a haiku story !!!

[CatchrNdRy]

Morning light peeks in
And I quickly check the clock
late for work again

Got to get some gas
Before I end up walking
Through the morning rain

Still groggy, I yawn
Fumble for the coffee cup
Drips spill on my tie

"Eggs are like flowers"
A yummy, tasty daisy
...now a yellow stream

It's funny, I thought,
how things can change so quickly
just like traffic lights

One, two, three, repeat
six streams of yellow lava
make a run for it

Grabing toast to go
And an apple for good luck
twist the stem for love

My car is so old
it huffs and puffs at twenty
i know its faking

Daydreams at the lights
And loud honking at my back
Startled, I yell back

"Go suck a lemon!"
He did not look so burly
in his pin-striped suit

traffic is so weird
it's tourist season again
Margaritaville

My mood is changing
I feel like a tall cool one
but its 9 A.M.

A long day ahead
thinkin' about things she said
Its just nag, nag, nag

Happiness is a
ghost I stopped trying to find
dancing on my grave

It's just one more day
before I know I will pay
the Yakuza men

With parts of myself
Lopped off in brutal fashion
I need money now.

arriving at work
someone has parked in my space
it now sours my day.

Often at these times
i find comfort in revenge
and pee on his car

I walk in the door
giggling to myself softly
despite my wet leg

People look away
Gray cubicles are mocking
my inbox is full

I must find a way
to break away from this cage
or i just might melt

"Good morning" said Tish
smelling of cheap, bad perfume
which makes me horny

"You look fabulous."
I'm picturing her naked
"Really? Do you like?"

Showing off her shoes
Knowing that she's sweet torment
She twirls - what a flirt !

"By the way..." she says.
"Staff meeting at 3 PM."
"don't be late this time"

As she walks away
I watch her hips move like an
old lover I knew

My phone is ringing
But can anyone be home?
(to me... work is home)

"Hello, my darling"
"You are in some deep trouble!"
"I saw you with Tish."

Crap...stupid webcam
Now I'll have to jump through hoops
oh the trials of love

Its sweet salty sting
Brings back the taste of her flesh
love needs some ketchup

I said that out loud
and instantly turn beet red
knowing I've blown it.

Still, her voice softens
the dew of my summer morn
I bend to her will.

I order flowers
Should I order eggs instead?
Infertile woman...

Checking my inbox
Grow your penis, bigger breasts
both are good ideas

So where to click next?
"Yakuza sends good fortune"
Japanese are vexed