12 REASONS WHY HOMOSEXUALS SHOULDN'T MARRY

[Willow Sylph]

1. Homosexuality is not natural, much like eyeglasses, polyester, and birth control.

2. Heterosexual marriages are valid because they produce children. Infertile couples and old people can`t legally get married because the world needs more children.

3. Obviously, gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

4. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if Gay marriage is allowed, since Britney Spears` 55-hour just-for-fun marriage was meaningful.

5. Heterosexual marriage has been around a long time and hasn`t changed at all; women are property, blacks can`t marry whites, and divorce is illegal.

6. Gay marriage should be decided by people, not the courts, because the majority-elected legislatures, not courts, have historically protected the rights of the minorities.

7. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That`s why we have only one religion in America.

8. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

9. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

10. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That`s why single parents are forbidden to raise children.

11. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society. Heterosexual marriage has been around for a long time, and we could never adapt to new social norms because we haven`t adapted to things like cars or longer life spans.

12. Civil unions, providing most of the same benefits as marriage with a different name are better, because a "separate but equal" institution is always constitutional. Separate schools for African-Americans worked just as well as separate marriages for gays and lesbians will.

Those are great! Where did you get that?

[Willow Sylph]

A friend of mine passed it on to me. When I first saw the title, I was p*ssed until I started reading it.

[Spicy Jack]

It is a cute play on ideas, but this list is comparing apples and oranges. It is a play on logic. Basically you can use the same kind of argument to prove just the opposite or just about anything for that matter.

[Willow Sylph]

I think it makes some valid points, though.

[Spicy Jack]

It would be like saying:

If it's 1:00 p.m., then it's after noon.
It's not 1:00 p.m. So, it's not after noon.

Good point.

I keep forgetting this is a debate hall

[Willow Sylph]

Spice - I'll agree with you on some of the points, but not all of them. Some of them make perfectly logical sense. Either way, ALL of them make AT LEAST as much sense as some people's arguement as to why gays shouldn't be able to get married.

[zenbabe]

why couldn't I have been Britney Spears!!!!!

[priceyfatprude]

LOVED IT.

[joppa.gal]

People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

I've heard that argument a lot. Although a bit toned down more, since I come from a right wing Christian background.

Seems to me that marriage really isn't that sacred any more heterosexually as a society. It seems to be now more on a case by case basis that people take relationships seriously or not so much.

It was simpler times when "the ruler" was the Bible and people judged by absolute black and white standards. Now that America is all-inclusive, who is to say that one man's way is correct and another is wrong?

*My* people mean well when they try to take things back to times when the *ruler* was only two-dimensional, but we've gone into the third, fourth, and sixth dimension here.

There is no way to turn back the hands of time. Someone has a sig that says a mind cannot return to the same dimensions once it has been stretched beyond it's limits.

I fully agree.

[Hyakujo's Fox]

Originally posted by Spicy Jack
It is a cute play on ideas, but this list is comparing apples and oranges. It is a play on logic. Basically you can use the same kind of argument to prove just the opposite or just about anything for that matter.

Originally posted by Willow Sylph
I think it makes some valid points, though.

ummm, I believe it's meant to be a parody throughout.

[wearentproperty]

dear mr. stupid idiot.
i would like you to know that women aren't property and if you think that you are again, a complete moron.
and shouldn't be allowed on a computer or to have a life because you are just that stupid.
HAVE A NICE DAY :]

[Jack Flanders]

Originally Posted by zenbabe

why couldn't I have been Britney Spears!!!!!

and then you could be married to Kevin F.!!!!