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-   -   Post something that made you laugh today. (http://www.zefrank.com/bulletin_new/showthread.php?t=4329)

priceyfatprude 03-24-2004 05:54 AM

Post something that made you laugh today.
 
SIZZLINGCROTCH: man
SIZZLINGCROTCH: I cant cancel an AOL subscription online
JakeD409: try to do it over the phone
SIZZLINGCROTCH: no cuz they want my screenname when i cancel
SIZZLINGCROTCH: so I gotta be like "yeah, my screenname is SIZZLINGCROTCH"


source: http://www.jaked409.net/archive.html

amfromme 03-24-2004 06:33 AM



Got this yesterday and wore it to work. I think it's pretty funny. Ya know it's like Yea for Halliburton! Yippee!

What really made me laugh is all the people who ask me what Halliburton is. One guy thought Halliburton was a pop singer.

RuneT 03-24-2004 09:37 AM

BRATWURST

Audreyvgs 03-24-2004 12:57 PM

There's this chicken, it sits on my outside bar, and pecks at the window for me to give it something to eat. I open the window a crack, and give it the crust of my toast. It takes it, and throws it off the bar, thinkin it's goanna go down there and eat it. But there's 20 more under there, and they take it and run off. She looks at me again. Stupid chicken!


then i go get the hose. Bye chickens!!!!!!!!!!

RuneT 03-24-2004 01:03 PM

You got to love them.

zenbabe 03-24-2004 01:23 PM

Botox in a box

AllegroNg 03-24-2004 01:46 PM

nysaf48: omg DUDE
nysaf48: i just went into my moms room and woke her up our of a deep sleep
nysaf48: and i said "hey mom, if i'm feeling up to it tomorrow, can I go somewhere"
nysaf48: and she rolled over and said "no, dont let anyone feel you up, thats bad. Well no....actually, its not SO bad"


This is the best thing ever PFP!:) Thanky

zenbabe 03-24-2004 01:54 PM

Feet Needed for Rave Art
 
Reply to: floormatt1969@yahoo.com
Date: 2004-03-22, 6:55AM MST


Seeking feet to trample me as brutally as you'd like. the idea of the video is revenge, so we need to see me being crushed. you get a release form in case i get hurt you are not responsible. taping in all 50 states, win an extra $100 for being the most brutal in your state. 310-849-4229 we are based in LA, but begin traveling in April. please e-mail age, ht, weight, pic (if possible), and an idea of how intense you'd like to trample. thanks


Compensation: $20/hour

nycwriters 03-24-2004 03:36 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by amfromme
What really made me laugh is all the people who ask me what Halliburton is. One guy thought Halliburton was a pop singer.
Oh good grief! hahahahahahaha .....

Frieda 03-24-2004 04:28 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by RuneT
BRATWURST

lapietra 03-24-2004 04:47 PM

Somebody said in a meeting today that I was organized.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Coffee 03-24-2004 05:50 PM


Frieda 03-24-2004 05:55 PM

my boss asking me today:

"hey *******, are you watching porn or something? you've got this grin on your face and it sure shows what you're thinking.. "

rapscalious rob 03-24-2004 06:34 PM

this:

Quote:

3. The Fun Board decided that the Barrel of Monkeys was equivalent to 15 minutes of rather good stand up comedy, 5 minutes of a really good Doom game, half an orgasm, 7 good sandwiches, half of a joint or a six-pack of good beer. It was, however, nowhere as good as the acid they took as comparison. Meeting called on account of severe lack of coherence suffered after the last comparison.
(from http://www.galactic-guide.com/articles/6U11.html)

daverbee 03-24-2004 06:49 PM

This from I Am Eating My Husband's Soul:

It's just been such beautiful spring weather! The only cloud on our ...h-thingy is how Eric has gotten so FAT while I was away. Even with a mouth full of dog teeth, he's not all he could be. Like most married men, he will let himself go completely, if I'd let him. Problem? or OPPORTUNITY! I found an old wheel chair this weekend at an Estate Sale up the road from me. I had Eric push me and a gallon of Dentini, some snacks and my dog everywhere. In town we went around store after store of things so hideously expensive and breakable that the sales people literally chased us down isles and into nooks, asking frantically if they could help. He pushed me around various parks, and finally just up the highway until I said STOP! I am out of DRINK!

At last we sat outside a cafe in the Northend, I made a sign out of cardboard that said 'My Husband is FAT and I can't cook. Please help.' I got $46 and a coupon for $1.00 Subway. I gave the coupon to Eric. Fat people love Subway. My dog and I shared a pizza, extra cheese and jalepenos, and I enjoyed a pitcher of beer. When it was almost too dark to see Eric's pain, he pushed me home.

Eric was very tired at the end of this weekend, and I think he lost a few pounds. Sadness came late last evening when the police came for the wheel chair. Turns out there wasn't an Estate Sale. It was just an old person trying to get out of his handicapped van. He was confused when I pressed $20 in his hand and took the chair. I swear he acted thankful to get that much for the ancient thing. The oily old geez got his chair back and I'm out my cash. It was worth it, though, and I'm still up $26!

masterofNone 03-24-2004 07:23 PM

does this sound like zenbabe in a few years to anyone but me?

zenbabe 03-24-2004 09:33 PM

ha!

