ZEFRANK.COM - message board  

Go Back   ZEFRANK.COM - message board > FICTION PROJECT
FAQ Members List Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools Rating: Thread Rating: 64 votes, 4.97 average. Display Modes
Old 02-15-2007, 01:10 PM   #391
nycwriters
Stuck in T.O.
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Floundering
Posts: 4,134
Oops! sorry .. work was a little hectic this past week ... if I'm still ok to pick .. hrm, I pick .... (ha!) breaking news story. (oh how predictable of me) You are the CNN reporter ... tell us what's happening out there.

Last edited by nycwriters : 02-15-2007 at 01:13 PM.
nycwriters is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-15-2007, 02:49 PM   #392
Coffee
Cheeses Save
 
Coffee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Floating
Posts: 9,204
Breaking news:
Orange Journalism
Prominent NY news editor publishes a shameless attempt to get talentless hacks on a well known message board to create breaking news stories for her, creating a flurry of fictionalized news stories reminiscent of the yellow (orange in this case) journalism of the 1895-1898 era during the circulation battles between news tycoons Joseph Pulitzer and William Randolph Hearst.
Coffee is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-15-2007, 03:44 PM   #393
Marcus Bales
________________
 
Marcus Bales's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: In a coign of the cliff between lowland and highland, at the sea-down's edge between windward and lee, walled round with rocks as an inland island, the ghost of a garden fronts the sea.
Posts: 8,967
Cleveland (CNN) - After two feet of snow, 50 mph winds gusting up to 65 and more, the streets are clear and the residents of Cleveland are saying "The storm missed us."
__________________
My strength is as the strength of eight --
My heart is nearly pure.
Marcus Bales is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2007, 01:41 AM   #394
trisherina
meretricious dilettante
 
trisherina's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 11,068
(Health and Lifestyle) A recent study published in the New England Journal of Medicine indicates that Botox injections and daytime enuresis are positively correlated in women over 50.
trisherina is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2007, 03:35 PM   #395
Brynn
constantly amazed
 
Brynn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: in the labyrinth of shared happiness
Posts: 6,206
Mother Goes Ape Over Dirty Dishes

(Midwest edition, CNN)- Last night at the Havenswood Apartments in Cleveland, neighbor Rose Battie, 54, complained to police that a mother next door was heard "going ballistic" over dried Rice Krispies left in a bowl by her teenage children, calling them "a bunch of punks" and demanding that they rinse their cereal bowls immediately after using instead of "leaving them to form blobs of hardened concrete that take forever to soak off." Thanks to some sophisticated electronic listening devices, she was also able to report that the children's TV privileges had been revoked.
__________________
1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles.
2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.
3. Your foot will change direction.

Last edited by Brynn : 02-16-2007 at 10:46 PM. Reason: revised for your reading pleasure
Brynn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-21-2007, 12:01 AM   #396
nycwriters
Stuck in T.O.
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Floundering
Posts: 4,134
The VERY Stepford Wives category winner goes to Miss Trish for this beauty

(Health and Lifestyle) A recent study published in the New England Journal of Medicine indicates that Botox injections and daytime enuresis are positively correlated in women over 50.

The Baby it's cold outside, bring me another blanket PRONTO award goes to Mr. Bales for this:

Cleveland (CNN) - After two feet of snow, 50 mph winds gusting up to 65 and more, the streets are clear and the residents of Cleveland are saying "The storm missed us."

The OH-MY-GOD-ARE-YOU-TRYING-TO-GIVE-ME-A-HEART-ATTACK-WITH-THAT-LEDE (a lede is 25 words max! ack! .. oh wait, this is the bad writing thread, carry on ) award goes to Miss Brynn with this mouthful:

(Midwest edition, CNN)- Last night at the Havenswood Apartments in Cleveland, neighbor Rose Battie, 54, complained to police that a mother next door was heard "going ballistic" over dried Rice Krispies left in a bowl by her teenage children, calling them "a bunch of punks" and demanding that they rinse their cereal bowls immediately after using instead of "leaving them to form blobs of hardened concrete that take forever to soak off." Thanks to some sophisticated electronic listening devices, she was also able to report that the children's TV privileges had been revoked.

