we make things up about each other

[red]

Rune keeps this picture of himself in his attic:

http://cn.cl2000.com/art100/artworks/6l.jpg

hahahahahahahaaaa

[daverbee]

Marcus Bales needs to stock up on antiseptic spray if he's gonna steal my Urban Flea Orchid. The smell is so noxious I may pay him an additional $1,000,000 to take it away. The City of Jacksonville has promised to match any money I pay him dollar for dollar to get rid of the thing.
The Urban Flea Orchid has often been compared to a festering corpse floating in a cesspool. God knows why Trisherina wants one...

[Marcus Bales]

Now that Trish has been made a sort of demi-god on the Zefrank board she informs me that she no longer has any need for the Urban Flea Orchid that she was going to have delivered to Ze's apartment if he didn't properly acknowledge her 10,000 post achievement. Ze has kindly agreed to compensate me for my expenses so far in tracking the elusive Mr Daverbee through the urban jungle, lest I find Daverbee and deliver the UFO to Ze anyway, so everything has worked out for the best, and Daverbee, together with his Segway-propelled custom greenhouse, are, for the moment, safe again.

[daverbee]

I sold the Segway and used the money to stock up on discount internet Viagra.
(Oh, wait, we're supposed to make up stuff about each other...Sorry!)
I sold the Segway and Marcus Bales used the money to stock up on discount internet Viagra.
The portable greenhouse was part of the sale and Gainesville, Florida (Home of the purchaser, rumored to be funkytuba living now on the East Coast) has been evacuated due to the continued odiferous presence of the Urban Flea Orchid.

[craig johnston]

meanwhile, the out of control spambot rzoe hove into view and
with his foul breath destroyed every last specimen of the orchid
rendering it UTTERLY EXTINCT and thus not able to be mentioned
ever again (ever).

trish has joined the circus, db has been arrested for overt jollity,
and marcus bales has donated his infinitely dense pinhead to science.

[Marcus Bales]

Craig Johnston didn't fill out the paperwork properly and science rejected my pinhead, which meant that Trish had to run away from the circus, even though she'd fallen in love with the strong man, who turned out to be Topcat in disguise, and who followed her back to the Zeboard. Daverbee, of course, is following Frieda around and Runet is getting angry since he thinks of Frieda as his own personal property which makes Clytie sad because she's yearned for Runet since first she saw his shapely naked ass against the snow. Orchid? What orchid?

[craig johnston]

huh?
:confused:

[priceyfatprude]

Craig Johnston is a former Solid Gold Dancer. He can still lift the ladies high above his head if need be.

Daverbee hates animals.

Zero adores penguins.

You can find Jesus Titties at the church on Sunday, passing out communion wafers & giggling to himself about what he imagines them to be made out of.

[craig johnston]

that's true. i lift the ladies high.
:)

[Marcus Bales]

Madasacutsnake is really Janis Ian. Taking a break from fame, she posts anonymously on this board, and on NewPoetry as Bob Grumman.

[Coffee]

Zenbabe put a contract out on Frieda in a desperate power grab.
Frieda, however, got wind of it and mentioned it to a friend of a friend of a friend of David Hasselhoff, who plans to pay a visit to Zenbabe's on his next visit to SD and gain access to ZB's home using his celebrity status and the "board prestige" a visit from the Hoff might lend ZB, and steal her wigs. Zenbabe will be distraught at the loss of her cherished wigs and will be unable to concentrate on her moderating duties...effectively robbing ZB of her power much like shearing Samson's locks rendered him helpless and weak. But Frieda doesn't know that the Hoff is not completely on her side, and the price Frieda will have to pay will cost her too much, forcing her to work extra shifts, effectively shutting down her ability to moderate.

But what ZB and Frieda don't know, is that Lala is actually the mastermind of this twisted scheme. She has been sublty manipulating ZB and Freeds via PM's and IM's "drunk dials" planting seeds of distrust and competition designed to cause the two hapless ladies to destroy each other leaving Lala as undisputed tyrant of the board. Lala is the one that tipped off Frieda about ZB's contract. And Lala's own contacts with the Hoff arranged for the Hoff to act as double agent screwing both Zen and Frieda...but not literally...sorry Frieda and Zen...it was a figure of speach.

BUT...unbeknownst even to Lala...is that Rap Rob is the actual plot master who started the whole plan by arranging for a spam bot invasion that caused Ze to delegate his previous "TOTAL" power to the 3 most "trusted" ladies on the board by making them moderators to combat the Spam problem Rob caused on the board...Rob's influence on Lala will actually make him the new power behind the power on this board. Rapscalious Rob intends to oust Ze Frank himself in his final and ultimate scheme to achieve complete power.

[lapietra]

:eek:

i've been found out!

[rapscalious rob]

Zenbabe put a contract out on Frieda in a desperate power grab.
Frieda, however, got wind of it and mentioned it to a friend of a friend of a friend of David Hasselhoff, who plans to pay a visit to Zenbabe's on his next visit to SD and gain access to ZB's home using his celebrity status and the "board prestige" a visit from the Hoff might lend ZB, and steal her wigs. Zenbabe will be distraught at the loss of her cherished wigs and will be unable to concentrate on her moderating duties...effectively robbing ZB of her power much like shearing Samson's locks rendered him helpless and weak. But Frieda doesn't know that the Hoff is not completely on her side, and the price Frieda will have to pay will cost her too much, forcing her to work extra shifts, effectively shutting down her ability to moderate.

But what ZB and Frieda don't know, is that Lala is actually the mastermind of this twisted scheme. She has been sublty manipulating ZB and Freeds via PM's and IM's "drunk dials" planting seeds of distrust and competition designed to cause the two hapless ladies to destroy each other leaving Lala as undisputed tyrant of the board. Lala is the one that tipped off Frieda about ZB's contract. And Lala's own contacts with the Hoff arranged for the Hoff to act as double agent screwing both Zen and Frieda...but not literally...sorry Frieda and Zen...it was a figure of speach.

BUT...unbeknownst even to Lala...is that Rap Rob is the actual plot master who started the whole plan by arranging for a spam bot invasion that caused Ze to delegate his previous "TOTAL" power to the 3 most "trusted" ladies on the board by making them moderators to combat the Spam problem Rob caused on the board...Rob's influence on Lala will actually make him the new power behind the power on this board. Rapscalious Rob intends to oust Ze Frank himself in his final and ultimate scheme to achieve complete power.

Or could this all be a ruse to distract zemonkeys from Coffee's burgeoning command of the board? B-)

[JesusTitties]

jesustitties was largemarge all along

[Marcus Bales]

Zenbabe put a contract out on Frieda in a desperate power grab. Frieda, however, got wind of it ... But what ZB and Frieda don't know, is that Lala is actually the mastermind ... BUT... Rap Rob is the actual plot master who started the whole plan by arranging for a spam bot invasion ... to oust Ze Frank himself in his final and ultimate scheme to achieve complete power. Or could this all be a ruse to distract zemonkeys from Coffee's burgeoning command of the board?

That's not a burgeoning command -- he's just glad to see you.

But the real story is the Craig Johnston story. Overlooked by what seem to be the principal players because he's only four-nine in his Dr Scholl's with lifts, Craig has an advantage of working his evil on the board ahead of time since it's already tomorrow in Australia. He knows what everyone is going to do before they do it, and by the time they do it has already made sure it rebounds to his advantage. Soon he will ++++++++++++++connection terminated+++++++++++++++++

[12"razormix]

That's not a burgeoning command -- he's just glad to see you.

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! ..........

