the show: 11-14-06

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Transcript

(Introduction - Lab Rats Comedy from Mississippi State welcomes viewers to the show. Each member of the group says something while sitting on a stoll in front of a red background.)

[Female 1] Good afternoon s-
[Male 1] Good afternoon
[Female 2] Good morning s-
[Male 2] Sports racers
[Male 3] Sports rakers (smiles and background laughter)
[Male 4] Blah. Bleh, bleh, bleh, bleh bleh.
[Male 5] We're Lab Rats Comedy from Mississippi State.
[Male 6] And welcome to the show.
[Male 7] Ze Frank.
[Male 8] with Ze Frank!
[Male 9] (gives thumbs up Yeah!

College comedy? What did you get kicked out of the a cappella groups? Just kidding, but I bet you can do some badass short form improv. Okay so you're in Disney World and you're scouting for a major league pitcher in the style of a soap opera and one of you has bad breath. I mean... I know that's true, but also put that into the skit. Go, I expect to see thirty seconds by Friday, put it in the gallery. [1]

S-s-s-something from the forum.

Regarding yesterday's show, Imagine writes:

"Well, that was weird."

Really? What kind of weird? Like barking-at-a-bathroom-scale weird?

[Clip of Ze barking at a bathroom scale]

Or talking-a-pair-of-boxer-briefs weird?

[Clip of Ze lying next to a pair of blue boxer briefs and stroking them while saying:]
[Ze] I guess I just feel like recently we haven't spent a lot of alone time together... Are you threatening me?

Or are you talking about when pattern conversational expectations are violated and you suddenly don't have the language to deal with that slightly uncomfortable feeling that you don't really know what's going on kind of weird.

[Person 1] What's wrong honey?
[Person 2] Nothing, I'm fine.
[Person 1] Why are you being weird?

Anyways, if you thought that was weird I just got back from the League of Awesomeness Olympics, or the LOAO. Now that was weird!

[Dick] If you're just joining us, welcome to the LOAO clocking event. Rob, why don't you give our audience a primer.
[Rod] Thanks Dick, I'd like to point out that this clock has no batteries. To the casual observer, it would be broken. But for the next twenty-four hours this competitor will bring it back to life. He'll be moving the clock hands in real-time and will be scored on accuracy and style.
[Dick] Rod, I'm sorry to interrupt but we just saw a beautiful move here from Ze Frank.
(text says "Slow Motion" and a slow motion replay of Ze moving the minute hand on a clock is shown)
[Rod] Dick, it certainly was. Let's have a look at it again. Frank is a bit of a Cinderella story. He had some had some problems in the nine o'clock region. The Swiss certainly favored to win.
[Dick] It certainly is a battle of concentration and we'll be checking back in throughout the day.
(video switches to a scene of Ze stretching and warming up for "Touchy Touchy")
[Rod] Keeping an eye on Frank, we have some footage from yesterday's competitions, possibly my favorite, "Touchy Touchy." Ze's attempting to beat the world record time for touching every part of your body.
(slow motion close up of Ze rubbing his hands all over his body playing Touchy Touchy - text on the screen says "Slow Motion")
[Dick] The word poetry certainly comes to mind.
[Rod] It's certainly true, although this is not Frank's best event. Most of the women scored better despite having more to touch.
[Dick] Well Rod, not all poetry is about winning.
(cut to a black and white scene of Ze dancing with a corded phone attached to the wall - relaxing piano music is played in the background)
[Rod] If it's poetry you're after Dick, I'd take a look at Ze's best event, phone dancing.
(more phone dancing - text on the screen says "Real Time" but the video is actually slow motion - music continues)
[Dick] Absolutely, and like watching a stallion in the wild, I think we just let this one breathe.
(dancing and music continue until Ze is done dancing)

Told ya. Spreadshirt's having a five dollars off sale 'till Sunday. Just in time for Christmas.

[Male from Lab Rats Comedy] Sports r- (looks up) Shit. (background laughter)



This show's sponsors - Gimme some candy

Image:theshow-sponsor-4-0.gif    metafilter.com loves ze frank!

Image:theshow-sponsor-3-0.gif    Hate to prod, but didn't you lose a chess game?

Image:theshow-sponsor-3-0.gif    qwack. qwack.

Image:theshow-sponsor-2-0.gif    'please enter some text' it said, so I did.

Image:theshow-sponsor-2-2.gif    2 songs @ 1 jewel per = blue duck

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Image:theshow-sponsor-1-1.gif    Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud?

Image:theshow-sponsor-2-0.gif    Ze, you are amazing. Let's make out sometime.

Image:theshow-sponsor-2-0.gif    I think they are gone now. Well done.

Image:theshow-sponsor-2-1.gif    Who said the NYT never did nothin' for nobody?

Image:theshow-sponsor-2-4.gif    Hooray! Dirty Space News!

Image:theshow-sponsor-1-8.gif    There is no law anywhere.


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