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Old 08-17-2004, 12:41 AM   #1
Willow Sylph
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Question Oh Smarty, wherefore art thou?

Where is our Mr. Smart*ss Pants??!
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Knight 1: We are now the Knights who say.... "Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-PTANG! Zoom-Boing! Z'nourrwringmm!"
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Old 08-17-2004, 12:51 AM   #2
Willow Sylph
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"Oh where, oh where has my Smarty gone?
Oh
where, oh where can he be?..."
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Knight 1: We are now no longer the Knights who say "Ni".
Knight 2: NI!
Other Knights: Shh....
Knight 1: We are now the Knights who say.... "Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-PTANG! Zoom-Boing! Z'nourrwringmm!"
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Old 08-17-2004, 01:10 AM   #3
priceyfatprude
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Wink

He flies out of O'Hare @ 11am tomorrow.
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Old 08-17-2004, 01:17 AM   #4
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I hope great fun was had!
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Old 08-17-2004, 01:25 AM   #5
priceyfatprude
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Yes, yes there was.
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Old 08-17-2004, 01:32 AM   #6
zenbabe
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SPILL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 08-17-2004, 01:39 AM   #7
priceyfatprude
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We spent about 9 hours together this weekend. What else would you like to know?
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Old 08-17-2004, 01:40 AM   #8
Audreyvgs
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You little shiit! Spill NOOOOWWWWWWWWW.
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Old 08-17-2004, 01:51 AM   #9
priceyfatprude
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You asked for a play by play. Now you shall have one.

Thursday, Smarty calls me to say he's landed safely in Chi-town. His friends are coming to Milwaukee on Friday to the ART MUSEUM!!!!!! And would I like to meet him there & do lunch?

You bet your sweet bippy I would!

Friday morning, Smarty calls me. Which is good, b/c what w/my 4:30am CST bedtime, I'm still asleep. I arrange to meet him @ the art museum (my favorite place in downtown Mke), sometime between noon & 1. I will call him when I get there. I leave for the bank & then downtown it is! There's a farking Brewer game, but not until later, so I am safe for traffic.

I get there, I park, I make my way up to the atrium, and call. No reception. He must be deep in the bowels of the musee. So I leave a message. I sit down to put the money from the bank envelope into my little black suede zippered thing I carry my ID & money in. As I am doing this, the phone rings.

I look up as I'm answering the phone, and like something out of a movie, there he is. We hug & let his friends know that he's found me & we will meet up with them later.

So we leave, I give him the ten cent tour. Then his friends call to say, "You have the keys to our van". LOL So we go back to the museum on our way to lunch @ Elsa's on the park, which is on Cathedral Square (nice park). Smarty had a pork chop sammich & I had a blue cheese bacon & BBQ sauce burger. *mooooooos* For dessert, we split flourless chocolate cake & fresh strawberries & whipped cream.

Then I dropped him off back @ the museum b/c his friends were ready to leave.

Part Dos coming soon...
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Old 08-17-2004, 02:04 AM   #10
Audreyvgs
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crap, i have to go to bed, will catch this you tomarrow, but DAMN you do good thread, I ought to bark at you more often!



nahhhh, I wouldnt want to abuse the priviledge. hahahahahahaaa
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Old 08-17-2004, 02:14 AM   #11
melissa
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I want to hear more!!! MORE!!














please.
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Old 08-17-2004, 03:41 AM   #12
priceyfatprude
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Part Dos

Sunday morning comes way too soon. That 4:30am bedtime is going to be the death of me. I don't want to go back to the melatonin, but I just might. Anyhoo...

My GBF calls to ask where I am in the "getting ready" process. We have known each other 14 years & why he hasn't figured out that I'm still horizontal when he calls, I'm not sure. Anyhoo, I lie & say I'm already on the freeway. For some reason, he believes me & DOES NOT stop for bagels like he said he was going to. So by the time I get to his house, he is irritated. We get on the freeway, both starving & disgusted with one another.

I am scheduled to call Smarty when we get to the WI/IL state line. I call him & tell him we will call him when we get downtown.

THE EDENS IS THE MOST RETARCULOUS (retarded + ridiculous = retarculous) EXPRESSWAY EVER INVENTED!!!!! The 2 lanes pare down to ONE FARKING LANE which then goes onto a 3 lane highway. WHY NOT BUILD AN EXTRA FARKING LANE?!?!?!?! Everyone in their SUV's knows the lane is ending, but they are speeding up in the right lane anyway, assuming someone will let them in at the last minute. Why do you think you are more important than us? What gives? We had to let one in, and he was yelling stuff out the window at us. Loverly IL driving. In WI, they're called FREEways, not TOLLways. ($1.25, both ways. Use that money to extend the Edens off-ramp to 2 lanes, bitchez!)

So we get to downtown. I realize I haven't been there in a long freaking time. We look for a parking spot for 30-45 minutes, b/c my GBF is a ****ing cheapskate, and also b/c we both feel that this is America, dammit, we should not have to pay for parking. Now it is my turn to be irritated with him. So now we are even. We finally pay $18 to park all day. The deal of the century!

