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Old 08-11-2006, 10:19 AM   #436
Penut
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Dear neighbor,

While taking my dog for a walk last week, I happened to stroll pass your house. You really should close your curtains at night because I saw that your toilet seat had been left up. I could not beleive my eyes that such an unwrittin felony had occured. Do you not have any self respect? What would you do if you walked past my window and
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Old 08-13-2006, 01:49 AM   #437
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Dear neighbor,

While taking my dog for a walk last week, I happened to stroll pass your house. You really should close your curtains at night because I saw that your toilet seat had been left up. I could not beleive my eyes that such an unwrittin felony had occured. Do you not have any self respect? What would you do if you walked past my window and saw me jump out. That would be
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Old 08-13-2006, 10:57 PM   #438
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Dear neighbor,

While taking my dog for a walk last week, I happened to stroll pass your house. You really should close your curtains at night because I saw that your toilet seat had been left up. I could not beleive my eyes that such an unwrittin felony had occured. Do you not have any self respect? What would you do if you walked past my window and saw me jump out. That would be, I'm sure you will agree, a
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Old 08-14-2006, 02:59 AM   #439
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Dear neighbor,

While taking my dog for a walk last week, I happened to stroll pass your house. You really should close your curtains at night because I saw that your toilet seat had been left up. I could not beleive my eyes that such an unwrittin felony had occured. Do you not have any self respect? What would you do if you walked past my window and saw me jump out. That would be, I'm sure you will agree, an incredible
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Old 08-25-2006, 08:18 AM   #440
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Dear neighbor,

While taking my dog for a walk last week, I happened to stroll pass your house. You really should close your curtains at night because I saw that your toilet seat had been left up. I could not beleive my eyes that such an unwrittin felony had occured. Do you not have any self respect? What would you do if you walked past my window and saw me jump out. That would be, I'm sure you will agree, an incredible sight - me, jumping out of my toilet. And I can't help but question your choice of decor as well.
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Old 09-26-2006, 07:13 AM   #441
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dear neighbor,

while taking my dog for a walk last week i happened to stroll pass your house. you really should close your curtains at night because i saw that your toilet seat had been left up. i could not believe my eyes that such an unwritten felony had occured. do you not have any self respect? what would you do if you walked past my window and saw me jump out. that would be, i'm sure you will agree, an incredible sight - me, jumping out of my toilet. and i can't help but question your choice of decor as well. it must have taken you many, many hours to crochet it all. but then i suppose that's why you leave the curtains open and the whole place lit up like the blackpool illuminations.

i'll be taking rory out for his usual walkies tonight at around 9pm and, assuming you're okay with it, it i'd like to bring mum, dad, horace, daphnie, maggie and the twins along for a quick look. if you could crank things up around that time i'd be very grateful.

so until then, as they say, "if i don't see you through the week, i'll see you through the window!"


- angus sneddon (no. 32 with the fountain)

Last edited by zero : 09-27-2006 at 10:20 AM.
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Old 09-26-2006, 07:14 AM   #442
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dear readers,
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Old 09-26-2006, 05:50 PM   #443
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dear readers,
it has come to my attention that people seem to be dropping off like flies lately, and
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1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles.
2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.
3. Your foot will change direction.
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Old 09-27-2006, 04:42 AM   #444
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dear readers,

it has come to my attention that people seem to be dropping off like flies lately, and it is with that in mind that this autumn edition of humourous ryhmster
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Old 09-27-2006, 05:35 AM   #445
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dear readers,

it has come to my attention that people seem to be dropping off like flies lately, and it is with that in mind that this autumn edition of humourous ryhmster will feature several sensational new departments for your increased gratification. Gladys Bentley's regular column From my Escritoire... has been
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Old 09-27-2006, 05:41 PM   #446
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dear readers,

it has come to my attention that people seem to be dropping off like flies lately, and it is with that in mind that this autumn edition of humourous ryhmster will feature several sensational new departments for your increased gratification. Gladys Bentley's regular column From my Escritoire... has been, for instance, temporarily discontinued due to the tragic fact that Ms. Bentley recently choked to death on a chicken bone. Sadly and strangely enough, the same fate has befallen that of Teen Meter's Faris Chinley, another one of our beloved staff writers. We sincerely extend our condolences to their families. If there is a bright side to all this darkness, it
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1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles.
2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.
3. Your foot will change direction.
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Old 09-28-2006, 05:08 AM   #447
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dear readers,

it has come to my attention that people seem to be dropping off like flies lately and it is with that in mind that this, our autumn edition of humourous rhymster magazine will feature several sensational new departments for your increased gratification.

