zefrank - New pages [en]

breath of seth

Deflective — Mon, 28 May 2007 06:40:37 GMT

Summary:

<h4>tales from seth not yet told</h4>
 
I can't believe the things they call road signs here. Three days ago I was on my way through town to get to a Star Trek convention and I still haven't found my way out of this place.

On the bright side there's a diner here with an awesome salad (ate there five times in three days!). It almost makes up for missing out on a set of autographed Vulcan ears.

Next time I use Google maps.

---

The weather here is beautiful and the scenery is like nothing I've ever seen. It's like I'm inside a living painting but some part of me just wants to be home right now. I'm missing the pond so much.

The food is fantastic but strange. The people are friendly but they're just not you. For the first time I decided to stay in and take it easy for a couple days.

There's still so much to see but it's nice to think that I'll eventually hang up my shell.

the ORG: help/adding wishlist

Supportandcomfort — Thu, 24 May 2007 16:06:46 GMT

Summary: added no int.natl.

[[Image:orgwishlist.gif]]

Currently, only amazon.com is supported (no international sites like amazon.de or amazon.uk are accepted.)

the show: 11-16-07

Jimthenglishman — Wed, 11 Apr 2007 19:36:08 GMT

Summary: This is an incorrect duplicate of another page. There is no 11-16-07 show; it was mistaken for the 11-16-06 show.

the show: best of the show :: 05-15-06

Head-doctor — Sun, 25 Mar 2007 13:07:42 GMT

Summary:

{{theshow-transcript-header|
link = theshow/archives/2006/05/051506.html|
tags = hindsight, tired, delta|
time = 2:32|
before = 03-17-07|
current = 05-15-06|
after = none
}}

This episode has been voted the best episode of The Show with Ze Frank.

==Transcript==

Good morning [[Sports Racer]]s it's Monday May 15th. I haven't slept in 2 days and my head feels like a dog's balls. It's not really Su-- it's --- (moan) It's not really Monday, it's Sunday, Sports Racers, but I'll be flying tomorrow. In hindsight I would've booked a later flight.

([[:Category:songs|Song]])
:Hindsight is 20/20
:I shouldn't have drank that many
:Hindsight is 20/20
:Stop

:''(uh-huhhh-huhh-huhh)''

:Little elevators are far too small for me
:So I ride the big ones
:They're not so fun unless you're OCD and you like buttons
:Delta representatives put me in a room with a stranger ([[:Category:duckies|little duckies]])
:But he's no stranger anymore
:When I peed I didn't shut the door

:Hindsight is 20/20
:I shouldn't have drank that many
:Hindsight is 20/20
:Stop

Now pretend to speak French
Je-ba-ba-be-deux-me-learh-learghfeuu

Ze 1: What was the best part of your day, Ze?

Ze 2: Maybe when I was about to take off in an airplane and they said that the wing flaps didn't work.

Ze 1: Awesome!

Ze 2: Yeah, awesome and then we got to just sit there and it was hot.

Ze 1: Cool, they must've given you information about what was going on.

Ze 2: No, it was cooler than that, they played a game called Guess What's Wrong.

Ze 3: (leuuu-gh)

Ze 1: At least they finally fixed the problem when you took off.

Ze 2: Yeah, no, then they made us get off the plane and sit around for 4 hours.

Ze 1: Awesome, you love airports!

Ze 2: I sure do.

(Walking around airport)
(Footage of man transporting carts in airport) No matter how bad my day gets, this guy's day must suck, like blow chunks out of a monkey's ass suck. At least he doesn't have to clean the little testicles you're supposed to put your luggage on. I felt sorry for that guy so I used my own.

Ze 1: Then a Delta representative pictured here (drawing of penis) - oops, sorry, that's the wrong picture - pictured here (drawing of naked man pooping on other guy's head) - oops, that's not it, I guess it is this one (penis drawing), said the flight was cancelled.

Ze 2: Awesome! I bet they booked you a hotel, too.

Ze 1: Yeah, the cool thing was Delta only booked double rooms and I had to stay with a total stranger. (footage of stranger on laptop)

Ze 3: Ouuuch.

Ze 1: I'm not sure but I think Delta's motto is "Go Fuck Yourself"

Ze 2: It hurts!

This is Ze Frank. (long pause) They won't let me come home.

(Footage of man transporting carts in airport)

[[Category:songs]]
[[Category:duckies]]

The Infinite Play

Chuckm — Fri, 23 Mar 2007 05:19:58 GMT

Summary: /* PLAYers */

==Overview==

1. Take a Case containing:
* The Prop - [http://farm1.static.flickr.com/172/452531620_3ed8c09813.jpg The Quack Attack Flag]
* The Dynamic Prop (of your choosing)
* The Camcorder - [http://www.amazon.com/Pure-Digital-PSV-351-Minute-Camcorder/dp/B000FD8MJS/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/104-2789636-4571968?ie=UTF8&s=photo&qid=1174588332&sr=1-1 PSV-351]
* One Awesome [http://docs.google.com/View?docid=df4465mv_0gqxkxg Script] - written one page at a time by Sports Racers.
2. Write one page of the script. Must incorporate both props.
3. Ship the Case to a participating Sports Racer from the list.
4. Sports Racer must Perform and record script
5. Upload video to [http://www.zefrank.org/project/255/ The ORG Project]
6. Keep the Dynamic Prop and choose a new one.
7. See step 2. Repeat.

Everyone will be creating a never ending play written, performed and recorded by Sports Racers. The current person performs the script from the previous person. That same current person also determines the script for the next person. Each page of the script must incorporate the prop.

==Status==

The camera is purchased, the case is packed, and this project has legs!
At least two pages of the script have been filmed at this point. We are keeping track of who has had the camera and who is on deck below.

The project is fully funded as it stands, but if you'd like to help with postage for our overseas friends, see [http://theforum.zefrank.com/showthread.php?t=5733 this thread] for details on how to contribute.

==The Prop==
[[Image:QuackAttackFlag.jpg|240px|right|quack attack flag]]
The prop is a yellow, translucent flag with a duckie on it, as modeled by Lady Leary [http://farm1.static.flickr.com/172/452531620_3ed8c09813.jpg here]. It must be present during the filming of each page of script. It is the official flag of the [http://farm1.static.flickr.com/130/378711159_b775f046c4.jpg Quack Attack Team].

==The Dynamic Prop==

"here's an idea.

Make the static prop (such as the jolly roger or whatever), and one dynamic one. At each stop, the participant gets to keep whatever trinket, as long as they add something new. (I've got a pair of googly-eye glasses, an eyepatch, and various other toys I could part with)

Of course, this would be limited by certain ideas about taste, but provided nobody's sending any bio-hazard stuff through the mail, I think it could work, as well as add an extra dimension to the project."

-transiit

==The Camcorder ==

The camera is is a [http://www.amazon.com/Pure-Digital-PSV-351-Minute-Camcorder/dp/B000FD8MJS/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/104-2789636-4571968?ie=UTF8&s=photo&qid=1174588332&sr=1-1 Pure Digital PSV-351]. Apparently the microphone is a little weak, but picture quality has been great on the footage so far.

==Current Participants==
===PLAYers===
#[http://theforum.zefrank.com/member.php?u=4682 DangerAmy] - Oregon: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/DangerAmy ORG]
#[http://theforum.zefrank.com/member.php?u=4751 grace fell] - Washington: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/?n=grace%20fell ORG]
#[http://theforum.zefrank.com/member.php?u=4897 DaftGretel] - Oregon: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/DaftGretel ORG]
#[http://theforum.zefrank.com/member.php?u=1109 Aesahaettr] - Hanover, NH: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/Aesahaettr ORG]
#[http://theforum.zefrank.com/member.php?u=1805 MissJecka] - Boston, MA: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/MissJecka ORG]
#[http://theforum.zefrank.com/member.php?u=359 chuckm] - Brooklyn, NY: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/chuckm ORG]
#[http://theforum.zefrank.com/member.php?u=2916 Lady Leary] - Camden, ME [http://www.zefrank.org/user/Lady%20Leary ORG]