[daverbee]

Coffee is Stephen King.
Marcus Bales is Dave Barry.
Craig Johnston is Elton John. A butch Elton John, to be sure, but Elton John nonetheless.
lala is actually Anais Nin brought back from the dead by Rap Rob who is actually Raymond Chandler brought back from the dead by priceyfatprude who is actually Garrison Keillor.
I'm Dan Rather.

[RuneT]

Zero is a secret Taliban mole planning to blow up the Internet. That's why he doesn't give me his yahoo handle.

[Coffee]

-- he's just glad to see you.


Hey...^^^that is true...this is suppossed to be made up things. (It is great to see the Robster [*sucks up to the new boss*] )

[craig johnston]

Craig Johnston is Elton John. A butch Elton John, to be sure, but Elton John nonetheless.


eeeeeeeeuuuuuuugh! i wanna puke!
:eek:

[dinzdale]

If the tiara fits....

[daverbee]

eeeeeeeeuuuuuuugh! i wanna puke!
:eek:
^^^
See? A fey Elton John would have never dreamed of stating out loud that he wanted to puke! You're definitely his butch clone...

[lapietra]

Coffee is Stephen King.
Marcus Bales is Dave Barry.
Craig Johnston is Elton John. A butch Elton John, to be sure, but Elton John nonetheless.
lala is actually Anais Nin brought back from the dead by Rap Rob who is actually Raymond Chandler brought back from the dead by priceyfatprude who is actually Garrison Keillor.
I'm Dan Rather.

OW OW OW OW OW!!!

I hate it when I laugh so hard I get a headache. :p

[xfox]

k. I;m listening to Elton JOHN right now.. Em an Alice and I are having a spendid time. How wonderful life is when you're in the world!

[funkytuba]

jesustitties was largemarge all along
Dammit! can't you follow the format of just one thread here, JT... *GOSH*

[Willow Sylph]

^^^ hahaha! Damn you, JT!

[Marcus Bales]

Funkytuba spends his free time making sausage sandwiches for his dog, Kubla Khan, who wisely doesn't ask to see just how those sandwiches are made. Funky and Kubla picnic down by the sacred river Alph in the meadow just before it runs under that stately pleasure dome and then on down to the sunless sea.

[Marcus Bales]

Willow Sylph is long and lean
And only very rarely seen;
She rides wild willow like a horse
By metamorphosis, of course:
From tree to tree she glides her way
Each one a momentary stay
Against confusion with the air
When we can see her, shimmering, there.

[Marcus Bales]

Lapietra goes from church to church looking for hot guys, who she then takes back to her studio, one by one, to try out as models for her twinkie sculptures. She's running out of money to pay for spar varnish, though, to keep them from falling apart, so any contributions will be gratefully received.

[Marcus Bales]

Xfox is a travelling salesperson for Donna Summers Records, Inc, and persuades receptionists to let her in to see the boss by giving coupons for hair weaves at local hair salons she's persuaded to play disco music. She never reflects sadly on the gullibility of human beings, because she's glad that that means she can get away with almost anything.

[Marcus Bales]

Dinzdale is the name of a famous European battlefield, and not a person at all. That's why in all his posts you hear him murmuring "I am the grass". It has nothing to do with marijuana at all.

[Marcus Bales]

Daverbee hosts the monthly Weinerdog Segway Races, in which souped-up Segways compete on a closed track with Dachshunds. Betting is illegal, so make sure you know your bookie. You wouldn't want it to get around that you went to jail for betting on Longbody Diamondpaws to beat Runet on his customized Norwegian Viking Segway!

[priceyfatprude]

The male supermodel Hansel in the movie ZOOLANDER was modeled after Marcus Bales. No one knows he was a German supermodel. And he'd like to keep it that way. Until now, that is. His specialty was thong underwear, along w/being a hand model. In fact, most of that movie was based on his life, but he's too shy & embarrassed to ever say so.

And he loves dachshunds. Illegally. :eek:

[craig johnston]

i don't wanna play any more. i'm resigning in a huff.
i HATE elton john with every fibre in my body.
can't i be adolf hitler or something instead?
please?
:(

[Marcus Bales]

Craig Johnston doesnt' drive a Huff, which is an impressively large German car that exudes an important amount of hydrocarbon waste when one presses the accelerator to speed away; he drives a Snit, a much smaller and style-less French make the exhaust of which smells of elderberries.

[Marcus Bales]

Priceyfatprude is not pricey nor fat nor a prude, she just plays one on the internet. Paid an astronomical sum by ZeFrank to be the butt of humor around here, when she gets tired of fame and fortune she takes a break and posts as Jesustitties.

[Marcus Bales]

12"razormix imports fleas from Spain at great cost, dries them in a Wolfgang Puck food dehydrator, and grinds them to powder by pouring the fleas out onto mirrors and running over them repeatedly with Hot Wheels cars. He then separates it into piles with a razor blade. The resultant product he packages in chewing tobacco tins and sells not for silver or for gold but coin of coppery shine -- and that will purchase nine. What is it for? No one knows, but his marketing campaign is sheer genius. All it says on the can is 12". He makes no claims whatever for his product. And a good thing, too.

[trisherina]

12"razormix is my daughter. She's an extremely precocious toddler with calico hair in patches of red, brunette, and blonde. She favours onesies over two piece clothing despite the fact that she toilet trained herself almost a year ago, at nine months. Her favourite past time is washing spiders down the garden while chanting passages from the Rubaiyat. I've refrained from pointing out the resultant sinkhole until now, but today will have to be the day; I heard the sump pump go off at dawn.

[Mary]

everyone here eats meow mix for breakfast.

[Marcus Bales]

Trisherina hasn't seen the sun in years. Her alabaster skin shines like the seat of my blue serge suit. Her contrasting long dark hair and habit of wearing evening dress at all times makes her look like the ideal Poe heroine, without the dying of a dread wasting disease part.

[Marcus Bales]

Mary, on the other hand, has skin like an old saddle from chasing the sun around the globe. Unfair as it sounds, winning the lottery after inheriting her father's tar and feather business fortune hasn't slowed her down at all.

[craig johnston]

marcus bales gets out enough.
:rolleyes:

[Max Headroom]

Zenbabe is having an affair with me, Frieda is green with envy

[zero]

,



yesterday i was playing in her majesty teh queen's big gardens well i think i prolly must've hit the ball too hard because one of the windows got broken oops! but don't worry i've got it covered o no your royal majesty it was maximus bales - it's the fuken culture baby!! he shouted


,

[Marcus Bales]

If that was Zero then Zero is no one other than Camilla Parker-Bowles -- for it was she who banged too hard and broke the window! You should have seen the grey men run, too. One of them quoted the famous line the housekeeper in Arles said when he opened Vincent's package, too: "What's this 'ere?"

[craig johnston]

for it was she who banged too hard and broke the window!

oh my god, what an appalling image!
:eek:

[Clytie]

Daverbee, of course, is following Frieda around and Runet is getting angry since he thinks of Frieda as his own personal property which makes Clytie sad because she's yearned for Runet since first she saw his shapely naked ass against the snow. What orchid?

where for art thou RuneT? ;)

[Clytie]

Coffee is Stephen King.
Marcus Bales is Dave Barry.
Craig Johnston is Elton John. A butch Elton John, to be sure, but Elton John nonetheless.
lala is actually Anais Nin brought back from the dead by Rap Rob who is actually Raymond Chandler brought back from the dead by priceyfatprude who is actually Garrison Keillor.
I'm Dan Rather.


you heard wrong...I am Garrison Keillor

[craig johnston]

^^^^^^
he's probably pissed on some ski slope wearing nothing
but a pair of antlers.
:rolleyes:

[Clytie]

hoooooot ;)

[Marcus Bales]

Max Headroom was born to a poor but wealthy family after he died intestate. He inherited everything he'd ever had, and now sponsors Clytie on Prairie Home Companion.

