Fabuloso Friday 2/Are They Gone Yet
From zefrank
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15 SECONDS (give or take a few)
MEDIUM CLOSE
Ze: 1, one thousand 2, one thousand 3, one thousand 4, one thousand 5, one thousand 6, one thousand 7, one thousand 8, one thousand 9, one thousand 10, one thousand 11, one thousand 12, one thousand 13, one thousand 14, one thousand 15, one thousand.
MEDIUM [Secretly, from the side of the frame.]
Ze: Are The New Viewers Gone yet?
A moment for ze
in response to the increasing demand placed on ze that he be 'always on' and entertaining - a trend that I sense is taking it's toll on our favorite dancing monkey - I propose we give ze 15 seconds to relax. Just relax. crack a crispy stella. flip through a magazine. do it for ze.
- very nice, I love it. seems like the tyke has had a rough week.
- Great idea, take it easy, have some coffee... not to make a starbucks product placement, just to relax! --Gelbi 15:36, 15 June 2006 (PDT)
- This is the best idea yet. Especially since Ze has done so much to entertain us and let us relax (only recently with The Show, but with the rest of his site for yeeeears)
- I like the base concept behind this one, too. Unfortunately it doesn't make for great video. Here's a thought: give Ze 15 seconds to do anything he wants with a promise of no reprisals from the audience. No snarky comments, in fact we promise to never mention it ever, anywhere ... no matter what. (Of course we fail, but that can be entertainment and a mythology unto itself.) muyfabulosotalk 21:09, 15 June 2006 (PDT)
- Haha, very nice. This should be the first 15 seconds of the show, followed by
"Are the new viewers gone yet?"
- Absolutely! Don't forget to sip the starbucks.
- I'd like to add a new section for "are the new viewers gone yet?" as part of the 15 seconds.
(so I'm gonna copy moving this, but won't delete it from here. I'll leave that up to the original contributor).
- I suggest he sit stationary and junk blink a couple times. Sipping the drink should start just at the very end of the 15s so it's like "oh finally, something is happen-hey!"
Cooking with Ze
This segment would begin with Ze in the kitchen, beginning to make something basic, such as toast. Chef's attire would be good too.
Ze:To make the proper slice o' toast, you need bread.
CLOSEUP ON BREAD
Ze:And a toaster
CLOSEUP ON BLENDER
Ze: {angry at blender} hard-charging little...
CLOSEUP ON TOASTER
Ze: There we go, And you stick the bread, in the toaster
CLOSEUP ON THIS ACTION
Ze: And you wait...
Ze: One one thousand... two one... zero - are the new viewers gone yet? Good morning sports racers...
Falafel
Ze - walking down a street, holding in his right hand what appears to be a small brown ball.
The humble falafel is a dietary staple of the Middle East.
Ze brings the ball to his nose and sniffs it appreciatively.
Consisting of fried mashed chicpeas, also used to make homous, this delicious snack can be eaten alone or as a sandwich filling.
Ze pauses.
It is worth contemplating the falafel as it is a uniting food, one that translates well across the many divisive borders of this explosive region.
Ze looks at the falafel and nods for a few seconds.
Cut to manic Ze, Extreme Close Up. He is no longer outside. He whispers conspiratorally:
Are the new viewers gone yet?
No Sound!
Ze - Medium close up, looking directly at the camera and speaking like a newsreader.
Certain wild animals can produce sounds that are dangerous to the human ear.
The screen fades in on a black placard with white writing that says:
Please turn your sound all the way down to avoid damage to your equipment.
Cut to a new placard that says:
Please make sure there are no dogs in the room.
cut to Ze - long shot, holding his hand to one ear, appearing to listen carefully.
After a second, Ze nods and smiles to the camera.
The screen fades in on a black placard with white writing that says:
The End.
Hold for 1 second.
Cut to Ze, manic, extreme close up, whispering conspiratorally.
Are the new viewers gone yet?
Reward
I think Ze should wax a little philosophical and ask a question at the beginning of the show, (perhaps part of, "Are the New Viewers Gone Yet?") and not give the answer until the very end, so far at the end the screen actually goes black and just when you think it's really over he gives the answer quickly.
Ze: asks, "What are the rewards for patience?" smiles laughs, "We'll find out latter!" ...Show goes on....
