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-   -   Post something that made you laugh today. (http://www.zefrank.com/bulletin_new/showthread.php?t=4329)

Avalon 06-26-2004 01:01 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by madasacutsnake

SMARTYPANTS..ARE YOU SEEING THIS????:p
Thank you Snake..my cats do this to me all the time.

Smartypants 06-26-2004 01:08 AM

I did indeed see that, Av. I immediately checked to see who posted it and was SHOCKED! SHOCKED! to see that it wasn't you.

Have you and Snake discussed breeding? Snake could sell them on eBay! What shall you call the new breed? How about the Domestic Cascade Shorthair?... or... Felinus Kitchenaidicus?... or a Lady Kenmore Tabby?

Excuse me now while I go and check what that thumping noise is that's coming from the kitchen...

madasacutsnake 06-26-2004 01:20 AM

Quote:

Snake could sell them on eBay!
Yeah. And if you can't read terms, I will send you one that craps in there too.

Smartypants 06-26-2004 01:26 AM

And there it is.

Problem solved.

Feel better?

madasacutsnake 06-26-2004 01:34 AM

Quote:

Feel better?
Nope. NOW I feel better:


----- Original Message -----

Question from eBay Member:

Dear ,

Hi, I think you should change your title. I have one of these bells at home. They are a matt finnish and has a print on the inside of the dress and in NO WAY STATES that it is Holly Hobbie! If you sell this under the impression of being Holly Hobbie, YOU WILL get a negative from the unsuspecting buyer and unhappy buyer!

Thank you,


----- Original Message -----


Dear Way Too Much Time on Your Hands,

Thanks for your concern. Can I Paypal you 20 cents to buy a life?

Liz

----- Original Message -----

Its up to you if you want to rip people off....but then again I am not an asshole


----- Original Message -----



Dear Ignorant Very Nasty Foul Mouthed Person with Way Too Much Time on Your Hands,

a) I have been selling on ebay since 1997

b) I was a founding member of both ebay US and ebay Australia. I used to count Pierre (look it up babes) as a mate. I was involved in promoting ebay Australia when it first was formed.

c) my feedback = 1190 vs your feedback 203. We'll let this one speak for itself

Ergo, I obviously have a far deeper understanding of what constitutes internet and trade fraud than you do.

d) the description is very clear. Most people without a borderline IQ will read the and understand the description as well as the title. Now, prepare yourself dear, I have been selling spinels and cut glass using "diamond" in the title for seven years now - without a complaint or problem with buyers comprehending the auction terms. And I never been called a rude word for doing it either.

e) you have been added to my blocked bidder list. Oh yes, I know, you would never have bought something from such a blatantly dishonest person as me (99.3% positive fb rating and 7 year selling history on ebay notwithstanding) but I happen to know that people like you tend to have brains like swiss cheese. A year or so later, you will attempt to bid on an item then send me a whiney email asking why you are blocked. You see, people like you find it fun to attack other users then wander off back into your very average little daze filled lives and forget all about it. I know your type well."I am not an *hole"? Your nose just grew.

Feel free to respond with another profanity. I realise that you must find it difficult to speak or write without including same. However, I have spelled my response out pretty clearly above (perhaps you could get your TAFE lecturer to explain the big words) and unlike you, don't have much time to waste so I have been compelled to add you to my blocked senders list too.


Liz

Clytie 06-26-2004 02:49 AM

*gnaws on a teething ring*

tooo funny! ebay sux...

madasacutsnake 06-26-2004 06:44 AM

Should be named:

Pensioner Builds Plane in Garage. Can't Get it out the Door.



Pensioner builds plane in garage

From correspondents in Bratislava
June 25, 2004

A SLOVAK pensioner has spent three years building his own plane in his garage, using only a model plane as guide, local agencies reported today.

Milan Friso, 67, is now planning to take his friends on holiday in Croatia, the Czech news wire CTK said.