[funkytuba]

Marcus Bales is a brewer in Mackay, ID. His creations won't be in your local megamart anytime soon as "Goat Piss Ale" and "Smeg Stout" aren't exactly all that marketable as names. His spare time is spent fashioning custom fletchings for his dart collection. You don't want to play him in darts, not because he's so great at it... to the contrary, he sucks so bad that the medical center in Butte City has coined the phrase "pincushion syndrome" to describe injuries from anyone unlucky enough to engage him in a game of cricket.

[Gatsby]

Eftuba splits his time between his almond grove in southern California, his cocoa grove in west Africa, and his production plant ("CocoaNuts") which melds the two crops into the perfect food - chocolate covered almonds.

His wife makes all the money.

[Hyakujo's Fox]

Gatsby was once the toast of Paris. Things soured after they realised she thought she was in Stockholm.

[craig johnston]

hatischoo fox is a gogo girl at 'la vie en rose' nightspot in
wallopmabuckit, near the border between queensland and
south australia. the audience tend to throw beer cans at
the stage as a sign of appreciation. h.fox's act involves
a tu tu, some rubber hosing and a cucumber, and is very
popular. she often comes home bandaged after the crowd
have shown their affection.

[Marcus Bales]

Gatsby has been too busy to post on Zefrank because she's been out in the field catching UFOs again -- though of course after she catches them they are merely FOs. She particularly likes the ones from Aldebaran because they're crunchy with a raisin-like tang, and they're excellent dipped in chocolate fondue.

[Marcus Bales]

Funkytuba can't get any sleep since two Tuesdays ago when he dreamed his new translation from the Medieval French of Villon's Ballade "des dames de temps jadis" because, unfortunately, he can't remember what it is.

[Marcus Bales]

Skip Intro enjoys a quiet glow of satisfaction when people find out he's fully dressed.

[daverbee]

Craig Johnston doesnt' drive a Huff, which is an impressively large German car that exudes an important amount of hydrocarbon waste when one presses the accelerator to speed away; he drives a Snit, a much smaller and style-less French make the exhaust of which smells of elderberries.

Craig Johnston farts in your general direction. It turns out he's John Cleese who was imitating Elton John for a sketch.

[Hyakujo's Fox]

I'm not sure if I'm more offended by the fact that after all this time Craig Johnson thinks I'm a woman, or by the fact that for all this time he's been thinking I'm a woman and he hasn't tried to pick me up yet.

[Marcus Bales]

Hyakujo's Fox is not only a woman, she's Catherine Bach -- which is why she's in Wallopmabucket and keeps going to work every night.

[craig johnston]

hatchjob fox - i was trying to pick you up, but very subtly.
db - thanks
;)

[Marcus Bales]

Craig Johnston, now that he knows Hyakujo's Fox is really Catherine Bach, is trying to pick HF up to find out whether Ringo Starr and Yasir Arafat are really the same person. Ever since Arafat died no one's seen Ringo!

[daverbee]

^^^
Actually, that's because Ringo moved to Cleveland and changed his name to Marcus Bales.

[craig johnston]

^^^^
aha, you see it all makes sense now...
:rolleyes:

[Marcus Bales]

As only Daverbee would know, having staged his own assassination in 1980 in order to get out of the limelight!

[Hyakujo's Fox]

That's nonsense, daverbee is Elvis. Craig Johnston is Pete Best, who got dumped in favour of Ringo just before the Beatles hit it big, which is why he hates the Beatles to this day. Marcus Bales is Buddy Holly, who with the Big Boppa and Ritchie Valens fled to Cuba, where Marcus eventually took the name Che Guevera, ultimately resulting in him staging his death for a second time.

[priceyfatprude]

after all this timeHe's only been here 4 months.

CraigJohnston is secretly Nick Rhodes.

[Mary]

Everyone is thinking about running through a hallway naked. As to where that hallway is..that's for me to know and you to find out.

[Hyakujo's Fox]

He's only been here 4 months.

It seems like an eternity. ;)

[Marcus Bales]

Mary has been promising to run through the hall naked for 18 months, now, and every time we get a crowd together she wimps out. People are starting to mutter that maybe some proactive steps should be taken, such as stealing her towel in the shower and pulling the fire alarm.

[priceyfatprude]

It seems like an eternity. ;)HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

"You're So Foxxy" by No Doubt was written for our esteemed friend Mr Hyakujo.

"Fatal Attraction" is one of Marcus Bales favorite films. He watches it at least 3 times a week, munching popcorn and laughing gleefully as Michael Douglas gets the shit scared out of him.

Mary is really my aunt Mary, who is 84 years old & could still kick your ass.

[daverbee]

That's nonsense, daverbee is Elvis.

http://crushi.com/pics_customer/fat_elvis.jpg

Thank yuh ver' much!

[craig johnston]

It seems like an eternity. ;)

how do you think it feels for me? exiled here after i was banned from 'hot asian chix', forced to converse with lowlifes and floozies, vegetarians and skiers. oh god, get me out of here, let me back into the land of sweet young exotic babes, help!
:(


ps i am amazed that anyone actually noticed how long i've been here.

[Marcus Bales]

Single Australian Man seeks Sweet Exotic Babe for conversation about lowlifes, floozies, vegetarians, and skiers.

[craig johnston]

yeah marcus, yo feelin ma pain.
do you know any?
;)

[Marcus Bales]

Hey, when you look like George Clooney, as you do, if you can't get any dates it's your own damned fault!

[craig johnston]

^^^^
oh yeah, i forgot about that.
:rolleyes:

dinzdale is a charming and balanced individual in no need of
psychological help at all. he never swears, is kind to old ladies,
and always has time to help out at his local church. he wears
clean underwear, washes regularly and has no offensive
personal odour.
his personal role model is donny osmond, of whom he says:
'whenever i'm in a difficult situation, like deciding which charity
to give my last 50 cents to, i always try to imagine what donny
would do. i find him a great source of comfort and inspiration.'

[Brynn]

Craig looks so much like George Clooney that he claims to be him whenever asked.

[craig johnston]

brynn is the webmaster at 'hot asian chix'.

[dinzdale]

Craig Johnson is amusing and a hetrosexual icon.

[Brynn]

:D Thanks to Craig's incredible financial support at "hot asian chix" I was finally able to buy a Lamborghini.

[craig johnston]

yes, it's a very educational site if you want to combine cultural and anatomical research. i strongly recommend it. brynn has an inexhausable supply of nubile babes at his or her disposal.

[Marcus Bales]

Brynn has been masquerading as the webmistress of hot asian chix in order to sting Craig Johnston, who, though he looks like George Clooney, is really Pete Townshend doing research on sexual child abuse. Watch for this story in the news!

[daverbee]

Hot Asian Chix is actually a breakfast cereal that Brynn has been marketing online for some time now.

[Marcus Bales]

Daverbee really does think that Hot Asian Chix is actually a breakfast cereal that Brynn has been marketing online for some time now. That Brynn! Is she good or WHAT!?

[daverbee]

Marcus Bales is a public relations genius. He's in charge of making Hot Asian Chix acceptable to mainstream America.
(Try 'em with strawberries and milk!)

[Marcus Bales]

Daverbee is ahead of his time. Able to hold not two but three contradictory beliefs before breakfast, by noon he is often a mass of contradictions, yet he presents the smoothly polished exterior of a man who knows what he is about and why he is about it. Successful at everything to which he turns his hand, and interested in everything, he is fast running out of things to excel at. As a special challenge he's decided to risk everything on making Hot Asian Chix a brand as dominant and well-known as McDonalds or Coca-Cola.

