the show: 07-18-06

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Good morning, Sports Racers, it's Tuesday, July 18th, Buy a Bottle of Water for a Homeless Person Day. Knowledge says don't touch me, even intimately, cuz it's too god damn hot.

Ya feel like a big sweaty slug.

Yahoo! News reports that the heat wave that's gripped much of the US will most likely not abate until the weekend. The article reports that the organizers of the Gay Games in Chicago have asked competitors to bring extra ice and fluids to various events.

(strains and bites lower lip)

(strains and bites upper lip)

Nnnno, I'm not gonna touch that one.

The audition went great, by the way. I was so comfortable, so at ease. I decided my character should be the kind of person whose hands shake all the time. Details.

(Nervous Ze): Oh, so you lost that one.

(Angry Ze): Stupid audition.

The New Scientist reports that the body of Farinelli, a famous castrato opera singer will be exhumed for research purposes. Castrato singers had their nuts cut off when they were kids and the research aims to study what effect this had on their bodies.

I wonder what science is planning to do with this research.

Meanwhile, President Bush is studying the effects that castrating science will have on culture as a whole. The hope is that by removing things like stem cell research, science will never fully mature and start singing about God in high-pitched voices.

Yahoo! News reports that President Bush promised to use his very very first veto against a Senate bill expanding the federal funding of embryonic stem cell research. The bill hoped to circumvent the abortion issue by requiring that only leftover embryos from fertility clinics be used. These embryos would otherwise be destroyed. Stem cell research hopes to cure a variety of diseases that many of the embryos would've gotten had they given a chance to mature.

The debate of the last few days on the Senate floor made it clear that both sides of the argument hold human life in a high regard: one in its conception and the other in its continued quality.

Congratulations to soybuddha, the winner of the I knows me some ugly myspace showdown! (site preview) Send me your address and a MySpace message to claim your prize!

By the way, you guys still have to finish the design for the German kid's shirt! I made a special place in the forum for you to do it.

Yeah, I know, the President said "shit" and the Middle East is all fucked up. We'll tackle that tomorrow.

This is Ze Frank, putting his head in a freezer so you don't have to.

(Black screen background with "Fabulosos: B to E2" typed letter by letter)

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