Fabuloso Friday 2/MISC
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Fabuloso Friday is like...
Fabuloso signs arround the world
Fabuloso signs arround the world cut to flickr:86049811@N00/171142510/ -fanfare music-] Ze voiceover: [sounding enthusiastic] And now it's time for Fabuloso Signs Arround the World.]
[cut to Ze looking concerned] People in other cultures find it important to point out things that we take for granted here in America.
[cut to] Ze voice over: For instance, in Panama the friendly governemnt folk make it easy... http://static.flickr.com/66/171142508_5489a7d1c1.jpg?v=0
[cut to] Ze voice over: for you to know where to catch the bus for the electro boogie competition... flickr:86049811@N00/171142511/
[cut to] Ze voice over: the appropiate place...flickr:86049811@N00/171142514/
[cut to] Ze voice over: ...to trash your car flickr:86049811@N00/171142514/
[cut to] Ze voice over: so you can collect on the insurance, flickr:86049811@N00/171142512/
[cut to] Ze voice over: or a visual reminder to foreigners...flickr:86049811@N00/171149326/
[cut to] Ze voice over: ...that you're in Panama when you realize...flickr:86049811@N00/171149327/ flickr:margotlpz/171149328/
[cut to] Ze voice over: ...that even street signs have big asses flickr:86049811@N00/171149329/ flickr:86049811@N00/171149330/
misc
- This is a great concept. I love Ze's 'explanations' of design iconography. Bobbie mac 16:47, 20 June 2006 (PDT)
If guitars could talk, they would ask for Jimmy Page!
Fabuloso Friday Sponsor
(to go near the beginning).
Ze: This week's bite-sized Fabuloso Friday is sponsored by shitty mini-food that you get at 'posh' parties.
[Medium close up]
Ze: It's designed so you don't feel so bad about gorging your face.
[Extreme close up of Ze with his mouth full of food.]
Ze: (Talking like a woman and spitting food) I just LOVE these hors d'oeuvres!!!
Fundamental Fundamentalist Crazies
Ze quotes Jerry Falwell then analizes the quote. Jerry Falwell is funny as hell cause he is such a little twit already. This would work for Pat Robertson, the double speaking Hillary Rod-your-ham Clinton or any other political/religious hardcharger; left or right.
Green Ze
This might truly be an outdated idea, but how about having a lil' Environmental awareness segment? [1] Japan says 'let's regulate commercial whaling', the environmentalists see this 'leading to an expansion of hunting'. There's the issue of 'scientific whaling', which, it's been said, is a loophole to be exploited. ...WHICH leads us neatly to the section entitled Movie Reviews..rented or theatre, in which Ze reviews Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home. PERFECT! :D *big cheesy grin* CeruleanNinja 15:52, 17 June 2006 (PDT)
In Science News...
In science news, physicists recently revealed that they’ve discovered a method to create small “mini black holes” in laboratory experiments. The process of smashing nuclei and creating quarks and gluons creates a momentary plasma ball that’s about 300 times hotter than the surface of the sun. Scientists have detected this plasma ball sucking in jets of particles around it and emerging as black hole “Hawking” radiation.
When asked what he thought of the potentially cataclysmic scientific discovery, President Bush responded: “[long, drawn-out, increasingly hysterical comic book villain laugh]”
Internet Neutrality
Time for me to tell all of you to do something about Internet Neutrality, or you sportsracers might not see me for much longer! If telecommunication companies get their way, I might have to start paying them to put my show on the web, and if I don't have enough money, I'll be long gone! Go check out www.savetheinternet.com for more information! And tell your friends, because this is incredibly important and eveyone needs to know!
- this is important but really boring and you are a bad person for suggesting it
- Come up with something better, then, because if you want sites like this to still exist in a couple years something needs to get done now. ThinkBig
- excellent comment, excellent and true
- Yes, pushing political agendas should at least be funny. Or pretend to be funny. Or something. "Some big companies want to charge other, smaller companies two or three times for the use of The Internet. [Different Angle] Or as I like to say, La Internet Grande! [Normal view] A lot of you don't like paying at all for the Internet. [Closeup, whispering a la "are the new viewers gone yet?"] Are you out of your parent's basement yet? [Normal view] So the League of Awesomeness wants you to go out and [fingerquote] "Neutralize" the Internet. [Shot of Ze looking manic, threatening to cut an ethernet cable with a pair of scissors.]" - From boring PSA to Exciting Mandate from the League of Awesomeness! Thenomain
- In the future you will need a literacy license to drive on the information super highway. You will have to pass a driver's test which will be comprised of all the shit you shoulda learned in High School English Class. Failing that you will be remanded to dial-up Hell, slow downloads (ooooo), and no firewalls. Bet you'll learn English now dumbshit! Ze could explain this concept vvveeerrryyy sslloowwllyy and then whip out his English for Dummies course available for S and H only!
Movie Reviews..rented or theatre
15 second movie reviews. This could easily be a winner
- Awesome idea! How about reviewing Nacho Libre, which is released this Friday (in teh USofA). Jack Black. In a cape. Doesn't it scream Power Move to you? Schamaun, peoples! :D CeruleanNinja 00:33, 16 June 2006 (PDT)
I dig it. But let's do non-new releases. Movies that are GOOD and have stood the test of time. Like Rear Window, Mr. Smith Goes to Washington, Or something equally bad ass.
