I'm back, answer these damn questions!

[noxxville]

Since it's been awhile, I thought I'd break out some questions of my own....ya know, for old times sake.

1. When is the last time you personally saw a cow? In real life, tv doesn't count. What was the cow doing?

2. Why does everything taste like chicken?

3. If you had to do one of the following, which would you do?
a. Give yourself a nasty papercut on your tongue
b. Drink a shrimp, cottage cheese, goat liver and eggplant smoothie (1 liter)
c. Get your employers business name tattooed on your arm, in a visible place
d. Swim 400 metes in ice water

4. Which month of the year do you like the least and why?

5. If you had to name a bowling ball, what would you name it?

6. Which sport do you find to be the most senseless?

7. Name the TV celebrity you'd most like to run down with your car.

8. How did you find out that there was no Santa Claus (or Easter Bunny or Tooth Fairy, whichever works for you)?

9. Today's Shorts: Are they short enough?

10. Where are my pants?

11. How much would it take to get you to eat a can of dog food (the whole can)?

[masterofNone]

1. When is the last time you personally saw a cow? In real life, tv doesn't count. What was the cow doing?
sunday. there were a number of them. they were, mostly, eating grass.

2. Why does everything taste like chicken?
chickens evolved from dinosaurs. most other things did too. so it's not so much that everything tastes like chicken, it's that everything tastes like dinosaur.

3. If you had to do one of the following, which would you do?
a. Give yourself a nasty papercut on your tongue
b. Drink a shrimp, cottage cheese, goat liver and eggplant smoothie (1 liter)
c. Get your employers business name tattooed on your arm, in a visible place
d. Swim 400 metes in ice water
c. i'm self employed.

4. Which month of the year do you like the least and why?
january. cold. dark. event laden.

5. If you had to name a bowling ball, what would you name it?
booger two

6. Which sport do you find to be the most senseless?
golf

7. Name the TV celebrity you'd most like to run down with your car.
jay leno

8. How did you find out that there was no Santa Claus (or Easter Bunny or Tooth Fairy, whichever works for you)?
my bastard brother

9. Today's Shorts: Are they short enough?
no... i miss the 70s basketball uniforms

10. Where are my pants?
sorry... i'll wash them and get them back to you.

11. How much would it take to get you to eat a can of dog food (the whole can)?
extreme poverty

[red]

1. When is the last time you personally saw a cow? In real life, tv doesn't count. What was the cow doing?
Last year driving from Houston to San Antonio. I saw a heard of them. They were standing.

2. Why does everything taste like chicken?
Really good PR

3. If you had to do one of the following, which would you do?
d. Swim 400 metes in ice water

4. Which month of the year do you like the least and why?
Hmmm. I guess December because it gets dark so early.

5. If you had to name a bowling ball, what would you name it?
Mjölnir

6. Which sport do you find to be the most senseless?
boxing

7. Name the TV celebrity you'd most like to run down with your car.
Bennifer

8. How did you find out that there was no Santa Claus (or Easter Bunny or Tooth Fairy, whichever works for you)?
I saw my dad placing gifts. I think I already knew so it wasn't a heartbreaker for me.

9. Today's Shorts: Are they short enough?
Movie shorts-yes
basketball players shorts-no, let's go back to 70s style. I like leg.

10. Where are my pants?
in the dryer?

11. How much would it take to get you to eat a can of dog food (the whole can)?
hmmm. If you could get my sisters to reconcile, I'll do it. We are talking the small can, right?

[bealeblues]

1. When is the last time you personally saw a cow? In real life, tv doesn't count. What was the cow doing?

over thanksgiving. it's not a question of what the cow was doing as much as it would be who was doing the cow....

2. Why does everything taste like chicken?

chick-fil-a conspiracy

3. If you had to do one of the following, which would you do?
a. Give yourself a nasty papercut on your tongue
b. Drink a shrimp, cottage cheese, goat liver and eggplant smoothie (1 liter)
c. Get your employers business name tattooed on your arm, in a visible place
d. Swim 400 metes in ice water

swim

4. Which month of the year do you like the least and why?

february. still cold and the anticipation for spring is palpable

5. If you had to name a bowling ball, what would you name it?

boudreaux

6. Which sport do you find to be the most senseless?

soccer. can't use your hands. (sorry jay)

7. Name the TV celebrity you'd most like to run down with your car.

ashley judd's husband

8. How did you find out that there was no Santa Claus (or Easter Bunny or Tooth Fairy, whichever works for you)?

by reading this post. thanks a lot noxx

9. Today's Shorts: Are they short enough?

ask your proctologist

10. Where are my pants?

ask your proctologist

11. How much would it take to get you to eat a can of dog food (the whole can)?

what flavo(u)r?

