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Old 07-31-2003, 11:50 PM   #316
priceyfatprude
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Dear Ben Affleck,

You won your Oscar for writing, darling. Get back to it.

Love,

me
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Old 08-07-2003, 11:49 AM   #317
priceyfatprude
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Angry

Dear Maybelline:

What the hell are you putting in your pressed powder that gives me a zit 3 hours after application?

Hatefully Yours,

me
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Old 08-07-2003, 12:25 PM   #318
dinzdale
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Dear Ms Pricey-Fatprude

You seem to have picked up a jar of our new "teenage acne" developer for the pre-teens to appear older. The zits will disappear with puberty.

Rgds
May Belleen. (Mrs)
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Old 08-07-2003, 01:21 PM   #319
Frieda
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dear bottom lock on my door,

please please open tonight. i want to get into my house!

thank you!

frieda
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Old 08-31-2003, 04:39 PM   #320
Hermione
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dear world,

why must there be an eight hour time difference from CA to London?

regretfully yours,
surbs
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Old 08-31-2003, 08:06 PM   #321
AllegroNg
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Dear guy in SUV,
Sorry I cut you off. I'm glad you have breaks.



Dear customers,
Please stop asking soo many questions and sign the damned thing.


Dear kid,
The clarinet is *not* a baseball bat.
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Old 08-31-2003, 10:56 PM   #322
priceyfatprude
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Dear Self,

Stop eating potatoes. You know damn well they give you a big bad tummyache.

Dear FOX,

I hope you haven't cancelled Oliver Beene. If so, I will be angry. And you wouldn't like me when I'm angry.
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Old 09-01-2003, 02:55 PM   #323
Hermione
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dear arm,

I hate you.. ever since you contracted that rash and became itchy you have given me nothing but grief. now you have scars from that stupid rash. I hate you, die. no okay.. i'm sorry.. i didn't mean that..

very truly yours, surbs
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Old 09-01-2003, 03:00 PM   #324
Frieda
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dear ribs,

heal, dammit!

love,
frieda
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Old 09-01-2003, 05:46 PM   #325
priceyfatprude
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Dear Amazon.com,

You are cordially invited to LICK ME WHERE I PEE. I think $500 in my acct is more than enough to cover my $80 order. Don't think I don't realize you just f*cked me over on shipping charges & also don't think I'm NOT going to call you & scream tomorrow when your customer service department is open.
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Old 09-01-2003, 06:47 PM   #326
Frieda
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dear ribs,

please at least don't hurt so bad if i read funny things and laugh out loud:

Quote:
Originally posted by priceyfatprude
Dear Amazon.com,

You are cordially invited to LICK ME WHERE I PEE. I think $500 in my acct is more than enough to cover my $80 order. Don't think I don't realize you just f*cked me over on shipping charges & also don't think I'm NOT going to call you & scream tomorrow when your customer service department is open.
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Old 09-10-2003, 09:12 PM   #327
AllegroNg
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Dearest ants,
Sorry I had to vacuum y'all. You'll go to a better (darker) place now.
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Old 09-10-2003, 10:08 PM   #328
Hermione
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Dear A/P Government/Politics class,

Why must you be so hard? Your tests are impossible. I hate you. Only 173 days of school left.

Love always me
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Old 09-10-2003, 10:50 PM   #329
malina
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dear world,

i love you

a.
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Old 09-10-2003, 11:12 PM   #330
rapscalious rob
 
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Dear dad:

There is no need for you to talk so loud on the phone. I can hear your voice from the reciever five feet away. Just try to relax. I love you.

Love,
Me.


Dear dishes:

Why are you always dirty? Why do I spend my weekend evenings washing you? Try practicing good hygiene, dammit, Im uking sick of it!

Sincerely,
Your best friend and worst enemy.

Dear 209.126.178.53:

Thanks for giving me a place to virtually hang out with these cool, funny people.

Yours,
Rapscalious Rob the llama pirate.
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