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Old 05-24-2009, 01:24 PM   #106
dddrum
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Wal now, as I recomalect, ta concoct a Lemon Bookend, ya need two shot glasses fulla purely natch'l concentrated lemon juice, squoze outen one nem purely natch'l plaskit lemons, an' also plus onna other hand, ya gotsta have a couple hunnerd an' fifty milliliters of Absolut Citron, yunnastan.

Whatchawanna do is:

1.) Knock back a shot of lemon juice.

2.) Pick up that big bad bottle o' vodka and chug that sumbitch.

3.) Hit the other shot of lemon juice.

4.) Bob jes' mought possumbly be yer uncle.


Oop. Thet reminders me: jus' what is that time tested ol' fambly receipt (handed down over countless generalizations) fer a Bob's Your Uncle??
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Old 05-26-2009, 10:06 AM   #107
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Now that takes me back. A Bob's Your Uncle is an oldie, but a very popular favorite.

Robert Peel, later Sir, invented the modern police force, including all the nepotism and corruption that goes with it. If you were related to Sir Robert, known to his family as "Uncle Bob", you could get things done, or not done, very quickly. Soon enough, if you had enough money, or something else, to trade, then Bob would be your Uncle, too. So to get something done or covered up could be pretty pricey, but it could be done quickly if Bob's your uncle.

Oh, the drink? Well that's merely another name for standing the saloon a round of drinks to get out of having to fight the tough guy. A Bob's Your Uncle is any kind of drink that anyone in the bar wants.

But what's a Power Strip?
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Old 11-05-2010, 06:37 PM   #108
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Oooooh, a Power Strip is a bit of a knocker:

2 ounces good-quality black pepper vodka
1/4 ounce creme de violette (no artificial flavors, please)
1 ounce freshly-squeezed lemon juice
1/4 ounce orange simple syrup

1 package grape Pop Rocks

Lick the back of your hand, pour pop rocks on it, down the drink, lick the Pop Rocks.

Anyone remember what's in a Hairball?
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Old 11-07-2010, 11:29 AM   #109
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A Hairball is a great picker-upper in the morning:

in a Manhattan glass, two mellon-ball-sized scoops of Ben & Jerry's Chocolate Fudge Brownie ice cream, mashed with the back of the melon-baller into ovoids;

pour 4 oz of cabernet sauvignon over the ice cream;

sprinkle with a single minced maraschino cherry;

serve!

That's a memory! But what about the legendary but seldom-seen Stephen King? Who knows how to make one of THOSE?
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Old 11-07-2010, 01:18 PM   #110
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Quote:
Originally Posted by daverbee View Post
A Stephen King is three tabs of Owsley's best taken with lime juice and grenadine.
What I think you meant to ask for is a Steve King named after Rep. Steve King (R) of Iowa:

2 Oz Malt Liquor (Colt 45, from a 40oz)
2 Oz Tequila
1/2 oz Rosewater

Shake until frothy and release just before any election.

For tonight I'd like to make a pitcher of Pitocin Punch but I can't reach our O.B... Can anyone help?
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Old 11-16-2010, 10:16 PM   #111
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Pitocin Punch is easy to make and easier to drink, but you have to have the right implements for the results.

2 oz of 180 proof moonshine
2 oz of creme de menthe
1 catcher's mitt

After your pregnant partner is properly positioned in the stirrups, administer the drink, then hurry to the midwife spot with the catcher's mitt ready!

That's all fun and games, but what about the famous Connecting Tone? Anybody got a favorite recipe for that?
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Old 11-17-2010, 02:42 PM   #112
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Ah, the Connecting Tone, I haven't tried to make one of those in years, 'cuz I ran out of booze last time.