===PLAYers in Waiting===
*sk8dork - Austin, TX: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/sk8dork ORG]
*lukkucairi - SLC, UT: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/lukku%20cairi ORG]
*Creepy Sheep - Brighton, UK: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/Creepy%20Sheep ORG]
*stevegeek - Bristol, UK: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/stevegeek ORG]
*darusha - Victoria, BC: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/darusha ORG]
*brightpearl - Central, TX: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/brightpearl ORG]
*Smashing Helen, northern NJ: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/Smashing%20Helen ORG]
*transiit - southern CA: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/transiit ORG]
*rorr - Lubbock, TX: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/rorr ORG]
*SpaceAce - Atlanta, GA: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/Space%20Ace ORG]
*consumatron - Chicago, IL: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/consumatron ORG]
*Pirateboy - Atlanta, GA: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/pirateboy ORG]
*C70man - Wesley Chapel, FL: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/c70man ORG]
*blankedyblank - USA: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/Blankedyblank ORG]
*cadydidwhat - Girard, OH: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/cadydidwhat ORG]
*simon24601 - mineapolis, MN: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/simon24601 ORG]
*terenceInParis - Paris, France: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/terenceInParis ORG]
*ms_le - Minneapolis, MN: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/ms_le ORG]
*bouldasaur - Minneapolis, MN: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/bouldasaur ORG]
*gypsy sister - Des Moines, IA: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/gypsysister ORG]
*blissfork - Cali: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/blissee ORG]
*aoife - Bloomington, IN: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/aoife ORG]
*PumpkinPi - Minneapolis, MN: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/PumpkinPi ORG]
*rumoko - Brisbane, Australia: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/rumoko ORG]
*MaxPower57 - Minneapolis MN: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/MaxPower57 ORG]
*ctodd - Boston, MA: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/CTodd ORG]
*habile b - Madison, WI: [http://www.zefrank.org/user/?n=habile%20b ORG]

To become a participant, reply to [http://theforum.zefrank.com/showthread.php?t=5733 this thread] with your name, location and ORG user ID.

RTFEDDiary

Jdwpom — Wed, 21 Mar 2007 15:36:05 GMT

Summary: /* The Plan */

__FORCETOC__
==Project Info==
This project is simple, yet effective. MissJecka will buy a notebook or sketchbook, nicely decorate it and add the title to the cover. She'll write a note to Ze on the first page (we'll collaborate on this together). Then the fun starts.

Everyone (including MissJecka) will have one full page (this may change, see below) to decorate with whatever they want. It can be a short story, an autobiography, a scrapbook with pictures, a list of quotes, photos of your daily life and/or neighborhood, poetry, a journal entry of your day, newspaper articles, a drawing, a comic strip... anything you want. It can be directed to Ze or it can just be random.

Once you're done with your contribution, you mail it to the next person on the list, a fellow Sports Racer. They do the same, and it continues on around the world, from Sports Racer to Sports Racer. The final recipient will be Ze.

==To Register==
Everyone who is interested, e-mail [mailto:rtfeddiary@gmail.com rtfeddiary@gmail.com] with your full name, ORG/Forum username, and postal address.

The ORG project for this is [http://www.zefrank.org/project/236/ here]

Your addresses will be fully confidential and only used for this project's purposes.

==The Plan==

1. <strike>Get a final name for the project.</strike> 
2. <strike>Create Google account with said name.</strike> 
3. <strike>Create ORG project with said name.</strike> 
4. <strike>Have people either comment in the ORG that they're definitely participating, or e-mail the GMail account (see step 2) with their full name and address. Either way, participants have to e-mail the GMail account with their address. This will have a deadline. </strike>
5. <strike>Make new thread in The Forum going over the rules, editing them as people make comments about what rules they'd like and won't like.</strike> 
6. <strike>When the deadline passes (see step 4), compile the best route for the notebook to take place.</strike> 
7. <strike>Start a Paypal account and ask for donations to buy the notebook.</strike> 
8. Decorate the notebook, type up the official rules, write note to Ze on the first page (to be signed by everyone who gets the book), and decorate my page. 
9. Send it off to the next recipient. 

==Rules==
When someone receives the diary in the mail, they email [mailto:rtfeddiary@gmail.com rtfeddiary@gmail.com] to say that they received it, it's in fair condition, and the previous person followed the rules correctly. Then and only then will this person get the address of the next one in line to receive the diary. 

The title of the diary will be "Ride the Fire Eagle Danger Diary", with a possible subtitle to be determined later. (If you can think of a subtitle, let us know what your suggestion is.) 

Everyone has the option, when they receive the diary, to take a photo of themselves with it or of their page and post it in the ORG project. This isn't mandatory, but if you have a camera and want to show off your stuff, then take some pictures of its journey! 

==Participants==
*United Kingdom
**kempy0810
**Creepy Sheep
**stevegeek

*Canada
**darusha

*United States
**''Pilot''
**knp1968
**grace fell
**lukkucairi
**''ms_le''
**wosepedals
**kylebania
**smashinghelen
**''Awed_Job''
**TwistedOtter
**''transiit''
**DangerAmy
**consumatron
**blankedyblank
**''Space Ace''
**''simon24601''
**''DawningDay''
**eyeamelise
**MissJecka
**Aesahaettr
**Bfisch1983
**junokane
**Ramon Omar
**ugtv.org
**Jedi Knight
**ParrotEyes
**Aiofe
**Snooge
**janine13
**''pirateboy''
**typo180
**kandibugg
**Violet Hemlock
**rubyseeds
**knitmeapony
**liquidnight
**the_Wakeful
**c70man
**kylejbritt
**uncleplayground
**''chuckm''
**''BiancaInez''

*South America
**astropixie

*Oceania (''New Zealand and Australia'')
**jdwpom
**''heath''
**''rumoko''

'''Note:''' Those that are ''italicized'' live in the same town as someone else, which can be helpful in avoiding paying for postage by manually handing off the notebook. Keep that in mind!

== Notebook Suggestions ==
Not trying to be anything but unique, I think one of [http://www.boingboing.net/2007/03/23/elephant_shit_paper.html these notebooks] made from recycled material would be very cool for the final project!
[[User:Opello|opello]] 07:33, 23 March 2007 (PDT)

RTFEDDiaryRules

Jdwpom — Wed, 21 Mar 2007 15:33:34 GMT

Summary:

Sad Sad Song (song)

Rumoko — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 09:27:55 GMT

Summary: Page created

{{theshow-songlyric|show=03-17-07}}

:This is a sad sad song about leaving
:This is the price you pay when you purchase a feeling
:It's where the conversation slowly fades and you start saying
:"Hey there, do you have a ride for me?
:'Cause it's late and I've got to go to bed."
:This is a sweet sweet song about beginnings
:These are the first few words that you say in the morning
:It's when you start singing, "Hey, I'm only (insert your age here)"
:Hallelujah, it's a brand new day (a-chicka quack quack)
:Hallelujah, it's a brand new day

cherish

65.74.49.128 — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 08:09:00 GMT

Summary:

i love her.

she does not know the extent.

will she ever?

fith

65.74.49.128 — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 08:07:48 GMT

Summary:

sixth

make the next number.
follow through

third

65.74.49.128 — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 08:06:50 GMT

Summary:

fourth

first

65.74.49.128 — Mon, 19 Mar 2007 08:06:26 GMT

Summary:

second

the show: 03-16-07

212.100.250.213 — Fri, 16 Mar 2007 21:10:40 GMT

Summary: /* Transcript */ Corrected Rove name spelling

{{theshow-transcript-header|
current = 03-16-07|
}}

==Transcript==

[''Title image with Ze's voice from off.''] Thanks once again to Dewar's for sponsoring the final week of The Show and for sponsoring the build out of this archive in the weeks to come.

[''Intro by a guy on a summit.''] Aloha Sports Racers from Haleakalā Crater, Haleakalā National Park, Maui, HI, you're watching The Show with Ze Frank.

['''Ze:'''] Sports Racers, thank you for all your amazing intros throughout the year, and I'm sorry that I didn't get to use all of them.

You know what today is, but first, a little bit of housekeeping.

The Power Move Awesomeness Challenge Quack Attack is complete!

Over 250 of you entered your Power Moves. Those were whittled down to sixteen.

Hundreds of thousands of votes were cast - not kidding.

And today, we announce the winners.
* Most awesome Power Move submitted by someone who probably has male genitalia.
* Most awesome Power Move submitted by someone who probably has female genitalia.
* Most awesome Power Move in the mixed genitals category.
* In the special categories, best Power Move instructional video.
* And last but not least, best Power Move special effect.

CON-gratulations winners, I think for the moment we're safe, drop me a note and you'll have your pick of a meaningless product.

Second bit of housekeeping: although tomorrow is the last day of the show, creative mojo will keep on truckin' at zefrank.org.

If you've got some energies you want to release, come on over and check it out.

The ORG is what I call a ''social media playground'', but you might call it something different, like Nancy.

The ORG currently has more than 19,000 members, and for all you tech-geeks, it leverages over a dozen APIs.

