the show: 06-13-06

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Good morning Sportsracers it's tuesday June thirteenth suck my soul out and replace it with Diet Coke and Grand Marnier 'cause knowledge is going to Vegas.

S-s-s-something from the comments. Prince writes: "Not just a lot of white people in Minnesota. You need to drive around take a boat out on the lakes and visit two of the best art museums in the country. So much to do and everyone is cool. Everyone." Prince, I don't think you understand what the word cool means. Going to art museums and taking boats out on lakes is definitely not cool. Being cool is about not participating in traditionally enjoyable experiences and creating the illusion that happiness can be found in alternative less enjoyable experiences. The degree to which other people around you try to emulate your alternative lifestyle and fail determines how cool you are. You're only as cool as people wish they were. Some parents co-opt the term cool and tell their kids to pursue individuality and the things that actually make them happy. (Mom's voice:) "Oh sweetie being cool is just being yourself." That's happy, not cool. Saying that everyone in Minneapolis is cool is logically impossible. On the other hand everyone I've met in Minneapolis is nice.

(Barista:) "Thanks, can I do for ya? Soup, one, please. Flower, sir. And a twenty. Four, five, five is ten, and ten is twenty. Thanks, and have a great day sir. See ya, mister Gates. Take care, sir."

That creeps the shit out of me. In New York I use how nice people are to me as a way to identify the people who are my friends, or people who are trying to sell me something. Here I just can't tell. It's hard to imagine that everyone here likes me. I mean I don't even really like me. People here are capable of expressing other emotions besides nice, I saw it during the world cup. (Angry:) "You gotta be kidding!" (Disgusted:) "Awwww!" I kinda wish people'd allow their real moment to moment emotions escape all the time. (charmer:) "I'm glad we're finally having dinner together. What are you gonna have?" (his date) "Oooh. Well I guess I'll start with an appetizer..." "Awwww!" "And then maybe just the surf 'n' turf." "Boooo!" "Actually on the other hand maybe I'll just have the pasta." "Alright! Yeahhh!"

S-s-s-something from the email. Meg sent me this easy to understand sign she photographed on the Eurostar. "If you feel a void in your life and try to solve it by having a baby you'll wind up getting divorced and slowly spiral into depression."

"Thanks and have a great day sir. See ya, mister Gates."

Don't worry knowledge'll get back to the news or the lack thereof when it gets a reliable internet connection, until then this is Ze Frank thinking so you don't have to.


Hi Ze!

I just received my "sports racer" baby doll tee in the mail! I'll be wearing it at my 5K race next week....yeah baby, that's my power move!


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