the show: 10-23-06

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Now that you've mastered the basics it's time for volume 2 of the ins and outs of videoblogging.

For years traditional media, sorry - old media, no, dirty media has tried to sell us things that "looked good" and "were interesting". Luckily with the dawning of videoblogging there's a cheap and fast alternative to making media - that looks cheap and fast. While dirty media is stuck telling stories, videoblogging is about connecting with people. And what better way to connect with people than by staring and talking straight at them? Don't blink - that's one less connection you could have made.

First, some quick tech notes. Think of your camera as your friend, a friend that doesn't talk much and stands unnaturally close to you, and doesn't always come through when you need him, but, a friend.

When you're filming be natural, after all, there's nothing more natural than talking to a machine.

I said delete motherf...

Next, there's lighting. Remember God created mood lighting. There's dark mood - and light mood. Choose accordingly.

Next there's editing. Editing controls the tempo of your show. Think of it as your band leader.

[awkwardly long pause]

The most important thing to remember about editing is to cut exactly at the

Probably the most important decision you'll make is choosing your background. Remember you background is you brand. It's what people will look at when they're tired of looking at you. For example my background is a wall. That the thing that I do. That's my thing. You can't do that thing. When you choose your background try something simple and recognizable, like a dictionary, or an almanac. Remember, faces may come and go but it's your background that's gonna bring in the dough.

Although worrying too much about content is what's held back dirty media for years, a good place to start if you're stuck is to talk about videoblogging itself. Kinda like how when you're on a date it's really great to talk about how the date's going - with your date. "Do you like me?" Great! Now all you have to do is to become popular. The great thing about the web is there's no universal mechanism to track and verify statistics. Even if there was, you can take advantage of the fact that even the Nielsens don't really understand the difference between viewers, page views, hits, downloads and subscriptions. If you wanna be popular just go ahead and say you are. I call it rocketbooming. No affiliation with the website. "14 inches, really?" "No, I was just rocketbooming." Make sure to include your videoblog in every kind of subscription service that exists. The great thing about syndication is - if they subscribe you know they're watching. People might question you by pointing to publicly available statistics services like Alexa, but everyone knows they don't mean anything. For example, my show in blue has about thirty thousand viewers a day. Shown in red,, no affiliation to the phrase, has said that since March they have a daily viewing audience of more than three hundred thousand viewers. According to one blog post that doesn't even include subscribers. An additional fifty thousand come from off-site distribution channels. They even have cool little graph. I use a similar statistics program but mine comes with little numbers. At the recent Future of PR conference, they said that the numbers are still growing. That alone should be enough to convince you that Alexa is just a bunch of scribbles. So if you wanna be popular stick to your own background statistics, or "BS", and people will start paying attention. And remember, make sure AutoPlay is on.

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