The Baseball 12-Step Thread

[sparticle]

Hi, I'm Sparticle, and I'm powerless over First Place in the AL Central Division....

Sonsabitches. We were this close. And to get shelled by Terry F*cking Mulholland....


Okay, I'm done sharing. Others?

[masterofNone]

i'll check back in december for the 12 step football thread. till then... the skins are going all the way this year. dammit.

[bealeblues]

Hi, I'm Beale. My team currently has a commanding lead in the N.L. West, but I'm not fooled into thinking we won't piss it away at the last moment, courtesy of a juiced home run by barryjackass.

I used to have an addiction and delusions of grandeur, but i'm in recovery. I will not be fooled again.

[Avalon]

Hi, I don't know anything about baseball that I don't read here or see on CNN. My total information is this: Ken Griffey Jr. got hurt..again. And someone foretold this on a different thread, but I forget whether it was beale or dinz.

that's all I got.

[sparticle]

heh heh heh....I started cussing at Barry Bonds being shown on ESPN this weekend, just on general principle. Mr. Sparticle wants to know what BB-Head ever did to me. I told him, "He started out looking like Jimi Hendrix and ended up looking like Mr. T and you're telling me it's Wheaties?!?!?!?! He's a...." : profane rant that ran for fifteen minutes:

Well. He asked.

[sparticle]

Originally posted by masterofNone
i'll check back in december for the 12 step football thread. till then... the skins are going all the way this year. dammit.

heh heh heh -- I feel your pain -- I'm a Browns fan. LOL

I don't like football, but they're the home team, and anything that pisses off people from Pittsburgh is a hit in our town.

Powerless. Over. Sports. LOL

[bealeblues]

the day that bastard gets the record will mark the day i quit watching baseball. it will be dead to me. first ripken retires, and then bonds has the home run record? no thanks.

[sparticle]

Originally posted by Avalon
Hi, I don't know anything about baseball that I don't read here or see on CNN. My total information is this: Ken Griffey Jr. got hurt..again. And someone foretold this on a different thread, but I forget whether it was beale or dinz.

that's all I got.

Listen, in knowing nothing about baseball, you share the distinguished company of 98% of the umpires in both goddamn leagues. There's money in it, I'm tellin' ya. Go for it.

It may have been bealie, it may have been dinzie -- when it comes to baseball, we are Borg. You will be assimilated.

[Aphrodite]

I've played baseball a few times.

Once I received a lovely concussion and slept on the back of a motorcycle for a two hour bike ride. Then they tucked me into a nice snuggly bed and left me to sleep for the night. (dorks)

One other time this very large and masculine lady told everyone to hit the ball towards me. I was obviously not a good player.

Try to assimilate me. You'll find I'll screw up the hive.

[sparticle]

Originally posted by Aphrodite
I've played baseball a few times.

Once I received a lovely concussion and slept on the back of a motorcycle for a two hour bike ride. Then they tucked me into a nice snuggly bed and left me to sleep for the night. (dorks)

One other time this very large and masculine lady told everyone to hit the ball towards me. I was obviously not a good player.

Try to assimilate me. You'll find I'll screw up the hive.

If you can screw up this bunch any more than it is already screwed up, you are a goddamn Einstein and a natural for baseball and ought to be managing a major league team such as the Indians, who could f*ck up a one-car funeral.

What kid of EEEDIOTS would put someone who had suffered a head injury to BED? Thank God you are all-righty, Aphrodite! Good grief!

[Aphrodite]

Which team would you want them to assign me to?

I would make a great....What is the opposite of a 'ringer'? I would be more like a mole.

Oh and the ex husband was the stupid dork who thought I should sleep off the concussion. He didn't even wait for me to stop vomiting. I must say though, that when I awoke in the field after the crack in the head, the world was the most brilliant colours I had ever seen. They were kind enough to let me wander into the lake to cool off when I got the sweats.

[sparticle]

Ya know -- why do you think they call 'em "Ex"? Tch, tch tch. What a moron. Glad he's no longer in the picture. Sheesh.

Go manage the Yankees. Pitch for 'em too if you can manage it. We'll start a fundraiser to pay your salary.

[Aphrodite]

[Spicy Jack]

The only thing I enjoy about baseball is the all you can eat nachos and beer. Plop me down and come back for me when the game is over.

[malarkey]

what's your favorite team? I like the Yankees.