We thought we would meet Smarty @ the Navy Pier. Smarty had no interest in the Navy Pier & we were hungry, so we said we would meet up later. GBF & I ate Italian (Meatballs were almost as good as mine), and walked all the way to the end of the Navy Pier & back, stopping to ride the Ferris Wheel & ogle the boys on jetskis on Lake Michigan. It's a beautiful sunny day in Chi-Town. Meanwhile, Smarty is checking out Millenium Park, which we had no interest in. As we are reaching the street of the Navy Pier, and going back to the car, the phone rings. It's Smarty, wanting to know if I had died. So we arrange to meet on Fairbanks & Ohio.

Smarty meets us & we set off walking. We walk down Michigan Ave a spell, then cross over to some other streets. The architecture of all those buildings is really something to see. I really really love downtown Chicago. We stop at Urban Outfitters where Smarty & I try on sunglasses. I am unemployed & poor, so Smarty gently talks me out of buying the $16 sunglasses, bless his heart! My GBF finds a t-shirt that he thinks is hilarious, and he is mad that I am underwhelmed. He won't let it drop for a good hour how he can't believe I'm underwhelmed. He thought the t-shirt was hilarious & can't understand why I'm not chortling with laughter. Smarty is enjoying watching a live version of Will & Grace.

My priceyfatfeet are killing me by this time, so we decide to hop on the bus, Gus, to take us up to Boystown. We take the bus up to Halsted Street & walk up & down. Gay Pride, baby!!!!! Rainbow flags, leather bars & a bathhouse, oh my!

There is a leather shop, which we go in. There were some very nice things in that store. But we left empty handed. Anyone who tells you an differently is LYING.

We stop at a bar, where I buy us a round of drinks. There are some cute boys there & we talk about how important it is to have a boyfriend that your best friend can stand to have around. Smarty shares with me a multi-million dollar idea he has, and we talk about it for a bit. He still has some architectural things to work on with it. We talk my GBF into wearing his new t-shirt. When he comes out wearing it, I can't stop laughing. It looks better on him than it did in his hand. The day is still young, so we press on.

Then we went into a store called Cupid's Arrow, where I made some purchases, one of them being a refrigerator magnet that has GWB's pic on it. It says, "Like a Rock. Only Dumber." This store had a Ze-related item that Smarty pointed out, which made us both laugh & laugh. (wind-up masturbating monkey)

Then we tried to find a wiener stand in Gaytown. (quit giggling) There was none to be had, and since Smarty & I kind of bonded over our mutual love of Chicago-style hotdogs, we walk until we find one. (I had asked a doorman at a dance club & he looked at me like I was from Mars. Silly faggot. ) Complete hole in the wall joint, but excellent food. Smarty brings the ketchup to the table. I glare at him. He explains it is for his fries. I acquiesce. My GBF grabs the ketchup and goes to put it on his Chicago-style dog. I grab his wrist and tell him no. Smarty & I then explain to him about no ketchup on a Chicago-style dog. Smarty remembers that someone wrote an article about it for the Tribune.

We then walk back up to Boystown & go to the club. The bouncer recognizes me & asks if we found a place. Like the dicksmack I am, I tell him there's a great place 3 blocks up, so he can tell the next stupid tourists who might ask him. He smiles at me. We are all carded, including Smarty, who graduated high school the year I was born, btw.

The bar is packed for a Sunday night. We've been trying to explain the difference between Gay Milwaukee & Gay Chicago throughout the afternoon to Smarty, but this one has us flabbergasted. Sunday nights @ gay clubs in Milwaukee are DEAD. This place is packed. They're playing showtunes on the videos & all the fags are singing along. It's FABULOUS!!! The closest thing we have in Mke is Back to the 80's Friday nights @ LaCage in the basement.

We sit & chat for a bit. I introduce myself & my 2 GBF's to some boys nearby. I snuggle up to Smarty & realize I'm going to miss him.

My GBF & I decide we should prolly head home. We all hop on a bus & head back downtown. Smarty's stop is first, then ours a few blocks later. By this time my feet feel like they're going to fall off. We stop to use the bathroom & when we come out, see a Dunkin donuts/Baskin Robbins. We do not have such luxuries in Mke, so we stop--me for some coffee beans, my GBF for a chocolate shake. Then we head for home.

I pop in a Paul Oakenfold mix (Miami Shadow something) and we drive the 2 hours back to Mke, stopping for gas in Kenosha. I drive home from my GBF's & fall into bed in Waukesha at midnight.

I started a new temp job @ 8.

So that's my story, morning glory. I want to hear if Smarty's version differs at all.
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Old 08-17-2004, 04:06 AM   #13
lapietra
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Awww how wonderful!!!

I'm glad to hear Smarty is snuggly... nothing like a snuggly GBF.
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Old 08-17-2004, 04:25 AM   #14
Audreyvgs
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#### " four stars" The milwaukee gazette
"Great Read, Sister!" The Chicago EarCandy


Epic Tome, PFP! Thanks!!!! Wow, it felt like I was there!!!
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Old 08-17-2004, 04:38 AM   #15
melissa
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What a great adventure!! Thanks for sharing, girl.
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