How I Burned my Dink By JesusTitties - ZEFRANK.COM

JesusTitties · 07-26-2003, 11:57 PM

One morning, i woke up on my day off - and because i had my own flat, i had the privacy to walk around, sleep and do anything i want in the nude. As i normally did.

What was there to have for breakfast? I wondered.. and yes, i secretly pumped my fist as i noticed a fresh pound of bacon in my fridge.

Grabbing the bacon, i tossed onto the pan and lit up the burner to my stove excited at the concept ill be having bacon this morning.

Now, for those of you who are unaware of the male systematic code - normally (at least those of us under 35) we wake up with a boner. At least i do. If that makes me a freak then JesusTitties is a freak.

So, as i was cooking bacon at full mast - i reached over the stove to grab some salt to throw in the pan.

Because I am a large guy, the stove was precisely at mid waist level, and as i reached the tip of my dink pressed against the hot coil on my stove, which had been burning for a good 3 minutes at the time.

As i jumped back, i could immediately smell the burnt flesh in the air. I ran to the washroom and stuck my dink in the sink, with one leg up on the toilet, the other straddeled over the sink, flushing it with water.

It was too late.
It was bleeding, and i could still smell the burnt flesh in the apartment. I decided to put a cream on it and go to the hospital, where i was treated with 3rd degree burns.

For 2 weeks i could not wear boxers, anything confining and basically had to take a leave of work. As well, report to my seniority with regard to my injury.

By the time i return to work - everyone knew and my desk was cluttered with pictures and hype regarding my burnt dink.

The moral of the story?
Burning your weener hurts more than anything you could ever imagine.

malina · 07-27-2003, 12:08 AM

07-27-2003, 12:20 AM

I'm laughing but I feel really sorry for it. By it I mean your dink.

07-27-2003, 01:26 AM

rmr · 07-27-2003, 01:27 AM

hahahahahahahaha

hahahahahahahaha

hahahahahahahahah

hahahahahahahahaha

where is agent smith??? hahahahahahahaha?

I want her to post "that" picture right now

hahahahahahahaha

priceyfatprude · 07-27-2003, 03:08 PM

I am sorry to hear about your dink, JT, but that *was* a good story.

Thank you to Zen for the suggestion.

Gareon · 07-27-2003, 09:07 PM

Is the dink ok now?

AllegroNg · 07-27-2003, 09:22 PM

Yeah! Are there battle wounds? Please say yes.

JesusTitties · 07-27-2003, 10:36 PM

There is no scar to the naked eye - no pun intended.

However under the correct lighting, you can definately see the redness of where it once was.

Gareon · 07-28-2003, 01:04 AM

what sort of lighting would that be?

JesusTitties · 07-28-2003, 02:33 AM

bright. sometimes flourecent.

Frieda · 07-28-2003, 03:43 AM

jesusdink

zenbabe · 07-28-2003, 10:45 AM

I love that story

Frieda · 07-28-2003, 11:20 AM

hehe

it's a good story, absolutely!

agentsmith · 07-28-2003, 03:27 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by rmr
hahahahahahahaha

hahahahahahahaha

hahahahahahahahah

hahahahahahahahaha

where is agent smith??? hahahahahahahaha?

I want her to post "that" picture right now

hahahahahahahaha

im here, as always.

that one?are you sure?

07-26-2003, 11:57 PM	#1
JesusTitties ¤¤¤¤¤¤¤ Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 3,124	How I Burned my Dink By JesusTitties One morning, i woke up on my day off - and because i had my own flat, i had the privacy to walk around, sleep and do anything i want in the nude. As i normally did. What was there to have for breakfast? I wondered.. and yes, i secretly pumped my fist as i noticed a fresh pound of bacon in my fridge. Grabbing the bacon, i tossed onto the pan and lit up the burner to my stove excited at the concept ill be having bacon this morning. Now, for those of you who are unaware of the male systematic code - normally (at least those of us under 35) we wake up with a boner. At least i do. If that makes me a freak then JesusTitties is a freak. So, as i was cooking bacon at full mast - i reached over the stove to grab some salt to throw in the pan. Because I am a large guy, the stove was precisely at mid waist level, and as i reached the tip of my dink pressed against the hot coil on my stove, which had been burning for a good 3 minutes at the time. As i jumped back, i could immediately smell the burnt flesh in the air. I ran to the washroom and stuck my dink in the sink, with one leg up on the toilet, the other straddeled over the sink, flushing it with water. It was too late. It was bleeding, and i could still smell the burnt flesh in the apartment. I decided to put a cream on it and go to the hospital, where i was treated with 3rd degree burns. For 2 weeks i could not wear boxers, anything confining and basically had to take a leave of work. As well, report to my seniority with regard to my injury. By the time i return to work - everyone knew and my desk was cluttered with pictures and hype regarding my burnt dink. The moral of the story? Burning your weener hurts more than anything you could ever imagine.

07-27-2003, 01:26 AM	#4
fodder Posts: n/a	ouch

07-27-2003, 03:08 PM	#6
priceyfatprude girthy pickles Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: under your desk Posts: 9,313	I am sorry to hear about your dink, JT, but that was a good story. Thank you to Zen for the suggestion. __________________ "We like your board's features...but don't care about it's people"

07-28-2003, 03:43 AM	#12
Frieda in limbo Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 19,504	jesusdink __________________ zoek waar je wil, maar het zit in jezelf oh yeah

07-28-2003, 10:45 AM	#13
zenbabe Lollypop! Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: we are all made of stars Posts: 11,690	I love that story __________________ Be yourself, because the people that mind don't matter, and the people that matter don't mind. -Dr. Seuss

07-27-2003, 12:08 AM	#2
malina leaving Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: up on the hill Posts: 6,013

07-27-2003, 12:20 AM	#3
imdrsmooth Posts: n/a	I'm laughing but I feel really sorry for it. By it I mean your dink.

07-27-2003, 01:27 AM	#5
rmr Moderator Join Date: Sep 2002 Posts: 10,595	hahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahah hahahahahahahahaha where is agent smith??? hahahahahahahaha? I want her to post "that" picture right now hahahahahahahaha

07-27-2003, 09:07 PM	#7
Gareon monkey Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Philippines Posts: 68	Is the dink ok now?

07-27-2003, 09:22 PM	#8
AllegroNg What I Am Wearing. Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Near DC Posts: 2,573	Yeah! Are there battle wounds? Please say yes.

07-27-2003, 10:36 PM	#9
JesusTitties ¤¤¤¤¤¤¤ Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 3,124	There is no scar to the naked eye - no pun intended. However under the correct lighting, you can definately see the redness of where it once was.

07-28-2003, 01:04 AM	#10
Gareon monkey Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Philippines Posts: 68	what sort of lighting would that be?

07-28-2003, 02:33 AM	#11
JesusTitties ¤¤¤¤¤¤¤ Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 3,124	bright. sometimes flourecent.

07-28-2003, 11:20 AM	#14
Frieda in limbo Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 19,504	hehe it's a good story, absolutely! __________________ zoek waar je wil, maar het zit in jezelf oh yeah

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