At a Senior Citizen's luncheon, an elderly gentleman and an
elderly lady struck up a conversation and discovered that
they both loved to fish.
Since both of them were widowed, they decided to go fishing
together the next day. The gentleman picked the lady up, and
they headed to the river to his fishing boat and started out on
They were riding down the river when there was a fork in the
river, and the gentleman asked the lady, "Do you want to go
up or down?" All of a sudden the lady stripped off her shirt
there in the boat!
When they finished, the man couldn't believe what had just
happened, but he had just experienced the best sex that he'd
had in years.
They fished for a while and continued on down the river, when
soon they came upon another fork in the river. He again asked
her clothes, and made wild passionate love to him again.
Needless to say, this really impressed the elderly gentleman.
So, of course, he asked her to go fishing again the next day.
She said yes, and there they were the next day, riding in the
boat when they came upon the fork in the river, and the elderly
gentleman asked, "Up or down?"
A little puzzled and disappointed, the gentleman guided the
boat down the river when he came upon another fork in the
river and he asked the lady, "Up or down?"
She replied "Up."
This really confused the gentleman, so he asked, "What's the
deal? Yesterday, every time I asked you if you wanted to go
up or down, you made mad passionate love to me. Now, today?
She replied, "Well yesterday I wasn't wearing my hearing aid
and I thought the choices were 'fvck' or 'drown'!"
Old story..but it made me laugh again today
I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.