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Maggie Shamrock · 11-18-2003, 10:08 PM

November 18, 2003

I woke up this morning with one mother of a hangover. The pain was so blinding I didn't notice that Mary had departed until I was desperately searching for the bottle of Excedrin on my nightstand and noticed my wallet was missing. The missing wallet caused me to frantically search the room hoping for some sign that Mary might still be there...but alas, she was gone.

I noticed my television, stereo and microwave were also absent. Damn all women to hell! Thank God I thought enough to hide my fax under my bed...I need the mothership more than ever now...what would I have done had my only means of contact with those magnanimous beings been wrenched from my fingertips?

I have to be more careful from now on. One night of fantastic sex with a semi-toothless, homeless woman is just not worth the consequences of foiling a plan that is so important to the universe...no matter how big her breasts may be...and firm...like two ripe melons...ohhhh...there I go again...I MUST focus. I am planning a day of rest and thoughtful meditation. I have not heard from the mothership in two days. No doubt they are much disappointed with my recent performance. I will telepathically send a message begging their forgiveness and plead for another sign that they still trust in me to carry out their plan. My fax is plugged in and ready to go...wish me luck, I'll need it.

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11-18-2003, 10:08 PM	#11
Maggie Shamrock monkey Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Alternate Universe Posts: 29	November 18, 2003 I woke up this morning with one mother of a hangover. The pain was so blinding I didn't notice that Mary had departed until I was desperately searching for the bottle of Excedrin on my nightstand and noticed my wallet was missing. The missing wallet caused me to frantically search the room hoping for some sign that Mary might still be there...but alas, she was gone. I noticed my television, stereo and microwave were also absent. Damn all women to hell! Thank God I thought enough to hide my fax under my bed...I need the mothership more than ever now...what would I have done had my only means of contact with those magnanimous beings been wrenched from my fingertips? I have to be more careful from now on. One night of fantastic sex with a semi-toothless, homeless woman is just not worth the consequences of foiling a plan that is so important to the universe...no matter how big her breasts may be...and firm...like two ripe melons...ohhhh...there I go again...I MUST focus. I am planning a day of rest and thoughtful meditation. I have not heard from the mothership in two days. No doubt they are much disappointed with my recent performance. I will telepathically send a message begging their forgiveness and plead for another sign that they still trust in me to carry out their plan. My fax is plugged in and ready to go...wish me luck, I'll need it.