For all you non tech-geeks, that means you can collaborate on, share and show off all that stuff you've already put up on the wild wet wild intertube.

Or find hot chocolate and a job in your neighborhood.

Over 15,000 images and 2,000 videos have already been added, and it's the home to a number of ongoing projects like
* the collaborative illustration of the Stumpy bedtime story,
* the awesome Exquisite Corpse project, and
* the neverending comic.

Anyway, I hope to see you there in the months to come.

But today of course is...

[''RTFEDD intro using stop-motion animation and sand-art. Background music starts with the beginning of Act 3 of Wagner's Die Walkure, better known as Ride of the Valkyries, and transitions to RTFEDD theme music.'']

Ohh, that was cool, let's just do one more.

[''RTFEDD intro using stop-motion animation and dot.S pixel kits from Japan.'']

Thank you Sports Racers for your all of your RTFEDD animations. You guys rock!

[''Picture of General Pace''] This week, the nations top general, General Peter Pace, [''cut to another photo''] seen here not holding hands with another man, voiced his concerns about gays in the military.

The problem according to General Pace is the gayness itself, which he called "immoral," and akin to adultery.

[''Picture of General Pace holding his index finger up, Ze speaking with strained voice''] Number one.

Although Pace later apologized for his personal views, Kansas Senator [[wikipedia:Sam_Brownback|Brownback]] backed Pace's original sentiment.

Brownback also suggested that the military update its policy from "Don't ask, don't tell," to simply: "Don't."

A good week for tolerance in America.

With a vote of 50 to 48 a Senate resolution to withdraw American troops from Iraq by 2008 was defeated yesterday.

Republicans said that the resolution would have been devastating to the American war effort.

[''Smiles encouragingly''] Yeah, I think that was the point.

After the recent scandal surrounding the neglect of wounded soldiers at the Walter Reed Army Medical Center, the Army fired General George Weightman, who was in charge of the facility.

The Bush administration said that any further investigations into how we put our wounded soldiers at risk would potentially embolden the enemy, and put our soldiers at risk.

[''Picture of Alberto Gonzales''] In the case of the fired federal prosecutors, attorney general Alberto Gonzales told the truth and nothing but the truth, except when he lied.

[''Picture of Kyle Sampson''] Earlier this week, Gonzales trying to pull a Scooter Libby, blaming his aide Kyle Sampson for orchestrating the shake-up.

[''Another picture of Alberto Gonzales''] Gonzales, seen here in a picture not taken this week, said, quote, "I was not involved in seeing any memos, was not involved in any discussions about what was going on."

[''Picture of a news website''] However, emails surfaced today that showed that he was in fact having those discussions --- with Karl Rove.

Rove. What a news hog. He's got to be in every story.

Gonzales is still reportedly waiting for the President's word...to lie down.

He's done such a good job at rolling over.

[''Picture of two sleeping pill packages''] In science, the F.D.A. has ordered new labels on sleeping pills, warning of strange side effects. The effects include: eating while sleeping, and driving while sleeping.

Technically, the sleeping part isn't that weird, it's the driving, and the eating.

Night eaters said that they woke up to find Tostitos and Snickers wrappers in their beds.

Oh my gosh, how did these get here!?

And sometimes finding in their kitchen counters overflowing with flour from baking sprees.

Stranger still was the fact that these people had no idea that they could bake.

And now, the weather.

[''Footage of [http://imdb.com/name/nm0085312/ Jack Black] (JB)''] Fluorescence. Is it fluorescence, or fluorescent? [''female voice from off''] Fluorescent.

[''Ze''] Oh, yeah, it was supposed to be fluorescent, because you're...indoors, erm, but whatever.

[''JB a little angry''] Fluorescent.

[''Ze speaking into his mobile phone''] Yeah, if you could talk to him, that'd be great, no, no, yeah, he got the line, uh, it was just a little, um, angry, and I was hoping that maybe he could look up first.

[''JB''] Is it in the script? He looks up annoyed? It is in the script. [''Pan over to woman at a desk''] I would say give it a minute, to be like, "now here's the weather," and you're thinking... [''JB from off''] Oh, alright, I got it, I got it.

[''JB, right hand on his chin''] Fluorescent. [''Exhales, rises eyebrow.'']

[''Ze on his phone again''] No, I like it, I'm just saying we should ditch the looking-up thing, 'cause that's not working, uh, but keep the raising the eyebrows, that gives a nice touch. Uh-huh, well just have fun with it.

[''JB''] I'm gonna say: Fluorescent. [''Raises both eyebrows, ...'']

[''Ze laughing''] And ''that'' is how you weather report.

This is Ze Frank, thinking so you don't have to.

the show: 03-15-07

89.57.203.51 — Thu, 15 Mar 2007 22:41:20 GMT

Summary: /* Transcript */ changed Amazon link to booksource

{{theshow-transcript-header|
time = 3m 02s|
current = 03-15-07|
}}

==Transcript==

[''Intro 1: Woman sitting on the grass with the sculpture [http://es.wikipedia.org/wiki/Floralis_Generica Floralis Genérica] in the background, which appears to be extending from the anus of a man posing in front of it.''] Arrgh! Take it out, take it out, take it out, take it out!

[''Intro 2: Scrawny guy in adult diapers crosses picture, then faces camera.''] I am the giant baby. Ohh, humiliating...

[''Intro 3: Two girls on a basketball court, speaking alternately.''] Good afternoon Sports Racers. This is Hanna and Isabell, from Baltimore, Maryland. You're watching The Show with Ze Frank. [''One girls screams and jumps at the cushioned pole of the basket.'']

['''Ze:'''] Let's play: that makes me think of. One last time.

There's a little book, called [[Special:Booksources/0394744128|A Practical Handbook for the Actor]], and playwright [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Mamet David Mamet] wrote the intro for it.

In it, Mamet says that most acting training is based on shame and guilt.

Teachers have a tendency to talk about the craft in loose mythological terms like "getting it" and "feeling it."

Not really knowing what those things are, students struggle forward anyway they can.

Gathering up a collection of tricks their teachers attention. They become ashamed that they don't grasp these undefinable concepts, and that they've developed work-arounds despite them.

Over time, they naturally become more comfortable and more experienced.

And then they're praised for "getting it," or "feeling it."

They still don't really know what that is, but the praise feels good, so they play along.

"Yes, I GET IT."

Why cast doubts or ask questions if it's working?

But, there's a sense of guilt that comes with perpetuating the mythology.

And when it comes time for them to teach, they repeat the cycle, and so on.

It's a pattern that continues, because there are no checks and balances.

Questioning it once you're in it potentially undermines your worth.

And so you remain loyal to a broken thing.

That makes me think of a story that's been in the news recently, about a group of federal prosecutors who were recently fired by the Bush administration.

The administration had the right to fire these prosecutors; they were appointed by the President and served at his pleasure. Which isn't as dirty as it sounds.

But first and foremost, federal prosecutors serve the law, and that requires a certain independence, and distance from political pressures.

In a way they're meant to represent the checks and balances of the judicial branch of government.

Prosecutors are rarely fired in the middle of a term and questions arose as to why.

Initially, [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alberto_Gonzales Alberto Gonzales], the Attorney General, said that they were fired because of job performance issues.

But in recent weeks it's become clear that they were most likely fired for not playing along, for not bowing to the political pressures that they were meant to be shielded from.

Pressures to continue the investigations into alleged Democratic voter fraud around the time of the elections.

Pressures to increase the numbers of low-level prosecutions of illegal immigrants.

Pressures not to continue investigating officials tied to the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Duke_Cunningham Duke Cunningham] scandal.

It appears they were fired for not being loyal, for questioning certain political requests.

The Bush administration has gotten much of its strength from a fierce and absolute loyalty.

The President expects nothing less. And in return, he's stood by disgraced officials until the bitter end.

But if absolute power corrupts absolutely, absolute loyalty is a pyramid scheme of that power... and ultimately that corruption.

Just imagine if your boss said that as long as you were loyal he'd stand by you no matter what.

When the shit hits the fan and things starts to break down you find yourself just being loyal to being loyal.

And if you aren't, you threaten to undermine everything.

After years of loyalty-based politics without the checks and balances of dissent we're starting to see what it's led to.

Many Republicans are now forced to ask what it exactly it was they were loyal to.

And because of that, the Republican party is said to be in a state of disarray.

In contrast, the Democrats, for the moment at least, appear to have a certain unity.

Personally, I hope that that unity has room for dissent.

That isn't based on some abstract notion of party loyalty.

