04-04-2009, 10:33 PM
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#1 |
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: In a coign of the cliff between lowland and highland, at the sea-down's edge between windward and lee, walled round with rocks as an inland island, the ghost of a garden fronts the sea.
Posts: 8,967
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Astonishing Factishes
In this thread we invent facts that sound as if they might be true, if you don't read carefully or think too much.
Touching the finial at the bottom of a staircase means you're horny.
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My strength is as the strength of eight -- My heart is nearly pure. |
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04-05-2009, 12:52 AM
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#2 |
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meretricious dilettante
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 11,068
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drinking red wine gives you bunions
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Because how we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives. -- Annie Dillard |
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04-05-2009, 03:55 AM
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#3 |
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oi
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 5,208
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If this thread reminds you of extremely misguided notions you will get lucky today.
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04-05-2009, 02:43 PM
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#4 |
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________________
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: In a coign of the cliff between lowland and highland, at the sea-down's edge between windward and lee, walled round with rocks as an inland island, the ghost of a garden fronts the sea.
Posts: 8,967
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You'll get lucky on the day you post to this thread.
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My strength is as the strength of eight -- My heart is nearly pure. |
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04-05-2009, 06:03 PM
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#5 |
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unbelievable
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 5,664
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If you open a book to a random page and read the paragraph you then point to, it means something.
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From stone tablets to html code, it's not lost on me. |
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04-06-2009, 12:37 PM
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#6 |
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________________
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: In a coign of the cliff between lowland and highland, at the sea-down's edge between windward and lee, walled round with rocks as an inland island, the ghost of a garden fronts the sea.
Posts: 8,967
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If you go back to open the refrigerator door again after you couldn't figure out what you want to eat, there'll be something new and desireable in there that sounds just right.
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My strength is as the strength of eight -- My heart is nearly pure. |
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04-11-2009, 02:20 PM
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#7 |
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Amateur Human
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: The Hills north of Mouseland, sunny FLA.
Posts: 1,264
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Falling drops are the surest sign of rain.
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...or words to that effect. |
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04-20-2009, 07:58 AM
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#8 |
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________________
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: In a coign of the cliff between lowland and highland, at the sea-down's edge between windward and lee, walled round with rocks as an inland island, the ghost of a garden fronts the sea.
Posts: 8,967
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Don't look up the word smegma; no, just don't do it.
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My strength is as the strength of eight -- My heart is nearly pure. |
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04-20-2009, 12:14 PM
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#9 |
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oi
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 5,208
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Look before you leap; limp after you look.
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04-20-2009, 07:50 PM
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#10 |
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________________
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: In a coign of the cliff between lowland and highland, at the sea-down's edge between windward and lee, walled round with rocks as an inland island, the ghost of a garden fronts the sea.
Posts: 8,967
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An investigation into auto accidents by the Big Three automakers, using "black box" technology similar to that used in the airlines, in a limited test run of 10,000 cars across the United States reveals that the last words heard on most tapes are "Oh, shit," except in Texas, Louisiana, Alabama, Georgia, Arkansas, North and South Carolina, and Tennesse where the most common last words are "Here, hold my beer and watch this!"
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My strength is as the strength of eight -- My heart is nearly pure. |
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05-02-2009, 10:32 AM
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#11 |
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Amateur Human
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: The Hills north of Mouseland, sunny FLA.
Posts: 1,264
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Napoleon Bonaparte labored under the delusion that he was, in fact, Alexander the Great.
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...or words to that effect. |
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05-21-2009, 05:43 PM
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#12 |
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constantly amazed
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: in the labyrinth of shared happiness
Posts: 6,206
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Not too many people are aware of the fact that a final vinegar rinse in one's freshly washed hair serves as a powerful aphrodisiac.
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1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles. 2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand. 3. Your foot will change direction. |
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05-21-2009, 05:59 PM
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#13 |
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earth worker
Join Date: May 2006
Location: on the planet
Posts: 5,844
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drinking Pabst Blue Ribbon makes one proof against hail
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05-21-2009, 08:02 PM
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#14 |
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________________
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: In a coign of the cliff between lowland and highland, at the sea-down's edge between windward and lee, walled round with rocks as an inland island, the ghost of a garden fronts the sea.
Posts: 8,967
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If you open the windows on a warm day it turns your neighbors' radios on. Loud.
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My strength is as the strength of eight -- My heart is nearly pure. |
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05-28-2009, 02:48 PM
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#15 |
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Amateur Human
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: The Hills north of Mouseland, sunny FLA.
Posts: 1,264
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An index finger hastily moistened in the mouth and then held aloft like a totem will mystically prevent an amber caution light from changing to red.
This factish is a bona fide one, dating back to the late sixties, when it was invented by one David Ferguson, keyboard player for a regional garage band called Sergeant Snorkel's Coin Laundry and Diaper Service. The other band members swore by it, and I myself would testify that it has helped me avoid a number of moving violations over the intervening years. Just to be clear, the technique, known as the "Fergie Finger", must be accompanied by the reverent recitation of the following scrap of doggerel: Fergie finger saved the day Doo dah, doo dah 'Cause I licked it this-a way All de doo dah day Don't worry. Stephen Foster cannot sue. I had my lawyer check.
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...or words to that effect. |
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