ZEFRANK.COM - message board  

Go Back   ZEFRANK.COM - message board > FICTION PROJECT
FAQ Members List Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools Rating: Thread Rating: 117 votes, 5.00 average. Display Modes
Old 09-13-2007, 04:33 PM   #526
Brynn
constantly amazed
 
Brynn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: in the labyrinth of shared happiness
Posts: 6,206
Dear Tim -
It's always so awkward between us at work, so I thought I'd write this to let you know that I'm not being unfriendly - I actually like you a lot and would even like us to go do something outside of work sometime if you wanted. But I'm a little nervous about talking to you at work because word goes that you really put that temp assistant through the wringer. What office synergy building workshop told you that nude parkouring in D.C. would be a great collaborative warm-up? Sometimes I wonder if I’m just out of touch or stepped into the Twilight Zone when I’m around you. Could you please explain those odd bulges and the way your cubicle always smells like Bon Ami Cleanser with circus peanuts? Also, I heard you're into cat spanking, and I just can't condone that. Other than that, I find your choices of clever t-shirts to be really compelling..."Party Naked!" Ha ha ha! Wherever do you find those? I also find your dead fly collection quite fascinating. Who knew we had so many species in the building!? I guess you do, however, could you please be so kind as to use your own stapler for mounting practice?
And please, please wash your hands when afterwards, when we're in a rush and not thinking clearly, our "sessions" together in the file room are over.
I've probably written too much already. I hope we don't get "busted" - but I just need you to know that although I've consented in the past to do this "thing" with you, I do have some misgivings about all of it, and would like to know at least a little more about you - more for medical emergencies than anything, I guess. After I give you my last payment, I'd really like us to either move forward in our relationship (bringing some much-needed clarity and hopefully intimacy), or bring it to a conclusion so that we may pursue other...other more wholesome - uh - pursuits. Like I said, I really am drawn to you for reasons other than - well, you know.
Thanks. And yes, I will break you for lunch, no problem.
Lucy
__________________
1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles.
2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.
3. Your foot will change direction.

Last edited by Brynn : 09-13-2007 at 04:36 PM.
Brynn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-19-2007, 02:34 AM   #527
Anna
n
 
Anna's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 2,752
My Dearest Sasha,

I just flew in from Tajikistan when I got your note.
hope to see you soon!
bye

Last edited by Anna : 10-29-2007 at 06:12 AM. Reason: pressing matters
Anna is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-29-2007, 06:12 AM   #528
Anna
n
 
Anna's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 2,752
Dear Microsoft,
I hate you!
Anna is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-29-2007, 04:03 PM   #529
Angry Kid Hoyt
How long was I asleep?
 
Angry Kid Hoyt's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: In a bright yellow house next to the cemetery
Posts: 594
Dear Microsoft Customer:
We so don't care.
XOX
MS Customer Support
Angry Kid Hoyt is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-30-2007, 05:56 PM   #530
zero
 
zero's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: l mn
Posts: 13,853
dear miss toodle,

on behalf of virgin galactic, i
zero is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-31-2007, 12:05 AM   #531
Hyakujo's Fox
left hanging
 
Hyakujo's Fox's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: between the click of the light and the start of the dream
Posts: 10,071
dear miss toodle,

on behalf of virgin galactic, i would like to thank you for your recent expression of interest in joining our organisation. every week we receive many applications from enthusiastic and dedicated people from all over the world seeking a position with us, and your letter in particular was one of the most heartfelt applications for employment i have ever read. however,
Hyakujo's Fox is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-31-2007, 01:17 AM   #532
trisherina
meretricious dilettante
 
trisherina's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 11,068
dear miss toodle,

on behalf of virgin galactic, i would like to thank you for your recent expression of interest in joining our organisation. every week we receive many applications from enthusiastic and dedicated people from all over the world seeking a position with us, and your letter in particular was one of the most heartfelt applications for employment i have ever read. however, you seem to have grossly misconstrued our mission, miss toodle. we are not
__________________
Because how we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives. -- Annie Dillard
trisherina is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-31-2007, 05:46 AM   #533
Anna
n
 
Anna's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 2,752
dear miss toodle,

on behalf of virgin galactic, i would like to thank you for your recent expression of interest in joining our organisation. every week we receive many applications from enthusiastic and dedicated people from all over the world seeking a position with us, and your letter in particular was one of the most heartfelt applications for employment i have ever read. however, you seem to have grossly misconstrued our mission, miss toodle, we are not that kind of virgin, on the contrary, we
Anna is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-03-2007, 07:48 AM   #534
zero
 
zero's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: l mn
Posts: 13,853
dear miss toodle,

on behalf of virgin galactic, i would like to thank you for your recent expression of interest in joining our organisation. every week we receive many applications from enthusiastic and dedicated people from all over the world seeking a position with us, and your letter in particular was one of the most heartfelt applications for employment we have ever read. however, you seem to have grossly misconstrued our mission, miss toodle. we are not that kind of virgin, on the contrary, we've "done this before" particularly when it comes to forming exciting new companies. for example, remember virgin cola?

so rather than employment, perhaps we can offer you a very special 10% discount should you book your place in space now. then you, miss toodle, yes, you, can join around 200 virgin galactic astronauts who could venture to space as early as 2009!

