SportsRacer Holiday MySpace Adoption Program

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I'm working on putting together a list of all the people listed here if you are working on a list too let me know before I take this notice down. thanks


A Proposal

"Shhh... So I was on myspace today and I have 2200 Friends. But I started to think about all the people out there with very few friends. People who might be feeling lonely. So, we have to adopt someone. Lets find someone on myspace who wiends in one day. Its the sportsracer holiday myspace adoption program."

See below for a summary of MySpace users who are getting substantial support. Let's try to narrow this list down - pick your fav!

I would like to suggest that we adopt both John and Jess. They're both in the target Sports Racer Demographic and it's a neck and neck race. Plus it's not like we have to feed them, make them share a bedroom, or squeeze them into the family car...

When we actually formally adopt, we should make sure that the "The Show" icon is among the top friends in each profile.

We need to nominate this guy. He has one friend, the guy that works at My Space!

-Bob from Fremont

I nominate CK from Colorado Springs. She describes herself as a "culinary artist," is writing a novel and is passionate about drawing and painting. There are a couple of pencil drawings that she did in her pics section, so I believe she is legit. She invited me to be a friend a week ago and so far I'm her only friend. --Bill Dolan

I nominate de.anna she seems cool, looks like she knows of ze somehow, although not a sportsracer i think. she only has 3 friends thats sad.

It looks as though John M Baker ( is in the lead, because the same people keep voting for him over and over

I notice a lot of people here nominating friends of theirs, which makes sense, because how else would you find someone on MySpace to nominate? The problem is, Ze specifically said we should nominate someone who "we don't know, and who doesn't know us".

  • We're looking for total strangers now.

I propose that on Wednesday, I make a selection at random from this Google search (has zero friends, but has logged in this month). I will make a video documenting this process to ensure fairness. I will post the result of my selection here. Thoughts? --Tweek 16:36, 15 December 2006 (PST)

  • I like the idea, but just people with zero friends? I would think 0-10 would be better. You even START with one. Also, perhaps we could pick two or three people, then vote on which one we think is best.
    • It looks like John Baker even deleted Tom. I don't know how open he is to new friends.
    • Yeah, you start with one, unless you're an up-tight freak who goes "who is this Tom guy?" and deletes him. (um ...i did that! and had no friends for ages)
    • I was thinking the same thing. To remove Tom and not add anyone just means he's too cool for the social networking aspect. I unsecond John. He wouldn't appreciate the Sports Racer love.
*** This looks to be true sadly.
  • I think that we should be careful to see how long somebody has been on myspace when judging how many friends they have (click on view all blog entries, even if they don't have a blog, and on the right side of the page, it will tell you when they signed up)
  • I like this idea as well. Certainly, though, it should be 5 or fewer friends (or ten or whatever). Zero should be out of the question, as should one, simply because we want to make sure it's not just someone who has a bunch of friends but hasn't figured out MySpace yet. (I cleaned up this "A Proposal" section a bit. Hope no on revised Google search which will display users who have between 2-10 friends and have logged in this month. --Tweek 11:37, 16 December 2006 (PST)
  • I think we should assign each nomination a letter value (plus blank) and then draw the lucky MySpacer out of a bag of Scrabble tiles. 'Twould be only poetic. --lukkucairi 18:14, 16 December 2006 (MST)
  • we've already some good choices, a random selection wont find anyone better than Rando or Lisa --Deflective 23:08, 16 December 2006 (PST)
  • I like Lisa. I think she should be the lucky person.
* Lisa hasn't logged on since 12/2
  • Just as a warning: a lot of people turn down random friends immediately. It may be wise to test-friend our nominees to see if they accept random friends. Would be an awful flop to adopt someone who refuses to be adopted.
  • I think we clearly cannot accept nominations of people who have their profile set to private. We can't evaluate them fairly. And we can't even determine how many friends they have.
    • Besides, if someone has their profile open it seems like they're more interested in meeting new people. A person who is trying to meet new people and unable to do so would probably be the most in need, right?
  • Let's not make the mistake of assuming that someone who just has no friends is in need of them. Some people might just not care about myspace (put no time into it or put no time into finding their friends online) -- we don't want to adopt someone who doesn't even check their myspace account.
  • I propose we set some criteria: (such as)
    • Log in within the past month
    • put serious effort into their myspace page
      • Blog entries a plus
    • under a certain number of friends
    • This way we can try and guarantee that the individual cares about their myspace page and would most appreciate the adoption.
  • So, basically what we have now as a procedural format is this - correct me if I'm missing something:
    • we collect nominations here
    • we check to make sure that they
      • log in
      • put some effort into their page
      • don't have profile set to private
      • accept random friends
      • don't have too many friends (have we agreed on an upward limit? 10?)
      • blog, or at least try to
    • and then we take the whittled down nominations and make a choice.
  • Question: how do we choose among those left if we have several?
    • poll in the forum?
    • short straw?
    • suggestions? --lukkucairi 13:20, 17 December 2006, MST
    • are we supposed to choose one? ze asked us to "fire up the wiki to nominate people," suggesting he'll do the choosing? --Deflective 19:46, 17 December 2006 (PST)