[malina]

1. When is the last time you personally saw a cow? In real life, tv doesn't count. What was the cow doing?
last summer. it was standing in its own dung, blankly staring into space.

2. Why does everything taste like chicken?
maybe you should brush your teeth more often

3. If you had to do one of the following, which would you do?
a. Give yourself a nasty papercut on your tongue
b. Drink a shrimp, cottage cheese, goat liver and eggplant smoothie (1 liter)
c. Get your employers business name tattooed on your arm, in a visible place
d. Swim 400 metes in ice water
papercut on tongue

4. Which month of the year do you like the least and why?
january and february equally - icky snow and darkness

5. If you had to name a bowling ball, what would you name it?
herbert

6. Which sport do you find to be the most senseless?
baseball

7. Name the TV celebrity you'd most like to run down with your car.
i can't think of anyone that interests me that much..

8. How did you find out that there was no Santa Claus (or Easter Bunny or Tooth Fairy, whichever works for you)?
i saw my dad with an 'easter bunny' puppet on his hand outside my bedroom window when i was 4

9. Today's Shorts: Are they short enough?
yappa

10. Where are my pants?
right where you want them to be

11. How much would it take to get you to eat a can of dog food (the whole can)?
how much what? late stages of schizophrenia? i don't know...

[bealeblues]

originally posted by my former tundralove
6. Which sport do you find to be the most senseless? baseball

we're divorced.

[jaymirror]

1. When is the last time you personally saw a cow? In real life, tv doesn't count. What was the cow doing?

Along the motorway. Eating grass. Appearetly that's what they do most of the time.

2. Why does everything taste like chicken?

How the hell would i know?

3. If you had to do one of the following, which would you do?
a. Give yourself a nasty papercut on your tongue
b. Drink a shrimp, cottage cheese, goat liver and eggplant smoothie (1 liter)
c. Get your employers business name tattooed on your arm, in a visible place
d. Swim 400 metes in ice water

i'll do the papercut thing, but hell why?

4. Which month of the year do you like the least and why?

march because i won't be in italy to enjoy spring and i'll have to wait for it till late april

5. If you had to name a bowling ball, what would you name it?

geeweez

6. Which sport do you find to be the most senseless?

ow about curling?

7. Name the TV celebrity you'd most like to run down with your car.

celine dion

8. How did you find out that there was no Santa Claus (or Easter Bunny or Tooth Fairy, whichever works for you)?

because you just told me jerk

9. Today's Shorts: Are they short enough?

mine are

10. Where are my pants?

i've hidden them under my pillow so you have to kneel naked to look for them

11. How much would it take to get you to eat a can of dog food (the whole can)?

not much, i've tasted it once and it was ok

[Red Princess]

Originally posted by noxxville


1. When is the last time you personally saw a cow? In real life, tv doesn't count. What was the cow doing?

tuesday, i drive by a dairy farm on the way home from the community college, it was standing there stinking.

2. Why does everything taste like chicken?

because i said so

3. If you had to do one of the following, which would you do?
a. Give yourself a nasty papercut on your tongue
b. Drink a shrimp, cottage cheese, goat liver and eggplant smoothie (1 liter)
c. Get your employers business name tattooed on your arm, in a visible place
d. Swim 400 metes in ice water

business name tattoo, am also self employed

4. Which month of the year do you like the least and why?

december-xmas

5. If you had to name a bowling ball, what would you name it?

PinDunk

6. Which sport do you find to be the most senseless?

boxing

7. Name the TV celebrity you'd most like to run down with your car.

anyone who has appeared in Fear Factor. obvious reasons: to prevent them from breeding

8. How did you find out that there was no Santa Claus (or Easter Bunny or Tooth Fairy, whichever works for you)?

big brothers.

9. Today's Shorts: Are they short enough?

yes

10. Where are my pants?

where you left them

11. How much would it take to get you to eat a can of dog food (the whole can)?

buy me a new G5 and an iPod

[priceyfatprude]

1. When is the last time you personally saw a cow? In real life, tv doesn't count. What was the cow doing?

Last fall, they were grazing in the field.

2. Why does everything taste like chicken?

It doesn't. Lobster tastes like nothing.

3. If you had to do one of the following, which would you do?
a. Give yourself a nasty papercut on your tongue
b. Drink a shrimp, cottage cheese, goat liver and eggplant smoothie (1 liter)
c. Get your employers business name tattooed on your arm, in a visible place
d. Swim 400 metes in ice water

Papercut or swim

4. Which month of the year do you like the least and why?

January b/c it's too fvcking long & too fvcking cold.