"Owning my own plane has been my lifelong dream so I decided to build it in my garage, copying a model of the US Fox plane," said Mr Friso, a former pilot instructor from Nitra in western Slovakia.

Friso said it cost him about 750,000 koruna ($32,000) to build the ultralight aircraft, which weighs 280km.

He said he expected the flight to Croatia to take about three hours at a speed of 145km per hour.



Pensioner builds plane in garage Pensioner builds plane in garage

Clytie 07-05-2004 01:07 PM


Avalon 07-05-2004 09:23 PM


nycwriters 07-05-2004 11:32 PM



This kitty was raised by pigs, so no she's not eating them, but playing with them. She thinks she's a pig. :)

priceyfatprude 07-05-2004 11:33 PM

Awwwwwww!

nycwriters 07-05-2004 11:37 PM

click

masterofNone 07-05-2004 11:44 PM


sparticle 07-09-2004 02:11 AM

We have been trying to keep the cats, particularly big old Gus, out of the bedrooms at night. Gussy's favorite thing to do by day is take "dust baths" in the driveway dirt.

Tonight I went up to give Mr. Sparticle a hug and a kiss goodnight (I'm a night owl and he's not) and, when I said "Goodnight!", Gus stuck his head out from his hiding place under a blanket on the chair.

Busted! haha

He looked like Roy Batty sticking his head through the wall in "Blade Runner". LOL
"Time....to get thrown out of the bedroom. *weary sigh*"

Audreyvgs 07-09-2004 02:34 AM

I found Pike the Cat, face down in a pile of my CLEAN LAUNDRY FOLDED NEATLY ON MY BED. Face down!!! MY BLACK COTTON SHORTS!!!! It never did wake up, til we shook the bed. Can a white cat with black tail and nose be deaf? I swear to god this thing never spooks till the dogs run over her.

rmr 07-09-2004 02:38 AM

it's sad because I laughed a lot today......i just can't remember why.

that's funny right?

topcat 07-09-2004 02:57 AM

i work in a train station. every other thursday a 92 year old doctor, who still is in practice comes in. he gets his ticket from me and then asks if he can do anything for me,he
then sits down. i usually leave my office and go sit with him for a few minutes. so i go sit with him and i say you can do something for me and i pat my stomach and say i do i lose this. he says loudly stop eating so fvcking much.

rmr 07-09-2004 03:20 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by topcat
i work in a train station. every other thursday a 92 year old doctor, who still is in practice comes in. he gets his ticket from me and then asks if he can do anything for me,he
then sits down. i usually leave my office and go sit with him for a few minutes. so i go sit with him and i say you can do something for me and i pat my stomach and say i do i lose this. he says loudly stop eating so fvcking much.

your post

AllegroNg 07-11-2004 01:26 AM

"oooooh! Little zhoozhoobooboocuteyfoofoo!!"


By the loverly WS

rmr 07-11-2004 01:30 AM

YOU MY BOY BLUE!!

Frieda 07-11-2004 07:49 PM

a sign on a store window:


"dear bikers and burglars,

please do not place bicycles or bricks onto our "unbreakable" store window.

thank you,

the management"

sparticle 07-11-2004 08:34 PM

Today at the hardware store, there was a huge, LOUD lady wearing pink plastic curlers under a bright print scarf, and she was bossing around a little tiny meek husband who looked afraid she might bite him.

It isn't nice to laugh; for all I know she's a nicer person than I'll ever be, but OMG! PINK plastic curlers, and I mean these were

pink!


priceyfatprude 07-11-2004 10:20 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by sparticle
Today at the hardware store, there was a huge, LOUD lady wearing pink plastic curlers under a bright print scarf, and she was bossing around a little tiny meek husband who looked afraid she might bite him.
I think I just found my Halloween costume for this year.

Pink curlers, ugly ass scarf, big pillow in the back of my pants, maybe even a face mask?

trisherina 07-12-2004 04:17 AM

Rat family went to Spiderman 2 tonight. Otto Octavia gives Peter Parker advice: "If you want to make a woman fall in love with you, feed her poetry." Rat Man leans in close and whispers in my ear:
"There once was a man from Nantucket..."

nycwriters 07-12-2004 12:04 PM

It has to be photoshopped but ...