  • Is there any reason why we need to stick to a single person? Can we take the top 10?, Which way would make the biggest impact? If we picked the loneliest person on myspace or we picked the "SportsRacers Adoption of the Top Ten Lonely People of MySpace 2006"?--Swimfins 11:07, 17 December 2006 (PST)
  • I'm really bad at math! --lukkucairi
    • 21.8543 times over, even!... But I wouldn't be surprised if individual SportsRacers decided to adopt some runners-up. Aside: any possibility that people with profile view counters are going to catch on to the extra attention before the decision is made? --zauberfrosch 23:08, 17 December 2006, GMT+3
  • I think we should steer very clear from making selections based on perceived 'lonely' people or 'friendless' people. While I agree the selection should be made with someone who has few friends, I don't think its particularly nice to imply that we're simply adding as a charity to them. Someone could likely take offense to, rather than appreciate the gesture. Also, I think the 'test' random friend is ill advised, as a single random friend 'test' might not be indicative of what they'd do in the situation where a few hundred people add them. I think perhaps Thursday a representative (maybe ze himself?) send them a message letting them know of the suprise.--argyle 12:05, 17 December 2006 (PST)
  • We should be careful. Picking the loneliest person might seem condescending. "I'm only your friend cause you're too pathetic to have any real ones." Then again I don't use myspace, so I don't know how things work.
  • Can't we get banned from adopting a myspace user all at once? The myspace staff might get really confused. Also, won't it be very time-consuming to accept 1000+ friends? Will Ze make an introductory request to explain what's going on? Any thoughts? (-loo loo)
  • Also keep in mind that spammers make fake accounts... just 0-1 friends would indicate something screwy since it *is* a community based site.
    • ^This is an excellent criteria to consider. Current friends (while few) should be checked for validity.

      • Uh, it's my understanding that most people on myspace over 30 are either stalkers, or are lame parents trying to be as cool as their kids by using the internets. Can we have some canidates between 20-30, maybe??***-genissimo
  • What's wrong with old people they need friends too?! -- Annakaela
    • Nice generalization, isn't ze himself 34?
    • Dude - some of the other viewers (ahem, me and several of my friends) are myspace users and ze show viewers over 30 who are not stalkers or trying to be cool like their "kids". It's a tool we use to stay in touch. It's not about age. Let's move on, shall we?

  • How will this work? Will Ze look at the nominations and form a list, like he did with the ugly myspace? Will last call be Wednesday midnight? Will he weed out people who don't fit? There aren't that many nominations. Will everyone vote on Thursday? Will he be the only one who knows? Will he tell everyone on Friday who to befriend?

  • This guy is extremely tempting...he has slighlt over 19 friends, but just check them out....he need help..let's give him something to cheer about this Xmas...[1]

  • I nominate for their extreme ugliness and loserdom. He/she has a few friends, but he needs a makeover, physically and socially as well!

  • I nominate He has three friends, one including his sister. Great friend, great sense of humor and Canadian. I met him through a video game and have known him for the last 2 years. I introduced him to myspace, but.... he has 3 friends =)
  • if only george bush had tried this in iraq


Summary of Front runners

Here's a summary of all the potential MySpace users who have received at least a nomination plus two supporting votes.

-IMPORTANT NOTE ABOUT JOHN- I just tried to friend John and Myspace told me that since he "only accepts people who knows" I had to know either his last name or his e-mail address. Thankfully I'm a smart little duckie and recognised John's last name IN HIS USERNAME and I made my friend request. -Rarcke (Normally I wouldn't have bothered to friend someone so pretentious that he only wants people who know him to friend him and yet has NO friends, but it's the holidays!)

John has also found us out!

From his blog:

Who on earth is Zefrank?

I appear to have been nominated for 'the most lonely guy on myspace award' according to the Zefrank show. Seriously, I'm fine!

Perhaps you think I'm joking - check it out:

What to do, oh what to do?! -Hoekenheef

      • 12/22, 8:30 AM EST: Looks like Jess approved some people, but not me :(
      • 12/22, 8:30 AM EST: He hasn't even logged in yet. The suspense is KILLING ME!

Edit this section as more nomination votes come in. But make sure you add your vote for a user into the list below. Changing the vote number here without adding a line of support to a candidate below will likely result in someone recounting the votes in the future and having your vote lost.

Removed DeweytheDecimal b/c he's not listed in the voting below, and didn't have any votes for him. Plus he's been on myspace since at least August

All Nominations

I'd like to nominate this guy... He has 0 friends and hasn't logged in since 12/4. This guys is needs some loving. I'd like to nominate Tammy, who apparently loves her kids. And umm... her daughter says she killed Barney. That's good enough for me.

I vote for Jess. I don't know her, but she is from MA...and I'm from MA - so that's my lame reason.

Neil Pickus: He has my vote... malialle

it has to be: - trust me...

  • this guy looks like he needs a few freinds i saw some of his comments before he set it to private sounded really depressed

  • needs some serious sports racer luvin'
    • i second that
    • 3rd on this..
    • Just a note that he last logged in mid November. - mattburnsey

  • First time posting on the site, so I'm unfamiliar with the convention (top-post vs. bottom) but he looks like he could use some love

  • Not a person, but a political movement that only has six friends :(. I say we give them a helping hand in promoting awareness of their movement. How great would these guys (and gals) behind the myspace feel if all of a sudden people appeared to be taking them seriously?
  ** I second this nomination. Great idea, wonder if Minnesotans will get behind it. Someone I've never met, but who's profile I really like.

