|12-05-2006, 09:30 PM||#1|
WhY sO SiRiUs?
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Ta uoy erehw
You don't know Jack...
The lineage is finally revealed. Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says; "You don't know Jack Schitt." Now you can intellectually handle the situation.
Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of the Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack.
In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. They produced four children named Dip Schitt, Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, and Giva Schitt.
However, after being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later remarried Ted Sherlock and since her kids were living with her she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt-Sherlock.
Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loada Schitt and they produced a son of nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt.
Two of Noe's four children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens wedding.
The Schitt-Happens had four children named Dawg, Byrd, Hoarse, and Bull. Bull left home to tour the world and returned with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.
So, now when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt", you can correct them.
This family history was recorded by Crock O. Schitt.
"If there is a bedrock principle of the First Amendment, it is that the government may not prohibit the expression of an idea simply because society finds the idea itself offensive or disagreeable."
-- Justice William J. Brennan
(1906-1997) U. S. Supreme Court Justice
Source: Texas vs. Johnson, 1989
Illegitimi non carborundum...
Whatever doesn't kill you simply makes you... stranger. - Heath Ledger
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