Clytie 07-12-2004 02:37 PM

a patient insisted that he ordered chocolate pudding and never got it-- only you know he did because you delivered it. everytime he denies recieving it...come to find out...hes skitzo. and the only thing his personalities have in common is chocolate pudding!

Coffee 07-12-2004 04:51 PM

I got an unsolicited fax from a company offering home loan or credit refinancing...it is against the law to send unsolicited faxes. I grit my teath and hope they go away.
I get a second fax from the company 2 days later (today)...this time they called at 6 AM (it is also illegal to telemarket before 8 am reciepients time...although oddly enough their fax lists the call time as 2 days earlier at 1:29 pm...they have their machine set to cover there ass on that score apparently). This time I call the number and get ahold of the "I'm just a dumb receptionist, I can't help you (...also illegal) who forwards me to the "compliance department". The dude there tells me.. "sir, the telemarketing laws don't go into effect till 2005" I argue with him for about 10 seconds, then go online to get "chapter and verse" to quote to him...when I call back an answering machine says that their office is closed. Farkers...but it made me laugh.

So I'm poor enough that I'm thinking of taking them to small claims court for 500 dollars per fax for being such asswipes...that would really make me laugh.

sparticle 07-12-2004 07:01 PM

Do it! Do it!

sparticle 07-12-2004 07:01 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by trisherina
Rat family went to Spiderman 2 tonight. Otto Octavia gives Peter Parker advice: "If you want to make a woman fall in love with you, feed her poetry." Rat Man leans in close and whispers in my ear:
"There once was a man from Nantucket..."

OMG! LOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!!

sparticle 07-12-2004 07:05 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by priceyfatprude
I think I just found my Halloween costume for this year.

Pink curlers, ugly ass scarf, big pillow in the back of my pants, maybe even a face mask?

Don't forget the white ankle socks with big black shoes that look like they were overstock from a Russian department store ca. 1973. Do not shave your legs for at least a month prior to the big night. And you need a floral print cotton housedress with enameled metal snaps. Add a pair of catseye glasses in blue pearl frames with rhinestones and you are the SHIZZLE!

Aphrodite 07-12-2004 07:13 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by sparticle
Don't forget the white ankle socks with big black shoes that look like they were overstock from a Russian department store ca. 1973. Do not shave your legs for at least a month prior to the big night. And you need a floral print cotton housedress with enameled metal snaps. Add a pair of catseye glasses in blue pearl frames with rhinestones and you are the SHIZZLE!
Hey, That's my goin' intu town good close. Yu can't wear that! Then whut'll I wear? Huh?

sparticle 07-12-2004 07:21 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Aphrodite
Hey, That's my goin' intu town good close. Yu can't wear that! Then whut'll I wear? Huh?
You could borrow my gotchies, but I'm washin' em! Once a year oughta be enough, don'tcha think? Goddamn! Who'd believe it's July again already?

lapietra 07-14-2004 09:52 PM


lapietra 07-14-2004 09:53 PM


nycwriters 07-14-2004 09:57 PM

:eek:

madasacutsnake 07-15-2004 01:29 AM

I AM THE MIGHTY SOCK SLAYER. I SHALL NOT BE MOCKED.



I was too slow getting the camera so this you are just going to have to take my word for:



chocodile 07-15-2004 04:07 AM

Someone I know is enamored, dare I say, twitterpated?

chocodile 07-15-2004 04:13 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by lapietra

Don't take this the wrong way, but you've got the biggest ***** I've ever seen.

Magpie 07-15-2004 04:53 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by lapietra

OMG Look at his TOES! They are hysterical! :D

Audreyvgs 07-15-2004 05:02 AM

I got mad when I found Pike sleeping face down in my clean laundry basket on my black clothes, this one would probably leave a half pound of hair!


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