[NimbleMarmoset]

Hot Asian Chix a brand as dominant

they're dominatrix? :eek:

[dinzdale]

Snap, Crackle & Thwack. :)

[craig johnston]

family man dinzdale is a popular member of his local golf club where he
is revered for his cheerful demeanor and helpful manner. he likes to recite
verses from the bible before he tees off, using his trusty niblick.

[zero]

ABOUT A WEEK AGO THERE WAS AN AIR MISS OF TWO HELICOPTERS OVER DUTCHLAND AND OMFG IT WOULD HAVE BEEN MAHOOSIVE DISASTER WERE IT NOT FOR THE EXPERT AIR TRAFFIC CONTROL SKILLS OF FREIDA

[Marcus Bales]

Brynn, Nimble, Dinz, and Davers met three days ago to plan their attempt to scale the great north face of Everest. They pooled their money and bought a sleeping bag. It's going to be interesting.

[daverbee]

We're also sharing a coat. We wear it on alternating days. We borrowed it from Gatsby.
Dinz peed in it in a failed attempt to keep it as his own but forgot that Nimble had brought along some Febreze.
Brynn is in charge of food and now we're going through ten tons of nacho chips without dip. She got a good deal on them because they were past their sell by date.
I'm in charge of transportation. I figure we'll hitchike to Tibet and ask for directions. Right now we're somewhere near Morgantown, West Virginia.
That's all to report on this, our fourth day in the Zemonkey Expedition to the North Face of Everest.

[Brynn]

It seemed like such a good idea to get away from it all at the time.

The first time I'd met Marcus was years ago, in my front yard - I needed a tree surgeon, and he showed up with a saw and a bag of sunflower seeds. He was so taken with the "spirit" of the pine tree growing in front of my upstairs bedroom window that he refused to do any actual pruning, and asked if he could come back and sit in it from time to time, composing poetry. He seemed a little odd, but interesting. For years after, I'd look out and there he was at the most surprising moments, eating sunflower seeds and scribbling furiously. The poetry he left in a knothole was amazing, and I encouraged him to try to get published. By the time Daverbee and I hooked up, he'd lost everything in this quest. Out of intense feelings of guilt, I decided to get away from the whole tree situation.

[craig johnston]

^^^^^
and that was when you founded 'hot asian chix'?

[Marcus Bales]

No, that came later -- first Brynn had to wait for Coffee.

[NimbleMarmoset]

After ordering an adequate chapstick supply for their adventure. . .
there was a knock at the door. . . and therein started the daunting task of interviewing potential Sherpas. . . (this one had a reference from JT)

http://photos10.flickr.com/11874609_f440156752_o.jpg

[Brynn]

Nimblemarmoset took an instant liking to him for his footrubs and campaigned heavily to include him. He also came with a killer recipe for Hot Asian "Chix Party Mix" that involved soy sauce, brown sugar and the same sesame oil he used for footrubs.

[Marcus Bales]

Brynn, Nimble, Dinz, and Davers, still in Morgantown, West Bygod, eating breakfast at Bob Evans, in a glum silence caused by the previous night's constant semi-awake maneuvering to be in the middle of the pile under the sleeping bag, they overhear McCoy Hatfield bragging about his exploits climbing Spruce Knob Mountain.

[Hermione]

zero loves listening to cher while taking bubble baths.

[xfox]

surbhi skips between classes if she's sure nobody is watching. Her friends wonder how she can be so up all the time.

[Hermione]

xfox loves dancing to britney spears songs while wearing spandex

[Marcus Bales]

It's all a cover-up by Surbhi, who is mad as a cut snake that she wasn't invited along on the trek to Spruce Knob Mountain.

[daverbee]

Surbhi is really a 70 year old man living in Ft. Lauderdale. The high point of his day is sitting on a park bench with his best friend Klynne, who is actually a 72 year old man, complaining about the weather.

[Marcus Bales]

Surbhi, determined to get in on the action, persuades a former Vietnam attack helicopter pilot

http://fixitnow.com/images/spindly%20old%20guy%20at%20carter%20notch.JPG

to take her to Spruce Knob Lake to meet the others

http://www.ovis.net/~blemastr/images/spruceknoblakepost-500.jpg

taking her little dog, Corgi Kaite, along:

http://www.welgem.com/kaite%20in%20helicopter.jpg

They follow the highway

http://www.fastlanerocketluge.com/images/Helicopter.JPG

until they get to the lake, where the habits of a lifetime ago overtake the pilot and he clears the landing site with more enthusiasm than Surbhi expected

http://www.dof.virginia.gov/images/helicopter-site-prep-burn.gif

leaving a little more fog and dust in the air than she anticipated, but she takes advantage of it to think long thoughts about deep subjects overlooking the valley while she waits for the others.

http://www.gw3n.com/camping/spruce_knob.JPG

[Hyakujo's Fox]

http://www.icp.org/weegee/images/wg1-67.jpg

Although never formally charged with arson, Marcus Bales admitted to police that had he lived off frankfurters for three weeks after this mysterious blaze broke out.

[daverbee]

http://english.people.com.cn/200407/06/images/0705_221.jpg

Curse his frankfurter eating ways! He burned down Coffee's building!

[craig johnston]

12" razormix is nina hagen. she's just going through a painful separation
from her 20 years younger boyfriend, but still finds time to visit india, sit
in trees and show her knickers at every opportunity.

[daverbee]

"Knickers"...uhhhhhhh huh-huh-huh!

[Clytie]

http://msnbcmedia.msn.com/j/msnbc/Components/Photos/031222/031222_genetic_58yrs_vm12p.vlarge.jpg

daver shows us a pic of himself
!awweee!

[Hermione]

omg did you know that clytie was a member of the spice girls before she was kicked out for flirting with beckham?

[Clytie]

yeow!http://photos7.flickr.com/9548806_225ebac1bd_m.jpg

[Hermione]

there she is... hot spice

[Coffee]

Marcus Bales was arrested last night after being caught once again violating probation while attempting to steal and eat these K-9 Police decoy dogs.
http://www.joe-ks.com/archives_mar_2002/HotDogs.jpg

[daverbee]

Coffee likes tea and drinks it exclusively.

[Marcus Bales]

Right now Coffee and Zefrank have abandoned caution in pursuit of extreme cuisine: the foot of an elusive gastropod - the wild abalone - a rare culinary treasure that cannot be sold legally and is unobtainable at restaurants or fish markets. Though scallop-size farmed abalone is sold commercially, the full-bodied wild red variety is coveted for its size, thickness and delicate flavor, a melt-in-your-mouth, more subtle version of calamari. The only way to obtain it is the hard way: searching treacherous ledges along the shore or diving into the waters north of San Francisco.

http://www.sunsetbeach.co.za/images/diversharp.jpg

[trisherina]

I AM ONE OF THE SQUID OVERLORDS AND I AM VERY UNCOMFORTABLE IN MY EDGAR SUIT

*****END TRANSMISSION*****

[Marcus Bales]

Dear Mr Overlord,

My name is Amy. I am six years old, and I want to know why you're wearing an Edgar suit my daddy wears an Armani suit but he says its very comfortable maybe you should try it.

Amy

[Clytie]

Yesterday the people upstairs came across some large boulders, and have taken to rolling them as far as possible. The game probably dates back several years, and judging by the amount of time they spent engaging in this activity, I'd say there were 4 players, and the winner had to consecutively roll the large rock completely across thier apartment, hitting the wall, 50 times. I have been unable to sleep but at least I can tell you all my feelings dear diary.
Love
Marcus M Bales

[daverbee]

http://www.sirpepsi.com/ricksha1.jpg

Clytie is a ricksha driver in Hong Kong. She weighs 90 pounds and can carry up to 700 total pounds of passengers at a time. She is known as Thunderclap by the other ricksha drivers because of the sound her feet make when they hit the pavement.

