How I Burned my Dink By JesusTitties
 

One morning, i woke up on my day off - and because i had my own flat, i had the privacy to walk around, sleep and do anything i want in the nude. As i normally did.

What was there to have for breakfast? I wondered.. and yes, i secretly pumped my fist as i noticed a fresh pound of bacon in my fridge.

Grabbing the bacon, i tossed onto the pan and lit up the burner to my stove excited at the concept ill be having bacon this morning.

Now, for those of you who are unaware of the male systematic code - normally (at least those of us under 35) we wake up with a boner. At least i do. If that makes me a freak then JesusTitties is a freak.

So, as i was cooking bacon at full mast - i reached over the stove to grab some salt to throw in the pan.

Because I am a large guy, the stove was precisely at mid waist level, and as i reached the tip of my dink pressed against the hot coil on my stove, which had been burning for a good 3 minutes at the time.

As i jumped back, i could immediately smell the burnt flesh in the air. I ran to the washroom and stuck my dink in the sink, with one leg up on the toilet, the other straddeled over the sink, flushing it with water.

It was too late.
It was bleeding, and i could still smell the burnt flesh in the apartment. I decided to put a cream on it and go to the hospital, where i was treated with 3rd degree burns.

For 2 weeks i could not wear boxers, anything confining and basically had to take a leave of work. As well, report to my seniority with regard to my injury.

By the time i return to work - everyone knew and my desk was cluttered with pictures and hype regarding my burnt dink.

The moral of the story?
Burning your weener hurts more than anything you could ever imagine.

I'm laughing but I feel really sorry for it. By it I mean your dink.

ouch

hahahahahahahaha


hahahahahahahaha

hahahahahahahahah

hahahahahahahahaha


where is agent smith??? hahahahahahahaha?

I want her to post "that" picture right now

hahahahahahahaha

I am sorry to hear about your dink, JT, but that *was* a good story.

Thank you to Zen for the suggestion.

Is the dink ok now?

Yeah! Are there battle wounds? Please say yes.

There is no scar to the naked eye - no pun intended.

However under the correct lighting, you can definately see the redness of where it once was.

what sort of lighting would that be?

bright. sometimes flourecent.

jesusdink

I love that story :D

hehe :D it's a good story, absolutely!

im here, as always.

that one?are you sure?

here ya go, rimmie.

i miss JT and his controversial wit! :p

please come back JT..............

( i was on the balcony )

yes it was fun! ( let's do it again tomorrow )

but i'm so shy.........

where did i put those binoculars??

if you think i'm a perverted old lady who stalks the neighbours with binoculars and cackles while sitting at the window ( with her binoculars in her lap ), you're dead wrong! i'm a real classy lady! innocent even. demure. graceful. yes.

i knew you'd understand me!

:D

Re: How I Burned my Dink By JesusTitties
 

Does anyone else think this is a great name for a rock band or a new sitcom?

why do all of my posts turn into a big orgy session between moel and malina.
for christ sakes get a room

everyone else would be proud of it..

is moel a hottie?

yup, definitely

ooh, we want details on moel hottieness!

do a search on "mug shot", there's a thread somewhere that has pics of us all!

moel's "hottieness" is kind of between his ears.... ;)

what're you talking about? he's a total piece of ass!

lol angie you're always so subtle :D

they are not exclusive.. ( yes, moel is both! ) ;)

Malina, I am appalled. APPALLED!!! Shocked, even.

Moel's adorable, it's doesn't have to be your thread he is flirted w/in, JT. You're not special in that way. For cooking bacon nude, yes. For moel getting his flirt on, no.

hahahahahahahaha!

( i love you, prude! )

HAHA! :D

between his thighs, you say?

i think you are a homo, if that makes you feel any better.