5. If you had to name a bowling ball, what would you name it?

Dave.

6. Which sport do you find to be the most senseless?

WWF

7. Name the TV celebrity you'd most like to run down with your car.

Joan/Melissa Rivers.

8. How did you find out that there was no Santa Claus (or Easter Bunny or Tooth Fairy, whichever works for you)?

Michelle, a neighbor kid.

9. Today's Shorts: Are they short enough?

Yep.

10. Where are my pants?

On your floor.

11. How much would it take to get you to eat a can of dog food (the whole can)?

Depends on what kind of dog food it was, some of those look better than the school lunches we used to get.

[malina]

Originally posted by bealeblues
we're divorced.

do i get alimony?

[Frieda]

1. When is the last time you personally saw a cow? In real life, tv doesn't count. What was the cow doing?
25 minutes ago, some were standing, others were eating grass

2. Why does everything taste like chicken?
because your taste buds have gone numb

3. If you had to do one of the following, which would you do?
a. Give yourself a nasty papercut on your tongue
b. Drink a shrimp, cottage cheese, goat liver and eggplant smoothie (1 liter)
c. Get your employers business name tattooed on your arm, in a visible place
d. Swim 400 metes in ice water
i'd do the papercut

4. Which month of the year do you like the least and why?
february: everybody goes skiing and i don't

5. If you had to name a bowling ball, what would you name it?
bella

6. Which sport do you find to be the most senseless?
curling

7. Name the TV celebrity you'd most like to run down with your car.
uhh.. all of them?

8. How did you find out that there was no Santa Claus (or Easter Bunny or Tooth Fairy, whichever works for you)?
kids at school

9. Today's Shorts: Are they short enough?
i don't know, let me see!

10. Where are my pants?
can't see that from here..

11. How much would it take to get you to eat a can of dog food (the whole can)?
uhh.. 500 euros

[bealeblues]

originally posted by the ex. mrs. beale
do i get alimony?

i'll put in the special spot for you to 'retrieve' every month... how's that?

[malina]

[Deviate]

1. When is the last time you personally saw a cow? In real life, tv doesn't count. What was the cow doing?
December 27th. getting a drink.

2. Why does everything taste like chicken?
it doesn't.

3. If you had to do one of the following, which would you do?
a. Give yourself a nasty papercut on your tongue

4. Which month of the year do you like the least and why?
January - just wastes time until fish fry, Mardi Gras and Spring.

5. If you had to name a bowling ball, what would you name it?
Senior VonTuttenstuff

6. Which sport do you find to be the most senseless?
NASCAR RACING

7. Name the TV celebrity you'd most like to run down with your car.
TV Celebrity??? Patrica f*cking Heaton. annoying piece of sh*t.

8. How did you find out that there was no Santa Claus (or Easter Bunny or Tooth Fairy, whichever works for you)?
i asked my mother if there was a Santa Claus. she asked me what i thought and i said, yes, i think that there is. then i asked if there was an Easter Bunny. she, again, asked what i thought and i said, "c'mon, Mom, a giant rabbit hopping around the neighbood delivering Easter eggs?"

9. Today's Shorts: Are they short enough?
too short. i like to leave something to the imagination. and i should not have to divert my eyes from some 14 year old's buttcheeks as she walks through a Target.

10. Where are my pants?
in Oregon

11. How much would it take to get you to eat a can of dog food (the whole can)?
depends on what you'll give me, but i'd probably do it for a hundie.

1. When is the last time you personally saw a cow? In real life, tv doesn't count. What was the cow doing?

Umm, I don't even remember but it was probably eating grass when I saw it.

2. Why does everything taste like chicken?

Chicken is the universal taste of everything

3. If you had to do one of the following, which would you do?
a. Give yourself a nasty papercut on your tongue
b. Drink a shrimp, cottage cheese, goat liver and eggplant smoothie (1 liter)
c. Get your employers business name tattooed on your arm, in a visible place
d. Swim 400 metes in ice water

I'll go with C.

4. Which month of the year do you like the least and why?

If I'm in Vegas, it's definitely August.

5. If you had to name a bowling ball, what would you name it?

Bowly

6. Which sport do you find to be the most senseless?

ummm Cross Country. I mean c'mon, running is not fun.

7. Name the TV celebrity you'd most like to run down with your car.

hm... I'm not sure.

8. How did you find out that there was no Santa Claus (or Easter Bunny or Tooth Fairy, whichever works for you)?

I don't remember.

9. Today's Shorts: Are they short enough?

Too short.

10. Where are my pants?

In your back pocket

11. How much would it take to get you to eat a can of dog food (the whole can)?

Umm like 500 bucks