[craig johnston]

it's not because of her feet, it's due to the spring onions.

[Marcus Bales]

It's not because she was flirting with Beckham, it's because no one believed that "salt" was a "hot spice" that she got kicked out of the Spice Girls. Besides, Beckham was flirting with her. Here's Clytie with Coffee at last year's Zemonkey party. Oh? You weren't invited? Well, maybe that should tell you something!

http://nawtythings.com/halloween/couples/co7.jpg

[skip intro]

jesus t has been kidnapped by the taliban and is being forced to look at pictures of enlarged testicles and listen to lame stories about drunken pranks.
hopefully he will return chastened and contrite.
:)

[Brynn]

http://stevebriggs.com/darkmaster/images/gallery1/1.jpg

Thanks to XFox's incredible mix of guts and daring, this man is no longer at large. After a late-night rampage through a sleepy beach town, the as yet unidentified man burst into her living room and threatened her. Keeping a cool head, she appeared unfazed and offered him a fresh homemade oatmeal cookie and a glass of milk. Distracted by the treat, he did not manage to escape her massive blow to his head with her favorite antique "chandelier" lamp.
"It was an heirloom from my grandmother that she brought over from the old country. I'd like to think my grammy was watching over me," Miss Fox told T.V. crews and reporters. "Fortunately I had that medieval torture contraption just lying around the house. I'm glad to have finally been able to put it to good use. And to think I almost sold it in a garage sale."

[daverbee]

^^^
The guy is known around here as Marcus Bales.

[daverbee]

Signs outside Dinzdale's favorite bar.
Oh wait, this is the make things up thread...sorry!

[Clytie]

daver drinks from the faucet http://www.youngsteadsaintbernards.com/images/Drinker.jpg

[craig johnston]

^^^
The guy is known around here as Marcus Bales.


where is he? i miss his erudition or whatever you call it.
:)

[NimbleMarmoset]

Craig Johnston's biological (http://photos14.flickr.com/14582344_9e024106ed_o.jpg) Father . . . now we know where his musical talents come from

[lapietra]

NimbleMarmoset's a brilliant non-fiction author just about to unleash a historical novel, first in a stunning four-part portrayal of the life of a woman (loosely based on Marie Antoinette, Lady Randolph Churchill, Ethel Merman, and Madonna) on the world. She will seduce all of A. S. Byatt's readers away, only to have that esteemed writer, secretly a fan, publicly lavish her with high praise and invite her to high tea. She narrowly escapes ingesting a cup of arsenic and goes on to publish many novels, a slender book of poetry, and a treatment of her first four-part fictional history. It's snapped up by Showtime, who create a series based on the novels, which is wildly successful, making the quotes "It's like eating cake for the very first time" and "One is forever throwing away substance for the promise of roses" ubiquitous for *ages*, thereby lengthening everyone's attention spans and leading to the salvation of high culture worldwide.

Trisherina's secretly a dancer for the Ballet Russe. She cleverly disquises this fact by pretending her absences from home and work are due to other circumstances, but her husband and daughter are becoming suspicious. Why, for example, they ask, does Trish have a tutu amongst her suits come back from the dry cleaning? Why do her credit card statements have hundreds of dollars of charges from "Boris's холодная сливк и точный состав этапа"? Why the predeliction for tiaras? Coworkers have questions as well. One recently fielded a call from someone named Slav who left a message saying that her weight was borderline, lifting would soon become an issue, and she needed to either cut out carrots or start smoking. (She now only eats lettuce and cocktail weenies.) She is *that far* away from a principal role, however, and hopes to be able to tell her family soon what she's been up to. She can't exactly remember why she was supposed to keep it a secret, but it seemed important at the time.

[Hermione]

lala was caught with hugh grant in the backseat of a car while he was dating liz hurley.

booyah

[lapietra]

:o

[daverbee]

Surbhi works for National Enquirer.
She's the one who came up with the line, "Inquiring minds want to know."
She also suggested changing the "I" in Inquire for an "E".
National Enquirer spends millions in extra ink costs every year because of this but they don't care.

[NimbleMarmoset]

after cartwheeling (http://www.cartwheelsacademy.com/) so long for her own personal pleasure, lala is discovered by Maestro Fidele Farceur who likens her to the "Vivienne Westwood of Avant Garde Carthwheelers"

http://img144.echo.cx/img144/8791/cartwheels2iy.jpg

[lapietra]

after cartwheeling (http://www.cartwheelsacademy.com/) so long for her own personal pleasure, lala is discovered by Maestro Fidele Farceur who likens her to the "Vivienne Westwood of Avant Garde Carthwheelers"
Oh, my no! You have me mixed up with Clytie ;) I don't cartwheel; I make scowly lemon faces :p

[dinzdale]

I make scowly lemon faces :p

Only when you're on the catwalk, Tyra ;)

[lapietra]

heeeee :D

Our esteemed Dinzdale is actually Douglas Adams who, with a minor amount of reconstructive surgery, managed to duck the inevitable onslaught of crazed lunatic fans overwhelmed by the wonderfulness of the newest film version of his best-loved work by faking his own death and settling into a relaxing routine of pubcrawling and playing with supermodels, which is *entirely* different from what he was doing before. Before checking out he opened up a trust fund for himself in a private offshore banking account and will be living off the proceeds of the film (deposited by his "ex"manager, who's secretly in the loop) while releasing numerous "found" works "posthumously". He's certain that if he's ever found out it will be far too late to hold him accountable for it, and is really enjoying the weather in Texas. "I've never experienced *so many* sunny days in a row," he said recently. "Stores actually carry sunblock here year-round!". His most difficult adjustments to his new life: the lack of "u"'s in the Texan spelling of words, and the dearth of good tea.

[NimbleMarmoset]

but that's Clytie and you doing cartwheels. . . . see. . . you're the one making scowly/lemon faces. and because of your scowly/lemon faces, the Maestro took notice of you. . . ta dahhhh!! Clytie does cartwheels for the sheer love and joy of it.

Oh, my no! You have me mixed up with Clytie ;) I don't cartwheel; I make scowly lemon faces :p

[lapietra]

That is very true. Clytie is a joyful cartwheeler... I only do it for money :cool: :p

[Hyakujo's Fox]

I just got a postcard from Guatemala: Marcus Bales and Craig Johnston have eloped! With each other!

[topcat]

^^^i hope they are happy.

[lapietra]

TopCat is a superhero whose special power is the ability to be everywhere at once. He may not be the strongest or fastest or be able to fly or become invisible, but, man, does he come through in a pinch. Why, just the other day, I forgot my lunch, and I was really hungry, and all of a sudden there was TopCat with my little brown bag. I was so grateful! Others have reported that he has picked up their children from school when they were stuck in traffic, delivered medicine to the elderly and infirm, and turned over grilled cheese sandwiches just before they burn. He doesn't wear a cape or anything, although every once in awhile he puts on a nice cologne, and maybe wears a hat when it's cold.

[daverbee]

lala, you are better at this than anyone.
Oh, wait. Once again I forget this is the We Make Things Up About Each Other thread...
lala, you're not very good at making things up about each other.

[lapietra]

Daverbee is actually a WWII concentration camp survivor. He's much older than he looks. He attributes his youthful appearance to the coping techniques he learned from his fellow prisoners, and would like to teach them to you, too. He doesn't want any money in return, for himself, anyway - however, he would like you to make a donation to the Museum of Tolerance in Los Angeles, the 1939 Club, Elie Wiesel Foundation for Humanity, or any other organization dedicated to Holocaust education, documentation, justice, and the memory of the 6 million Jews who perished, some of whom were good friends of his.