  • I'd like to nominate John. He has no friends and has been posting blog entries (including one about his lightbulbs!) since September.
    • I second this nomination of John. He seems like a charming fellow and fulfills pretty much every criteria perfectly. We might need to test-friend him though.
    • I third this guy. No friends. Nice guy.
    • I forth him- this guy seems really nice and he could use some friends :-)
    • I fifth him! He looks like he would be blown away by the sudden burst of friend requests.
    • Sixthed, on account of the fact that he is Powered by monkeys !!!
    • 7th! This guy dose looks good, he seems to care about his myspace/blog and he dose not even have a friend!
    • Eighthed. I agree, Infinite monkeys are incredibly potent.
    • Ninthed. I like this one.
    • These are just nominations... the voting will be Thursday. But that having been said, I Tenth this dude.
    • Consider him eleventh-ed. Mushroom dishes, Milton Keynes, shambolic cable systems... his geek quotient is off the chart. Plus, nobody wished him happy birthday.
    • twelfthed, twelfed,tweld,tweveled, 12veld. Ze! this is the one. this guy looks like the one to me!!!!!!
    • Fourteenthed, he has terrible taste in movies, and needs to be edumacated!
    • Fifteenthed! He seems cute and smart and athletic but has no, no, no friends!
    • I voted for JEss, but would also be completely ok with this dude. So either works for me. geechee_girl
    • Sixteenthed, the blog posts and log ins everyday make him perfect!
    • seventeenthed. He seems like a nice guy, but lonely. he could use some friends. hes also probably confused by the massive amounts of page views hes getting now
    • Eighteenthed?
    • Nineteenthed...
    • Twentiethed, tentatively. He seems cool and together. But is there a chance that he's just using MySpace as blog software, and intentionally ignoring the networking aspect?
    • Twentyfirsted: and now we can do shots!
    • Twentyseconded: He seems very cool. I'd vote for him over Jess -- I'm not sure she'd accept new friends, but he seems like he'd find this whole thing fun.
    • Twentythirded: JohnMBaker seems like someone who would appreciate the idea of having a bunch of random strangers all become his friend at once. Many of the "has 0 friends" people I looked at are anti-social - they don't want new friends. John looks good!
    • Twentyfourthed: JohnMBaker can be my friend.
    • Not sure what happend to 25 but I'll Twentysixth him. Twentysixthed'd! There, I did it.
    • I agree with 20 and 22 here (thought my vote still falls in Jess's corner), he may not be interested in the networking aspects of myspace at all. Someone should test his likelyhood in accepting a random friend.
    • Twentyseventh'd!!!
    • I don't trust this guy, I think he's intentionally cleared out all his friends, possibly because they were all 14 year old boys and the cops are on to him.
    • I vote for Jess as I think she is more likely to accept the friend requests - John hasn't even listed "who he wants to meet", which suggests to me that the answer is "nobody"
    • I vote for John, maybe I'll get some friends out of this deal too. :-( <lol>
    • I think this guy deserves this more than anyone else-jimthenglishman
    • I vote for John. I think he would be perfect for this. I might just add him anyway.
    • I vote for John. He has ideas, he seems like a great person, and more importantly I'd be his friend if I knew him outside of myspace -Phos
    • I vote for John as well. Let's get his power monkeys going with some friends! -Hoekenheef
    • Anyone that can properly punctuate the plural of DVD has got my vote.
    • I vote for John, but i think we should also vote for Jess. One Boy one Girl.
    • Any Rik Mayall fan should be a friend of mine. -adriene
    • I vote for John partly because he seems like he might enjoy the experience of being adopted as much as we enjoy adopting someone. --brightpearl
    • I vote for John, but will he accept us?
    • I think John's an excellent candidate. He get's my vote. -moo
    • Just checked out SRs on the ORG and there are two in Milton Keynes...dunc and grouchal...could they be John? He has been blogging on MySpace since September, so I think he's innocent. He deserves to be adopted anyway, he lives in Milton Keynes, which, for those of you who don't know, is one of the worst towns on the planet. Let's big him up!!
    • I vote for John!
    • Yet another John vote.
    • John is our man!!
      • I Elect John!
    • John has nifty hair, and he admits to living in Milton Keynes. I vote for John. lukkucairi
    • Vote, Second, Cool Guy, Possibly Speed Racer, etc.
    • He's the ideal for the project... and not scarey. Here's another one for John.
    • I vote for John... That guys a character
    • The whole monkeys thing blows me away. John has my vote. There is simply nothing to pity about this guy.
      • John has monkeys in his headline. Do we need more reason to reach out?

!!!!!Monkeys!!!!! Vote number 1,000,000!!!! /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

  • This guy has no hair but a hopeful grin and a sad, but compelling song. He's like a sad clown master of ceremonies. Give him a chance.
  • fourthed --Emperorzombie
  • Mellissa votes for Tom
  • Interurban Films supports Mr. Fagan
  • Captain Starchild votes for Fagan

  • Found this guy on a myspace search. One of his 8 comments reads:"Dude, you need some freinds, haha"

  • I second this nomination. Of his friends, 2 have apparently been deleted due to spamming (myspace shows 5 friends but 3 profiles), and 1 of the remaining friends is a comment spammer. That and he has no heroes. - posted by argyle to remove anonymity and potential conflict of interest

i third this rando guy, looks like a real winer, and im really glad the girl two spots below me loves the pen15.

Yeah this guy's been signed up for about five months, and still only has 2 friends. And he updated his profile today, so he keeps up with the site. Oh, and his name is Rando- that just screams "adopt me"

Fourth for Rando! He's trying to make friends and just getting spam accounts. A few thousand people would make his year!

  • this woman definitely seems like she could use some new friends.
  • I second this nomination!!
  • Yeah this woman looks sweet- she should have more friends-
  • I support this lady!
  • I'm voting for Lisa! She definately could use some friends.

  • i nominate this girl because although her profile is set to private (thus i don't know much about her), she is grounded right now and that sucks. also...look at the link...she feels alone. people who feel alone need cheering up by us.
    • We should avoid limiting our selection to cute girls ;) Plus, it seems kinda uncomfortable to me to be showering so much attention on a 17-year-old girl. If I were her father, I'd find that pretty suspicious, especially if I was a technophile or something like that. --Rocco 19:45, 15 December 2006 (PST)
      • for the record, i nominated her because she's lonely. i don't have a crush on her. i am a girl and i like pen15s, not va61nas.

