Some Ze Monkey advice

[Avalon]

klynne,
have you ever voiced disappointment or anger over something your boyfriend has done, to your mom? We tend to forgive and forget things our loved ones have done, but friends and families have long memorys.

[daverbee]

She's being a mother. Plain and simple.
It took a year before my mother would even stay in the same room with Vickie. Needless to say things got very uncomfortable whenever we went anywhere together, but I just kept putting the two of them together until Momrbee realized that Vickie was the woman I loved and that her hostility would drive me away from her if she wasn't careful.
It's gonna happen no matter when or where they first meet, so you'll have to choose the right moment. Christmas or another occasion won't matter, just keep in mind that if they are gonna get along they will, and if they aren't, they won't.
I agree with surbhi that you should give him fair warning on how difficult she may be.

[zenbabe]

Just tell her that instead of having an uncomfortable christmas, you decided to go to his families house this year instead. They don't seem to have a stick up their ass.

She will change her mind.

[priceyfatprude]

This is the sensitive one, right? The one you've been seeing awhile now & there was some dysfunctional family crap in his past (I think I've just described everyone on the planet, scratch that)? Dinner w/your parents will seem like a piece of cake to him.

Just make sure to warn him about your mother, that it's nothing he should take personally.

Good luck & how'd your dad's play go?

[sparticle]

Originally posted by priceyfatprude
& there was some dysfunctional family crap in his past (I think I've just described everyone on the planet, scratch that)?

[Klynne]

You guys are the best! Thank you for your advice. I have never said anything bad about him to my parents. He really does want to meet my mom, and he seems to think that he can charm her socks off. I do not think that is possible.

I have taken home boyfriends to meet my parents before, and my dad has been very friendly, while my mom is stand offish.

My older brother and I talked about this, and he told me to just join them on Christmas Eve, and leave the next morning. And if mom gives me shvt for leaving early the next day tell her the truth. Which is, his family really wants to meet me, and that I have agreed to meet his family. He said mom will have great guilt over that, but, that should not be the point.

[Klynne]

Originally posted by sparticle
Amen.

Thanks, she has always managed to make me feel horrible. Don't mean to be a downer, but she has always had that talent.

[Klynne]

Originally posted by sparticle
I went so numb on Christmas day
I couldn't feel my hands or feet
I shouldn't have come
She made me pay
For gleaming with Donald down her street
She put blame on him
And shame on me
She made it all seem so tawdry and cheap
Oh, let's be nice, Mama, open up your gifts
You know, happiness is the best facelift
I mean, after all, she introduced us
Oh, but she regrets that now
Shacked up downtown
Making love without a license
Same old sacred cow
She said, Did you come home to disgrace us?
I said, Why is this joy not allowed?
For God's sake, I'm middle-aged, Mama
And time moves swift
And you know happiness is the best facelift
Oh, love takes so much courage
Love takes so much shit
He said You've seen too many movies, Joni
She said Snap out of it!
Oh, the cold winds blew at our room with a view
All helpful and hopeful and candlelit
We kissed the angels and the moon eclipsed
You know, Happiness is the best facelift
We pushed the bed up to the window
To see the Christmas lights
On the east bank across the steaming river
Between the bridges lit up Paris-like
This river has run through both our lives
Between these banks of our continuing delights
Bless us, don't let us lose the drift
You know, Happiness is the best facelift.

-- Joni Mitchell

XOXOXOX. That gave me the tingles. Thanks, Klynne

[sparticle]

Originally posted by Klynne
XOXOXOX. That gave me the tingles. Thanks, Klynne

*hug* I hope it all works out well, hon.