[NimbleMarmoset]

^^^

http://img282.echo.cx/img282/4416/oscar0ze.gif

[lapietra]

NmblM has dedicated herself to the thankless task of revealing of all those purported "image hosting" sites that do not actually host images but swallow them greedily, licking their chopses and dribbling red "x"'s on unsuspecting message boards. Once she has completed this project, she will commence cataloguing all instances of W's incorrect pronunciation of the word "nuclear" and using them in some form of shockingly self-revealing performance art. Courageous, that one.

[Hyakujo's Fox]

Lala invented the hokey-pokey. Of course, it's been made a lot more respectable since the early days.

[Hyakujo's Fox]

Marcus Bales was the only person who was a member of both the Manhattan Project and Manhattan Transfer.

[lapietra]

Coasting on the popularity of food items containing beneficial properties, Hyakujo's Fox created a kind of beer made from green tea which, though it tasted horrible, was wildly popular for about three months, when it was suddenly discovered that it caused cancer in rats consuming nine times their body weight per day of the substance, and the beverage was banned. (Incidentally, the stuff tasted pretty good to the rats.) It's now only available on the black market and in some small villages in Mexico and Jamaica, where they like to use it in a frozen margarita-type drink called "piscongelado", which consists of the beer frappe'd with ice, fresh pineapple, and dark rum. It tastes a lot better that way, and it gets you wasted in no time flat. :D

[daverbee]

lala recently returned from safari in the Serengeti where she is now credited with the elimination of seven species of monkey, all the lions with the exception of one which disguised itself as a poodle, so thoroughly upsetting the elephant population that they have all asked for political asylum in Sweden, and setting US policy in the area back at least 100 years.
Africa has asked her if she can visit Washington, DC next, or maybe Crawford, Texas..

[NimbleMarmoset]

§olomon has a wicked sense of humor

[§olomon]

Nimble Thighs
http://img276.echo.cx/img276/456/nimblemarmoset0aq.jpg

Is the love child of http://www.uglypeople.nl/front/celeb.jpg
and
http://rockandrollbadboy.com/images/2courtneylove.jpg

with a splash of
http://humour.blague.free.fr/page/photo/grande/exposition-anus.jpg

[Avalon]

Play nice, SolomonTitties :)

[§olomon]

solomon who
and i dont have titties i have been working out

[lapietra]

lala recently returned from safari in the Serengeti where she is now credited with the elimination of seven species of monkey, all the lions with the exception of one which disguised itself as a poodle, so thoroughly upsetting the elephant population that they have all asked for political asylum in Sweden, and setting US policy in the area back at least 100 years.
Africa has asked her if she can visit Washington, DC next, or maybe Crawford, Texas..
I didn't know monkeys reacted that way to chocolate... I would take it back if I could :eek: :(

[NimbleMarmoset]

Stopping by Trish's i-have-to-move-and-get-rid-of-crap garage sale, Clytie reinacts her visit to the The Mouth of Truth (http://photos8.flickr.com/12656929_cd599fc0f9_o.jpg) of Santa Maria in Cosmedin.

[Hyakujo's Fox]

OMG Craig Johnston just read the votes from Berlin... AND FRIEDA HAS WON THE EUROVISION SONG CONTEST!!! ...with a poptastic rendition of "Hassle Me Tonight"!

[daverbee]

^^^
A predictable result considering Rune, ally, chuckie egg, and zero were the judges.

[NimbleMarmoset]

to the sheer delight of her fellow academicians, Surbhi patents the first "keg Head" design

http://img228.echo.cx/img228/2930/keghead2mz.gif

[daverbee]

http://www.nature.com/news/2002/020729/images/shark_160.jpg

Beale walks through the halls of justice.

[NimbleMarmoset]

zreo's love child :)
http://www.ncf.carleton.ca/~ek867/bjork.jpg

[karma_queen]

^ is that a young bjork?? rather lookylikey if it's not!

[NimbleMarmoset]

^ hasn't changed much, has she?

[daverbee]

This is what Marcus Bales wants you to think he looks like:


http://www.heavysports.com/emagimages/fireman.jpg


This is the sad reality:


http://www.klondikemarketing.com/images/ugly150.jpg

[NimbleMarmoset]

swimmiing out

http://www.thetimecapsule.org.uk/TimeCapsule/Images/out_to_sea_cornwall_near_fo.jpg

sky can crack

http://www.51wall.com/landscape/lightening/pic/lightening_001.jpg

places no one has beenhttp://photos12.flickr.com/15978786_0a7556b49f_o.jpg http://photos12.flickr.com/15978786_0a7556b49f_o.jpg

http://www.ski-epic.com/area51_images/area51_parking1_1280x1024.jpg

This one's a no brainer:

lsak of immagination and loss to nill grasp of true wit
feces-obsesed
passe'white fae Kabuki face mask

[xfox]

http://www.expertees.com/store/catalog/images/Super%20Mom.jpg

Oh, I forgot, this is supposed to be made up. Sorry.

[Brynn]

^^^awww, thanks sweetie-pie. Every mom needs to be told that once in a while whether it's true or not! :o

[Coffee]

Nimble Marmoset has amazing powers of concentration and organization and NEVER gets confused about what thread she is posting in. :p

[venusupnorth]

http://zeroboy.com/images/wwZero_card_color.jpg

Performance artist, stand-up comic & "vocal acrobat" Zero Boy recounts his zany adventures in Zeroland through a unique blend of sound and mime, the results being something akin to a performed comic book.

One of a number of ongoing side-projects, Jack Zero, Cracker Jack Shot (http://zeroboy.com/info.html#)

[Brynn]

:eek:
XFox has just saved my precious children from certain death.
Here she is taking a final puff before lighting the fuse
that will blow up their kidnappers' hideout.

[NimbleMarmoset]

Zreo and Nimbles separated at birth. . and continue to be so. they like it this way.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v208/bevelheadgrl/kidsFA.gif

[Clytie]

hyakujo's fox is running for the Senate
beale wears a size 14 shoe
gatsby's weakness Nutter Butter bars
lala loves hard boiled eggs
chuckie recycles because she cares!
venusupnorth always speaks in run-on sentances
trishers invented press on nails
frieda's real name is Bertha
topcat is in real life very big
pfp was the first to use an oversized handbag as a weapon in her self defense class
maxheadroom creates new and interesting hairstyles for dogs
marcusb is an expert paper airplane maker
madasacutsnake didnt really visit trish...its all in her head
surbhi and gatsby are sisters
brynn looks adorable in pink!
§olomon milks goats
skip intro's favorite cheese is linburgher
des pommes is a professional wrestler complete with purple spandex
sammygirl is obsessed with rasterbating
Jade wrote "its a razzle dazzle day" from Petes Dragon
Tiki Stanley is a tease

[Brynn]

brynn looks adorable in pink!
:D
Actually, this is true. I look completely adorable. But it has to be coral-pink to go with my red hair, like what Bree does to such great effect in "Desperate Housewives."

Clytie (and I'm sure this has been suggested to her before) is actually a trusted CIA operative now that she's past her wild years. As a teenager, she inspired the film "La Femme Nikita" while on a hitch-hiking stint through Europe with a french boyfriend who horrified her diplomat parents.

[venusupnorth]

Zenbabe has been known to defeat the laws of gravity, was last seen running up a wall.

Clytie is a small time thief in Queens, New York. She has a pitbull dog and a Harley Motorcycle.

Bealeblues is really a single mom trying to make it as a gospel singer. Has a secret crush on Pat Robertson and has been known to stalk him in the past.

Dinzdale is living in a trailer in West Virginia, likes to go huntin' and shoot at beer cans.

Brynn is a rich Japanese lawyer that can not stand children or women. Is dating one of the Queer Eye Guys.