training
zero is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-03-2007, 11:43 AM   #535
trisherina
meretricious dilettante
 
trisherina's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 11,068
dear miss toodle,

on behalf of virgin galactic, i would like to thank you for your recent expression of interest in joining our organisation. every week we receive many applications from enthusiastic and dedicated people from all over the world seeking a position with us, and your letter in particular was one of the most heartfelt applications for employment we have ever read. however, you seem to have grossly misconstrued our mission, miss toodle. we are not that kind of virgin, on the contrary, we've "done this before" particularly when it comes to forming exciting new companies. for example, remember virgin cola?

so rather than employment, perhaps we can offer you a very special 10% discount should you book your place in space now. then you, miss toodle, yes, you, can join around 200 virgin galactic astronauts who could venture to space as early as 2009!

training can begin right now, right here, in your very own home. make yourself comfortable in an upright chair, and
__________________
Because how we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives. -- Annie Dillard
trisherina is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-09-2007, 06:38 PM   #536
zero
 
zero's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: l mn
Posts: 13,853
dear miss toodle,

on behalf of virgin galactic, i would like to thank you for your recent expression of interest in joining our organisation. every week we receive many applications from enthusiastic and dedicated people from all over the world seeking a position with us, and your letter in particular was one of the most heartfelt applications for employment we have ever read. however, you seem to have grossly misconstrued our mission, miss toodle. we are not that kind of virgin, on the contrary, we've "done this before" particularly when it comes to forming exciting new companies. for example, remember virgin cola?

so rather than employment, perhaps we can offer you a very special 10% discount should you book your place in space now. then you, miss toodle, yes, you, can join around 200 virgin galactic astronauts who could venture to space as early as 2009!

training can begin right now, right here, in your very own home. make yourself comfortable in an upright chair, and, as you hold the enclosed virgin glactic skymap at arm's length, begin to make deep, guttural
zero is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-10-2007, 12:15 AM   #537
Brynn
constantly amazed
 
Brynn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: in the labyrinth of shared happiness
Posts: 6,206
dear miss toodle,

on behalf of virgin galactic, i would like to thank you for your recent expression of interest in joining our organisation. every week we receive many applications from enthusiastic and dedicated people from all over the world seeking a position with us, and your letter in particular was one of the most heartfelt applications for employment we have ever read. however, you seem to have grossly misconstrued our mission, miss toodle. we are not that kind of virgin, on the contrary, we've "done this before" particularly when it comes to forming exciting new companies. for example, remember virgin cola?

so rather than employment, perhaps we can offer you a very special 10% discount should you book your place in space now. then you, miss toodle, yes, you, can join around 200 virgin galactic astronauts who could venture to space as early as 2009!

training can begin right now, right here, in your very own home. make yourself comfortable in an upright chair, and, as you hold the enclosed virgin glactic skymap at arm's length, begin to make deep, guttural huffing noises as you chew some gum, taking care not to accidentally expectorate.
__________________
1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles.
2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.
3. Your foot will change direction.
Brynn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-12-2007, 01:27 AM   #538
Brynn
constantly amazed
 
Brynn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: in the labyrinth of shared happiness
Posts: 6,206
.
__________________
1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles.
2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.
3. Your foot will change direction.
Brynn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-20-2008, 09:16 AM   #539
Hyakujo's Fox
left hanging
 
Hyakujo's Fox's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: between the click of the light and the start of the dream
Posts: 10,071
dear miss toodle,

on behalf of virgin galactic, i would like to thank you for your recent expression of interest in joining our organisation. every week we receive many applications from enthusiastic and dedicated people from all over the world seeking a position with us, and your letter in particular was one of the most heartfelt applications for employment we have ever read. however, you seem to have grossly misconstrued our mission, miss toodle. we are not that kind of virgin, on the contrary, we've "done this before" particularly when it comes to forming exciting new companies. for example, remember virgin cola?

so rather than employment, perhaps we can offer you a very special 10% discount should you book your place in space now. then you, miss toodle, yes, you, can join around 200 virgin galactic astronauts who could venture to space as early as 2009!

training can begin right now, right here, in your very own home. make yourself comfortable in an upright chair, and, as you hold the enclosed virgin glactic skymap at arm's length, begin to make deep, guttural huffing noises as you chew some gum, taking care not to accidentally expectorate. Soon you'll begin to feel yourself
Hyakujo's Fox is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-20-2008, 07:21 PM   #540
Brynn
constantly amazed
 
Brynn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: in the labyrinth of shared happiness
Posts: 6,206
dear miss toodle,

on behalf of virgin galactic, i would like to thank you for your recent expression of interest in joining our organisation. every week we receive many applications from enthusiastic and dedicated people from all over the world seeking a position with us, and your letter in particular was one of the most heartfelt applications for employment we have ever read. however, you seem to have grossly misconstrued our mission, miss toodle. we are not that kind of virgin, on the contrary, we've "done this before" particularly when it comes to forming exciting new companies. for example, remember virgin cola?

so rather than employment, perhaps we can offer you a very special 10% discount should you book your place in space now. then you, miss toodle, yes, you, can join around 200 virgin galactic astronauts who could venture to space as early as 2009!

training can begin right now, right here, in your very own home. make yourself comfortable in an upright chair, and, as you hold the enclosed virgin glactic skymap at arm's length, begin to make deep, guttural huffing noises as you chew some gum, taking care not to accidentally expectorate. Soon you'll begin to feel yourself clearing out your ears with each swallow of saliva if you happen to live at a high altitude. This is normal. However,
__________________
1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles.
2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.
3. Your foot will change direction.
Brynn is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -3. The time now is 02:51 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.5
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.