prose poetry intoxication

[dddrum]

Coffee, you poor, myopic Philistine. Do you not see? This man is a visionary! He is a subversive wordgod, who has lain bare the bleak matrix of the doomed universe. Well, maybe not the actual bleak matrix, but dollars to doughnuts, he has lain bare somewhere, I guarandamntee ya.

I mean, O ye sick caffeinated freak, that in my hummable estimation, Mister Wolf Larson is the love child of James Joyce and Lawrence Ferlinghetti, if Ferlinghetti were a fertile-wombed woman named Joyce James, whose pendulous breasts became cabinets, and her teeth became paintings, and the cemetery city became an endlessly morphing Sally Cruikshank cartoon, only without any of the humor.

I tell you some kinda what, Senor Mountain-Grown Beverage, you dismiss this man at your peril. I have seen the fu!ture, and! it!'s pep!pered! with ex!clamat!on mark$!!!!!!!!!!! ? I have been to the website, and it is absoloot!ly ass-packed with delirious free verse, every example of which seems to include tall buildings bending over sidewalks littered with corpses. Larson's battle cry is clear: BETTER SANITATION! FIRMER BUILDINGS! (Oh yeah, and apparently, MANKIND, KISS YOUR ASS GOODBYE! ...but I don't wanna read too much into it. Poetry is subjective, after all.)

The website also offers works written for the stage and screen, offered up with the same hysterical tone that we Larsonites have come to crave, and having craven, crave more of. Which. Then, like a big glob of luscious butter cream icing on top of the bratwurst, there are the novels. Novels they may be, but these slabs of raw fiction have been carved from the author's rich and colorful life experience, and are virtually reeking with elan. Make that literally. No, I mean it... they reek. You will rub your eyes in disbelief at the rugged account of life on an Alaskan fishing trawler, in which he describes one of his co-workers as, "the most cuddly looking sweet sounding guy in the Bering Sea." I crap you not. Check out Larson's travel book, Travel Around The World? Why Not?! Goggle gormlessly at such commentary as, "That's a great idea! Today I'll go to China!" and, " 'Having money is cool,' I thought. 'Yippeeeeee!' " Just wait. Visit the website, and I promise that you too, will become a rabid Larsonion.

Get on board, ZeBoarders! CRY WOLF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Edging for the door,
DDD