Family reunion!

[melissa]

Monkeys! I'm back from California and jeez! It was crazy. I'm going to post an email that I sent out to friends because I don't want to type it all again! It's pretty long, but good reading, I think!


First off: it was really great to see my dad and we got along and I really like him. He's not a bad guy, he just doesn't know how to be a Father. Seeing grandma was weird just because she is so distant. I'm not used to people displaying so little emotion.

My aunt Nancy was happy to see me, her husband Roman didn't recognize me. Everyone said that I've gotten so much taller!! I think I stopped growing in high school, but whatever. Nancy and Roman's daughter is 36 and is a lesbian and came to dinner with her partner and their 1-year old twin girls. I was happy they were there, I felt like I had some allies. Their girls are very well behaved and pretty cute and Nancy takes pictures of them every 45 seconds! She's a little obsessive of her grandchildren and her cameras and other high-tech gizmos that she buys.

My brother Jim is in jail for multiple DUIs, but his wife (they're still married, but not together anymore) came with their two kids and her boyfriend (who seems like a good guy). Their son is 17 and their daughter is 13 and they seem pretty well behaved and polite.

My dad's younger brother Jeff showed up with his "old lady" Michelle. These were two of the scariest people I've ever had to interact with. Jeff looks like an unkept mountain man who hasn't bathed in months. Michelle doesn't talk, she yells. Apparently Jeff gets drunk and hits her and knocks her teeth out. She has different personal boundaries than I do and she also has the unfortunate habit of spraying a constant spray of spit as she talks. I spent the dinner with an invisible wall between me and Jeff and Michelle so I wouldn't see the food fall out of their mouths as they talked non-stop. Jeff has a son, Jay, who is a year younger than I am. Jay brought his wife and their 2 year old daughter (who is a devil child) and their 3 month old son, who never made a sound. The daughter was one of the worst behaved children I've ever been around. Everyone commented on how great it is that the baby is so quiet and all I could think about is: how healthy is that? Dad later told me that when Jay had gotten his wife pregnant (the first time) the cops brought him in for statutory rape. What is the age of consent in California? I sure don't know, but the judge told Jay that if he brought in signed permission from her parents and a marriage license he'd drop the charges. So Jay went to the girl's parents (who are heroin addicts) and came back with their permission and married her.

The next day Dad and I drove out to Palermo to see my oldest brother John. He is 37 and has been in and out of prison since he was 19. He's been out of prison since February of this year and it's the longest stretch of being out of prison since he started going in. He has a 19 year old girlfriend who he met in the welfare office who is slightly mentally retarded. Dad says that John likes to be with women who he can control and this girl sat by his side with a wide-eyed smile on her face and didn't do a thing without John's OK.

Dad took me shopping and we actually missed the crowds and we even had fun! He told me that he's really proud of me for graduating and that he's mad at himself for not helping me and I told him that being mad at himself doesn't do either of us any good. I hope that we are able to just move forward from this point and be adults and find friendship. I really enjoyed my time with him and I found him to be very honest and way more self-aware than I expected. It was really obvious to me that he really does care about me and that this trip meant so much to him.

Crazy people, huh? I seriously can't make any of this up and it's a good thing I didn't have any expectations because I wouldn't have been prepared for any of it. This trip has made me appreciate (once more) how happy I am that Niki and Virginia took me in when they did and I'm so grateful for all that I've experienced in my life and for all that I have: mostly my happiness and the fact that I know I'm responsible for myself. I am so grateful for the support system that I have and knowing that I have so many people who care about me and who really know me allows me to have adventures like this.