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-   -   Go-it-Semi-Alone Limericks with Help from my Friends (http://www.zefrank.com/bulletin_new/showthread.php?t=5876)

Hyakujo's Fox 04-22-2006 10:49 AM

A teen-aged Brazilian named Claire
Was abruptly deprived of her hair
Except one little patch

Marcus Bales 04-22-2006 11:20 AM

A teen-aged Brazilian named Claire
Was abruptly deprived of her hair
Except one little patch
On each breast at which natch-
Erly everyone tended to stare.

trisherina 04-22-2006 01:05 PM

If you want to make friends with a dog
Say "Hello!" but don't go for a snog

ambo 04-22-2006 02:08 PM

If you want to make friends with a dog
Say "Hello!" but don't go for a snog
Carry pieces of bacon

Zatoichi 04-23-2006 12:45 AM

If you want to make friends with a dog
Say "Hello!" but don't go for a snog
Carry pieces of bacon
And if your backside is shakin'

funkytuba 04-23-2006 07:36 PM

If you want to make friends with a dog
Say "Hello!" but don't go for a snog
Carry pieces of bacon
And if your backside is shakin'
Leave quickly and pinch off a log

Hyakujo's Fox 04-29-2006 01:01 AM

There one was a fellow called Tim
Who was so exceedingly dim

ambo 04-29-2006 01:03 AM

There one was a fellow called Tim
Who was so exceedingly dim
That he really thought Sam
Ate green eggs and ham

Hyakujo's Fox 04-29-2006 01:18 AM

There one was a fellow called Tim
Who was so exceedingly dim
That he really thought Sam
Ate green eggs and ham
So he hopped on his Pop for a whim

Marcus Bales 04-29-2006 10:03 AM

I stood on a hot tin roof
And took off my socks for a goof

Zatoichi 04-29-2006 02:24 PM

I stood on a hot tin roof
And took off my socks for a goof
The cat was alarmed

Hyakujo's Fox 04-30-2006 05:19 AM

I stood on a hot tin roof
And took off my socks for a goof
The cat was alarmed
That my toes had been harmed

Audreyvgs 05-01-2006 11:17 PM

I stood on a hot tin roof
And took off my socks for a goof
The cat was alarmed
That my toes had been harmed
fooled him with a roof goof spoof

Hyakujo's Fox 05-02-2006 12:43 AM

The reason I won't be coming
Is due to a block in my plumbing

Sri Rama 05-02-2006 10:18 AM

The reason I won't be coming
Is due to a block in my plumbing
I should find a good plumber

jasmina 05-02-2006 10:31 AM

The reason I won't be coming
Is due to a block in my plumbing
I should find a good plumber
Who's just slightly dumber

Zatoichi 05-02-2006 09:36 PM

The reason I won't be coming
Is due to a block in my plumbing
I should find a good plumber
Who's just slightly dumber
And won't find the task too mind numbing.

Zatoichi 05-02-2006 09:36 PM

I'm in a bit of a randy mood

ambo 05-03-2006 01:01 AM

I'm in a bit of a randy mood
Pardon me if my staring seems lewd

Hyakujo's Fox 05-03-2006 01:54 AM

I'm in a bit of a randy mood
Pardon me if my staring seems lewd
But it's time I confessed
You're mentally undressed

Audreyvgs 05-03-2006 02:01 AM

I'm in a bit of a randy mood
Pardon me if my staring seems lewd
But it's time I confessed
You're mentally undressed
cept for that part of you stuck in your snood

Marcus Bales 05-03-2006 08:21 AM

If I had a snood, would I know?

ambo 05-03-2006 01:07 PM

If I had a snood, would I know?
Would it smell bad, or worse, would it glow?

Hyakujo's Fox 05-03-2006 09:56 PM

If I had a snood, would I know?
Would it smell bad, or worse, would it glow?
Would it sting like a lash?
Would it give me a rash?

ambo 05-03-2006 10:46 PM

If I had a snood, would I know?
Would it smell bad, or worse, would it glow?
Would it sting like a lash?
Would it give me a rash?
Or would it just swing to and fro?

