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Old 10-22-2011, 02:21 AM   #3076
funkytuba
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Hello my name is Joe. I have a wife and 3 kids and I work at the button factory. One day, my boss came in and said "Joe, Are you busy?"

It was initially unpleasant, but it sure got that nasty smoke flavor out of my mouth.
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Old 09-26-2012, 05:10 AM   #3077
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How'd that new gargling tabasco work out?

Just a tingle every now and then.
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Old 09-26-2012, 09:54 AM   #3078
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Do you have any memories of surviving execution by electric chair?

The most important thing is to keep coming back to it.
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Old 09-26-2012, 02:19 PM   #3079
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How goes that elephant statue you're chipping out of that block of granite?

Just habit, really.
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Old 09-27-2012, 08:13 AM   #3080
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Why do you always wear a black and white wimple?

I bought the rug to cover it.
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Old 09-28-2012, 03:37 PM   #3081
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When you picked out your couch, did the Furniture Club have a two-item minimum?

Appalachian Summer, Winter and Fall
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Old 09-29-2012, 09:08 PM   #3082
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How do you cope when its all uphill until spring?

I'd take the beach house.
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Old 09-30-2012, 10:58 AM   #3083
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If you were going to the beach, what would you take?


Polka dots!
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Old 09-30-2012, 12:08 PM   #3084
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When you hit Karl Lagerfeld, what does he see instead of stars?

Chicken train.
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Old 10-04-2012, 04:31 PM   #3085
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Well, I guess I see your point that your new humane, organic poultry farm is really going above and beyond the usual "free range", but how do you get them all the way across Europe twice a year?


Hot as the hinges on the gates of hell.
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Old 10-20-2012, 07:18 AM   #3086
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Hey perla, how do you look in a bikini?


People can't get enough of it!
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Old 10-22-2012, 10:16 PM   #3087
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Seriously... you sell people a box, and inside it is nothing?

He just came back from Connecticut. And all is now merriness and light.
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Old 10-23-2012, 03:57 PM   #3088
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Whatever happened to that buddy of yours who felt unfulfilled because he had never seen a collection of Timex watches and an Easter Island replica all in one place?



Nasal steroids and a fluffernutter sandwich.
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Old 10-23-2012, 09:08 PM   #3089
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What do they call a good night out in Austin, Texas?

99% perspiration, 1% inspiration.
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Old 10-24-2012, 02:05 PM   #3090
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Did you write your last limerick in the sauna?

My volleyball. It's slightly flat.
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