interview horror stories

[sparticle]

I was just starting out as a single parent of an infant son (who is now 21 and doing very well, heh).

I am sure that the babysitter had no damn use for my briefcase. I was served equally poorly by having carried a diaper bag into the interview. Needless to say, neither the babysitter nor I had what we needed, though the interview went so rapidly to crap that perhaps I had the appropriate kit for the job after all.

God above. It embarrasses me yet.

[Smartypants]

Originally Posted by zenbabe

So being ready to celebrate, I emailed my girlfriend "YAY, I passed my drug test!! We can have some scoopy snacks tonight!!!"

Somehow, I had inadvertantly sent it as a reply to the guy that had just hired me.

That is TOO funny!! HAHAHAHAHA!!

[zenbabe]

I meant to say "Scooby Snacks" but yeah, that one usually gets a chuckle..

[auntie aubrey]

the diaper bag story made me laugh out loud. or "lol" as the kiddies like to say.

Originally Posted by auntie aubrey

i just had the toughest job interview i've ever faced. half the time i wasn't sure whether i just sounded like i was talking out of my ass, or whether i actually was talking out of my ass. so of course as my mouth is moving and i'm saying completely inane things, somewhere in the back of my head i'm double-thinking, "what am i saying? am i nuts? can she tell i have no idea what's going on?"

i am happy to note that i didn't bomb as badly as i thought. they offered me the job today. excuse me while i dance.

[Brynn]

[madasacutsnake]

GJ Aubrey.

[jodee]

I had an interview one time in downtown Chicago. At that time I was living in Missouri and working in a company that didn't really have a dress code, so my closet didn't have much dress apparel. Since it was a last minute interview, I grabed my black cotton dress pants and a nice sweater out of the closet. Then added a pair of black socks and my dress shoes.

I drove to my husband (boyfriends house at the time) who lived in Illinois. I woke up early that morning and put on the clothes that I had brought. To my horror, my pants were way to short, and the legs had gotten tighter. When I would set down or walk, the legs would ride up above my socks! But since I was already running late I had to make due with what I had, and prayed that I had time to pull down my pant legs before the person interviewd me got to see me.

I rode the train to downtown Chicago, and walked the rest of my way to the interview. I felt so stupid walking down the middle of Chicago with my pant legs above my socks. By the time I got to the building I was already irritated and in no mood for an interview. Once I got there and told the lady at the desk who I was she had me stand in a group with some other people. All of us started talking and fiqured out we had an interview at the same time.

It was the strangest interview I had ever seen. I had an interview with approx. 15 other people, but we weren't trying for the same job. When all was said and done, I didn't even know what company I would be working for if I got hired or even where the company was at. The next day I got a phone call that said that I could come back for a second interview. But after these people wasting my time and not even telling me where or what I was interviewing for I declined and went back to my old job for a while longer.

[auntie aubrey]

that sounds like one of those "outside sales" scams. did they try to earn your trust with promises that you could "earn as much as you want"?

[l'azizza]

I had an interview today that, if I got/get the job 1) with some negotiation would pay me more that I've ever made, 2) would cause me to relocate to the big city (oh big city I've missed you), thus 3) altering my life/ course.

The guy interviewing me was very nice, sociable, and it wasn't one of those "I'm going to ask you a question now which will show me the content of your soul" interviews. I was so nervous and sweaty just the same.

I did okay, just okay. But upon retrospect....

There was the "do you have any questions" time, in which I asked why there were positions open. Knowing very little about all things, I do know that this is the best question to ask, because you can find out if employees have just dropped and quit (hating their job and seeing no other way out), etc. He said that one employee had gotten a masters degree in psychology and moved on, another was transferred to a better position, leaving her position open, in which a temp was working.

He took me on a tour of the place, which is a growing business, upstarted in 1990 with seven employees, now has 110. From start to finish, all rx orders are done in that building. I used the word "cool" at least once and "neat" more than that. To my recollection I didn't say fvcking or fvckin'.

