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Old 08-05-2005, 02:24 PM   #1
Con ate dog
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Frailty: an Alphabet Poem

One of the tragedies of my childhood was that I never had, or even read or heard of, The Ghastlycrumb Kids. It was an alphabet poem of rhyming couplets, each documenting how a child died. To paraphrase for example: "M is for Marge, smothered under a rug; N is for Norman, done in by a thug."

Grisly child deaths has been done, though, so let's find gentle (or damning, if you prefer) humour in verse: unflattering portraits of fictional adults, alphabetically, in rhyming couplets. 2 to a customer.


Alice felt ugly, so gave herself cheap,
Ben grew a beard 'cause he though it looked Deep
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Old 08-06-2005, 02:54 AM   #2
trisherina
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Alice felt ugly, so gave herself cheap,
Ben grew a beard 'cause he though it looked Deep

Charles had a terribly long and weak chin,
Diana barfed often so she could stay thin.
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Old 08-06-2005, 03:56 AM   #3
Smartypants
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Alice felt ugly, so gave herself cheap,
Ben grew a beard 'cause he though it looked Deep

Charles had a terribly long and weak chin,
Diana barfed often so she could stay thin.

Edgar told lies as a way to sound cool,
Fanny sold X to her pals after school.
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Old 08-06-2005, 04:10 AM   #4
madasacutsnake
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Alice felt ugly, so gave herself cheap,
Ben grew a beard 'cause he though it looked Deep

Charles had a terribly long and weak chin,
Diana barfed often so she could stay thin.

Edgar told lies as a way to sound cool,
Fanny sold X to her pals after school.

Graham like picking his nose with a stick
Helen used to eat it until she got sick
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Old 08-06-2005, 11:07 AM   #5
Con ate dog
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Location: Suzhou, China, city of canals
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Alice felt ugly, so gave herself cheap,
Ben grew a beard 'cause he though it looked Deep

Charles had a terribly long and weak chin,
Diana barfed often so she could stay thin.

Edgar told lies as a way to sound cool,
Fanny sold X to her pals after school.

Graham like picking his nose with a stick
Helen used to eat it until she got sick

Ingrid has only one subject: her Needs
Jim finds your scab and then picks till it bleeds
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Old 08-06-2005, 12:47 PM   #6
daverbee
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Alice felt ugly, so gave herself cheap,
Ben grew a beard 'cause he though it looked Deep

Charles had a terribly long and weak chin,
Diana barfed often so she could stay thin.

Edgar told lies as a way to sound cool,
Fanny sold X to her pals after school.

Graham like picking his nose with a stick
Helen used to eat it until she got sick

Ingrid has only one subject: her Needs
Jim finds your scab and then picks till it bleeds

Ken is so lazy he sleeps until noon
Len killed his wife, sent her corpse to the moon.
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