Both sides are vulnerable to the same forces, and given the alternative, I'll take disarray loyalty that's absolute.

This is Ze Frank, thinking for me.

[''Black screen.'']

[Ze:] I'll see you on Ride the Fire Eagle Danger Day.

And just a reminder: Tomorrow is the last day to get most of those [http://www.zefrank.com/theshow/shirts/ meaningless products].

[''Sucks in air''] Ssssclah.

the show: 03-14-07

87.194.115.207 — Wed, 14 Mar 2007 21:29:52 GMT

Summary:

{{theshow-transcript-header|
current = 03-14-07|
}}

==Transcript==

[''Intro by a girl making up her lips, and painting a curly mustache on her upper lip.''] Good morning Sports Racers, and treasure this last week of The Show with Ze Frank.

['''Ze:'''] I'm a bit sad today. [''starts to smile''] Just kidding!

Geeez, it was getting a bit heavy. It's springtime!

Springtime is where people in the north-east look at trees and bushes for signs of their impending genitalia.

And people in L.A. look at shop displays for signs of impending new collections.

Like after a long cold it's that point where your sense of smell comes back. And everything smells pretty, huh.

Springtime is where I get a new sense of empathy for the world and its creatures.

[''Footage of Ze standing next to a tree on the sidewalk''] For example today I realized my shadow must get very cold. I always seem to be blocking its sunlight.

[''Ze spreading his arms, his shadow cast on a t-shirt and pants lying on the sidewalk.''] In the spirit of springtime, I decided to spend a few minutes each day warming my shadow up. I felt a little badly for other people's shadows. Some people just don't get it. But I found that if you stand there long enough, some people start asking how they can warm their shadows, too.

Sa-sa-sa-something from the fo-rum.

[''Cut to forum post''] ''beowulfkg'' writes: consumerism; what itch are we trying to scratch?

[''Ze standing in the kitchen washing a glass in the sink.''] You know what, ''beowulfkg''? I might not be the right person to ask. Because I'm not into it. I'm not into -- ''consumerism''. [''Looks into camera''] Disgusting. When people consume. And not only am I not into it, actually trying to prevent it. Sometimes I buy two, or three, or four of something, so nobody else can consume it. You know, "I'll have two appetizers, throw one in the garbage. I don't even wanna see it. But don't let anyone else consume it." [''looks back to sink''] Oh crap, huh, I almost got my Brookstone weather doo-dad wet.

Although I try not to consume, it would be unrealistic to say that I never do it. Sometimes I find myself at theme parties and other people are doing it.

But if I do, I take a hint from the native Americans. If they chop down a tree, they'd use every part of it. The wood inside for fire. The bark and leaves for clothing.

[''Voice from off, while Ze is drinking a yogurt, saying hello to the empty package, and re-enacting a rocket take-off with it.''] So on the rare occasions that I do consume, I try and do the same thing. Trying not to waste any single part of that thing, that, uh, I was forced to consume.

I even could use this little bit of cellophane, to make a ball. [''Makes cellophane ball and presents the ball to the camera.'']

And it wouldn't stop there. For every tree they'd chop down, they'd plant a new tree. So for that yogurt-on-the-go I just consumed, I bought another one and put it on the street.

the show: 03-13-07

12.130.3.100 — Tue, 13 Mar 2007 19:15:31 GMT

Summary:

{{theshow-transcript-header|
current = 03-13-07|
}}

==Transcript==

Messages from the Sportsracers

1.
Hi Ze and all the other Sports Racers, this is [http://theforum.zefrank.com/member.php?u=1712 consumatron]. I'm not really sure how to put into words all the appreciation I feel for the last year, so I salute you in the most awesome way I know how. (Stands with his arms upright, jumps and crosses arms and lands sticking arms out to the sides) Thanks for the awesomeness everyone.

2.
This is Alan from San Mateo California, and I just wanted to thank all the Sports Racers fer... just raising the bar and being smart an... (fumbles)

3.
(Smiling guy in the dark, just blinking)

4.
(Guy sitting making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich) Hello Sports Racers, this is [http://theforum.zefrank.com/member.php?u=4253 transiit]. I want to thank all of you for making the past year so much fun. Everyone on the forum, everyone on the ORG doing creative stuff. Everyone who showed up for movie night.Thank you. Thank you Ze. (Puts Peanut buttered bread and jellied bread on his face) I feel happy.

5.
(Two guys staring into the camera, smiling...finally they scream wildly)

6.
This is [http://theforum.zefrank.com/member.php?u=2395 shabbosgoy], and I just want to say "Hi" to Ze and all my not-friends on the forum. Thanks for everything. (3-headed blue dragon puppet enters the shot)

7.
This is the closes to poignant that I can get in 15 seconds, but everybody, whatever brief recording you've made, whatever you've said, don't let this be the only time in your life you have a real chance to make a statement to so many individuals with so much potential to have your message openly received.

8.
Hard Charger attack! (puppie chewing on a ducky, making squeaky noises) Attacking the little duckies! (Dog chews some more) Ok, Photon. (hand reaches to take the ducky from the puppy) Thank you!

9.
(Photo of two people hugging) Allison and I used to joke that we were psychic. After six years apart we realized that we had both independently become Sports Racers. After we each tried to take credit for introducing the other to "The Show."

10.
(Guy with the camera on him, spinning around) Hey Sports Racers, thanks for making the earth a sandwich, and for keeping the mayonnaise out of my queue.

11.
To my fellow Sports Racers: I just want to say, "Poop!"

12.
pop-pop-pop-pop-pop-"Poop"-pop-pop-pop-pop-pop-"Poop"

13.
(woman following a pigeon, saying something)

14.
(Hand takes a notecard that says "Watch Ze" off a pinboard. Then feels the emptiness longingly) *Sigh.*

15.
(Boy plays with a tennis ball hanging from a string, tosses it away, and it comes back and bumps into his head. Smiles)

16.
Budgeting Lesson #42: (woman in a chair, 2 children doing her hair) You want a new hairdo, but you can't afford a beautician, so ask your kids for help! (smiles and gives 2 thumbs up)

17.
(Girl looking down, laughs)

18.
Hi this is [http://theforum.zefrank.com/member.php?u=1164 catman], thanks for all the wit, the comedy, and teaching us how to do the monkey dance, its something I can use at my job.

19.
Hi Sports Racers, this is [http://theforum.zefrank.com/member.php?u=396 BiancaInez], and I want to thank each and every one of you, but especially those of you who have become my true friends, real life friends. Thank you. Thank you for teaching me how to believe in myself, and reminding me how to hope.

20.
Don't be dismayed at goodbyes, Sports Racers; a farewell is necessary before meeting again, and meeting again is certain for those who are friends.

21.
(a duckie) Good morning Sports Racers! (face talking) I will always remember <t> one line at a time Haikus.
Friendly bonds melt fast
In the winter of the show
Farewell Sports Racers
See you around the sandwich! Smiling Sarah, Double-O One.

22.
(Kid giving 2 peace signs)

23.
(singing) Who like the little duckies in the pond? I do I do I do a chicka quack quack quack. (talking) Hey Sports Racers, how was that internship? Was it a life-changing experience? Did you get a new "skill set?" Did you play well with others? Before it's all over, make sure you thank those who guided you along the journey. I hope you all keep those creative juices flowing, and I'm gonna finish by saying I Double-Duck Dare ya. Allow yourself to be wrong. Ou Revoir. *SMOOCH*

24.
Thanks for doing all the funny things, and, um, I feel kinda bad that this is going to end soon.

25.
Mary had a little lamb, his foot was black as soot. And into Mary's bread and jam his sooty foot he put.
Old Mother Hubbard went to the cupboard to get her poor daughter a dress. When she got there, the cupboard was bare; and so was her daughter I guess.

26.
(guy holds his fingers like a gun, smiling) Gimme all your money. (another guy wraps his hands around his head) (laughs)

27.
(blank white screen) Dear Ze, and the rest of the Sports Racers. This is [http://theforum.zefrank.com/member.php?u=3806 Convict24601]. I just wanted to say thank you, I'm going to miss you all. This has been one hell of a conversation and one wacky and fun ride. Take care.

28.
(People roller blading)

29.
Hello new viewer, and welcome to "Flawless Pickup Lines." Are you tired? Because you've been running through my head all day. Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven? I have an erection. Are they gone yet?

30.
(Guy drinks Sierra Mist, scowls and snaps his fingers)

31.
Hi Sports Racers, this is Wombat, and he only says Two things (grumble) Would you like a cheese sandwich? Is that an avocado?... Smile!

