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06-17-2004, 04:04 AM
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#1 |
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Join Date: Jul 2003
Posts: 3,124
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question
k im going to be serious for one brief second.
what is your advice, male or female, on dating someone who is to say - incredibly attractive. In other words, you both feel the same way about each other there is no question about that. However, your significant other is insanely hot. Everywhere you go people stare at them, whenever he/she is alone people hit on them.. they come home it seems day after day telling you about some wierdo who was talking to them at the mall or some wierd phonecall they got from someone they work with. It seems constant all the time. im just looking for opinion, not advice really - because the obvious advice would be "as long as he/she is coming home to you at night then it doesnt matter". my interest lays in how to emotionally deal with the issue. I mean you cant keep him/her in a basement all their life. But some days when you come home from a long day, its just the last thing you want to hear about. My opinion is - anyone who is lucky enough to date someone who is out of this world beautiful, should expect and anticipate these problems and either sink or swim, learn to deal with it or leave. |
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06-17-2004, 04:15 AM
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#2 |
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meretricious dilettante
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 11,068
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Take a moment to reflect every day. Say to yourself, "Holy (profane expletive here)! Am I lucky, or what?" Go around grinning.
The best possible relationship attitude, for any relationship you would like to last, is shaped thusly. Right thoughts follow right attitudes, and right actions follow right thoughts. Life'll be good.
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Because how we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives. -- Annie Dillard |
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06-17-2004, 04:17 AM
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#3 |
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Join Date: Jul 2003
Posts: 3,124
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do you feel it is out of line, for one to indicate that something bothers him/her...
as if to say "it really bothers me when you take the time to talk to random strangers, when you know what they are really after." its frustrating sometimes. |
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06-17-2004, 04:34 AM
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#4 |
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meretricious dilettante
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 11,068
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I don't think it's ever out of line to let someone know you have those kinds of worries, as long as you make it clear that they're largely based on your own (understandable) insecurities, and that you're not necessarily labeling her behaviour as "bad." It's just behaviour that's customary for her, but it tweaks your insecurities. You're not even asking her to be considerate of you per se, but it's not fair to expect you to feel uncomfortable and say nothing, either. What she chooses to do with your discomfort is up to her, as they say.
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Because how we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives. -- Annie Dillard |
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06-17-2004, 05:06 AM
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#5 |
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no more nice girl
Join Date: Jan 2004
Posts: 5,054
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Mate, you're a psycho. Get some counselling.
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He really shatters the myth of white supremacy once and for all. |
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06-17-2004, 05:44 AM
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#6 |
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Join Date: Jul 2003
Posts: 3,124
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now that wasnt very nice.
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06-17-2004, 06:18 AM
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#7 |
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no more nice girl
Join Date: Jan 2004
Posts: 5,054
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I'll try being nice if you try being smarter.
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He really shatters the myth of white supremacy once and for all. |
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06-17-2004, 06:50 AM
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#8 |
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It's just words I write
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Warsaw, Poland
Posts: 1,467
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Jesus!
If this girl likes you, she will not be waiting to be picked up by the next bugger with a smart pickup line. She will just like you. Nagging at her about her being nice to people in general, whatever their intentions are, will only show you lack in confidence in her and in yourself. Try to enjoy your time with her! |
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06-17-2004, 07:53 AM
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#9 | |
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monkey
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 2,608
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JT - I totally agree with Trisherina. If it bothers you that much, let her know...
Quote:
 When you're in love with a beautiful woman It's hard When you're in love with a beautiful woman You know it's hard Everybody wants her Everybody loves her Everybody wants to take your baby home When you're in love with a beautiful woman You watch your friends When you're in love with a beautiful woman It never ends You know that it's crazy You want to trust her Then somebody hangs up when you answer the phone When you're in love with a beautiful woman You go it alone Maybe it's just an ego problem Problem is, Iv'e been fooled before By fair weathered friends and faint hearted lovers And everytime it happens It just convinces me more When you're in love with a beautiful woman You watch her eyes When you're in love with a beautiful woman You look for lies Everybody tempts her Everybody tells her She's the most beautiful woman they know When you're in love with a beautiful woman You go it alone When you're in love with a beautiful woman You watch your friends When you're in love with a beautiful woman You watch her eyes When you're in love with a beautiful woman You keep looking for lies Okay, maybe not a great example....
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Knight 1: We are now no longer the Knights who say "Ni". Knight 2: NI! Other Knights: Shh.... Knight 1: We are now the Knights who say.... "Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-PTANG! Zoom-Boing! Z'nourrwringmm!" |
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06-17-2004, 10:57 AM
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#10 |
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monkey
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Angband
Posts: 411
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I have a friend with a similiar problem, his wife is super hot and an extremely nice out going personality. She is nice to everyone so she gets hit on a lot but she does not realize it. She just thinks they are being nice to her. I remember we were in a bar one night and my buddies wife is on the floor dancing while we were sitting at the table. She came up to us with a terrified look on her face and said "That girl just tried to kiss me" she really didn't realize that some stripper had been coming on to her all night while my buddy and I watched trying not to laugh to hard. Consider that a beautiful mate on your arm is seen as a status symbol and everyone wants one themselves, they will always try to take yours, you'll have to get used to it.
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The Dude abides. |
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06-17-2004, 11:08 AM
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#11 |
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Key Lime Pie rocks!!!
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Oh, yeah!
Posts: 7,695
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I am in no danger of ever getting in a situation like that nor putting someone else in that situation, so I have no opinion to offer.
Sorry. |
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06-17-2004, 11:14 AM
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#12 | |
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Posts: n/a
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Quote:
it would drive me insane if i perceived him as a seducer honestly, if the person got attention everyone he went and ignored it and acted surprised everytime it was called to his attention, i would be extremely skeptical of everything about him in that case, i would end up leaving the person pretty quickly, regardless of how much i liked him |
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06-17-2004, 12:50 PM
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#13 |
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Lollypop!
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: we are all made of stars
Posts: 11,690
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tell her she needs to ugly down....get fat and pick up smoking....
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Be yourself, because the people that mind don't matter, and the people that matter don't mind. -Dr. Seuss |
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06-17-2004, 01:07 PM
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#14 |
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________
Join Date: Sep 2002
Posts: 5,131
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about five years ago i was dating a girl who could have been a victoria's secret model. it was fantastic most of the time. once, though, we were out at a restaurant fairly late in the evening. as we got up to leave i heard a guy say too loudly, "what is she doing with a guy like that?" it sorta bummed me out. but, after a while, i realized it was a good question. i decided i must have something going for me to deserve her affection. certainly it wasn't my looks. so i satisfied my insecurities by reminding myself that what she was attracted to was more than skin deep... that and the thought that drunk guys in restaurants probably concluded i was hung like a stallion.
so... maybe you need to just be confident that you are walking around with something more attractive to her than the average random guy on the street. |
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06-17-2004, 01:25 PM
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#15 |
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meretricious dilettante
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 11,068
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Maybe just get business cards printed up that say, "I am in fact hung like a stallion, and I can breathe through my ears." Drop them on tables whenever things are looking sketchy out in public.
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Because how we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives. -- Annie Dillard |
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