the show: 06-12-06

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Transcript

Good morning Sportsracers it's monday June twelfth knowledge is on the road this week, currently Minneapolis.

(interior airplane) On sunday I flew in an airplane, it was awesome. In the bathroom they even had a fold-down table where you can pet your weird-looking duck after it made a poop. The girl sitting next to me was doing word searches. Word search is a game where your brain gets momentary satisfaction by imposing order on a seemingly disorganized array of symbols. Since my neighbor wouldn't speak to me I got bored, so I tried to impose order on my environment as well. It's amazing how much better the world feels once you reorganize it in a way that makes sense to you. Even my neighbor started making more sense to me.

(interior hotel) When I arrived in Minneapolis I immediately felt at home. My hotel room even came with two different rolls of toilet paper. I named them Optimism and Pessimism.

(dragging butt on carpet) Not sure why but Pessimism made me a little itchy.

(photos of the city) Minneapolis is where french explorers looking for the Pacific stopped and said "eh, fuck it." Then the Lutherans came. It's so great to be around so many blond white people. Being out here I finally feel like I can really express myself. I guess it just feels good to fit in. The city itself is kinda confusing. So as I walked around I tried to organize things into a way that made sense to me. I guess it's kinda like word search, but while you're doing it it's not as obvious that you're lame. As hard as I tried I just couldn't seem to find any commonalities. Except for Target, they own everything. Every time I go to Target I'm reminded of how much more I have to buy to complete my collection of everything in the world. Like this children's Cutie scratch 'n' sniff shirt. I wonder if Alberto Gonzalez has seen these. (toilet) Target has so much to offer I just felt like I should give something back. I think when I leave here on wednesday it'll feel like I'm leaving a piece of myself behind. (flower) Check it out! A flower's genitals!

Last friday was Fabuloso Friday where the show was written by you. Good job Fabulosos we'll try it again next week, just a little different details later on this week.

Holy crap on your mom's shoes! An earth sandwich has been created! Two brothers Jonathan and Duncan went on an incredible journey to complete an earth sandwich. They even documented it with video, click on the link to watch it. Jonathan and Duncan your new Sportsracer names are Megablade and the Crusher. Congratulations and welcome into the League of Awesomeness.

(clip of the earth sandwich video)

This is Ze Frank drawing a shaky pencil line around a particular group of thoughts so you don't have to.

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