Because, you see, the Connecting Tone is not so much a recipe as a process.
One takes every bottle from a well stocked liquor cabinet and two crystal highball glasses, one must then randomly select (blindfolded) and then pour (blindfold off) one tbsp. from different bottles into each glass, then tap each of the glasses with a metal mixing spoon and compare the tones using an electronic tuner gauging whether the tones are exactly the same...they most probably won't be due to the varying density of different spirits unless one really knows their spirits like back of their hand. If the tones do not match (or harmonize), then a different spirit (no spirit may be used a second time until every spirit has been used once) is selected by the same process and again one Tbsp is poured into each glass and the tone check done again, and again, and again...until the tones match.
Once the notes match the two drinks are poured together into a 20 oz. cognac snifter. The tone of the snifter is checked (for curiosity sake basically) and the drink is traditionally consumed in one gulp, if possible. This drink can be problematic for a new mix-ologist to prepare as it takes some inkling of the specific gravities of the contents of the entire bar in order to avoid eventually pouring the entire contents of the bar onto the bar 1 tbsp at a time. Naturally this can be a very long and expensive process if one has no clue which spirits are denser or lighter, or can take 1 Tbsp each if the bartender is experienced and or/a cheep cheating bastard with a dodgy blindfold. However most bartenders refuse to serve this due to time and expense involved, as well as the difficulty in gauging an accurate tone in a noisy bar not to mention the risk of trying to run a business while intermittently blindfolded.

The Connecting Tone is best made as a collaborative party drink in which each participant in turn adds a tbsp. to each glass and checks the tone, whoever connects the tone then DRINK DRINK DRINKs! In a party situation it is traditional for all participants other than the DRINKER to hum the resultant Cognac snifter tone while the completed Connecting Tone is consumed.


Yep, Connecting Tone is indeed fun and games when done properly...but I'm in the mood for something more peaceful and exotic, would someone please tell me how to make me an Island Sunrise?
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Old 11-18-2010, 12:52 AM   #113
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First of all, you can only make an Island Sunrise in the morning. We let it slide and tried making it for Brunch one lazy Sunday morning, but by then the islanders were all "the end is nigh!". And the animals what with the crowing and fussing! Not worth the trouble, just get up and make it rise when you're supposed to.

An Island sunrise is essentially a variation on the standard Island Voodoo, consisting of

* 1 1/2 oz rye whiskey
* 1 oz Averna
* 1/2 oz limoncello
* flamed orange peel for garnish

With the addition of one Denny's Grand Slam Meal (or equivalent breakfast conglomeration)


Preparation:

1. Combine all ingredients in a (fairly loarge) cocktail shaker filled with ice.
2. Stir 30 times.
3. Strain into a cocktail glass.
4. Garnish with a flamed orange peel.
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Old 11-18-2010, 12:55 AM   #114
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in b4 Marcus Bales appropriates the phrase
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bman View Post
just get up and make it rise when you're supposed to.

-_-

Islanders and their sun worship be damned, anyone know how to make a Total Eclipse?

Last edited by Bman : 11-18-2010 at 10:12 AM.
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Old 12-10-2010, 05:33 PM   #115
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1 glass Guinness
1 hard boiled tea egg

Pour the Guinness *without head* so that the top of the glass has a dark silky appearance. Place the tea egg into the glass. You'll see an eclipse each time you take a sip.

I desperately want to know what's in a Office Xmas Party but I can't remember from the one I had last year, can anyone help?
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Old 02-04-2011, 02:48 PM   #116
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There's not much to an Office Xmas Party!

You need a gargantuan punch bowl, a watermelon, a large phillips-head screwdriver, a box of ExtraLong Straws, a lot of ice, and two bottles of vodka.

An hour before the party, fill the bowl half full of ice, put the watermelon in it, fill the bowl with ice up over as much of the watermelon as you can. Punch half a dozen holes in the watermelon with the screwdriver along one side, and then half a dozen more along the other side. In the middle of the watermelon punch a larger hole and pour in both bottles of vodka.

Let stand for an hour or two. As party time approaches, carefully lift watermelon out of the bowl, replace the ice completely, and put the watermelon back in the bowl.

Stick the ExtraLong Straws in the holes, and serve.

Even if you're not having an office xmas party, you'll have an office xmas party!

That's a swell drink, but who remembers how to make an Oxford Don?
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