Frieda is really working undercover for the FBI, she even has Zeefrank fooled. She's gathering information about the Zee monkeys to use in the FBI's database about Personality Disorders.

Lala is known to be abusive to her lovers and posts really long descriptive messages in every thread, she would never dare to use a smilee or 2 words.

Avalon is a scientologist and is hoping to get a few people on here turned on to the faith. Has been known to kidnapp Zemonkeys and turn them over to Tom Cruise.

Smarty Pants is really a cross-dresser and is married to some bitch named Randy?

Coffee is a minister in Harlem New York, he only logs on here so he can get a good laugh at how stupid whitee can be.

Daverbee is an abusive husband that never shows anyone consideration, has been known to slam doors on old handicapped people.

Topcat is a cat, he amazes his master by logging on here each night and typing on his own. He Was last seen in Moscow at the opera smoking a cigar.

Solomon has bigger breasts than I do, Bitch!

Madasacutsnake is really the owner of Paypal, has been known to push her services all over the internet.

[Clytie]

daver isnt abusive...awe :( he is just misunderstood

[daverbee]

Smarty Pants is...married to some bitch named Randy?

Daverbee...has been known to slam doors on old handicapped people.

Madasacutsnake is really the owner of Paypal, has been known to push her services all over the internet.

Must I continue to remind everybody that this is supposed to be the "We Make Up Things About Each Other" thread? Nothing true here, OK?

Also, keep in mind I only slam doors on old handicapped people if they're in my way.

[venusupnorth]

LOL, trying to picture Daverbee being mean to old people :D

[Frieda]

you got beale and dinz mixed up!

[xfox]

http://fux0r.phathookups.com/gallery/sp-smoking.jpg
XFox has just saved my precious children from certain death.
Here she is taking a final puff before lighting the fuse
that will blow up their kidnappers' hideout.

Please don't blow my cover like this, Brynn.

[§olomon]

clytie enjoys rimjobs from rabid animals and penusupyourassnorth films it

[jamiman]

you are a fatty boom boom

[venusupnorth]

you are a fatty boom boom

Like Daverbee said, nothing in this thread is true. Solomon just hasn't gotten laid in a while so his sexual aggression is taking over :D

[Clytie]

LOL, trying to picture Daverbee being mean to old people :D

he is an old people!

geeZer!

[funkytuba]

you got beale and dinz mixed up!
Dammit, Fired!!! you beat me to it!

[venusupnorth]

The Funkytuba is really a peace loving citizen that does volunteer work on weekends, has been spotted serving food in soup kitchens across America.

[daverbee]

He also entertains homeless people with tuba concerts. They wish he would stop.

[xfox]

Daverbee has an all cream colored outfit that makes him look just like Tom Wolf. And that's fine, except in the winter when everybody else is wearing blue, gray or black.

[priceyfatprude]

When no one else is home, Jesus Titties cranks up "Danger Zone" by Kenny Loggins & pretends he is Tom Cruise in Top Gun.

[NimbleMarmoset]

^ ^ ^ i thought this was the "make-up" thingey thread. :rolleyes:

[sparticle]

Priceyfatprude is Donatella Versace's lesser-known younger sister and is on the design council at the House of Versace. She looks just like her older sis only not as sun-damaged and is much more popular with the younger coturiers.

[priceyfatprude]

YOU CREZZY OLD BEETCH! GEDDOUUTTTTTT!!!!!

[sparticle]

:eek: :p heh heh heh...

[priceyfatprude]

Ok I foun dees peecture of us lust New Year's Eve--how dare you wear the same dress as me, beetch?

http://www.suprmchaos.com/vh1_maya-donatella_101502.jpg

[sparticle]

HAH! You teenk maybe you're d' only one got a sense of style, beetch? My Gudd, if it isn't Before and Effter!

[priceyfatprude]

Fodder & moel enjoy karaoke night together quite often--"their" song?? Leather & Lace by Stevie NIcks & Don Henley

[priceyfatprude]

zefrank could go 2 weeks wihout logging onto the internet

topcat has a deep dark secret--no one knows he collects Dave Clark Five on vinyl. UNTIL NOW.

Jack Flanders is a prison warden. She is in charge of letting everyone out for recess every day.

Amanda goes into AOL chatrooms under the screenname Amanda Huggenkiss.

Brynn is a famous novelist whose initials are JACKIE COLLINS.

[Marcus Bales]

Hyakujo's Fox travels the world starring as Freddie in "Chess, the Musical" in community theaters under a string of assumed names.

[Hyakujo's Fox]

Marcus Bales has been exclusive hairstylist to both Benny and Björn since the early seventies.

[priceyfatprude]

Mister Foxxy thinks no one knows he is really George Michael.

[priceyfatprude]

bump

[topcat]

priceyfatprude is actually a skinny chinese man that post in his bikini underwear.

[Brynn]

As a child, topcat loved drawing pictures of the inside of his garbage can, and loved to trick it out with a screening room, pool table, a jacuzzi, a full gourmet kitchen and a cozy velvet and silk bedroom that looked like the inside of the "I Dream of Jeannie" bottle.

Priceyfatprude is actually over a hundred and fifty years old, and was the real life inspiration for "Babette" in "Babette's Feast," the Danish movie adapted from the Isak Dinesan story.

[Odbe]

The post reply button is having an affair with the navigation bar.

[priceyfatprude]

Odbe is actually a kid I had summer school math with in the 9th grade.

rmr loves to pitch water balloons at passersby off her balcony.

brynn tries on swimwear over her pants, she is that afraid of germs.

marcus bales was arrested for shoplifting kitty litter & trying to take it home in his pants.

zero loves opera & enjoys sitting in the bubble bath screaming along with maria callas while he enjoys a glass of pernod.

audreyvgs once killed a man just to watch him die.

jesustitties had an affair with chuck norris.

coffee drinks iced tea.

[Coffee]

Topcat is a skinny frenchman posting from Schenectedy where his funds ran out during his USA vacation. He has a flukey keyboard with keys that randomly change letters and a permanently broken shift key.

Priceyfatprude was Miss Wisconsin Cheese 2002, and still does occasional charity speaking events where she always reiterates her wish that she would like improve the conditions of third world countries via donations of cheese.

[Hyakujo's Fox]

Dinzdale once managed an all girl band entirely consisting of his ex-girl friends. They had a bit of trouble coming up with a name for the group but Dinzdale thought about it for a while and came up with a inspired choice (http://www.shaggs.com/album_potw.html).

[priceyfatprude]

Hyakujo's Fox left his basement once.

Avalon begins every day with a big green margarita.

[zero]

i really quite vividly remember when demonical66 sent me a pm informing me of the time when he was on his holydays in a land called FL and got really really blooterd aff his heid and wanted to feed the alligators so he went to the chickenmonger's and bought some chickens but when he woke up the news was on and the man was saying that someone had kidnapped a baby and taken it to a swamp and fed it to an alligator named old knobbly bits. "yeah!" boasted demonical66 at the end of the pm "that was me!"

[12"razormix]

zero's desktop background has rarely more than 3 colours

[zero]

i personally was at 12'brianrix's house and i was watching the news and this time the man was jabbering on about a burglar who was robbing all the jewelry shops and as i listened they were describing 12"brianrix. omg! then they said she was seen with an orange handbag a huge pair of black something i couldn't quite catch maybe it was gloves yes that's it gloves.. well anyway i got up and found those very things in her bucket with the diamonds but i'm not going to turn her over to the bizzies because she's actually quite a nice person.

[12"razormix]

brynn is really ivana trump!

[zero]

slainte mohr!

btw have you heard the reason rmr hasn't been seen for a week is because she got the sack from her job for setting off the fire alarm and when they called her in she protested "no sir it was a wee cornish pixie pulled the fire alarm, not me" but it didn't work. (rmr's excuse that is, not the fire alarm)

[Ineptsuperhero]

That zero may be a supervillan bent on world domination, but is having trouble with the demands portion of the take over.