Zatoichi 05-04-2006 08:14 AM

From shadows, I watch her undress

ambo 05-04-2006 11:29 AM

From shadows, I watch her undress
She knows I am there, nonetheless,

dddrum 05-09-2006 04:07 PM

BEEDEE BEEDEEDEE DEE. We innerup this fine lil pome for a nimpordin bull tin.
 
Okay, Semi-Alone-Type Limericists... I need your help. I've writ a corker, but cannot parse a conclusory line (What's that you say? "Punch"? Well, okaaay... *THwhACK!*). Please help me choose the best of the following:

There was an unfortunate lass
Who was born with her boobs on her ass
She wore her brassiere
On the back of her rear

A.) To the wonder of all she would pass

B.) When she shimmied, men passed out en masse

C.) (Double-fastened, in case she got gas)

4.) Marcus Bales makes great things out of glass


Whaddya s'pose?

Love and rhubarb,
DDD


BEDEE BEDEEE. We now corntinya with the limericiousness in progress...

From shadows, I watch her undress
She knows I am there, nonetheless,
As I ogle her body

ambo 05-09-2006 04:45 PM

I vote for C




From shadows, I watch her undress
She knows I am there, nonetheless,
As I ogle her body
And sip my hot toddy

dddrum 05-09-2006 04:58 PM

From shadows, I watch her undress
She knows I am there, nonetheless,
As I ogle her body
And sip my hot toddy
I'm guessing she's telling me "yes"

Marcus Bales 05-10-2006 09:50 AM

There was an unfortunate lass
Who was born with her boobs on her ass
She wore her brassiere
On the back of her rear --
What a ratio of jiggle to mass!

dddrum 05-10-2006 12:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marcus Bales
There was an unfortunate lass
Who was born with her boobs on her ass
She wore her brassiere
On the back of her rear --
What a ratio of jiggle to mass!

V. nice, M.B.! I'll tag that one Number E).

Remember, the number to call to vote this one through is 888-YAY-BALES... or you can text message "Seacrest Out (but not of the closet)" to the number 9

number 9


number 9



number 9...

Hyakujo's Fox 05-10-2006 11:30 PM

There once was a lass with a notion
That love could be found in a potion

Marcus Bales 05-11-2006 07:42 AM

There once was a lass with a notion
That love could be found in a potion
I bought her a drink
And what do you think --

LeahDear 05-11-2006 02:21 PM

There once was a lass with a notion
That love could be found in a potion
I bought her a drink
And what do you think --
She was overcome with emotion

funkytuba 05-12-2006 02:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dddrum
Okay, Semi-Alone-Type Limericists... I need your help. I've writ a corker, but cannot parse a conclusory line (What's that you say? "Punch"? Well, okaaay... *THwhACK!*). Please help me choose the best of the following:

There was an unfortunate lass
Who was born with her boobs on her ass
She wore her brassiere
On the back of her rear

A.) To the wonder of all she would pass

B.) When she shimmied, men passed out en masse

C.) (Double-fastened, in case she got gas)

4.) Marcus Bales makes great things out of glass

Whaddya s'pose?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marcus Bales
... What a ratio of jiggle to mass!

...And she charmed all the midgets en masse
...But her kid didn't nurse--took a pass
...And she held off the blokes with her gas
...And the pews tweaked her nips while in mass
...Nips got hard when she sat in the grass
...And her hot pants sure showed she had class
...And the cold made them brittle as glass

Hyakujo's Fox 05-12-2006 10:52 AM

There once was a back country hick

LeahDear 05-12-2006 12:04 PM

There once was a back country hick
Who had a 12" long dick

Marcus Bales 05-13-2006 11:34 AM

There once was a back country hick
Who had a 12" long dick
He thought it routine
Til he saw on the screen

dddrum 05-15-2006 05:28 PM

There once was a back country hick
Who had a 12" long dick
He thought it routine
Til he saw on the screen
That a foot-long lures ladies right quick

P.S.: Thank you, Mister Tuba, for entries 5.) through K.); they were quite risible, indeed. However, I decided to go another way... *ahem*

There once was a hapless young lassie
Who was born with her boobs on her ass, see
She wore a bustier
Down derriere way
Showing just enough cleft to be classy

...G'NIGHT EVERYBODY!!! **OOO-GAH! OOO-GAH!!!**


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