32.
Hi Ze. Originally I was going to show you a video of my friend Lauren, shown here, calling you a bitch; I don't know why. It's just the way she is I guess. But for some reason my video isn't working. So I guess you'll just have to read her lips. Hm. Enjoy. Greetings from Kansas. (video of Lauren)

33.
Define Ze. Zed. Ze. (laugh) Trendy fashion? Trendy vacuum fashion. He actually helped me hire a web developer. Hi. That was Steven. He's working out just great. Thanks Ze.

34.
(guy looking at ducky) Mew? Ngwack.

35.
Hey man, where you been, this place is a mess.
I know, I've been spending all my time catching up on that video blogger guy. You know.
Ze Frank.
I just hope he doesn't sell out.
Whatever, what's his name?
Ze Frank!!

36.
Hey everybody. Remember the human baton? That was a lot of fun for us. You know what else is a lot of fun? BWAAAAA (vomits out the scrabble tiles to spell "THANK YOU ZE FRAN" and moves the "K" to spell FRANK) One Two three. (Step, swing arms x2) Aaaaahhh.

37.
This is Adam from Knoxville Tennessee. Ze, thank you so much for The Show, and Sports Racers: You can do anything you want. Remember that.

38.
Hi I'm Nickapanda from the ORG and I'd just like to say thank you Ze for making The Show, I hope you come back, We're sad to see you leave. Lukukari for putting me in the thinking video, Joko for being in The Show. So long and good night.

39.
Just keep on riding that fire eagle Sports Racers, no matter what day it is: Danger or not.

40.
Blub blub

41.
Why not? That's very interesting. That makes me think of

42.
(GUy with glasses on, dances to music in snippets. Woman takes a duck out of a present on his crotch) Duck.

43.
Ze! Hindsight is 20-20. I shouldn't of drank that many. Hind sight is 20-20 Stop. We'll miss you Ze. Bye Ze! Bye!

44.
A Message from [http://www.zefrank.org/user/panzyfaust Panzyfaust]: So after many iterations and then realizing just how short 15 seconds is I think I've deduced it to this; I can't duly express how much you've inspired and taught me over the last year. So Ze and Fabulosos, thank you.

45.
(Guy gives peace sign and mouths the following words: Peace out Sports Racers.)

46.
Mark Twain said, "Keep away from people who belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you too can become great." Thanks for being really great, Ze.

47.
I wish it didn't have to end so soon. You did a great show, Ze. See ya 'round, Sports Racers.

48.
(singing and on guitar) (D) Who likes all the Sports (A) Racers in the pond? (G) I do, I (A) do, I do, (D) a chicka quack quack.

49.
(guy drinks from a pink cup, looks around) Despite popular belief, I think life is beautiful. And I wanted to thank you, Ze.

50.
Bye Ze from duckies in the pond. A sugar quack quack.

51.
Ze and the Sports Racers, thanks for helping me kick the brain crack. *pop*

52.
To Ze I would just like to say thank you for being so awesome and making me feel so happy inside. To the Sports Racers I would like to say EEEEE (waves, makes silly faces)

53.
Hi Ze and all you Sports Racers. This is Jehoshaphat saying thanks for all the laughs, for helping me get rid of some brain crack, for showing me the potential of an internet community, and for chicka quack quack. Ze, have your agent call my agent. We'll do lunch. Peace out.

54.
And remember: If you want to save the world, you're gonna have to push some old ladies down some stairs.

55.
Sports Racers, here's to light-hearted critical thinking and making the world a more awesome place for ourselves and our kids. And Ze, thanks for the spirit. You - This - is part of what's right with the world. As you go to the big leagues, remember: you have no small power. Use it.

56.
11:45 on Sunday night, 15 minutes to deadline, trying to think of something important to say in 15 seconds, all I could think of is: "Thanks Ze Frank."

57.
Sports Racers, I'm okay, you're okay. We'll all miss Ze, and that's okay.

58.
Hi. This is Mark D. And I'd like to thank Ze and the Sports Racers for making something special and letting me be part of it.

59.
(2 Lady sports Racers exchange a duckie and hug, then show a sign that says: Buck up, Sports Racers. Let's USE this momentum!)

60.
(Guy holding cards that say: "My mic is dead... Thanks Ze... Thanks to all you Sports Racers, I'll miss this, *HUGS* (non-creepy)" then waves goodbye)

61.
Thanks, Ze, for an amazing year. And thanks, Sports Racers for being so awesome.

62.
Hey Sports Racers. It's Old Grimy. I'll look forward to seeing you on Saturday. St. Patty's Day! I'll be a Leprechaun. I'll be carrying these. (holds up gold coin.)

63.
Hey Sports Racers. This is Phoebe in Berkely, California. Thanks for the connection, art, and community. I look forward to rockin' the ORG with you. Thanks for everything, Ze...for thinkin' so I didn't have to. (pause) crap, now I have to think.

64.
Sports Racers. (begins pointing to spots on a global map.) Made an Earth Sandwich. Bought some kid in Germany clothing, and made holiday songs. I didn't. Good luck, Ze. I wish I was there from the beginning.

65.
(Text: Daisy May The Worst Cow, EVER!)) Do Cow's say moo? (Dog says MOOO. "We'll... Miss you... Ze." Text: It's been fun. Come back and play again sometime!

66.
Oh hi. We had some good times, eh sports racers? I don't feel so silly knowing that hundreds of you did this too. This is Andrew Bolvert, dressing up a vacuum cleaner so you don't have to.

67.
Hi Ze, this is Jeremy, um, and I just want to tell you thank you for the show and I hope that everything goes well for you in the future and good luck with everything. Take care.

68.
(Japanese music, and a guy weearing different outfits, of which a gas mask features prominently.)

69.
Hola Sports Racers. Me llamo Caballo. Y mi hermano es <resandiar> Y tengo arbon de aste mis manos. Por favor, cuan tengan sear <alledear> de las puertas. Hasta luego.

70.
It's a great, big dirty world sports racers. But let's stay true to our selves. Good luck.

71.
This, my friends, is known as the magic hour.

72.
Scientists and artist do the same thing. They both ask questions and try to answer them. Now that the show is coming to an end, where are you headed? The lab, the studio, the theater? All I know is, I'm headed for the world. It's all of the above. I hope I see some of you sports racers out there.

73.
Here at the <Ausfurd> labs we have a template to breed the perfect Corgie: The one able to say "The Show with Ze Frank." Thus far our- all our efforts have failed. She only goes "WOOF"

74.
Hey, how ya doing? this is Brian from [http://www.thebigthings.com The Big Things]. Quick message to all you Sports Racers out there. (shows pictures of rubber animal noses) Don't wear those rubber animal noses. They're really stupid. (shows a woman with a duck nose surrounded by hearts) Except for one. Alright, stay awesome everybody.

75.
Thanks Ze, I learned more from you than I did from my teachers.

76.
We can't do what Ze does. We can do what comes easier for us. And we just have to figure out what that is. No. Ze is funny. I'm not funny.

77.
There's so much pressure, 'cause we're supposed to be in the league of awesomeness. I just want to do something really awesome. (jumps) Now that's awesome.

78.
Hi. I'm Thomas J. Brown of A Life Less Ordinary dot com, on the ORG as M W Productions. Ze, thanks for the past year. And Sports Racers, stay awesome.

79.
Well, this year has been quite "Paradacular"
Indeed.
So I was watching Ze this long time
And we have realized something. Ze has showed us how to ____ without blinking or any real point.

80.
Hi. Wanted to think of something witty to say inkeeping with "The Show with Ze Frank," but I couldn't so... Thanks all for sharing and... "Something Witty"

{{incomplete-transcript}}



Bye Ze, see you in the big show!

the show: 03-12-07

24.147.123.94 — Mon, 12 Mar 2007 22:29:23 GMT

Summary: /* Transcript */ removed line break

{{theshow-transcript-header|
current = 03-12-07|
}}

==Transcript==

[Intro: girl standing at bottom of [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eiffel_Tower Eiffel Tower]] Bonjour Sports Racers... et bienvenue au Show... avec Ze Frank!

['''Ze:'''] I feel weird today. Bittersweet.

I'm happy... because, in case you haven't noticed, [[Wikipedia:Dewar's|Dewar's]] has agreed to sponsor the final week of the show. But maybe more importantly has agreed to sponsor the building of a proper archive of this place.

And I very much appreciate having something to work on next week.

But I also feel weird. Probably because it's the last week of The Show. And I so badly want to make something that you'd like.