  • A duckie for an image. Only 3 friends signed up. And is online to get some friends. (so says profile). Sounds perfect to me.
  • I second this nomination! Under television, this duckie has :Square, not flat yet:. I love that.

(Nomination retracted by nominator. Reason: already an acquaintance)

  • I did a random Google search and found this guy. Looks like he doesn't have much on the page, but if he more friends perhaps he could feel part of the myspace community and publish polls and quizes.
  • I nominate this kid named Ben, I dont know him but he seems likable.most of his friends already are just bands and famous people that add everyone who asks. He seems to update his profile relatively often. keep in mind that i dont know this person. I thought that the point was to pick someone that we didnt know already--\/

    • Should also be somebody who has at least checked their myspace in the last couple of weeks, shouldn't it?
  • My wife, Sheila. She only has 13 friends and keeps her page fairly up to date. She's definitely NOT a Sports Racer. In fact she thinks I'm retarded for spending so much time on the computer. Plus, every time I log in to Myspace she's always saying "Ooooo 600 profile views". It would be SOOO awesome if we could adopt her. At the very least, drive her profile views through the roof - that alone would make her feel special! --Mphetameme 14:30, 15 December 2006 (PST)
  • How about this guy, Ben? He's a pretty neat guy that I know, but he only has 35 friends. He keeps his profile updated pretty often and logs in once every two days at the minimum. Plus, he has no clue who Ze or the Sports Racers are, but I'm pretty sure that he would love it all once he found out about it. -Hoekenheef
  • I'd like to suggest my old friend from high school, Chad. Although his MySpace page boasts 68 friends, most of them are from washed-up 80's hair metal bands who also have MySpace pages. C'Mon, I guarantee that Lita Ford is NOT his friend! And I bet that if he got thousands of add requests all at once, it would just overwhelm him - the reaction would be priceless. This guy needs some new friends!

I Nominate my good Friend Happy Penguin, he is the best and is always there fo me bu ti feel bad cuz he only had 12 friends so pony up and lets all adopt Happy Penguin

  • Old roomie from College. Kept to herself, woke up early, studied greek! She has 11 friends and is probably happy with that. Let's help her out of her shell! Never mind, she'd deny all of you.
  • I would like to nominate my shy robot friend Randy. He only has three friends right now and I know it would make his holiday if he were to be adopted. Thanks -- Randy Myspace
-How about we nominate someone that no one knows. Don't chose someone because they're already your friend. That's fairly lame.

^Yes! No more nominating friends! It makes the process dubious, as they potentially know about Zefrank!

  • affable hipster's mom only has 2 friends, and one of them is a myspace employee who has 139,450,827 friends. it's friendly but harsh at the same time. besides she's a "christian-other" & that's got to be a good thing these days, right? This guy has like 67 friends, but he's an avid myspace checker. For his occupation he's got "Loser =[" and in his pictures has random pictures of him and Tweety bird and his "emo" bird.

  • Found this potential Sports Racer after wading through six pages of new MySpace users. She is a 27 year old wife and mother, with interests including photography, Radiohead, The Muppets Christmas and Captain Underpants. As if more needed to be said, she seems quite level headed and only has 3 friends as of this posting. She already has a not-too-ugly MySpace layout and last logged in today (15-Dec-2006).
  • not only did she log in on the 15th, she created her page on the 15th. since her page was created she has had two new friends every day. --Deflective 13:25, 18 December 2006 (PST)
  • I was one of those friends, but it is a good point. I say we wait it out a few days (maybe till, say, thursday) and see how she ends up panning out. -mattburnsey68.146.239.224 21:50, 18 December 2006 (PST)
    • I agree, I nominate her as well. She doesn't have many friends (come on guys, some of the nominees have over 30!) and isn't connected to us at all. -mattburnsey
    • I third this one.
    • I fourth and fifth this one.
    • I sixth this one.
    • I seventh it, and I have an enormous 'Net crush on her.
    • Cute girl, check. Nice page design, check. Not very many friends, check. I have no choice but to eighth the nomination.
    • A suggestion: As stated above one of us should attempt to make a random friend invite to see if she would accept, because it would be brutal to choose her and have nothing come of it because she won't accept. But I notice her friend count has gone up... Has someone done this already? Or should we go ahead and one of us attempt the connection? EDIT I threw out the friend invite for her and she accepted, she does take random friend invites. -mattburnsey
    • I ninth this one.
    • Consider this one tenthed. She's a relatively new mom, so we should be her collective even newer mom. Maybe she can give us some pointers?
    • I think we can do better than this girl. it will probably sound bad, but she doesn't seem depressed enough. i mean, with a new baby and wedding she probably doesn't even have time to watch the show.
    • I eleventh this one! She seems fun and creative, and I bet her baby has a cute powermove.
    • Twelve-ed! - I wonder if she's noticed her profile views skyrocketing... - Attila
    • THIRTEENED - she looks like a potential fun Sports Racer.  :) geechee_girl (on MySpace I'm /postonbarber)
    • Umpteenthed! Too bad she doesn't Blog. Maybe her first will be about all of her new friends? I don't think "pathetic/depressed" should be a necessary criteria, just my .02 though. I mean, really, none of uss seem to pathetic or depressed!
    • fifthteenthed! not too happy, not too sad.
    • I hereby sixteenth the motion to adopt Jess.
    • Since my original horse (Rando) hasn't panned out and has no chance, I'm willing to throw my weight behind Jess. Consider me #17 --argyle 09:02, 19 December 2006 (PST)
    • 18th... can we have a boy *and* a girl?
    • 19th, she seems like she'd be a perfect Sports Racer.
    • 20th, my nomination and I stand by her Possiblymalignant 22:36, 19 December 2006 (PST)
    • 21 -- she's the sort of person who would really dig The Show
    • Another great nomination. 22nd.
    • Yet another. I think she'd get a kick out of being "adopted" rather than freaking out. And she logs on daily. Lisa hasn't been on since 12/2
    • Put me in for Jess. ~fuzzmartin
    • 25 for jess. way more potential than john baker. and she likes to learn to play w/ baby toys! duckies, anyone?!
    • 26 votes for Jess... I like her better than John :P
    • 29 votes for Jess ... i dont know where the other two went ... but what a cute baby! Did anyone look at the picture?