- I like this idea. I bet Ze has seen lots of really cheesy campy movies. I would love to see a review from time to time...actually reviewing porn would be soooo cooool!!!
The Ken Burns Effect?
Ze should most definitely begin the show with a variation on the "Ze Frank Effect" (with a tree that looks like a crotch and TONS of lightning) ending with a Sports Racer logo. Possibly some cheesy "breaking news" style music.
The RIAA
The RIAA is now issuing Cease-and-Desist orders to children who post videos of themselves dancing to music on YouTube (http://suicidegirls.com/news/geek/16727/). <insert Ze's commentary here> ASSHOLES! (of course)
S-s-something for the newbies
With all of the recent exposure new viewers are showing up every day. Eager, fresh-faced future Sports Racers thirsty for knowledge and vying for a position in the League of Awesomeness. They don’t have Power Moves yet, they don’t yet know how to identify a Hard Charger. They may or may not have an opinion about duckies.
What they DO have, however, are a lot of questions and a lot of suggestions. “Hey Ze, don’t you like Republicans?” “Hey Ze, I don’t like the songs.” “Hey Ze, what’s the deal with giant babies?’”
So here’s a tip for the newly initiated: sit back, give it a week, and all will become clear. Asking “What’s that mean?” after watching one episode is like coming in halfway through a season of 24 and asking “Why’s the older brother form Lost Boys threatening that lady from Designing Women?”
Ze explains the best way to set up a MySpace page
Ze talks us quickly through was information simply has to go on a myspace page, and what he hopes to achieve by doing so. Preferrably in a valley girl accent, and hopefully involving actually setting up a myspace page. -des-
I just bet Ze has a lot to say about this.
Ze press conference
Alright, a bit like the brainstorming, except a press conference or interview with Bobo twins style journalists. So we either hear some mumbling or just silence and then Ze goes "The questions was" or "so, how do I deal with my recent success...
So, please go ahead and write possible questions and answers here... or maybe we can leave the answers to Ze:
- Babies instinctively respond by staring at people who smile at them. Why do you call them assholes?
- What is the purpose of forming an earth sandwitch, wouldn't sending the food to starving children be a better use of the Earth's sandwitch resources?
- What is the nutritional value of an Earth sandwich?
- Are you planning a summer sale of meaningless products?
Iraq War Screed
As the freakish Jr. High Popularity Contest we Americans call “Election Time” draws nigh, it’s time for me to sit in my air-conditioned office on my fat ass and weigh in on the Iraq war.
The Republicans want to stay and fight. Fine. Rich congressmen and their spawn don’t have to worry about it, because they are too old and their children are to wealthy to fight a war. They are too busy with school and careers and things like that to fight for “freedom.” Let the less fortunate get their arms and legs blown off in the name of Freedom. (The freedom for rich folk to fill up their Hummers! Hoo-ya!)
Of course, I generalize here.
The Democrats want to say they are against the war, but they also have to worry about their careers. While they want the war to end, they can’t say the “T” word (timetable) because they will be painted as cowards. Since they need to save their seats more than stand by a principle, they too have to say we need to stay, otherwise Iraq will fall into the wrong hands. They are too scared to just come out and say, “Let’s get the f*ck out of there now!
Damned if We Do, Damned if We Don’t.
Again, I generalize here, because I’m typing this off the top of my head, with no real research or facts to back up what I type. Stop reading now! It gets worse!
Here’s the problem with “winning” in Iraq: The only success we can have in Iraq is digging ourselves out of a hole we dug ourselves into.
So we can only hope to break even, which is looking less and less likely.
Of course the contractors in Iraq are winning CA$H, but rich people and their cronies tend to do that. Good for them. War profiteering isn’t that much of a crime, is it?
Saddam would have had to work overtime torturing and killing people to keep up with the lawlessness we’ve spawned over there. We’ve brought torture and beheadings and bombings to a fever pitch. We’ve created a lawless hellhole that is FREEDOM! Taste the Freedom and Democracy.
I feel bad for the soldiers. They joined the Department of DEFENSE. Defense means defense. Not offence. So. I feel bad because they aren’t being allowed to do their jobs.
The Military has only two functions:
1. Kill people.
2. Blow shit up.
That’s it. We have the best military in the world, but you can’t expect them to play referee in a Civil War we set off.
At least the VFW can continue to make money selling beer to bitter guys in wheelchairs for decades to come! That will help our economy a little, won’t it?
I mean if we really “liberated” Iraq, set them free: Get the hell out of there and let them kill each other. Who cares? They are FREEEeeeeee! Weee! Isn’t Freedom great? Turn em loose and watch em go!
When we invade a country, let’s come right out and say it: “We’re invading Iraq for its oil and strategic military bases in the region.” Go in guns blazing, hole up in walled fortresses, and let the natives fend for themselves. Kill anything that moves. That’s how you invade a country.
Don’t have the stomach for it? Then don’t invade. Go big or go home . . . Pussies.
There, that is my misinformed, reactionary, belligerent screed about Iraq. Enjoy.
submitted by dan www.danmanning.com