I'm in Austin, Texas right now, at a festival called [http://2007.sxsw.com/ South by South West].

It's actually three festivals: film, music and that red-headed step-child, interactive.

That's the one I belong to.

The streets are teeming with people. And the mechanics of their daily lives that have brought them here are vastly different.

Some have sweated their way here in small rock clubs in Wisconsin.

Others have spent bare-foot nights in editing rooms eating Doritos.

And some have been cradling a laptop like a baby for years.

Despite these vast differences in the day-to-day there's some sort of an implied unity here. And that unity seems to be found in that word, 'creativity'.

I'm amazed we have one word that can apply to all these different things.

A word that evokes wonder when I think about what other people have done.

But evokes fear and self-doubt when I think about myself.

Some people think of it as a born-in attribute like big hands and big feet.

Some people think of it as infrequent visitations from an other-wordly muse.

Some people think of muscle that can be built up and trained.

And many people don't think about it at all.

Sometimes I think about confidence, what it takes to get from zero to one.

It seems like what you think about creativity can affect that confidence.

There's [http://www.amazon.com/Handbook-Creativity-Robert-J-Sternberg/dp/0521572851/ a book edited by Robert Sternburg that deals with psychological research into creativity].

One of the articles says that one of the only reliable indicators for increased creativity (however they measure it) is a person's belief that creativity is something that you can work on, and change.

Confidence about gaining confidence.

For me that's the interesting battleground: fighting against things I don't think are possibilities.

Not with the goal of having an inflated sense that you know you can do something.

But instead just to get that glimmer of hope of possibility. To move from zero to one.

Those battles of confidence are what make that word 'creativity' so terrifying for me.

And it's interesting to see how they play out in different professions.

Artists like [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twyla_Tharp Twyla Tharp] and [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anne_Lamott Anne Lamott] seem to have confidence in their ideas, but they battle with habit, with the regularity of their work.

Business people seem to be confident with doing things every day but they battle to stretch out their ideas.

Just finding the battleground seems to be a step in the right direction.

I'm interested in this flip from zero to one, this confidence to start things, because I look at creative projects like they were [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sudoku Sudoku] puzzles.

You can stare at them as long as you like but you won't suddenly see all the numbers.

You have to start. You have to find one box to fill in.

And from that, another one reveals itself. [blink]

You might not be able to solve all of them; but as long as you know it's possible, you'll keep trying.

And no matter how many you solve, each new one begins with a bunch of empty spaces.

Zero to one.

Bittersweet.

Stinky Nipples / Turd-blossom (song)

64.214.120.210 — Mon, 12 Mar 2007 18:32:00 GMT

Summary: /* Stinky Nipples */

{{theshow-songlyric|show=11-13-06}}
== Stinky Nipples ==

:Stinky nipples, everybody put your fingers on your stinky nipples.
:(Jalepeno)
:Stinky nipples everywhere.
:(Mmm, so stinky)

:Nipple one, nipple two, sometimes three.
:Nipple one, nipple two, which one stinky?
:Nipple one, nipple two, sometimes three.
:Nipple one, nipple two, which one stinky?
:(Whoa, I don't know)

:Stinky nipples, everybody put your fingers on your stinky nipples.
:(Jalepeno, Mmm)
:Stinky nipples everywhere.

== Turd-Blossom ==

:Turd-Blossom, I hope you're fairing well.
:I hope that your aroma counteracts the smell of
:That shit that you grow on.
:Turd-Blossom, I hope you're fairing well.

the show: 03-09-07

87.194.115.207 — Sat, 10 Mar 2007 04:20:32 GMT

Summary:

{{theshow-transcript-header|
current = 03-09-07|
}}

==Transcript==

[Ze v/o splash screen:] Thanks to godaddy.com for their continued support for the show. Enter code FRANK from the link in the sidebar and get your .com domain name for $6.95 a year.

[Intro] Good morning Sports Racers. This is the American Museum of Natural History and you're watching The Show with Ze Frank.

['''Ze:'''] Somebody else sponsored the show - you did.

[Ze, giggling] Holy-crap-in-my-mom's-brand-new-boots, look at all the candy.

Thank you very much for your support throughout the year.

That's it for [http://www.gimmesomecandy.com gimmesomecandy] on the show but [http://www.blip.tv blip.tv] has agreed to take it over.

That means you can make stuff and people can give you candy.

Give them a few weeks to set it up but it's nice to know gimmiesomecandy'll still be around.

Also, as the chairs get flipped up onto the tables most of the [http://www.zefrank.com/theshow/shirts/ meaningless products] will be gone by next Friday.

A couple might stick around, but let's not dwell on that: it's Ride the Fire Eagle Danger Day.

Mr. Philosopher, could you give us a quote on being human?

Err... let's see... to... err... is human...

Thanks. Got it.

Whu?

The shipping company DHL doesn't just stand for 'deliver'. It apparently stands for d'head and d'liver.

[laughs & groans] I'm sure somebody else got there first.

A resident of Grand Rapids, Michigan, received and opened two packages: one containing a liver, and the other a partial human head. The packages had originated in China. DHL said the delivery was a mix-up.

In other news, a Chinese Mob Boss was confused this week after receiving a package containing the book [http://www.amazon.com/Tuesdays-Morrie-Young-Greatest-Lesson/dp/0307275639/ref=pd_bbs_1/104-4166464-8049544?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1173546392&sr=8-1 Tuesdays with Morry] and an iPod, following several phone calls saying he should expect a quote 'special delivery'.

While the US struggles to find evidence of North Korea's alleged uranium enrichment programme, some dude in Germany kind-of had the opposite problem.

For the last ten years he's been telling German authorities that he got his hands on some uranium pellets and buried them in his back yard.

They didn't believe him. But it turned out to be true.

A little comforting bedtime story. About radioactivity.

The Bush administration has vowed never to speak to that man, and his name has been added to the axis of evil. In all caps.

Although possession of uranium is a crime in Germany he will most likely not go to jail, because he turned himself in.

And that's why you always tell the truth.

Presidential candidate John Edwards had a rough couple of weeks, most recently being called a bad name by respected journalist, American sweetheart and known philanthropist Ann Coulter, seen here holding back the hounds of hell.

Edwards, seen here welcoming the kittens from heaven, was shocked a couple of weeks back to find his virtual headquarters within Second Life trashed.

His virtual office was reportedly plastered with virtual Marxist and Leninist posters and a faeces-spewing obscenity. Whatever the hell that is.

It was assumed that the attack was the work of some Republican eHoodlums.

However, in a comment on Edwards' blog the eTerrorist group Patriotic Nigras ''[note: likely a pseudonym for the internet troll group known as the GNAA]'' took credit,

Adding that they weren't Republicans, and saying quote 'sorry we broke your intertube campaign Mr Edwards'.

Yeah. It's getting weird.

Finally, the Associated Press reports that a group of Mayan priests will purify a sacred archaeological site after President Bush visits next week.

They'll be doing that to eliminate bad spirits. Left behind by him.

He was young, it was a party in Vegas... he might have picked up a coupl'a bad spirits.

But that's okay. He's a bridge builder now.

Quick cuts and silly news. Have a great weekend, this is Ze Frank, thinking so you don't have to.

Oh, right, and the deadline for the short personal messages for Tuesday's show is this Sunday.

Send them to the email address in the sidebar.

Mwoah.

