Talk:I knows me some ugly myspace showdown

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Please don't add your page just for the hell of it, and don't add a page that has a viewing restriction!! The point is to come up with an ugly page, and not to publish your page here just because you want attention!

The only exception is when you are so appallingly ugly yourself that it uglifies the entire page. If you really are that ugly, you can just add your space without modification. However, a better choice would be to join the Church of Scientology. They will accept your credit card no matter how ugly you are and we won't have to look through yet another boring myspace page. Thank you!

What is Ugly?

  • I'm thinking that it's not just a random collection of flashing text, stupid animated GIFs, and headache-inducing color combinations. And it *certainly* isn't posting pictures of tubgirl etc. found on the internets. Or maybe that's just wishful thinking. I know that Ze's idea is that it should drive traffic *away* from the myspace page, but I think part of the idea is that it drives it *toward* a particular destination, not that it drives your head through your monitor to make the pain stop. To that end, it should evoke the kind of morbid (and embarassing) fascination we all feel when we see Paris Hilton's charred body being taken out of a torched car. Dammit! This wishful thinking isn't getting me any closer to victory, is it? --Sford 16:13, 30 June 2006 (PDT)

pqpqpqpqpq has my vote for most annoying! -- somejeff

jonnybible has my vote for the worst! -- JonKean

So far I like vudell's best. abcd5678 is trying too hard. -- 14:08, 3 July 2006 (PDT)

  • Anyone thought of making a 'Sports Racer' Group in Myspace? ... Idle late night thought ...

  • And for you collegiate Sports Racers... a global Facebook group! (fear not... just a webhop)

  • I, for one, am disappointed that my attempt at sheer MySpace satire -- combining such nauseating effects as broken JPEGs, awful spelling and grammar, embedded sounds, CSS/HTML skeletons, opacity, clashing colors -- would go generally unappreciated. Then again, a great portion of the entrants were new MySpaces created solely for the intent of uglification. In short, what I think is that voters chose ugly (and well), but did so at the expense of ugly MySpace, which I think was the greater intent of this idea.

Ugly Ideas

Ideas to help make things more ugly

  • Have lots of broken jpegs
  • The more animated sparkle gifs. the better
  • Illegible text and overlapping text/colors is super fun for the eyes!
  • Sounds can be ugly too! Make sure to have a bad song playing on your page
  • Multiple MP3s work well too, also try to embed an MP3, Video and MIDI file -- chances are you'll get at least two to play at once.
  • Bad spelling and grammar will always win people over
  • Use the CSS cursor property on your body selector to make it look like your myspace page has crashed the user's browser.
  • Test out different opacity settings on different page elements to make your page nauseating.
  • If you're going the "myspace whore" route with all the slutty pictures and whatnot, make sure you put Jesus under both "heroes" and "who I'd like to meet." The two somehow seem to go hand-in-hand.

There are a number of sites that have code which you can use to uglify your Myspace page. If you find one post it here: Lots of "funny pics" to spam <---- ZeFrank MySpace Group

I looked at web sites returned from the search "My Little Corner of the Web". Get this: 4,660,000 results were returned. Please shut your eyes if you are a nice person. I am not. The people whose sites are retrieved by this search seem to have a lot in common:

  • They use animated graphics excessively. They do not realize that these graphics are annoying.
  • They use phrases like "Y'all come back now, ye hear!" Ummm...
  • They use exclamation marks a lot! And are excited! By the new technology! That the web offers! It is good that they are excited... but...
  • They collect things like: animal figurines, stamps, postcards, shots & cordials, banknotes, coins (foreign & US), dollhouse minis, horse related decanters, stereoviews, comics, stone spheres/marbles. They share their love of these items by displaying pictures of them, because there is nothing like aunt may's collection of micky mouse beakers!
  • They frequently have brightly colored and distracting backgrounds that make them difficult to read. This is not a loss for the average reader.
  • They feature midi sound files that start when you enter their sites. Again, they seem to not realize that these midi's are highly annoying.
  • They see the web as cosy, as a hug, as warm blanket. Awwww. For God's sake people, its just a bunch of wires, zeros, and ones.
  • They feature poetry. Bad poetry. Written by them, entailing weird interpretations of lost love usually. (I don't know why he left me, We were so very happy, Do you see what I see, He thought that I was creepy.)
  • The first few lines of most sites begin with things like:"Welcome weary traveller..."
  • They offer you weird things like coffee, a chair, a hug, a conversation... They don't seem to realize, that they can offer none of these things over the internet. Nice thought though. (I'll have have decaf half-fat latte without the cinnamon please."
  • They have names like "Dot", "Jasmine", or "Bob". Not bad names in and of themselves, but somehow weirdly appropriate.
  • They have a lot of pictures of their pets or children or both.

Also, if you have any questions ask them here:

If your page causes someone to have a seizure, do you automatically win?

How exactly is this being judged? -- 14:51, 10 July 2006 (PDT)

- its a free for all vote that happens on July 14th

Anyway I can add my page? Running a bit behind on me submission.  :<

AAAH! I'm too late! AAAH

  • got you both. Admin 21:56, 13 July 2006 (PDT)

I think alphabetizing the list of entries is unfair to the people who registered early on. The guy who was first (after Ze) is now about 100th.

  • After alphabetizing, I started at 153 to be exact when I was orginally the first person to register (after Ze). -- Popkorn

Congratulations to me ... I got 11th place. I'm the best of the worst! Courtarro 08:14, 15 July 2006 (PDT)

Courtarro, don't feel bad, you're in "Evil Homer's Top Five".

MySpace Injustices


I'm old and couldn't found where to vote. Thanks for believing in me.

- Jack the old fart.

I was given a mission by Ze to vote for the top ten today and when I go to the voting page it says "voting is closed"...Whatever should I do??? -Evil Homer

go here:

additional contestants

I don't know whether they did it because they wanted to be a part of the second incarnation of the I knows me some ugly myspace showdown, but I definitely think that is a candidate for an upcoming round. ;-)

Maybe it's just that I don't understand myspace and it's beauty ideals. But then again, that's precisely what ze was saying when he started the I knows me some ugly competition. JackH 13:52, 21 August 2006 (PDT)

Tying it together

There's a number of episodes that mention the contest, but there's no list on the page. For now, I have created Category:ugly myspace to connect everything

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