It seems to me that the people in the top of the running are Lisa, Rando, and Jess. Is this correct??? I also want to say, this is really messy. Maybe we should make a new header, where it's just a list of potentials with links to their myspace?

    • Lisa's blog about her xanga site upsets me a bit. Firstly, it's from the beginning of November. Second, two of the three posts in that time are about her affilate sites with and Amazon. Said Xanga lists her occupation as "Entrepreneur" of the "diet/weight-loss, rare dvds" industry. This saddens me deeply, as she may be past the point of help.
    • It should also be noted that she has not logged into MySpace since 12/2, last xanga post is 12/8.
  • Call me a dick, but I feel like I'd have to constantly explain why I've got Lisa on my list. I vote for Jess.
    • What about John, mentioned earlier??? John and Jess?
  • Francis makes me laugh, and i think he needs us. let's help him bring THE BROWN BAG INVASION to life. bugger, noticed he hasn't logged on since sept...-Lady Leary This guy has been on myspace for over a year and he only has 7 friends :(

  • I retracted my nomination because there are others who seem to be 'less fortunate' in the friends department than my original nomination. :)

A faster way to search would be:

"1 friends"? My 9th grade English teacher would plotz!

They try so hard yet they have very little friends. I think they would deserve some help this holiday season.

What about a lost duckie?

How about this guy? Look's like he could use a friend, I don't know him and his only two friends are "tom" and a band.

OK, so I work with this guy... he thinks he's the shit, he has a ton of "hot friends" and I think that we could use this holiday season help show him the true meaning of sport-racer friendship.

This girl looks pretty lonely.

A swinger with no friends is very sad, no? It must be hard trying to make friends on MySpace when you're a dog.

I've known this woman for many years now. She's one of the best friends I've ever known. She's recently moved from Detroit to Florida for a job, and moved in with someone from "Looking for Roommates" in the classifieds. She doesn't know anyone down there, and she's very lonely. She's only got 33 MySpace friends, and a lot of them are her family that are 1000 miles away.


I would like to nominate my psycho vietnamese algebra teacher, Mr. Le. Mr. Le has one friend, Tom. His students would all support adoptimg Mr. Le, for christmas, he got gifts that included a box of tampons and a bag of rice. Search on myspace for Christopher Le, and find the picture of the early thirties asian man who is naked from the waist up and lives in Portland, Oregon.

I, ApacheChief, nominate myself; I keep to myself most of the time of MySpace, this would be quite a change.

Seems like we need to adopt more than just one person. there's a lot of lonely people out there! how about - Lisa, Rando, Jess and ThomasFagan. We can certainly make friends with more than one. We sports racers have a lot of love to give.

Tom Fagan seems kinda creepy and I have to question, if he has 0 friends, does he even want friends?

Yes currently everyones friend in Ipswitch UKmore information here - however mySpace has deleted his account now.

Here's a good fella!! I think Adam from Minneapolis, Minnesota want's some more friends. He's, and I quote, "looking for anyone, I don't care" Perfect!!! -dreaMarie

  • I like that one too -hackaday
    • I likie.

Danielle logged in today. Doesn't have any friends, but that means she had the presence of mind to delete Tom. -hackaday

Looks like a nice guy, has three children, just divorced, travels a lot for work, likes photography. He was on page 59 of the Google search and has no friends despite a couple of weeks at least on MySpace.

i think you should nominate

   She came up on a quick search. Only 15 friends Sports Racers. :(

don't know what or how to look for this person, went through a list of 150 people (75 girls 75 boys) who were single, on line and had few friends these people looked like they might need some adoption. ow ze my eyes ow... what I won't do for you, ow...


boys - boys were harder to find because they kept all the spam sluts

maybe one of these people match yours? also I don't know any of these people I picked, just went through myspace search <--this kid needs a break and her only friends are bands

chick named sarah with only 1 friend (tom). She's signed in recently but still has no friends and no profile to speak of. [2] now technically speak i know her. but you don't, and she's never heard of ze, the show, or sports racers. she'll be alone on xmas, just like she was alone on thanksgiving. and by alone i mean completely. Her, her cat, and a tray of rice crispy treates.

Emily Powell, [, I've never met her, but I chatted with her for a while. She lives in Kentucky, and is leaving for Thailand in a few months, I think.

She's got 8 friends in total and doesn't know what "podcasting" or "vidcasting" or anything pod concerned is. It be funny to spook her with 20,000,000 friends out of the blue. She doesn't even know who Zefrank is... go figure. :) -Z

johnmbaker - this guy needs it. i propose that in return for making this guy a myspace badass, he at least could show us his POWER MOVE. that way he'd be an according-to-hoyle sportsracer.

I vote for Jess. It was a tough call between Jess and John. It just seems that John wouldn't be very interested or open to a thousand friends at once. That is my vote.