Gladys Bentley's regular column From my Escritoire... has been, for instance, temporarily discontinued due to the tragic fact that Ms. Bentley recently choked to death on a chicken bone. Sadly and strangely enough, the same fate has befallen that of Teen Meter's Faris Chinley, another one of our beloved staff writers. We sincerely extend our condolences to their families.

If there is a bright side to all this darkness, it must surely be the opportunity that it affords us to bring to you such gems as former SAS poet-in-residence bill "bruiser" byron's hilarious ninja sonnets (p.7). we've also expanded our ding-a-ling dactyls(p.17) for those who prefer their comic verse served up with a side order of chuckles rather outright bellylaughs. and there's a real treat for all you wacky limericists - a special pull-out-and-keep wallchart

Last edited by zero : 09-28-2006 at 11:45 AM.
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Old 09-28-2006, 03:30 PM   #448
Brynn
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dear readers,

it has come to my attention that people seem to be dropping off like flies lately and it is with that in mind that this, our autumn edition of humourous rhymster magazine will feature several sensational new departments for your increased gratification.

Gladys Bentley's regular column From my Escritoire... has been, for instance, temporarily discontinued due to the tragic fact that Ms. Bentley recently choked to death on a chicken bone. Sadly and strangely enough, the same fate has befallen that of Teen Meter's Faris Chinley, another one of our beloved staff writers. We sincerely extend our condolences to their families.

If there is a bright side to all this darkness, it must surely be the opportunity that it affords us to bring to you such gems as former SAS poet-in-residence bill "bruiser" byron's hilarious ninja sonnets (p.7). we've also expanded our ding-a-ling dactyls(p.17) for those who prefer their comic verse served up with a side order of chuckles rather outright bellylaughs. and there's a real treat for all you wacky limericists - a special pull-out-and-keep wallchart of common rhymes and their respective meters in numerical order, not to mention a bonus feature of what poet has insulted whom lately, how they retaliated, and what it all means to you, dear reader!
__________________
1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles.
2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.
3. Your foot will change direction.
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Old 09-29-2006, 07:40 AM   #449
zero
 
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dear readers,

it has come to my attention that people seem to be dropping off like flies lately and it is with that in mind that this, our autumn edition of humourous rhymster magazine will feature several sensational new departments for your increased gratification.

Gladys Bentley's regular column From my Escritoire... has been, for instance, temporarily discontinued due to the tragic fact that Ms. Bentley recently choked to death on a chicken bone. Sadly and strangely enough, the same fate has befallen Teen Meter's Faris Chinley, another one of our beloved staff writers. we sincerely extend our condolences to their families.

if there is a bright side to all this darkness, it must surely be the opportunity that it has afforded us to bring to you such gems as former SAS poet-in-residence bill "bruiser" byron's hilarious ninja sonnets (p.7). we've also expanded our ding-a-ling dactyls(p.17) for those who prefer their comic verse served up with a side order of chuckles rather than outright bellylaughs. and there's a real treat for all you wacky limericists. it's a special pull-out-and-keep wallchart of common rhymes and their respective meters in numerical order, not to mention a bonus feature of what poet has insulted whom lately, how they retaliated, and what it all means to you, dear reader!

finally, humourous rhymster is proud to introduce yet another brand new poetic form which recently evolved on the internet. turn to page 27, reach for your slang dictionaries ladies and gentlemen, and take your partners for "that's close enough" quarrelsome quatrains!


see you in our spring issue
-=hickory "doc" dickory - editor
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Old 10-06-2006, 04:48 AM   #450
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dearest friend
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