{{theshow-transcript-sponsors|
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|4|0|Please don't go!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|4|0|All I can say is thanks, Ze. You've been wonderful}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|4|0|Thank you for your generosity. Loves -More Puppies}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|4|0|One last hurrah; for the man who wins the internet}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Resist Fluoride Plot!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|i'll give you $50 bucks to keep vloging....please!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Ze, S&C, you've helped us all:Know Thy Self, TY!!!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Thanks Ze for the year!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|You have changed my life for the better. <3, AC}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Come visit Seattle sometime, Ze!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Thanks, Ze. And I <3 U, Papa Bear.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Kris - our bare asses looked good. Dan-o}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|yay!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Don't disappear.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|I'll miss you both, Ze and Tim! Thanks, Ze!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|I'm indebted for what you've given. --transiit}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|you had me at 'chicka-quack-quack'}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|cuz you can't have too many duckies...thanks ze!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|here's putting a price on laughter}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Many thanks Ze, 4 the daily knowlege & inspiration}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|thank you Ze - from Meg and Mog}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|thanks ze}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|have some change, monkey. and thank you. - rumoko}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Thank you Ze. You rock.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|aw shucks ... i think i'm gonna cry}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|I'm going to miss you, Ze. So much. -- Magnus}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Thanks for a great year. I'll miss you.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|ze, you will be greatly missed. Pawling loves you.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Thanks for a great year, Ze. Scrabble, anyone?}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|(hearts too. but thanks for removing my blindfold)}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Thanks for the great year!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Thanks for the laughs and tears. Magical. AdamG}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|DON'T_GO!!!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Thank you, Ze.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Ze... Thanks for a great year... OzBoy (Brooklyn)}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|thank you, ze, for making us smile..we hart u..h&d}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Danka Ze-make us proud on the boobtube or wherever}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Who will raise our giant baby now?}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Amontillado and DataVortex forbid ending the show!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Wherever you go next, keep up the awesome}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Thx from a former brain crack addict!- gaijingirl}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|ze silent scowling standing still is sorta scary}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Rob Z. and all at TechKnowMe will miss you, Ze!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Worst 'Repelling An Audience' Ever.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Your the best Ze! Thank you.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|I'm off brain crack. Thanks Ze. -- Colin.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Quack Quack my little duckies! Smell you later Ze}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Thanks. You lifted me up this year. Keep in touch.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|the magnet people: thinking for themselves. thanks}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Damn. One less thing to distract me from work...}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Thank you so much - the people at Since The War}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Vielen dank, Ze, wir werden dich vermissen. M Ente}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Thanks Ze.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|It's been a wild ride. Thank you!!! *OtterHuggles*}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Ooooh I'm a duck... do marmots eat ducks?}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|thanks ze. the show is duckin' awesome.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|NPR&The Show.All the media I need.Thx Ze, BritBoy.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Why do things have to change? <3girlie_sportsracer}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|thanks Ze. heart, kt}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|We'll miss you too.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|You made me happy 5 minutes a day for a year. KTG}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|i shall cry the day the quacking dies...}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|I'll miss the little little duckies in the pond...}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|omnia mutantur nos et mutamur in illis}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|thanks for a great year! keep it up!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Ze - thanks for the good times, best of luck}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Putting my money where my mouth is - great work!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|wowww}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|rahhdhdhdhewer}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thanks Ze, it's been great fun. -d}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thanks Ze, it's been a great year.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|I've been a viewer since august. I'll miss you-JZ}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|stay.....I'll be your bitch}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Everything will be okay. Shut up. Yes, it will.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|and that is how that is done. amazing.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|6|I'm gonna miss the show!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|6|Trust yourself and your talent.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|Be well.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|for zay and my genitals. thanks britt, hi matt! rp}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Thanks, Ze. I'll miss you.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|4|Thanks for a great year!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|7|Lindsay in WY doesnt know what she'll do without u}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|Hey Ze, thanks for being on the show!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|4|sad it's ending, grateful for the fun-thanks, Ze!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|ah crap this is the last one}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|though I am broke, you have fixed me, thank u Ze}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|4|I'll miss you too! - Tiare}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|I'm poor but you make me feel rich. Thank you, Ze!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thanks for a wonderful year, Ze... Inspiring! ts}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|Oh please don't go we'll eat you up we love you so}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|1|('\(^_^)/') bear huggles for Ze}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Ze, you're amazing. This one's for you, sauce.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Thanks for everything Ze - Cmar}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|1|Thanks for the daily smile, Ze}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thanks for all your genius work! - bradical}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Bittersweet, but so much fun. Thanks, Ze. Athenor}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Going to miss you ze, thanks for the shows!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|Bye, Ze! Stay in touch, k? Love, ChaosDigest}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Quack!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|I do. I do. I do. A chicka quack quack. (Ze too)}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|4|Thanks Ze}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|8|Thanks for hours of distraction from med school}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|You go Ze!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|3|All Hail Stan?}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thanks for everything -Inty (now dance monkey!)}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Now who's gonna think so I don't have to?}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Peace Ze}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Wish I could give more candy Ze! Awesome! scuzrulz}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|thanks Ze}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|oxgenmassagetherapy.com $20 off for sports racers}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|So do I get laid now that I've bought a duckie? <3}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|thanks for the show}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|'Use Magic Duckie Luck to Help me get that Job!'}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|4|time to fly, lil duckie. bless you, ze.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|Tyler, I knows me a perfect brother! Thanks Ze!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thanks, Ze.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|You've given me purpose the past year - Thanks!!!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|candy duckie, youre the one!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|1|thank you ze. stay awesome! :D vagranting.com}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Looking forward to what's after the show -yischon}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Ze, you are a gentleman and a scholar thanks -K&T}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|So long, and thanks for all the duckies.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Man, I'm going to miss this.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|I'd like to thank the LoA for this duckie.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|'Why does everything have to change?' :-( Miss ya!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|piyo piyo}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|it has all been said}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|best of luck on future missions - badasstronaut}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|mattburnsey.com is gonna miss you!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|Some last minute panic candy. I'll miss you! ~kit}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|Ze, thank you for an amazing year. -Ilias}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|What am I saying? You'll still be around! ~kit}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Wish I could give more, Ze. You gave us all more.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Great job Ze. $10 is ripping you off!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Words fail. Thanks for being so awesome. --Aaron--}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|To all my friends i love you -Adrian DuMay}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|A candy duckie for ze... --jeremy}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|2|a chicka quack quack.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|If I show you my power move, will you stay?}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|Now who will think for me? Thanks-devansdesign.com}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|3|Just trying to show u some luv - thanks Ze!-d@v!d}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|1|what will happen The Day After?! thinking, i think}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|a yellow duckie....}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|--.- ..- .- -.-. -.-}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|You were awsome ze!!!!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|www.stretcher.org will miss the show. Thanks Ze!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thanks so much, Ze (MNBM). We'll miss you. - Ian}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Ze, always remembarrr, Pirateboy's got yer back!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|I'm priviledged to have been a tiny part of this.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|3|Thanks Ze! from ]]] Creative Slice [[[}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|3|]]] and Tim [[[ from Tucson, Arizona!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|4|Chrissy and Dave will miss The Show. Thanks Ze.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Ze, you're my hero. Really.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Duckie blue, very sad, ur the best Ze I ever had}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|thanks for your candy of awesomness frank}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|4|pink duckies are the awesomests_thank you ze. LELE}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|7|I'm the guy who suggested the peanut butter, btw.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Duckie blue is so sad your the best Ze, I ever had}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Quack from Chionsas =) It was an awesome ride..}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Have a cool summer oh, and thanks :)}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|See you on the other side}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Many thanks Ze, from a couch in London...}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Thanks from Wdi!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|an amazing year of the show! thanks Ze}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|the duck abides}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|will miss my daily fix... :-(}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|1|Can't believe your really going. Say it ain't so!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|how strange, O how funny & strange -Czeslaw Milosz}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|We'll all always be new viewers for you, Ze.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|so far, so good.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Thanks for sharing the awesomeness, Ze!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|1 last duckie. i'll miss the little bastards -Loki}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thank you Ze. Go forth and let more awesome out.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|4|Ze- Thanks for a year of daily joy! - Viola Zuppa}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thanks for the knowledge Ze.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|(imobt)}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|I'll miss you too, Ze--Stay in touch! Love, Shells}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|4|you've made us think, even if we don't have to}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|The darzeecompany appreciates.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|1|Candy for Ze}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|whatever you do next, i hope you still sing.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|4|nice duckie}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|thanks for all the good times Ze - Sam & Emily}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|Happy days, Ze. See you at SXSW. Make a DVD!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|4|Ze Frank, you bring all the lolz to the yard.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|who's a duckie?}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|you light up the web with funny - thanks. MrKluth}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|2|Thanks!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|we con't to think even when you did it for us tanx}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|Thank}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thanks Ze, we *are* a world sandwich now.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|It's high time, and JC pushed it over the edge.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|thanks for everything ze... i'll miss you.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Thanks for making me laugh}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thanks Ze. You done good.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|3|I'll miss you, thanks for keeping my sanity going!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thanks, Ze!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|4|So long, farewell, Auf Wiedersehen, Adieu!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|2|Can only give a jewel. You deserve so much more.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|Let the greatness you created go on and on. -Jecka}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|thank you so much.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thanks ze, it's been fun! arf & laura xx}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|3|thanks for everything Ze... chicka quack quack.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Thanks ze, it's been fun! arf & laura xx}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|3|Thank you and what's next?}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Does anyone read these??? bigfaceworm.blogspot.com}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thanks for the greatest hits Ze. We'll miss ya so.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|4|<3}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|<3}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Knowledge will be a bit lonelier on the bus--PLJ}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|13823 Sylvan loves zefrank}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|goodbye ze. comeback soon.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|You rock. Looking forward to your next creations.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thank you Ze, for a fabuloso year. Art}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|4|Its been a fantastic year Ze! Well done.-Dil Dil H}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Spanks Ze! -peteryan}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|THANK YOU...the rare kind.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Aloha ze!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|7|this is it where it begins, right?}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thank you Ze! - TonyD}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|Thanks for Everything}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|5|sob! kisses! miss ya ze - ohnonichole}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|Ze, thanks for everything. I'm proud of you!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Thank you ze.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thanks for the show - Mr. Stuff2Do}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Thanks for a year full of laughs}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|It's all I got left and it's yours - stay strong}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Am I too late? Thx for great entertainment! Goose}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|One last ducky, classic yellow. Boundless thanks.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|4|end/begin, same thing...TopangaPurpleDuckie4U&MQ}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|cheers ze, mik}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|This.Ones.4.Marsy.MQ.&ScrabbleBarfing:).love.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|1|Here's your damn candy, now eat it!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|2|Thanks Ze}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|2|Ze! I'm so sad that the internship has to end ~ARK}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|one solitary tear, running down my cheek}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thank you! Seriously.. thank you - Jonathan}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|MM...U're this close to shady!! DC}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Ze is the only thing worth watching. Thanks!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|Last!! Thanks for the ride-chickaquackquack}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|may our future be in hands of visionaries like you}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|What next Ze? Thanks for all this.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|ducky love}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|1|ass & titties}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|sorry about the chess thing. my B dog. -- kazz}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|2|To always remember}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Thanks for being you Ze. -jl}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Hey Brian Robinson - thanks to Ze, your famous!!!!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|small thanks}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|tuh tuhtuh Kah tuhtuh tuh tuhKah}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|2|I hope the LOA has a residency program. Thanks Ze!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|It was the season of Darkness -Charles Dickens}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|6|Where do I hide the bodies? They're getting stinky}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|thanks for the fun times, ze!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|2|Thx for the great shows! - Support for Ze.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Breakfast!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|4|i want to be your forever friend and guitar's too}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|5|Small square: represents so much love from us to u}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|7|awesomeness is ze brightest jewel}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|3|in fact it's so much more than a pipe. love, topaz}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Loved it, Ze! Stay brilliant. -elevatedprimate}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|I'd pay $100K for Ze to do another year!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Thanks, Ze. Knowledge will miss you.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|6|A square duckie 4 u- gonna miss U Ze. frm- Kenni}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|A duck from Bess, the world's best chicken}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|For all you do, this ducky is for you -- Super Lou}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|Thank you.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|We'll miss you, ze! (Really!) -Will}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Thank you Ze and good luck with what's next!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|thank you, ze. -iniko}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|2|Bye Ze! We'll miss you! Please run for Congress!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Love you Ze. From CC+MH in SF}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|You're great. Thanks. Seriously...thanks. -Russish}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|1|you have enough candy dont know why I'm doing this}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|4|thanks, ze}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|Thanks for the ride... That was something special!}}
}}