"Shhh... So I was on myspace today and I have 2200 Friends. But I started to think about all the people out there with very few friends. People who might be feeling lonely. So, we have to adopt someone. Lets find someone on myspace who we don't know, and who doesn't know us, but who needs some friends. Fabulosos, fire up the wiki to nominate people and next Thursday lets surprise someone by all becoming their friends in one day. Its the sportsracer holiday myspace adoption program."
the show: 12-15-06

"On Thursday we're going to adopt someone from myspace, all requesting to become that person's friend in a single day. Here's the thing, for it to be a surprise, it should be someone we don't know and who doesn't know us. So your friends don't really count.

Try to find someone on myspace who's recently logged in, has few friends, and seems like they should be adopted. Then nominate them using the link in the sidebar.

Don't cheat. After all, it's the SportsRacer Holiday Myspace Adoption Program."
the show: 12-18-06

How to Vote

Many people seem to be confused, so here's a quick note on the bestest way to vote:

  1. If you have a Ze Frank Wiki account, make sure you are logged in (check the upper right of the window). If you don't, that's okay too.
  2. Figure out which person you want to vote for, then click the edit link on the right side of the page next to your person's category.
  3. Type your note below the other votes for that person.
  4. Sign your vote with four tildes ( ~~~~ ). This will automatically include your name if you are signed in or your IP address if you are not, as well as the official time of your vote.

What I did, so you don't have to

Tried my best to use the consensus from the above comments

I separated people by what was listed on their page - single, married/relationship/kids, nothing listed and swinger

If they didn't Login for more then a week I didn't add them

If they had a Virus on their page I didn't add them

If their page was set to Private I didn't add them

If they had more than 10 friends I didn't add them

If they were already Viewers of The Show or Friends, etc., I didn't add them

If you see someone who shouldn’t be on the list please remove them - remember they must be a stranger.

If I missed someone please add them - sorry not all the links worked, etc.

If you want to add someone please make it easy for people to vote for them by adding them in the Late Arrivals - make sure your add follows what was said on The Show.

Confused or stuck? Ask for help in the Discussion or join the Forum

If you can clean this page up to make it easier, feel free!

Please don't comment in the voting area on other people's vote, gets messy - Just vote for who you want to adopt.

Got an opinion? Use the Discussion or join the Forum

If you already decide on a winner and this was all in vain then drop these people a line afterwards, tell them they were in the running and to watch The Show With Ze Frank

How to vote - add your name or IP, try to leave room for others.

Be patiant, many people may be voting at once, make sure your vote is cast.

Remember, Sports Racers don't cheat :)

same for you hard chargers!


1. * - Janne - 1 friends

-Man, I'll vote for this guy, and not because no one else has. I think he's the most friend needy. Firstly, he's foriegn; born in Vaxjo folks, that's right! Secondly, look at that picture; it looks like he's forgetten what a friend is. Awwwwww, you just want to hug him... in a non-sexual way... and from a distance. Thirdly, ...uhhh.... thirdly, you're wrong! And you don't want to stay that way do you? Vote Janne in 2006!

-2nd the motion. I nominated him and I'll vote for him. I'm not one to fall for all that "wasted vote" crap--no vote is wasted. They all send a message whether your candidate wins or loses.--Nine Pound Weakling

2. * - CK - 1 friend

3. * - Jamee Girl - 5 friends

4. * - Jess - 8 friends

--Yay, democracy. Jess gets half a vote from me. ~CourtCat

--Placing my vote ... is this how this works? Gah. - deadgraviti

--A vote for Jess is a vote for a real person! And this is mine. Vote that is. Er, I vote for Jess! -AD

--third vote - searleb

--fourth vote - she looks like someone I would want to be friends with in real life - Julia182

--fifth vote - Lewie

--6th - Curt

--7th - Mattburnsey 20:54, 20 December 2006 (PST) - I'd vote for Jon but he has no friends and no one has attempted to add him as a friend, so we don't even know if he will accept

--8th- Yanc - i agree with mattburnsey, i don't think jon was accepting friends in the first place.

--9th- Voting for Jess -- Adam

--10th- Voting for Jess, because...Catherine

--11th - Yet another for Jess.

--12 for jess. i like her. -rocco

--13 Pirateboy says Jess!

--14 Jess rocks. -Jeff

--15 At least's she's tried to make friends. -adfectio

--16 Her hero is Captain Underpants. That's enough for me. - Kimmyesque

--17 Jess's friend Leah is the reason for my vote. -Shameless

--18 Even though (or maybe because of the fact) she looks eerily like a girl I had a crush on in High School, I give her my vote. -Consumatron

--19 I vote for Jess. Tweek 20:44, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--20 another for jess she seems cool plus i think shes sorta cute :) -JoshL

--21 Jess rules. Yay Jess! -chimerical

--22 Jess is top-notch Sports Racer material. Plus I think she would really understand and appreciate the gesture. Possiblymalignant 22:11, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--23 Jess is perfect. Some friends, but not too many. And genuine. 22:12, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--24 Gotta vote for Jess... Mostly because the others don't really do much for me. Jess seems like someone who'd appreciate what everyone's doing here. 22:37, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--25 I'm on for Jess Zzzuucx 03:59, 21 December 2006 (PST)

--26 for Jess eka83129.170.124.123 05:43, 21 December 2006 (PST)

--27 for Jess - I think John needs more friends but he's not going to accept us. 13:36, 21 December 2006 (PST)


John did not accept my random friend invite.

