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Old 03-17-2005, 09:28 PM   #1
Marcus Bales
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The Dictionary Game

The "original" dictionary game goes like this:

Materials: pencils and paper for everyone; one dictionary.

Rules: The first player selects a word from the dictionary and writes the definition on a piece of paper, and marks it with his or her name. The word is then read to the group. Each player writes his or her definition on a piece of paper, and marks it with his or her name. The selector then arbitrarily numbers each definition and all the pieces of paper (including the real definition) are put in a container from which the selector of the word draws them one by one and reads them aloud, except for the names.

Play: Each player then writes down which definition he or she believes is the genuine dictionary definition, indicating by number, key word, or quotation. When all players (except the selector, who, of course, knows) has written down his or her selection of the genuine definition, the selector reveals the genuine definition.

Scoring: One point for each player who correctly identifies the genuine definition. One point for every vote that it was the genuine one goes to the creator of each definition that got a vote as the genuine definition.

Strategy: Ideally, one would oneself identify the genuine definition while having written a definition which gets everyone's vote but one's own.

The Online Version

Clearly, this game is not tansferable to cyberspace, not because anyone would cheat but because everyone would -– except philosophers, of course, who are above such sordid behavior, but thin on the ground no matter where you look. If they'd eat more, they would be neither so thin, nor unable to stand up, nor so few.

The basis of the game online, then, is to entertain ourselves by creating interesting definitions and reading others' interesting definitions of words which we are all perfectly free to look up so that we can appreciate each others' ingenuity in creating plausible or witty or funny or offensive or any other kind of definitions -- so long as they are wrong -- or mostly wrong, or at least wrong enough that we know you didn't just crib it from the dictionary.

The word-picker is obliged to judge the entries in as entertaining (and therefore often as whimsical and even capricious) a way as possible, and report on the result to the group, in the process reviewing the other entries in as entertaining way as possible, and then naming the unlucky winner. Winning is a mixed blessing since the winner becomes the new word-picker, and is then obliged to keep track of the new entries, and to judge them, with commentary, for the entertainment of all.

When a round of play is over is entirely up to the word-picker of that round, but the judges are implored to get on with it, and threatened by the prospect, if they let their round drag on, of having to judge multiple entries as the natives, always restless, start to mutter and post definitions disparaging the judge and questioning whether his or her family life is entirely on the up-and-up.

So if there is a rule it is to be entertaining and, if you have the brains god gave giraffes, to come in second -- or even last! If you should have the misfortune to actually win, you are obliged to immediately choose another word and start keeping track of the entries, or beg off AT ONCE so the former judge can wipe the smug smile off the face of that giggling second-place person by assigning the top spot to him or her.

If, in the judgment of the Judicial Board (that is, me) too much time has gone by between words, or in closing off entries for a particular word, the Board reserves the right to issue, capriciously and whimsically, an arbitrary and binding judgment and either issue a new word or choose a "winner" from the current entries, thus obligating someone else to do the work of judging.
So, to summarize,

The Non-Rules: Be entertaining and be quick or be quiet.

The Zatoichi Presumption: That if two entries are alike, the second one was invented just as honorably as the first.

The 12"Razormix Non-Rule: That if the winner of a round of play doesn't pick a new word pretty much right away, and can't be PM'd or emailed to prompt them to post a new word, the smug smile will be wiped off the face of the unlucky holder of the Coveted Second Place Award, and he or she will become the winner of the round.

The Multiple Entry Amendment: There is no Multiple Entry Amendment, except as individual judges decide, with rightful whimsicality or capriciousness, to create one for their own purposes. Fore-warned is fore-armed -- and fore-armed is what you get if you're a rookie in the NBA.

For adjudications and arbitrations of disputes about Non-Rules and Shady Practices, it's just barely possible that I might be persuaded to scrape my fingers off the cocoa-encrusted table and, raising my bleary, chocolate-reddened eyes to the screen, navigate to whichever file it is in which I've stored THE NON-RULES in order to issue a judgment -- attached to a provocative note which will shock your significant other and astonish your neighbors.

And the first word is: AMPHIBOLY

Marcus
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Last edited by Marcus Bales : 10-16-2009 at 12:00 AM.
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Old 03-17-2005, 10:44 PM   #2
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I love this game. I played it all the time during my SAT classes.
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Old 03-17-2005, 11:03 PM   #3
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I love this game too! Great idea! I will start:

AMPHIBOLY -- From Amphi, meaning dual, and Bolus, meaning a soft mass of chewed food, amphiboly is the early stage of rumination in cows and other cud-chewing animals when the liquids and solids have yet to coalesce into a cohesive mass.
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Old 03-17-2005, 11:04 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by surbhi
I love this game. I played it all the time during my SAT classes.
And, um, did this help or hinder your final SAT scores?
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Old 03-17-2005, 11:23 PM   #5
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AMPHIBOLY (n) - the practice of, or desire for, sexual intercourse in breaking waves. Named after a Roman goddess associated with bays and rockpools.
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Old 03-18-2005, 12:01 AM   #6
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AMPHIBOLY (n) - the practice of drinking sparkling white wine from art nouveau or arts and crafts/mission style vases - from the greek, amphora, and the french, bollinger.
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Old 03-18-2005, 04:19 AM   #7
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AMPHIBOLY (n) - the practice in which a frog (amphibian), becomes very intelligent at the old pastime game of boly.
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Old 03-18-2005, 05:00 AM   #8
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amphiboly (n) - The realization that one is able to safely engage in activities both in and out of the water, usually reached developmentally by about the age of four.
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Old 03-18-2005, 05:00 AM   #9
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Last edited by trisherina : 03-18-2005 at 05:03 AM. Reason: deleted duplicate post
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Old 03-18-2005, 05:05 AM   #10
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amphiboly -- The practice, in some ancient Middle Eastern cultures, of delivering a child under water, then requiring it to swim to land in order to live. Such cultures usually died out after two generations, causing a subsequent modification of the practice in the form of full-body immersion at a later stage in life. [See baptism.]
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Old 03-18-2005, 11:01 AM   #11
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amphiboly - a state of arousal in young south asian women brought about by dancing to bhangra music on saturday afternoons. inordinate lengths are taken to hide this state from parents while flaunting it to potential suitors.
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Old 03-19-2005, 05:39 AM   #12
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amphiboly - the act of raising your voice when getting a strike in bowling
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Old 03-19-2005, 06:24 AM   #13
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FVCK!
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Old 03-19-2005, 01:18 PM   #14
Marcus Bales
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The Boring Actual Definition -- Amphiboly: a grammatical structure that allows for two different understandings. For example, in Abbott and Costello’s “Who’s on First” routine the humor is built almost entirely on amphiboly as Abbott’s explanations that “Who’s on first”, meaning a player named “Who” is playing first base, are misinterpreted by Costello as “Who’s on first”, meaning a question about the name of the player who is playing first base. It’s funnier when they do it.

MR.Smartypants
AMPHIBOLY -- From Amphi, meaning dual, and Bolus, meaning a soft mass of chewed food, amphiboly is the early stage of rumination in cows and other cud-chewing animals when the liquids and solids have yet to coalesce into a cohesive mass.

The Ew! Award -- Too much information about something we didn’t want to know anything at all about.

madasacutsnake
AMPHIBOLY (n) - the practice of drinking sparkling white wine from art nouveau or arts and crafts/mission style vases - from the greek, amphora, and the french, bollinger.

The Alcoholic Haze Award -- There are no nouveau, arts-and-crafts, or mission-style amphorae; all those guys made the far more practical 16.9 oz vessel decorated with naked Polynesians: the Bali-Bolli glass.

Malmal11787
AMPHIBOLY (n) - the practice in which a frog (amphibian), becomes very intelligent at the old pastime game of boly.

The Bah! Award -- Everyone knows that frogs are born playing boly, and it doesn’t take any effort at all to get good at it.

trisherina
AMPHIBOLY -- (n) - The realization that one is able to safely engage in activities both in and out of the water, usually reached developmentally by about the age of four.

The Judges Don’t Get It Award -- There seems to be something significant about this definition, but no points for jokes that whoosh over the judges’ heads.

craig johnston
AMPHIBOLY -- a state of arousal in young south asian women brought about by dancing to bhangra music on saturday afternoons. inordinate lengths are taken to hide this state from parents while flaunting it to potential suitors.

The Almost Sex Comes In Almost Second Award -- It would have won had there been a joke about Boliwood in there along with south asia, so you lucked out, there, Craig.

funkytuba
AMPHIBOLY -- the act of raising your voice when getting a strike in bowling
zenbabe
AMPHIBOLY -- FVCK!

The Joint Entry Award is jointly awarded to Funky and Zen, for his definition and her example.

Hyakujo's Fox
AMPHIBOLY (n) - the practice of, or desire for, sexual intercourse in breaking waves. Named after a Roman goddess associated with bays and rockpools.

The Coveted Second Place Award -- As usual, sex sells, and the judges bought it this time, too. Woo hoo!

Ms Robbie
AMPHIBOLY -- The practice, in some ancient Middle Eastern cultures, of delivering a child under water, then requiring it to swim to land in order to live. Such cultures usually died out after two generations, causing a subsequent modification of the practice in the form of full-body immersion at a later stage in life. [See baptism.]

The Winner! The judges actually believed this was right for a moment, until wiser heads prevailed and the orgy began.

Take it away, Robbie!
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Last edited by Marcus Bales : 03-19-2005 at 01:20 PM.
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Old 03-19-2005, 04:34 PM   #15
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Heh, I would have picked that one, too; it was great! Go, Ms Robbie!
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