It will be good for you to meet lots of new people your own age. And everyone knows how to make a sandwich. :)

Good luck!!!!

http://www.plantshed.com/Merchant2/graphics/00000001/good%20luck%20balloon%20bokay.gif

[malarkey]

Guess what!? I got a job so now I am allowed to come back here and see you guys. I am working in a restaurant. A really good one too. I wash the dishes. But I am not allowed to come out into the bit where the customers are, only wash the dishes in the kitchen. yep, its cool.

well thats all for malarkey news

[xerocs]

retard.

[malarkey]

no I am not. I am special. that's what my mom says and you can just ask her if you dont believe me because she knows and i am not a retard because they lick windows and i dont.

[Hermione]

where oh where did malarkey go?

[Magpie]

And what, pray tell is wrong with licking windows? :rolleyes:

[malarkey]

Hello!!! Welcome back to malarkey news!!!

I have been working in the restaurant very hard and so far i have saved up $300!!! i am going to save up enough so that i can get my own computer and come in here all the time!!! and be off probabtion because i have been good and stayed in my own thread for ages now.

blake and me are back to being friends we walk the stinky dog together and everything. as a matter of fact i washed the stinky dog with blake in the bath and the dog didnt like it but the dog smellt way better and in actual fact i quite like the dog now.

blake says that he doesn't mind that i am GAY but he wont let me hold his hand anymore and thats a shame because i am not very good at crossing the street.

my mom still thinks i was joking about the being GAY thing and i think that i am going to keep it that way until i move out of home because i dont want another smack round the head.

the even BIGGER NEWS is that my dad left home. he said it's all too stressful and he likes it better at aunty lisas house. aunty lisa is my moms babyiest half sister but i dont think she is a baby because she is a bit older than me. i dont know if dad is coming back but i like aunty lisa better than mom too so you cant really blame him. mom is sad though and yesterday she drank a very big bottle of vodka and then cried and then puked. it was gross!!!

also i noticed when i came in that on the top of the message list in the front it says that the newest member in here is malarky (wrong spelling!!!) that is so cool!!! someone has named themselves after me!!! now i have a whole cat and a new message list person. but they cant have their own list like me though can they? and people wont get confused between us cuz i dont want people to think that that malarky is this malarkey. the way you can tell if its me is cuz of the spelling.

that's all for malarkey news!!! see you all later.

Love

Mark xxxx

[malarkey]

ps. I just sent a message to the new malarky to tell him that he is my biggest fan!!! yay!!!

[zero]

wee mcclarkie if you'd like a lovely new hairdo just pop in - since it's you, no appointment is needed

[malarkey]

how do i get one? where do i go?

[zero]

just pop in here (http://www.zefrank.com/bulletin/showthread.php?s=&threadid=6211) here and say zero sent you and that you'd like a lovely new hairdo

[malarkey]

i went in and i asked for one now what happens?

[JesusTitties]

hello

[malarkey]

hello

[RuneT]

hello?

[malarkey]

hi!!! Im here

[RuneT]

I'm sorry about your dad, man.

[malarkey]

me too

[RuneT]

will you live your own life in your own place soon?

[malarkey]

probably not for a while because i have only saved 300 so far.

[RuneT]

Maybe you could talk to someone who can help you. Like the council or the school? If that is what you want. Maybe you have to look after you mum for a while? I would think she needs you right now.

[malarkey]

she says all men are bastards so i am staying out of her way.

[Clytie]

Originally posted by priceyfatprude
I must concur. If you don't find him sexy in that movie, then there is something wrong w/you. And I don't even like Brad Pitt.


HEY! there is nothing wrong with me...i HATE Brad Pitt in everything!

[malarkey]

i like justin timberlake

[rmr]

i like him too

and i'm glad he dumped that dirty girl britney

[malarkey]

me too. is it true that he has split up with cameron diaz?

[rmr]

i'm not sure

i heard that they did but i haven't got my US weekly yet so i can neither confirm nor deny

[Clytie]

i think Ryan Phillipe is waay cuter!

[malarkey]

i think he split up with his wife

[rmr]

nope they're still together. just read about in last week's us weekly

[Clytie]

rmr your soo on top of things!

[rmr]

thank you

celebrity gossip is important to me

[priceyfatprude]

Welcome back, Malarkey!!! Congrats on the job & the $300 saved up. You're on your way.

Prolly best to not be out at home right now. A gay son + your dad running off with her sister = sad Malarkey Momma. *hugs* Normally I'd say be out & proud, but your mom needs you to be the same as always. When you move out you can be who you want. :)

Good to see you. Can you come to my house & do some dishes? :p

[malarkey]

Yo dudes!!! Malarkey here!!! I got some new friends at the restaurant where I work and I have tried wine and beer and car bombs and all kinds of stuff.

My dad is still with aunty lisa but shes says I have to call her mom so it is a bit confusing. sorry i haven't been here for so long but i went to see shark tale and there were loads of fish and all kinds of great funny bits in it but it wasnt as good as toy story or as good as shrek and they said stupid things and no one can beat up a shark cuz sharks are too big and clever and snarly.

everyone at my restaraunt is fun and nice they are called Leo, Miguel, Hose, Jimmy, Lula, margerita, tommy, eddie, simon, fernando, felipe, gianni, acho, paco, tony, cookie (he's my favorite name but its actually spelt cuchi), micky, gina, petra and me...mark. but they say marko. and fernando is the dad.

yes it is good to be a working man. I spent a bit of the money I have saved but I still have $300 because i put some more money back in. It will be my birthday on christmas and i have asked for a computer because i really want one and also a dog or cat or fish.

and guess what?!!! Blake works at my restaurant too and but he gets to be a waiter and I only still get to wash the dishes but I dont mind and also everyone there knows i am GAY and they dont mind too much. well they say it is a sin against god but they say i will be forgiven even if i like boys and blake says its okay as long as i dont ever touch him again. so everything is A okay!!!

How are you? what has been happening in your lives and is everybody happy, even the bee lady and even audreyvegas and even everybody!!!

oh its so nice to see you all again.

Goodbye.

Love Mark xxxxxxxxxxxx