5. * - John - 0 friends

--1 As a Technical Director, I think this guy can finally answer the question, "How do you work this thing?" -gabs

--2 I think this guy really needs to be adopted -jimthenglishman

--3 I'm torn. So, like Jess, I give John half a vote. ~CourtCat

--4 He blogs, he has no friends, and he'd add to that international flair. Truly, he needs some -friends. -gremlingal

--5 He's powered by an infinite number of monkeys!!! How could you not vote for him? -megaileen

--6 I vote hither. -lady leary

--7 I vote John 'cuz he put so much heart into his site; he deserves a zeduck friend.-trinapants

--8 He has my vote - W8 WHAT

--9 I vote for John - he's obviously shy but his glasses hint at a sense of fun style - plus he's a Brit - how fun is that?? - SWG

--10 I vote for this guy. He's earnest. -- snabby

--11 Here I vote.

--12 I vote for John -- he's got zetential. shabbosgoy

--13 This guy has my vote-Gingazilla

--14 He looks like Gunther. I respect that in a person -- sports_ducky

--15 I vote for this guy!

--16 My vote belongs here. He logs in frequently, put effort into his page, and has zero friends. Perfect candidate. -Everyman

--17 John gets my vote - TerenceInParis

--18 I vote for John. - pupok

--19 This guy is so in!

--20 John wins my vote, lets hope he accepts his new adoptees... ~~Green_Duckie_Shirt

--21 I'm voting for this dude! -alex

--22 He has to be the one. -- O

--23 He lives in Milton Keynes... he needs all the help he can get... Wise_Monkey

--24 My vote. I don't know how else to vote.

--25 This guy definately gets my vote. -- 14:52, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--26 Count one more vote for John

--27 OK. I'm already into his blog. So that's my vote: dot.

--28 My friendship belongs to John. He deserves it more than anyone - ljubljana

--29 I vote for john. the poor bastard.

--30 I'm also voting for John, have looked over his page and blogs and what have ya. good luck to him. -Bender (dont have any user...number...thingy)

--31 I vote for John, but I believe we need a back-up. Maybe this guy purposefully has 0 friends and so he won't accept all our friend requests. - ktrott

--32 He has my vote, but I think we need to make sure that he accepts friend requests. -bmdubya

--33 John M Baker, welcome to The Show with Ze Frank. (duckbertduckbert/

--Voting for John. His "athletic" body type and picture won my vote. I am curious about the schooling though... - megotcash

--34 Voting for John. His "athletic" body type and picture won my vote. I am curious about the schooling though... - megotcash

--35 I wanna vote john too, seems happy, cool fun running guy hahah -paleOne

--36 A 30 year old programmer... That could be me! :). TtT 17:09, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--37 i'm voting for john because jess is married. married people get to have sex, thus they do not need friends. -blissfuckface

--38 John even logged in today, and he has zippo friends, he's the perfect candidate! Cobun 17:32, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--39 Me too. He matches the criteria, plus he's geeky enough to not be terrified of all the friend requests. -ookpik, 20 December 2006

--40 john looks good. he's trying pretty hard to blog diligently. I hate to ruin things but maybe we could friend a few or all of the others. what would it hurt? maybe then they could meet each other and have a common bond. they all got "mega friended" on the same day.

--41 John gets my vote, he needs at least 1 friend.

--42 Come on, he runs on monkey power! Plus the multiple blog posts/0 friends makes him highly adoptable. Creepy Sheep 19:12, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--43 Yeah, I think this guy's the perfect candidate. I'm looking forward to his reaction. 19:32, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--44 What about this guy doesn't scream "holiday loneliness"? ( 20:04, 20 December 2006 (PST))

--45 Another vote for John. . . he needs some holiday cheer. 20:09, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--46 I vote for John! He must win! Just look at that photo -- he'll be amazed at the sudden attention. new wave dave 20:45, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--47 It was a hard choice between Jess and John, but I vote for John. geechee_girl 21:00, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--48 Yup... I went through a nerd phase once. It lasted a about 31 years. Somejeff 21:05, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--49 No witty comment, and not like it matters at this point, but this guy gets my vote, too. --Rocco 21:17, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--50 Chalk up another vote for John! -Hoekenheef 21:19, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--51 I said all I needed to say up there. -adriene

--52 powerd by monkeys, i love this guy! he blogs to nobudy about lightbulbs and has no friends. he's awsome! i totaly stole cherishes words, but this guy is total sports racer material. morae

--53 He looks like a straight shooter to me -Matt Day

--54 John may have turned down one friend request, but can he refuse thousands??? Paddington 07:26, 21 December 2006 (PST)

--55 I vote we go with this guy. 08:06, 21 December 2006 (PST)

--56 I, too, enjoy hot chocolate. I might just ask him to be my friend, even if he isn't adopted.

--57 Another for John. 10:13, 21 December 2006 (PST)

--58 Definitely John, I looked at his Myspace in the Google search before the voting started and knew he was going to get it.

--59 My wife likes the English guy, John, 'cause he's cute and a little nerdy. 12/22/06 @9:28 pm CT

6. * - päru - 0 friends

7. * - Helene - 2 friends

8. * - Brandy - 4 friends

-Her ID is 2^(3^3). How random and meaningless is THAT? A perfect candidate for adoption. Not to mention that one of her friends is named Hercules Rockafeller. I feel sorry for her already.

9. * - xMe - 5 friend

10. * - Adam - 5 friends

--1. -I really think this fella should be adopted!! Vote for him! -dreaMarie.