the show: 03-08-07

75.26.194.220 — Fri, 09 Mar 2007 07:51:42 GMT

Summary: adding sponsors

{{theshow-transcript-header|
current = 03-08-07|
}}

==Transcript==

[''Intro''] Good morning sports racers. From atop of the rigging; by Paikea, New Zealand. You're watching The Show with Ze Frank. [''camera panning down to the yacht beneath'']

['''Ze:'''] First dish, a bit of housekeeping.

[''Sighs'']

[https://secure.tanga.com/ tanga.com] announced the winner of the puzzle contest. Congratulations sports racer [http://www.zefrank.com/theforum/member.php?u=871 Goocher].

Goocher and a friend will be flown to New York where I will give them each a duck.

Tomorrow is the last show you can buy candy for.

Thank you to everyone who has bought candy this year.

I still kinda wanna sell out.

[''snickering''] So if any of you still feel like throwing loose change at the dancing monkey, this is your last chance.

With the Ray story complete and next weeks personal messages show, I'm pretty much done with the internship. [''LOA sound in the background, Ze looking around, suddenly with a LOA message in his hands and eyes wide open''] Binnng!

[''Ze looking irritated''] Show-offs.

[''Ze disgusted, in slow motion with low voice''] Uhhh, the chess thing...

Because I challenged the Fabulosos to a [[Fabuloso Friday 2/Fabuloso Chess|game of chess]] and lost, I have to fulfill my end of the bargain.

The stakes were: [[Fabuloso_Friday_2/Fabuloso_Chess/Fabs_Prize | me and a guitar performing 10 minutes of songs]].

[''Ze smiling''] Hmmm...

[''[[songs|Songs]] performed by [http://www.jonathancoulton.com/ Jonathan Coulton] and Ze'']

Set List:

* [[Fun Winter (song)|Fun Winter]] - [http://www.zefrank.com/theshow/archives/2007/01/010307.html original show]
* [[How Do Spank a Giant Baby? (song)|How Do Spank a Giant Baby?]] - [http://www.zefrank.com/theshow/archives/2006/05/051106.html original show]
* [[I Knows Me Some Ugly (song)|I Knows Me Some Ugly]] - [http://www.zefrank.com/theshow/archives/2006/07/071406.html original show]
* [[If the Earth were a Sandwich (song)|If the Earth were a Sandwich]] - [http://www.zefrank.com/theshow/archives/2006/05/051606.html original show]
* [[Why Does Everything Have To Change? (song)|Why Does Everything Have To Change?]] - [http://www.zefrank.com/theshow/archives/2006/05/052406.html original show]
* [[Hindsight is 20-20 (song)|Hindsight is 20-20]] (with didgeridoo solo) - [http://www.zefrank.com/theshow/archives/2006/05/051506.html original show]
* [[Who's That Baby (Trading Walnuts for Gold?) (song)|Who's That Baby (Trading Walnuts for Gold?)]] - [http://www.zefrank.com/theshow/archives/2006/05/post_2.html original show]
* [[How Do You Work This Thing? (song)|How Do You Work This Thing?]] - [http://www.zefrank.com/theshow/archives/2006/05/051106.html original show]

{{theshow-transcript-sponsors|
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|We're going to miss you too, Ze.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|thanks for the show -vimacs}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Thanks, Ze, for an amazing year.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|It won't be as much fun with you, Ze. Thank you.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|lunch money for your famous future}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Danke!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|our pack will miss you ze - moonblood.net}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|ze, you enrich our lives, thank you so much, crisb}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|For Wray, without whom I'd have no Ze. -Loorah}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|B- Love you... -J ............. Ze: Gonna miss ya.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|it was a nice ride. thanks for the thoughts, man.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|Yalla Hapoel}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|to: Ze. from: ryanharne. thanks.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|RunningFool is so good-looking. Love, RunningFool}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|We'll miss the show. Thanks Ze, from Mpls, Radio K}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|thanks for the ahhhh--MUSE--ment}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|3|0|From one unwavering band of light to another, bye.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Yay duckie.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|Thank you Ze. You rock the town.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|You can play in my pond anytime, Ze. I'll miss you}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|ZeFrank: He's why Al Gore invented the internet.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|3|I'm going to miss you too. <3}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|Thank you for what you've created in the world Ze.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|6|All good things must end. Dang it was good. -Adam}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|Thanking, so you don't have to. - pmsg}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|There's shame in free riding.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|4|Aja, you're the best sister a Ze fan could have!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|2|You don't have to miss us Ze...keep it going!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|1|forever&ever, burnsuburbia.com will miss THE SHOW!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|We're going to miss you, too.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|4|Thanks Ze}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|7|I will miss The Show. Best of luck. --Ben Brockert}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|1|Yuri'sNightWorldSpaceParty! April12 YurisNight.net}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|Cheers Ze for everything, we'll miss you - Loki}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Welp, see ya later!}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|2|We will miss you, Ze! -- B&E}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|Allison O, I miss you. And I like you. A lot. --RM}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|3|who will think for us when ze's gone?}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|8|I'll miss you too. Peace over and peace out. Simon}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|4|And a shiny purple one for Emma. Thank you. Simon}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|7|Circe to Odysseus. That slope is sure slippery.}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|1|red hot ducky from ice-cold Vermont - thanks}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|4|i didn't know you long, but it was good}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|2|0|Ze - Thanks for a fun year, Noonan}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|1|w00t duckie me Ze... hi Ian P Rif}}
{{theshow-transcript-sponsor|1|2|but you can't go...all the plants will die.}}
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