[zero]

she's kept silent all these years but now it's time for the truth to be told so brace yourselves everyone. up on the grassy knoll, yes, it was auntie aubrey.

[auntie aubrey]

it's a little known fact that our very own zero is the sole possessor of the world's largest private collection of "snack foods that look like things." if you ask nicely he may give you a tour, and the experience really hits its peak with the presentation of a macadamia nut that bears a strong resemblance to the profile of marlon brando.

a word of advice, though: if he asks you whether you're interested in taking the adult tour, politely decline.

[Tunesmith]

In her spare time, auntie aubrey has gone into interior decorating and is now hard at work at her series of lawn chairs entitled "Octopi and You".

[daverbee]

Tunesmith works for a mirror factory testing "Objects In Mirror Are Closer Than They Appear" mirrors to see if the objects really are closer.

[Tunesmith]

daverbee spends his time making LOLCATS and distributing them anonymously online

[Marcus Bales]

Tunesmith lives in a luxurious cardboard box behind the bushes by the Science Center, and sneaks in to play the air organ with the foam paddles. His rendition of "Mr Bojangles" is really heart-breaking.

[brightpearl]

Marcus is distantly related to me.

[craig johnston]

pearly has a large, but dull, stamp collection which she shows to
passers-by for a small fee.

[auntie aubrey]

international intelligence channels have turned up substantial evidence to support the belief that craig johnston has an ill-tempered arch nemesis named jaig crohnston.

[lukkucairi]

auntie aubrey has an advanced degree in defenestration, and she takes her tea cold, with bison blood and molasses. she is also a psychic of prodigious extent.

[craig johnston]

she is also a psychic of prodigious extent.

we knew that.
cos we are too.

[Hyakujo's Fox]

Spoiler warning!

lukkucairi is Luke Skywalker's father (no, I don't know either)



meanwhile, craig johnston likes to let his troubles melt away by playing the ukelele.

[lukkucairi]

I tried to warn you... http://www.natbikes.com/images/onion.JPG

Hyakujo's Fox is a purveyor of black-market exclamation points, and is the sin to craig johnston's cos.

so...where's the tan? oh wait, apparently it's on my arm :p

[Veruki]

as you can she from the above picture, lukkucairi has given up trying to rule the universe and now has a cooking show called "Practical Cooking with the Dark Side". She hopes to take over the industry........ squashing Martha Stewart is just an added bonus...

[Tunesmith]

Veruki once bought out a nearby department store's stock of Wite-Out™ because she was afraid the company would go belly-up.

[Veruki]

Tunes has a Post-It Note fetish and request all his conquests to strategically place them on their "private" areas.

;)

[Tunesmith]

Veruki is very defensive of her stapler and feels uncomfortable when other people use it.

I didn't feel like being creative with the office supplies. :( Hope you haven't seen Office Space, Veruki. :rolleyes:

[Veruki]

lol i love that movie, though i have to agree with you on the supplies...

Ok people, Tunes is still next

[lukkucairi]

Tunesmith is the last living native speaker of the original Indo-European language. His family is from Andorra, where they have lived in a small cave for the last seven millennia. Recently, they got broadband internet access.

[craig johnston]

lukkucairi is the last remaining descendant of a group of finnish whale hunters who were stranded in the west indies in 1547. they kept their finnish traditions over the centuries and invented nokia in 1871. as no one around could understand their language the mobile phone had to wait more than a hundred years before becoming a world wide phenomenon.

[Frieda]

Mr Johnston is the spitting image of Mr T! same hair, same gold :eek:

[T.I.P.]

Frieda is a canadian secret agent who infiltrated a gang of russian mobsters running a photocopy machine scam in Maastricht during the summer of 2002. She also has a graduate diploma in cheese tasting.

[zero]

^"terence in paris" my arse, his name's twitchell and he's in peebles - nobody goes there it's so rubbish

[T.I.P.]

:mad: i am annoyed at these insinuations that there exists even a smidgen of doubt as to my true geographic whereabouts.

I therefore give you undeniable proof of my honesty - terence in front of the tour eiffel:
http://www.foiled.co.uk/hitch/hitch1g.jpg


..um... zero is next, please

[lukkucairi]

zero wins prizes for making macrame owls.

[brightpearl]

http://a7.vox.com/6a00c2252369f3604a00cdf3a3ff5fcb8f-320pi

I'm just saying.

[zero]

undeniable proof
http://www.foiled.co.uk/hitch/hitch1g.jpg


^undeniable bollocks morelike. that's peebles. i recognize the distinctive peebles style of garden fence, and that could be anyone in a fuzzy self-timer picture standing in their back yard in front of a back-projection onto the wall of peebles town hall.

[brightpearl]

^^You're a one to criticize photographic evidence, Z. ;)

'Course I don't have much room myself.

Lessee a pic of you and Nessie, then.

[craig johnston]

brightpearl's disco stallioness routine won her many awards in her youth, but it got her into trouble when she stamped through the stage at honcho's nitespot in cincinatti revealing a huge stash of drugs and weapons, which had been hidden by mike 'honcho' salvatore, the city's most feared criminal.
she got out of the fix by doing her famed high kick move and escaping down a fire escape.

[brightpearl]

That is not true.

It was Impanema, Brazil. They wrote a song about it.
<object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/DmV0TcTNJ3o"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/DmV0TcTNJ3o" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350"></embed></object>

[Marcus Bales]

Brightpearl researches and constructs miniature dioramas of ancient military encounters using Airfix soldier sets she hand-paints under a magnifying lens light in her basement workshop. Her way with wounds and scars has won her the recognition of the cognoscenti, as well as those who like that sort of thing and who know what's good. In 2005 she won the Single Hair Brush D'Or from the International Federation of Miniature Diorama Painters Convention in Dijon, France. Her acceptance speech, even allowing for the fact she gave it in English, was widely regarded as both inarticulate and inaudible. She lives in Cuyahoga Falls with her baffled family, two cats, and an odd half-visible blobby thing that seems to ooze up and down the stairs blubbering for its friend, Slinky.

[auntie aubrey]

marcus bales' lifelong ambition is to become the world's greatest taxidermist.

by any... means... necessary.

[Tunesmith]

That is not true.

It was Impanema, Brazil. They wrote a song about it.
<object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/DmV0TcTNJ3o"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/DmV0TcTNJ3o" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350"></embed></object>

That was beautiful...

Thank you, brightpearl.

I hope someday to see the stallioness routine that inspired such an amazing song. ;)

[craig johnston]

one of tuney's great great grandfathers was a rabbit.
that's why, when auntie aubrey came round yesterday
with one of her famous triple fudge chocolate cream
cakes, he refused, and ate a lettuce instead.

well, that's the only explanation i can think of.

[Marcus Bales]

Taxidermy

Some were intelligent, others were fair,
Some endowed schools, some did robbery;
But one was so elegant even the air
Would gather more tightly around her with care
To cling for a moment invisibly where
Her gracefulness gave even breathing a flair
While everyone envied its lingering there
Where all of the rest of us only could stare
And even that air envied what she would wear
As closer to heaven since closer to bare;
No, none of the many could ever compare
To silky soft sweet Auntie Aubrey.

[craig johnston]

macrus blaes' user title is somewhst misleading.
he may be a poet, but nobody would describe him as fit, and
he does actually like nascars and other motor sports.

also, he did some work for mike 'honcho' salvatore in the late
eighties, reconstructing two of his henchmen who had been
gunned down in a gangland shoot out. 'the honch' keeps them
on the porch to scare away kids at halloween.