--2. -All need adoption, but this guys got it hands down and I don't think he'll freak out. -mystery2me

--3. -I vote for this guy. He is going to teach fourth grade. Come on, how noble is that. He needs to be adopted. -drkgv

--4. -How could you not like Adam? He's smiling in every picturee despitee spending 7 years in college just to end up teaching 10 year olds about algebra - daveconrey

--5. -I agree with the previous voters: a 4th grade teacher deserves many, many friends! -limonverde

--6. - i vote for adam! - earthangel127

--7. -I feel the nature of the adoption program is to open the eyes of someone who truly should be a lil' duckie. Adam seems like one of us. He just doesn't know it yet. -ryan

--8. -Vote for Adam! He seems fun.-axbesm_starr

--9. - I vote for Adam. Noble profession, seems cool, potentially open to friends. But for the record, if anyone else were voting for him, I totally would have gone for Janne! - 09:14, 21 December 2006 (PST)

--10. -This guy deserves it. It is cold in Minnesota in the winter.

--11. - Adam is definitely SportsRacer material- janeo 18:52, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--12. -I vote for Adam. He's going to be a fourth grade teacher for christ's sake, only torture awaits him. We should make him happy for Christmas.--jenlemen Soulsister 18:58, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--13. - Or this guy. He's got definite Sportsracing potential. Although he does specify "no weirdos"...Creepy Sheep 19:15, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--14. - I cast another vote for Adam! I have another friend who recently graduated College and is teaching Grade 7 and she's totally rad. ~helsbells

--15. - I'll vote for Adam (Another Adam) 20:09, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--16. - I vote for Adam, even though he can't spell "weirdo" 20:31, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--17. - I'll also vote for Adam - Drew, 21:24, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--18. - Yes, this guy is definitely a future Sports Racer. My vote goes here. Tedsaid 23:07, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--19. - Adam seems less desperate, but more friendly than that John guy. 23:11, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--20. - I like this dude best-- he seems super earnest. ~caroLION.

--21. - He teaches fourth grade and he draws comic books. What is not to like? My vote is for Adam. - Egregious

--22. - "No weirdos, please." He's asking for it. Duckie 12:31, 21 December 2006 (PST)

11. * - Rando - 5 friends

--1 I stopped at 11 and looked no further. This guy is the complete package. Name: Rando, Hair: Awesome, plus he looks friendly. Guys, he really need this. -juanra

--2 I think there's nobody more deserving of this than Rando Calrissian. Look at that smile! He's so friendly! -icrywolf

--3 My vote goes to Rando. Who else deserves it more?

--4 I don't think I could vote for anyone but Rando. He's exactly what we want, we just don't know it yet.

--5 My vote belongs to Rando. He has a great smile, and he at least has some friends.--Fightignorance 19:21, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--6 Rando get my vote. He is so trusting and desperate for friends that he actually "friended" the woman who posted the spam thing in his comments (the only comment he has, by the way). There is a potential language barrier. I suspect that he's from "out of town," as a former friend used to say. - peacekismet

--7 I vote Rando! He only has a few friends, and I think a few might be spambots.  :( ChaosCupcake 21:06, 20 December 2006 (PST)

--8 I really hope Rando wins. Oh man. Rando. How much better can you get. -Matt Day

--9 Randon gets my vote. He kicks ass. - 3j

--10 I favor Rando to John due the fact that he accepts friends 05:18, 21 December 2006 (PST)

12. * - LIA - 6 friends

13. * - T. - 7 friends

--1. - I vote T. So far as I can tell, she's the only nominee who likes books. Yay books. -tadd

--2. - Yep I'm with T as well - TheYann

--3. - Count another for T. I'm a fan - briank

--4. - I vote for T. She's cute as a button. I love me some buttons.- crackerjackflashdance

14.* - Northstar Republic - 7 friends

15. * - Charles - 7 friends

-Charlie, the strong vote, the vote of the people, Charlie is the peoples choice. -Eben --2. - I vote Charles. -Blibscott

16. * -Michael - 9 friends

-I vote for Michael, worthiest of all possible candidates in this best of all possible worlds. -Rar

17. * - Jay - 10 friends

-Jay is so lonely he doesn't even have votes. Courtesy vote from the "this guy" (two thumb action)!- juanra

18. * Captainbrie - 10 friends


21. * - Thomas Fagan - 0 friends

- this guy looks like he really needs something happy to happen in his life.

22. * - Sarah - 1 friend

-Vote! Since her profile is blank and i nominated her i'll list what i know about her. Just moved to new york and doesn't know anyone there. spent thanksgiving alone, will spend christmas alone. has a cat named dinosaur (its polydactl)

-Adopt Sarah! ... we can't let this opportunity go. Sarah is going to spend Christmas alone? Oh no she won't! Ze, I know why you wanted to do this. You wanted to do this so that Sarah doesn't have to spend Christmas alone. You wanted to do this so that hundreds of sports racers have the grand opportunity to make a holiday for a lonely soul. She checked her myspace again today... to think that's all she has (besides a bottomless poop box). ~ Spikku

24. * - Just Jesus - 8 friends

-So when could Bands be nominated??

-Already Sports Racer


25. * - Agador Spartacus - 1 friend

-This is a dog's myspace.


26. *

- She has dreadlocks and few friends (because Tom is not a friend, but an enemy). My vote goes here.

27. *

28. * - Evan - 7 friends,

-but please note that his best friend is a big cute bunny rabbit. Awww.

29. *

-this man needs to know about sportsracers. seriously. He needs this

30. NO URL

-Lisa needs us people...and in a way, this holiday season, we each need her.


-she seems lonely in her pictures!


-how bout this guy?

It's a Boy - Girl - Boy

Congratulations Sports Racers!

The SportsRacer Holiday MySpace Adoption Program Process Is Now Closed

All Sports Racers are now the proud myspace parents of John Jess and Adam

View The Show 12/21/06 For Details.


12/21/06 - John and Jess have replied by accepting Sports Racers as their myspace friends.

Adam has not logged in since the evening of 12/23/06. Bundles of love await thee Adam.

Comments About the Adoption

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