He showed me, which I was excited to see, a "robotic arm." A huge machine/ computer that fills rx orders with over 350 common meds, labels them, knows when it's made a mistake. I looked into the machine at the cells where the meds are held, there was a bottle and some tablets on the floor. Being the funny twit I am, I said, "wow he really made a mess in here." Referring of course to the machine, anthropomorphizing the machine.

(I'm one of those, I'm sure that most don't do this, who assumes someone is in my brain and knows wtf I'm talking about if I don't fully articulate it. I DO NOT VERBALLY COMMUNICATE WELL. Written words are a little better because I have time to re- read, take from another's perspective, re- write, read again..)

My interviewer, bless his heart, says, "Yeah he does that all the time."

Later we have circumvented the place, I'm at the robotic arm again. The interviewer is explaining how the machine is filled, drugs that come in 2000 pills a bottle or preferred over opening 20 100 capsule bottles. The guy filling it is wearing headphones. The capsules somehow make their way into the cells. My G-d I hope he is only a temp.

Upon introspect, hours later, the only way I see how there would be a bottle on the floor is if the temp dropped it and left it or the robotic arm had the shakes.

Did I just insult this guy- temp (that's the way to start, eh?) and the interviewer took it gracefully?

So newbies, please make me feel better and post your horror stories here.

[trisherina]

I think you are worrying too much. Showing you around the place thoroughly is a pretty good sign that they plan to offer the job. Your comment was likely taken as intended.

Edited to add: your worry is of the charming kind, though, just in case I sound cranky.

[priceyfatprude]

Trish is right, you are overthinking it. Break a leg!

[l'azizza]

Thanks for the perspective, you two.

Didn't seem cranky to me T, but if you were I would take it in stride.

Talked to my sister today and she said I should have taken a Xanax. I had forgotten about the Zannies!

I think they give tours to everyone. Would it be too much to send a thank you card? If I sent it tomorrow, it would be received before the hiring decision. I did like the place.

[brightpearl]

I have a quitting a job horror story. It's followed by a job interview miracle, which I hope will provide some comic relief.

In college, I did photo developing and retouching for a wedding photographer who, as my weeks there passed, turned out to be a terrible racist. I mean, really unbelievable. If someone called up and *sounded* black to him, he'd tell them he was booked. You have to be pretty effing racist to not take someone's money. So I used to book every person of color that came in the place. :-) Eventually, he called a client the "n" word in front of me, and I told him I was quitting.

The next interview I had, I was nervous about saying why I had left the last job, but I had to say something. I had only worked for him for 3 months, so an explanation was necessary. I decided to be honest on the application, and I said I had quit because the boss routinely made business decisions based on race. The interviewer was white. After several questions, she said she had to ask about my comments concerning leaving that job. I was nervous about it, because I couldn't read her expression, but I elaborated on the racial slurs a bit, and said that I just have a deep personal conviction that working for such a person was wrong. Then she told me that her husband was black, and that I was hired.



Sometimes the universe just hands it to you on a plate, you know? I'm hoping that for all of you that are searching for jobs at the moment.

[trisherina]

Originally Posted by l'azizza

I think they give tours to everyone. Would it be too much to send a thank you card? If I sent it tomorrow, it would be received before the hiring decision. I did like the place.

Small, brief, and upbeat -- not a bad idea -- I have responded favourably in the past to an email of similar flavour after an interview -- but I think they're going to hire you anyway, so only do it if you wish to impress upon them what a likeable employee you'll be.

[auntie aubrey]

i had an interview today for a job i don't want to commute to. actually i found out there's a train station a couple blocks from the building so it's not inconceivable but....... i still don't know. why do they have to be so far away?

but get this. i was really logey this morning because i stayed up late finishing my book and i was running late and i rushed the puppy outside to have a potty and rushed him back in to his crate and threw my jacket on and grabbed my portfolio and purse and dove into the car and headed downtown.

question: at what point did i realize that i was still wearing my dog-walking shoes?

answer: as i was entering the lobby of the building where the interview was located.

i was wearing all shades of brown. my purse is brown. my dog walking shoes are black slip-on sandals with visibly tattered, shredded lining. they don't even look like they fit properly.

so.

yeah.

that's what i wore to my interview.


yeah.