This is where we post our tips for travellers - Page 2 - ZEFRANK.COM

noxxville · 06-27-2006, 02:01 PM

While it may seem like a harmless act to pick fruit from a tree hanging out of someone's back yard, there are some conditions that must be checked for before this action is carried out:

1. Verify that you are not in Hurricane, UT
2. Verify that the owner of the property is not standing on the lawn 20 feet away.
3. Most importantly, verify that said owner is not a 40-something ish man standing on his lawn in his boxer shorts, cleaning a double-barrelled shotgun, with a shaved poodle sitting next to him.

I tell you this from experience.

daverbee · 06-27-2006, 02:58 PM

^^^
Depends on how the poodle is shaved, doesn't it?

lapietra · 06-27-2006, 05:06 PM

If you're traveling to San Francisco and find yourself in Chinatown, avoid eating in any of the restaurants that have people in red Mandarin jackets waving you in with a coupon for free dim sum and 20% off. These restaurants are most likely losing their leases and will do things like deliberately confusing you in an attempt to make you lose track of what you actually ordered, and then bring you a bill the total of which is roughly over twice what you actually owe. (This is for a couple; results may vary based on the number in your party.) The ensuing heated argument with various of the sometimes insulting restaurant administrative staff will do nothing for your digestion, to say nothing of the bizarre music that sounds like piped-in karaoke and the funny little touches like a tiny paper American flag on a toothpick stuck in a plate of apple slices and the fear that you won't get out of the second-story dining room alive. Head over to Japantown (cross-streets: Webster and Post) and get yourself an excellent stomachfull of fresh and delicious sushi for what you'd end up paying for some dimsum, a plate of rice, soup, tea, and a couple entrees. (Sounds like $25? Think again.

Try $73 argued down to $48, acid reflux and a whopping headache.) *ESPECIALLY* avoid Chinatown Restaurant. (Yeah - it's a no-brainer unless you've been walking around Fisherman's Wharf all day and you're low blood sugar anyway and end up walking UP and DOWN all those hills... yeesh.)

Frieda · 07-01-2006, 04:52 AM

don't wear a strapless bra while travelling in a tram or bus or taxi in Lisbon. try wearing a sports bra or something.

06-27-2006, 02:01 PM	#16
noxxville Disco Maven Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: NC...seriously....how did that happen? Posts: 2,024	While it may seem like a harmless act to pick fruit from a tree hanging out of someone's back yard, there are some conditions that must be checked for before this action is carried out: 1. Verify that you are not in Hurricane, UT 2. Verify that the owner of the property is not standing on the lawn 20 feet away. 3. Most importantly, verify that said owner is not a 40-something ish man standing on his lawn in his boxer shorts, cleaning a double-barrelled shotgun, with a shaved poodle sitting next to him. I tell you this from experience. __________________ Call that guy butter because he's on a roll!

06-27-2006, 02:58 PM	#17
daverbee Key Lime Pie rocks!!! Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Oh, yeah! Posts: 7,695	^^^ Depends on how the poodle is shaved, doesn't it? __________________ Time is essential because without it everything would happen all at once.

06-27-2006, 05:06 PM	#18
lapietra half baked Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: just ducky Posts: 12,078	seriously If you're traveling to San Francisco and find yourself in Chinatown, avoid eating in any of the restaurants that have people in red Mandarin jackets waving you in with a coupon for free dim sum and 20% off. These restaurants are most likely losing their leases and will do things like deliberately confusing you in an attempt to make you lose track of what you actually ordered, and then bring you a bill the total of which is roughly over twice what you actually owe. (This is for a couple; results may vary based on the number in your party.) The ensuing heated argument with various of the sometimes insulting restaurant administrative staff will do nothing for your digestion, to say nothing of the bizarre music that sounds like piped-in karaoke and the funny little touches like a tiny paper American flag on a toothpick stuck in a plate of apple slices and the fear that you won't get out of the second-story dining room alive. Head over to Japantown (cross-streets: Webster and Post) and get yourself an excellent stomachfull of fresh and delicious sushi for what you'd end up paying for some dimsum, a plate of rice, soup, tea, and a couple entrees. (Sounds like $25? Think again. Try $73 argued down to $48, acid reflux and a whopping headache.) ESPECIALLY avoid Chinatown Restaurant. (Yeah - it's a no-brainer unless you've been walking around Fisherman's Wharf all day and you're low blood sugar anyway and end up walking UP and DOWN all those hills... yeesh.) __________________ “As long as the world is turning and spinning, we're gonna be dizzy and we're gonna make mistakes.” ~ Mel Brooks Last edited by lapietra : 06-27-2006 at 05:10 PM.

07-01-2006, 04:52 AM	#19
Frieda in limbo Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 19,503	don't wear a strapless bra while travelling in a tram or bus or taxi in Lisbon. try wearing a sports bra or something. __________________ zoek waar je wil, maar het zit in jezelf oh yeah

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