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Old 05-06-2012, 04:19 AM   #976
brightpearl
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Version 2:
Him: I'll have to keep a really straight face so she doesn't know I peed in her champagne.

Her: I'll have to keep a really straight face so he doesn't know I poisoned his champagne.
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Old 05-07-2012, 08:37 PM   #977
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Thought Bubble on Left:
It can be overwhelming sometimes, the responsibility, prestige, and power, that comes from being one of the leaders of the world. I hope I am projecting an aura of solemnity and grace in combination with confidence appropriate to the occasion.

Thought Bubble on Right:
Ye gods this bitch is boring! I wish Bill were here, he knew how to party.
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Old 05-08-2012, 01:34 AM   #978
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Left Thought Bubble:
Well, Asti is supposed to be drunk very young... this one's so old it seems to have lost its floral characteristics. Oh well, I guess I'll have to just take one for the team.

Right Though Bubble:
Man, I never thought we'd get away with carbonating this Thunderbird... Maybe we can get her to drink some of the MD 20/20 left over from the 2008 olympics.
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Old 05-08-2012, 06:06 PM   #979
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She thinks:
I can't stand these photo ops in front of the flag, I'm certain those stripes make me look chunky.

He thinks:
Sacre Bleu, her ass make that dress look fat.
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Old 04-23-2013, 02:13 PM   #980
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zoek waar je wil, maar het zit in jezelf

oh yeah
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Old 06-21-2013, 06:07 PM   #981
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Old 06-22-2013, 12:03 PM   #982
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Hello, I'm Brooke Woods, from Tooth Fairy Services...you're account is way overdue and I'm here to collect.
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Old 06-23-2013, 06:03 AM   #983
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Richard Simmons: Trust me... when you get to my age, you'll ALL look like Vincent Schiavelli.
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Old 06-24-2013, 08:19 AM   #984
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I see in you - the very marks of death itself!
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Old 06-24-2013, 02:14 PM   #985
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Will Forte: Thank you for saying I'd make a great Doctor. You'd make an excellent Benny Hill. [cue Yakkity Sax]
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Old 06-26-2013, 09:02 PM   #986
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Hold still or I'll never get my other false eyelash out of your nose!
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Old 06-26-2013, 09:39 PM   #987
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Kiss me, Slobberlips, I'm thirsty.
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Old 06-29-2013, 11:49 AM   #988
MoJoRiSin
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Not really sure what I am looking at here, but zinnias are native to
North America
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Old 07-02-2013, 02:48 PM   #989
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