the show: 08-21-06

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Transcript

Good morning Sports Racers it's Monday, August 21st, something from the comments day. But first, Power Moves. (cut to Casey's powermove) Casey, backflips are cool, especially if you want to impress us ladies but you have to reach inside yourself metephorically not physically with your finger to find your Power Move. (cut to Tanglepuppy's Power Move)

   "Ze, this is my Power Move!"

Now that is a Power Move! I name you Tanglepuppy.

Sports Racer Mang writes: "What should I name my new kitten? He's gray and weird enough; he smells like a pastrami sandwich." Either name him Kevin, or name him "Stop Asking Me What My Cat's Name Is And Either Get To The Point, Or Get The Hell Out Of My Apartment, I Have Enough Friends As It Is." And his last name can be "Jackass."

Shrek writes: "Ze, today is my first day of college and I don't have any friends. Any advice?" Shrek, if you don't have close friends by the end of your first day of colllege you should realize that there's probablly something wrong with you. A good place to check in is with your roommate. Using a blend of science and magic (Yes it does exist.) your college has chosen a person that perfectly matches your personality type. A great icebreaker that you can try tonight is to call a "room meeting". During your meeting you can play bonding activities like putting post-it notes on everything that's yours. At the end of the meeting, ask your roommate whether he or she considers you their best friend. If not, ask them to make a list of everything that they don't like about you, then you can spend the rest of the year trying to fix those problems.

If a conflict arises between you and your roommate don't try to settle it by talking; that's what hippies did and look what happened to them (Yes they really did exist). For example if you suspect that your roommate broke something of yours, avoid the awkward confrontation and just break something of theirs. Mastering that communication style can better prepare you for real world jobs.

And finally, be sure to tell your roommate that you talk in your sleep. Throughout the year this will let you bring up uncomfortable topics without the possibility of messy discussion.

I know college can be overwhelming at times and that's why over the next couple weeks I'll be giving you all the tools you need to succeed. And remember, be yourself, unless you're an asshole.

This is ZeFrank thinking so you don't have to.

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