But the clear winner of the "oh my, you've just given me a GREAT idea" category is Mr. Coffee with this beaut:

Orange Journalism
Prominent NY news editor publishes a shameless attempt to get talentless hacks on a well known message board to create breaking news stories for her, creating a flurry of fictionalized news stories reminiscent of the yellow (orange in this case) journalism of the 1895-1898 era during the circulation battles between news tycoons Joseph Pulitzer and William Randolph Hearst.


Congratumulations all!
nycwriters is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-21-2007, 01:05 PM   #397
Coffee
Cheeses Save
 
Coffee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Floating
Posts: 9,204
Thanks, i guess...always a bit of a let down to "win" this thread.

The next category...let the botching begin on:
Small Children's Stories suitable for bedtime...age range 4-7
Coffee is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-21-2007, 01:40 PM   #398
dinzdale
King of the špatnýs
 
dinzdale's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: was that dog
Posts: 9,411
Once apon a time, in the land of Ohio, there lived a man who spent his days drinking from a paper bag, and his nights sleeping in a pool of his own sick.
dinzdale is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-22-2007, 12:54 AM   #399
trisherina
meretricious dilettante
 
trisherina's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 11,068
Your pet's eyes gleam at night because when it gets dark, pets can talk -- but usually they just don't want to and all their stored up words get shiny.
trisherina is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-22-2007, 10:26 PM   #400
Brynn
constantly amazed
 
Brynn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: in the labyrinth of shared happiness
Posts: 6,206
The ladies' bathroom at the rest stop that evening was gray, cold and a little bit scary, especially with the man staring at Mary right outside the door as she crept past him; she felt much better listening to her mother going just one stall away, cursing softly and muttering "Women who pee on the toilet seats were raised by crack whores and apes, Mary baby, so be sure to check before you sit down!"
__________________
1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles.
2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.
3. Your foot will change direction.
Brynn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-24-2007, 12:19 PM   #401
xfox
slightly effective
 
xfox's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: >>>
Posts: 2,404
The clock plodded its slow course before morning's adventure arrived seeming never soon enough in little Carl's mind when frustration and longing to have life on his terms, while night fell admonitions thwarted his enthusiasm and spun confidence into nightmares of the road to hell paved with good intentions.
xfox is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-2007, 01:33 AM   #402
trisherina
meretricious dilettante
 
trisherina's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 11,068
^^
trisherina is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-2007, 12:10 PM   #403
Brynn
constantly amazed
 
Brynn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: in the labyrinth of shared happiness
Posts: 6,206
yeah, that's inspiring
__________________
1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles.
2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.
3. Your foot will change direction.
Brynn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-2007, 12:39 PM   #404
Marcus Bales
________________
 
Marcus Bales's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: In a coign of the cliff between lowland and highland, at the sea-down's edge between windward and lee, walled round with rocks as an inland island, the ghost of a garden fronts the sea.
Posts: 8,967
Once upon a time, in England's fair and pleasant land, there lived a man who spent his days spying on children and his nights kidnapping them for the private use of the aristocracy.
__________________
My strength is as the strength of eight --
My heart is nearly pure.
Marcus Bales is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-10-2007, 01:24 AM   #405
Brynn
constantly amazed
 
Brynn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: in the labyrinth of shared happiness
Posts: 6,206
The Lemur, The Kettle Fairy and the Empty Box

Once upon a time there was a lemur named Charles who loved sleeping in an empty box that a woman who called herself The Kettle Fairy set out for him as she went about humming and sprinkling stale cat food upon the jungle path.
__________________
1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles.
2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.
3. Your foot will change direction.
Brynn is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -3. The time now is 08:15 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.5
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.