At the very end: ze gives the answer quickly. Show over.
Sophistication
Ze, sitting in his library for fifteen seconds with a robe, a pipe (the kind that blows bubbles of course), a silver platter of assorted cheeses, an umbrella and a monacle. Oh yeah, it should be raining inside the room as well.. What else would the umbrella be for? "Are the new viewers gone yet?"
Subliminal messaging
[Normal Ze shot - like the normal "Welcome" shot]
For about 10 seconds, Ze should say something (like some sort of messages to the sportsracers out there, although this part is very flexible) BACKWARDS (Whether this be recording something then reversing it, or actually saying it backwards, either way works). He should then play it slowly and deep, sort of like a slow-motion movie shout (a la NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO) and add an echo.
[During this 10 seconds, the camera slowly zooms in on Ze until, at the 10 seconds, his eyeball is all that is in view]
During the last 5 seconds, still zoomed in on his eyeball, Ze says "Are the new viewers gone yet?" in a really slow, demonic voice (echo if desired)
Tour of Page
I would like ze to spend 15 to 30 seconds just talking to me. Really. He can give me a tour of the web page and what it has to offer. (draft)(points left) "Hello, and welcome to The Show. I hope you enjoy your stay. Look around... see there are the google ads, click those." (points right) “Over there are the meaningless products, buy some of those.” (points down) “If you look below, there are a bunch of comments which I often read on the show. Read those, if you dare!” (points left down)“This week there's a link to the earth sandwich, eat that.” (points up) "Up there are the archives, watch all of those while you wear the t-shit, eat the sandwich and click on the google ads.” (whisper)
“Are the new viewers gone yet?”
- could have a scroll at the bottom for the hearing impaired. This could say something entirly different, perhaps what he's really thinking....
- shoot, i had the same idea, but you beat me to it (tour of the page, pointing around). i thought it would be for new viewers, but now that the page has changed, old viewers (like me: one-and-a-half weeks!) could use a tour too. can we leave it up to ze what to say? he's way funnier. but maybe that's not in the spirit of fabuloso friday 2.
- Maybe instead of the scrolling subtitles Ze could do an homage to the old SNL weekend update by doing a picture-in-picture and just screaming everyting that he said before very quickly. It's funny, but it is a bit inconsiderate and it obviously has been done before.
- From Wikipedia: ...the practice of a picture insert of a person simultaneously giving the news read in sign language for the hearing impaired was parodied by Garrett Morris. Chase would sometimes repeat the top story at the end of the segment, while Morris simply cupped his mouth and shouted the headline more loudly.
Video Game
Splice 3 sec random shots here and there of ze playing a video game. Camera is behind his shoulder you can only see part of the computer screen. Dragged out could also be
Are the new viewes gone yet?
- Killing the bad guys - "die die die"
- End of Game losing - "Ahhhh! Man! shit!"
- Plays atheist and makes the guy keep walking off the edge - "giggles."
- Watch him plays solitaire -"clicking mouse."
Windng up- Winding down
winding up - 12 secs. in the life of zefrank - waking up, yawing, unbuttoning the top button of his jamies, brush teeth, flush toilet, eating breakfast, drinking coffee, typing on the computer, eating lunch, putting his coat or cap on walking out the door.
-winding down 12 secs. in the life of zefrank - walking in the door taking off his coat or hanging up his cap, eating dinner, typing on the computer, drinking coffee, flush toilet, brush teeth, buttoning the top button of his jammies, yawning, falling asleep.
- He can film these tasks in regular speed then tie them together and fast forward.
- Chop them up into three short frames for each task. "Here is how my day went."
- Move some tasks fast, some slow.
- Take one task, like eating a sandwich, film the whole process in regular speed then zip through it in 15 seconds.
- Same as above, but setting the film at regular speed while he picks something caught in his teeth with his tongue, once sucessfull speed the film up again. How ever he would like to approach this idea, as long as it is a common task and is completed in 15 seconds.
- Same idea only in panic mode for any number of scenarios.
Cat
Ze: Your friend or loved one has directed you to this site because you like cute things more than what would be deemed fucked up. You must now be fucked up with (beat) fucked up stuff
(Flash to Ze pointing a fake gun at his cat)
Ze: Are the ne--nice users gone yet?