Tell Me What You Think Of My Poem... - Page 2 - ZEFRANK.COM

Master_Jedi · 07-03-2006, 05:29 PM

i write poems constantly, im not necessarily venting, and i couldnt remember if it was rigor or w.e, i juss wanted an opinion on if my poetry is ne good.

trisherina · 07-03-2006, 05:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Master_Jedi

i write poems constantly, im not necessarily venting, and i couldnt remember if it was rigor or w.e, i juss wanted an opinion on if my poetry is ne good.

Well, some people can't give their opinion on a piece of writing without also line editing. I belonged to a fiction writing club called The Cult of Pain for years, and I'll never forget the poor fellow who presented a short story and endured about a half hour of line editing from a couple of people before finally bleating: "But I just wanted to know if it was any GOOD!" As for "not necessarily venting," well, you might want to take a peek at your signature to see how someone would get that impression.

Marcus Bales · 07-03-2006, 11:29 PM

Speaking in the broadest terms, there are two categories of attempts at art: the producer is trying to communicate to or evoke something in the audience; and the producer is trying to express something. These are the abstract poles; no piece is ever purely one thing or another, but the approach of the attempt at art is both significant and important in the attempts to see whether the piece is art or not.

As a rule, the implicit contract between the producer and the audience in the field of art is that the producer has a license to lie to the audience so long as those lies are in the service of something resembling a larger truth -- or, in short, don't let the facts stand in the way of a good story.

Generally speaking, then, most art lies closer to the "trying to communicate or to evoke something in the audience" end of the spectrum because within any piece of art the artist has very little time and space within which to convince the audience that his or her own expression of his or her own something-to-express is worth spending any of the audience's time or effort on. So even if the artist wants to blurt his or her own expression, he or she had better find a way to make it interesting TO THE AUDIENCE or there won't be one -- or not much of one.

Now, there is an entire philosophy of art based on the notion that there need be no audience, that the artist's effusions out into the indifferent void are significant and important in and of themselves because they are the artist's effusions. The avant garde is full of people like that, and as a rule it's a lot easier to find them and be accepted as an Artist in the avant garde than anywhere else because none of them give a rat's ass about your piddly effusions so long as you're willing to let them effuse in front of you before they sit back to wait for you to finish effusing so that they can begin again. Also as a rule it's a lot easier to "create" a piece of "art" in the avant garde than anywhere else, too, because the avant garde prides itself on flouting any and all rules, so the mere claim that you're an artist is good enough for them if you'll reciprocate and regard them as an artist on the basis of their own mere claims. That is to say, so long as you don't judge them, they won't judge you, and you can all express yourselves in front of, but not to, one another.

The difference between the Blurt folks and the Art folks is illustrated, I think, in the difference between a singer who cries during a touching song and can barely get the thing out, and a singer who makes the audience cry during a touching song, but doesn't cry him- or herself. Which one is the art of singing? I hold that it's the singer who doesn't cry but makes the audience cry. The singer who weeps onstage is merely blurting his or her own feelings, irrespective of whether the audience is touched at all.

So, what you've got to ask yourself, when you start to make your piece of art, is: what are you trying to do?

topcat · 07-03-2006, 11:33 PM

^^^^ i think he said it sucked

its only a joke.

Hyakujo's Fox · 07-03-2006, 11:52 PM

It seems there's a dark inversion/parallel of the Romeo and Juliet story in there. Even though the poem says we moved from 'Tragedy' to 'Happiness', at the end, it doesn't feel as if we have.

07-03-2006, 05:29 PM	#16
Master_Jedi Shaggy Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: the burg of florida Posts: 501	i write poems constantly, im not necessarily venting, and i couldnt remember if it was rigor or w.e, i juss wanted an opinion on if my poetry is ne good. __________________ Varsity Football Player, It's hard work, but it's worth it on Friday Nights. Can't wait till next season. =D

07-03-2006, 11:29 PM	#18
Marcus Bales ________________ Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: In a coign of the cliff between lowland and highland, at the sea-down's edge between windward and lee, walled round with rocks as an inland island, the ghost of a garden fronts the sea. Posts: 8,967	Speaking in the broadest terms, there are two categories of attempts at art: the producer is trying to communicate to or evoke something in the audience; and the producer is trying to express something. These are the abstract poles; no piece is ever purely one thing or another, but the approach of the attempt at art is both significant and important in the attempts to see whether the piece is art or not. As a rule, the implicit contract between the producer and the audience in the field of art is that the producer has a license to lie to the audience so long as those lies are in the service of something resembling a larger truth -- or, in short, don't let the facts stand in the way of a good story. Generally speaking, then, most art lies closer to the "trying to communicate or to evoke something in the audience" end of the spectrum because within any piece of art the artist has very little time and space within which to convince the audience that his or her own expression of his or her own something-to-express is worth spending any of the audience's time or effort on. So even if the artist wants to blurt his or her own expression, he or she had better find a way to make it interesting TO THE AUDIENCE or there won't be one -- or not much of one. Now, there is an entire philosophy of art based on the notion that there need be no audience, that the artist's effusions out into the indifferent void are significant and important in and of themselves because they are the artist's effusions. The avant garde is full of people like that, and as a rule it's a lot easier to find them and be accepted as an Artist in the avant garde than anywhere else because none of them give a rat's ass about your piddly effusions so long as you're willing to let them effuse in front of you before they sit back to wait for you to finish effusing so that they can begin again. Also as a rule it's a lot easier to "create" a piece of "art" in the avant garde than anywhere else, too, because the avant garde prides itself on flouting any and all rules, so the mere claim that you're an artist is good enough for them if you'll reciprocate and regard them as an artist on the basis of their own mere claims. That is to say, so long as you don't judge them, they won't judge you, and you can all express yourselves in front of, but not to, one another. The difference between the Blurt folks and the Art folks is illustrated, I think, in the difference between a singer who cries during a touching song and can barely get the thing out, and a singer who makes the audience cry during a touching song, but doesn't cry him- or herself. Which one is the art of singing? I hold that it's the singer who doesn't cry but makes the audience cry. The singer who weeps onstage is merely blurting his or her own feelings, irrespective of whether the audience is touched at all. So, what you've got to ask yourself, when you start to make your piece of art, is: what are you trying to do? __________________ My strength is as the strength of eight -- My heart is nearly pure.

07-03-2006, 11:33 PM	#19
topcat monkey Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: across the st. from the telephone pole Posts: 1,970	^^^^ i think he said it sucked its only a joke. __________________ the most tip top topcat This is an internet bulletin board. Nothing more. Nothing less

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07-03-2006, 11:52 PM	#20
Hyakujo's Fox left hanging Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: between the click of the light and the start of the dream Posts: 10,071	It seems there's a dark inversion/parallel of the Romeo and Juliet story in there. Even though the poem says we moved from 'Tragedy' to 'Happiness', at the end, it doesn't feel as if we have.