the show: 05-26-06

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Transcript

Good morning sports racers it's Friday May 26th.

Knowledge saw Al Gore speak last night and is now convinced that he needs to lose some weight. He's tubby! Oh yeah, and we need to get on that global warming thing.

In the wake of last year's devastation, New Orleans is still struggling to get back on its feet. Despite setbacks earlier this year New Orleans went ahead with a scaled-down Mardi Gras.

The New Orleans Mardi Gras is similar to its French cousin but we've added some improvements, like this tradition started by our early settlers, in which we trade worthless beads for something very valuable.

I've noticed that once a week people pay tribute to New Orleans in my neighborhood by showing off their cans.

My neighbors' cans come in all different shapes, colors and sizes. Some people show off their really big cans. Some peoples' cans are a little smaller. And some are so small you wonder if they're even worth showing off.

These cans are dirty! This one must've been squeezed too hard. This persons cans were filled with some sort of synthetic plastic material to make them look more full This person tried to hide their cans so I try to imagine what they'd look like.

It's so cool except for that one guy that tries to touch everyone else's cans!

Earlier this week the independent levee investigation team released a report that blamed Congress for underfunding the New Orleans flood protection plan for the last 50 years. State and local authorities were also blamed for failing to maintain the levees properly.

The New York Times reports that the Army Corps of Engineers has nearly completed its task of getting the levees back to their pre-Katrina condition.

The levees were in pre-Katrina condition when Katrina struck.

The US climate agency has predicted that up to four major storms will hit the area in 2006.

Ivor van Heerden, a founder of the Louisiana State University Hurricane Center said that the current system could only protect against a Category 2 hurricane. UHHH. Sounds like an emergency! Congress must be on this!

This week the House passed the Pet Evacuation and Transportation Standards Act. The bill will deny FEMA funding to state and local preparedness offices that don't have pet evacuation plans.

CNN reports that a television shot of a boy losing his dog during Katrina was the catalyst for this bill.

COOL I like pets too, so how about fast-tracking that money you set aside for people?

I think I saw television shots of people. Right?

S-s-s-something from the Comments:

Kallah writes "ZE! Are you seeing X-3? I dressed up as Phoenix! Wanna see?" Yeah right, let's have a look. Sings: This is Kallah dressing up as Phoenix! AWESOME you look just like her and you're standing so crooked! Sometimes I try to look like people I see in magazines too! Damn, that's macho.

In order to ease a stand-off between Congress and the Justice Department, President Bush seized and sealed records taken from William Jefferson's office for 45 days. The President's really good at sealing things. I wonder if he's good at hiding too. Why don't you try hiding for 45 days?

ABC News reported that House Speaker Dennis Hastert is being investigated in connection with the Jack Abermoff probe.

Hastert suggested that the White House leaked this information in retaliation of his criticism of the Jefferson raid.

Sings: re-be-de-talia-shon-shon-shon re-be-de-talia-shon

Knowledge is taking a long weekend have a great Memorial Day. This is Ze Frank, thinking so you don't have to.

Sings: Who likes the little little duckies in the pond? I do, I do, I do, a chicka quack quack.

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