post things you overhear in the office

my coworkers are all quiet right now

[Spicy Jack]

just fans and frigerators over here.

there are cigarette machines everywhere in germany

[Willow Sylph]

just my co-worker flirting over the phone with her married boyfriend.

[lvlycwgirl]

Two of my co-workers were seen "servicing" each other in a bathroom bar. That's been the topic of conversation in our fish bowl for a while now. ** YUCK **

i forget we have a chimney

[funkytuba]

only the relentless and frenetic typing of the girl from marketing..

tpatpaptittytiatpaptptatpaitpaipataiapattptttptpai tiaptiapipatattap.

*pause*

tipptippitytitititppttpiatiaitpiptpiatpitapitpaitp aiititapitapiatiatpiaatiapt.

*pause*

taptaptaptitpptpittpititptitpitatatiptipiaptiapipa tipaitpaita

*pause*

[dinzdale]

Someone from marketing doing something other than slithering on their belly to another free lunch?

I dont think so.

[noxxville]

For this conversation:

MJA = Marketing JackAss
ME = Me

MJA = "I know it doesn't work, but how are we showing it in the demo?"
ME = "We're not."
MJA = "But we need to be able to show it"
ME = "But it doesn't work"
MJA = "I know it doesn't work, but how are we showing it in the demo?"

repeat until you bounce your head off of a brick wall

[dinzdale]

Ha! We just sent this little gem .....

Dress Code for Men

Suit, impeccably pressed long sleeve button-down dress shirt and conservative silk tie for Formal
Conservative sports coat (no plaids or wild patterns - preferable a dark color), nice pressed long sleeve button-down dress shirt with an optional tie, good quality trousers (nicely pressed) or dress slacks/trousers (nicely pressed) for Semi-formal
Shirt (long sleeve button-down) without a tie and khakis for Casual (no denim, shorts, T-shirts, golf-shirts, or blue jeans)
Your belt should match your shoes
Few things dignify a man as much as polished dress shoes. Dirty shoes can throw off your seemingly polished appearance.
Tie your necktie in a good, solid knot, such as a Windsor or double Windsor. The four-in-hand- is plain and unimpressive. For reference www.tie-a-tie.net gives detailed instructions on how to tie a tie.
Facial hair properly groomed and trimmed.

Dress Code for Women

Skirted or Pant Suit
Blazer with Blouse and Skirt
Skirt length should be a little below the knee and never shorter than above the knee
Clean and polished conservative dress shoes (low heel best)
Make-up should be minimal with lipstick and nail polish conservative tones
Hose should be flawless (no runs) and conservative in color

Grooming for Everyone

Clean and polished conservative dress shoes
Well-groomed hairstyle (Men - hair should not extend below your shirt collar)
Cleaned and trimmed fingernails
Minimal cologne or perfume
No visible body piercing beyond conservative ear piercings for women
Well-brushed teeth and fresh breath (breath strips or spray will do the job)
No gum, candy, or other objects in your mouth
Minimal jewelry ( a watch and one ring)
No body odor

do they send you home if you get a run in your hose?

[Aphrodite]

Alright Dinz, So tattoos are good to go!!!!

Woo hoo there's individuality for you.

I'd spend my time trying to figure out ways to get around rules like those.

I know, a big waste of time.

[dinzdale]

That's what we've been trying to do Afro...

I mean, "no body odour" for fvck's sake....where will it end.

[Aphrodite]

So the non permanent tattoos. wrists and necks. Maybe have a brave sole do the 'Chakotay' tattoo from Voyageur. Or wear religious or ceremonial body art, you cannot be faulted for that.

Hair colour isn't defined. Kool-aid red, green, blue.

have fun!!!

[dinzdale]

Fvck it....I'm rebelling.....not going to polish my shoes tomorrow,
see how they like them apples