:D

ok, that made me laugh today!

Avalon 03-24-2004 09:35 PM

At a Senior Citizen's luncheon, an elderly gentleman and an
elderly lady struck up a conversation and discovered that
they both loved to fish.
Since both of them were widowed, they decided to go fishing
together the next day. The gentleman picked the lady up, and
they headed to the river to his fishing boat and started out on
their adventure.

They were riding down the river when there was a fork in the
river, and the gentleman asked the lady, "Do you want to go
up or down?" All of a sudden the lady stripped off her shirt
there in the boat!

When they finished, the man couldn't believe what had just
happened, but he had just experienced the best sex that he'd
had in years.
They fished for a while and continued on down the river, when
soon they came upon another fork in the river. He again asked
her clothes, and made wild passionate love to him again.

Needless to say, this really impressed the elderly gentleman.
So, of course, he asked her to go fishing again the next day.

She said yes, and there they were the next day, riding in the
boat when they came upon the fork in the river, and the elderly
gentleman asked, "Up or down?"


A little puzzled and disappointed, the gentleman guided the
boat down the river when he came upon another fork in the
river and he asked the lady, "Up or down?"
She replied "Up."

This really confused the gentleman, so he asked, "What's the
deal? Yesterday, every time I asked you if you wanted to go
up or down, you made mad passionate love to me. Now, today?
Nothing!"

She replied, "Well yesterday I wasn't wearing my hearing aid
and I thought the choices were 'fvck' or 'drown'!"

Old story..but it made me laugh again today

zenbabe 03-24-2004 09:41 PM

this is making me giggle right now

:)

Deviate 03-24-2004 09:44 PM

nothing. nothing made me laugh today.

Avalon 03-24-2004 09:52 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Deviate
nothing. nothing made me laugh today.
Am I wrong to assume that work today was something less than fun?:(

Avalon 03-24-2004 10:07 PM

www.cse.unsw.edu.au/~geoffo/humour/flattery.html

For Deev

Deviate 03-25-2004 12:57 AM

ha!

okay Avalon, you win.

Audreyvgs 03-25-2004 01:02 AM

As we had the whole restaurant smoking section outside tonight to ourselves, Bink went with us and eventually, after dinner had to go to the bathroom. He and I were walking back to the table, with my sis and her new BF and Nico there, and I coached him a little, as he was being silly, walking with his heels together, knees bowed out and leaning back, I whispered to him what to say (bad ma) , and as he weebled up to the table, he said to them, Look! I went to the bathroom and now I'm light in the ass!

He's like my own little ventriloquists dummy

Manana is his birthday, wish me luck!

RuneT 03-25-2004 11:39 AM

Hahaha, please don't clone him!

Audreyvgs 03-25-2004 02:37 PM

I made sure he didn't say "Light in the loafers!"

Willow Sylph 03-25-2004 03:35 PM

A co-worker and I were reminiscing about really bad past sexual experiences...

sparticle 03-25-2004 11:32 PM

This, in an email from a friend:


When cryptography is outlawed, bayl bhgynjf jvyy unir cevinpl.

Aphrodite 03-25-2004 11:45 PM

got it. That was good sparticle. Welcome aboard.

sparticle 03-26-2004 01:07 AM

Thanks kindly. Nice to meet you! :-)

Audreyvgs 03-26-2004 01:43 AM

I don't believe that Cleveland has been represented here in such a clever way, nice to meetcha!

sparticle 03-26-2004 02:10 AM

I figured that perhaps the fact that I am from Cleveland would give other folks their posts for this thread. ;) It certainly makes me laugh. Every day. :)

Very nice to meet you!

rapscalious rob 03-28-2004 07:49 PM

When I walked into my office today, there was a message on the answering machine. Here is what it said, in the voice of a kid who didnít sound much older than 12 years or so:

ďHey, wassup, dog? Itís Puff Daddy, foo. Give me a call back at 735-64110. Itís Puff Daddy, foo.Ē

Then you could hear his friends giggling in the background before he hung up.

Frieda 03-28-2004 08:01 PM

did you call back? :D

rapscalious rob 03-28-2004 08:31 PM

No - it wasnít even a valid phone number! :D

sparticle 03-28-2004 09:23 PM

Rapscalious Rob in the Thread Killers' Thread. " BLAH BLAH " indeed! :D

Hermione 03-28-2004 10:12 PM

"he is hot.. and rich.. I should become impregnated with his child so he would be forced to marry me..." - My friend

zenbabe 03-28-2004 11:00 PM

Nothing really made me laugh today....except the AngelofGOD thread.........

that's pretty bad............

fodder 03-29-2004 01:43 AM

that angelofgod thread

and the part on arrested development when the magician brother was telling his nephew to "just go" and muttering "i'm sorry, son" and the nephew was like, what

and i just got my cats this three tier cat tree thing that's floor to ceiling. i started pretend-scratching on it so they would copy me and they did and it was so cute i almost threw 'em across the room

masterofNone 03-29-2004 01:53 AM

i think one day fodder is going to grow up to be rimmer.


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